Until the End of Eternity, and Longer
by Kosaka
Summary: COMPLETE! The past is something not so easily forgotten. A not-so-little story about love. loss, and family. first in the "A Family Thing" arc. (traditional pairings)
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer: I don't own FFVIII or any of it's chars.  
  
A/N and Summary: My first attempt at a FFVIII fanfic. It's going to be pretty long too, and involves lots of "flashbacks" and such. The idea sorta came to me when I was playing the game thinking about how all the kids were orphans and such. I wanted to know what their parents might have been like, so I decided to explore the idea in fanfic format. Irvine happened to be the first one who came to me. I know it sounds cheesy and cliché, but it sorta. . . came to me in a dream. Haha. Anyway, I have probably about 3/4 of the story written, and there are some weird twists, but since it's long it'll take me a while to upload 'em all. If you like the story and r&r, I may be persuaded to upload faster. . . Anyways, on with the story!  
  
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"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter One  
  
There were some villages so small they weren't on any maps anywhere, and you only stumbled upon them by sheer accident, or by the will of the gods. That was how it was with Bella Maure. And in all honesty, the group couldn't be happier about their accidental discovery if they tried. It had been a long mission, and they'd ended up stranded. It was only Squall's survival training and Zell's endless optimism that had kept them going for so long. Even Selphie's cheerful smiles were starting to look strained. They'd been running almost entirely out of supplies, and with their water stock as low as it was, Irvine was getting really worried. The middle of a Centra desert was NOT the place you wanted to suddenly run out of water.  
  
Centra was a wasteland, an endless terrain of monsters and brutal sunshine that didn't give. They were tired, sweaty, stranded, and then, in the middle of the desert heat, they spotted it, Bella Maure.  
  
"A mirage," Irvine commented as he squinted in the distance at the tiny steepled roofs. "Even so, might as well go that way."  
  
"We're going to die out here, aren't we?" Rinoa said hopelessly as she wiped some sweat from her brow.  
  
Even Squall had rid himself of jacket and gloves hours ago, and had stuffed them into his utility duffel. Irvine, on the other hand, had decided to use his coat as a carry all, his purple vest, what remained of his potions, water and food, all tied up in the tiny package and slung absently over his shoulder.  
  
"Maybe it's an oasis. Crazier things have happened," Zell said, really really hoping. "We should be able to contact someone to come get us if it's a real village, someone's GOT to have a phone, right?"  
  
"It does LOOK real," Squall said. "Whatever. Let's just go that way."  
  
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It was another hour's hike before they arrived, but they found that as they got closer, the air seemed to get cooler. A genuine oasis. 'I don't believe it. Zell was right,' Squall thought. 'And that is another one for the list of things I will never ever admit out loud.'  
  
"Yay!" Selphie cheered, jumping up with a sudden burst of energy. "We're not gonna die!"  
  
"I would say that is definitely one for the yay vote," Irvine commented, smirking at his tiny girlfriend. 'The air is so much cooler here. Feels like my lungs are coming to after a long nap. And speaking of naps.I definitely want one.'  
  
Bella Maure. It would have been beautiful in that quaint way even if it hadn't been stumbled upon by accident in desperation. Cobblestone streets and tiny wells beside a dozen and a half open doorways. Old women in rocking chairs knitting scarves and quilts that would likely never be used. Old men smoking pipes and telling stories to small children. Younger men and women working to keep the village alive. A fresh water lake in the center of town with a stone bridge that ran from the four points: north, south, east and west, to a grand statue in the center of a true cowboy, or cowgirl, as the case appeared to be.  
  
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After stopping at one of the wells where the five travelers each took their turns with a bit of water, Irvine noticed this and let out a low whistle. "Now that is some fine work," he commented, looking a bit of distance away at the large memorial. There she was, cowboy hat ,denim jeans and jacket with the sleeves cuffed to just below the elbow and a tee cut off to just above the flat, but muscular stomach. Hiker's boots and a wide grin, the woman depicted had a long, loose ponytail flowing down her back, blowing in the wind with a few strands falling around her face, or tucked behind her ear, and a pair of Excalibur pistols, one held in the air at ready, thumb pulling back the safety, the other aimed to fire. The holsters had been carved beneath the billowing wind that had caught her jacket, and a belt with different parcels for bullets rested on her hips. "Looks like one brave lady," he commented, wanting to take a closer look.  
  
"She would've hated that thing," an old man smiled as he moved to an open doorway and looked at the group. He greeted them with a nod. "Welcome to Bella Maure," he said. "We haven't had a stranger wander in her for fifteen years. Make yourselves at home. If you need anything, just ask anyone. We're more than willing to help, and people who wander in here usually need the help."  
  
"Who was she?" Rinoa asked as she stared at the distant statue.  
  
"Her name was Jace, and she was." he shrugged. "A hero. The hero, really, but I guess you're all a bit too young to remember the first Sorceress War. Go on up and read the inscription. If you want the whole story afterwards, go on over to the Blue Moon Tavern and ask for Kennedy. He knew her better than anyone around here."  
  
"Aurin!" a woman's voice called from inside. "Lunch time!"  
  
"Ah, my cue," he smiled. "Come by later if you want, I'll introduce you to my lovely wife of fifty-seven years," he said proudly. "Or if you want to just play some cards. Triple triad. That's what we play here. If you don't know it, I can teach you." 


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer: no own, no sue.  
  
Here's a nice short chapter for you. . . think that's all I'll upload for today.  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Two  
  
'In memoriam, it read. "There are some things that last forever. Hope, faith, the will to follow your dreams and to fight for what you believe in, always. The ability to love, and to live. And most importantly, the human heart. The human heart lasts until the end of eternity, and longer." ~Jace Kinneas (September 17, 103-March 3, 127)  
  
For your unparalleled bravery and grace, love of life and that never- ending smile that could light up the world, Jace, we will always love you. And for your sacrifices, your will to fight to the very end, Jace, we will never forget. You will be in our hearts until the end of eternity, and longer. ~L.L.'  
  
Irvine couldn't find any words. His eyes just went wide and his throat closed off completely. That woman, was he related to her? Was he in some way related to this amazing woman who had done some great thing to save the world. 'Until the end of eternity, and longer. Why does that feel so familiar?' And some distant part of him wanted to find out who this L.L. person was so that he could thank them personally for phrasing her memorial with such elegance and grace. He was just completely stunned, didn't know what he was thinking or feeling, really. Shock. Shock and.pride.  
  
"K-Kinneas?!?" Selphie stuttered in shock and looked from the statue over to Irvine.  
  
"Ya gotta admit.there is sorta.a resemblance," Zell said finally.  
  
Finally, Irvine let out a low whistle, realizing suddenly that he'd been holding his breath as if breathing would make the moment end, the statue disappear.  
  
'This woman.I wonder if she's Irvine's.mother,' Squall wondered to himself. Even he had to admit, she looked a lot like Irvine. It wasn't that exactly though, it was something else. The smile. They had the same manic, yet charming, smile. Not that he'd ever say that charming part out loud.  
  
"Would it be okay with y'all if we went to that Blue Moon place?" Irvine asked finally. "I'd like.to know. Ya know, who she was, what she did.everything about her, really."  
  
"I think that would be great," Rinoa answered for everyone, knowing Squall would just have said, "whatever," or something equally as inconsequential. "We can ask if the tavern has a phone too. Taverns usually do, right?"  
  
Zell nodded. "Yeah, I can't believe the fuel tank got punched through. What a mess," he groaned as he thought about their poor jeep. That seemed like forever ago now.  
  
Irvine took one more look up over his shoulder at the larger than life image of the woman, as if trying to burn her instantly onto his memory forever, even the stone gray version of her, as they crossed the bridge to the west where the largest building rested alone, elaborate red paint reading the words, "Blue Moon" on a wooden sign hanging over the door.  
  
Was this home? That's what he wanted to know. Was this the place where he was supposed to grow up? The place he was supposed to belong? And what if it was?  
  
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okay, thoughts, opinions. Just so y'all know, I haven't finished the game yet, so if I go against anything that happens in it, just call this an AU fic and take it as is. 


	3. Chapter Three

Okay, I know I said I wasn't gonna upload anymore today, but since the first few chapters are so short, I decided to go ahead. And if you want to be completely technical, it'll be tomorrow in 38 minutes. Uh, anyway, here's chapter three, I'll probably upload four too since it's only like two pages long, I think. *chews bottom lip b/c even though she just formatted it, she can't remember*.uh, anyways, here goes. . .  
  
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"Until the end of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Three  
  
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"The conference went well, didn't it Kiros? Why is Uncle Laguna so depressed?" Ellone asked.  
  
Ward made an inaudible sigh and nodded at the calendar. Kiros nodded at him sadly. Sure, they both knew EXACTLY what was bothering him, and the secret language they were using was extremely obvious.  
  
"It's an old wound, Ellone. He gets this way around this time every year. Just let him be," he said.  
  
"Why won't you tell me?" Ellone pouted. "I can find out easily enough, you know." She only pulled that when she really wanted to know something. And they all knew that she could, and that she wouldn't. Invading his privacy like that, it was just wrong to do it unless it was utterly necessary.  
  
"Someone important to Laguna died a long time ago, not long from now. Just let him grieve in peace," Kiros warned.  
  
"Uncle Laguna has lost so many people that he cares a lot about, hasn't he?" Ellone frowned, defeated. "I mean, his mother and father, and Julia, and Raine, and this mysterious person who you REFUSE TO TELL ME ABOUT."  
  
"It's not my place to say. I only met her once, anyway. But I respect her a lot. We don't talk about her because she didn't want to be remembered. Just drop it."  
  
"And Squall won't forgive him either," Ellone pouted. "It's so sad. I don't like seeing Uncle Laguna frown."  
  
"Neither do we, Ellone. Neither do we."  
  
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Laguna stared at the work on his desk rather than doing it. He just couldn't concentrate. He looked at his calendar blankly. Today was March 1st. Jace had sacrificed herself using that suicide bullet two days from now to end the war and destroy the Sorceress. He missed her so much. She'd been like a sister to him.  
  
"Back then. Back then, I thought you'd always be around. Jace, you were so strong. I miss you," Laguna shook his head disgustedly. "It's been seventeen years since then. You'd think I would be able to get past it, but that look in your eyes, that look of resignation.and the way you smiled at me, and told me to be strong, and to always follow my heart, to never stop fighting.I think I took you a little too seriously." He pulled a picture out of his desk drawer of a much younger version of himself and Jace. They appeared to be ten years old maybe, and at some sort of carnival by a lake, smiling widely, ice cream dripping down their hands, Jace's arm thrown absently over his shoulder as he had devil horns sticking up behind her head. 'We were so happy then. We felt like, even if the world came to an end, it would be okay, as long as we could remember the happy moments.' "But it's not okay. You're gone. And I.don't know what I'm supposed to do. My son hates me, for one. He thinks I'm completely inept, you know. I'm the president of a country pretty much by accident. I met your son. I know him kinda well actually. He looks just like you and I want to tell him all about you so that he can be as proud of you as I am, but he's so happy now, the way he is, just him and his friends and his girlfriend Selphie.I know, above all else, you wanted him to be happy, so I keep my mouth shut to respect your wishes, but it's really hard to not look at him and say, "you're mother was a hero, Irvine" or "I wish you could have met her" or "she would be really proud of you." He helped save the world too. And he has your penchant for guns and a flair for the dramatic. And he has your smile. Gods, it's all I can do to not cry when I see him smile that way you used to. Happy as hell in spite of everything, or because of it. I don't know what I'm doing, Jace. I was supposed to have it figured out by now, but somewhere along the line, all my dreams got buried with the people I've left behind. People like you, and Raine, and.I don't even want to think about it. When you were around, I always knew who I was, and who I wanted to be. You just had that effect on people. You made people want to be better, stronger, to shine just a little bit brighter. But since you died.for the past seventeen years I've just been so damn confused. I would've gotten myself killed a million times over if it wasn't for Kiros and Ward. I think I.I need a little time off. I want to visit you. Would it be okay, do you think, if I took a little trip to Bella Maure? Just a little while. Just to, ya know, say hi? I think I need it, more than anything. I just want to see you again."  
  
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That night, Laguna had left Kiros and Ward in charge of things, got on a small, private jet, and set out for Centra. No one argued with him. The president need a vacation once in a while, if anyone asked, he was relaxing on a beach somewhere, that's what Kiros and Ward decided amongst themselves.  
  
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Before you even ask, yes, eventually the chapters DO get longer, but not until I have the background set up. Next chapter is short too.  
  
Thanks to Cherry 6124 for reviewing. It's nice to know that people are reading this stuff. And I like opinions, good, bad, ugly. I even accept flames. . .you see, I print them all up, pin them to my cork board and giggle maniacally as I throw darts at them. Okay, not really, but it's a damn good idea isn't it? *note to self: buy a corkboard at the first opportunity*. . . well, more to come. . . 


	4. Chapter Four

'kay, here's chapter four. As always, I don't own FFVIII, and I DO appreciate r&r. *hint hint*  
  
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"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Four  
  
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The tavern stopping cold when they walked in (once again fully clothed, jackets and all, since it was getting dark and a chill wind was coming in from the West) was not exactly the effect Irvine had been going for. Neither was the sound of shattering glass what he'd expected to hear as the bartender (a man about Laguna's age with chestnut hair tightly tied back into a tiny bobbed ponytail and near-black eyes) saw them and dropped the glass he'd been wiping. "Jace," he whispered, but then it hit him suddenly, and he smiled, walking over.  
  
Squall didn't miss it. Whoever this man was, he KNEW something.  
  
"Irvine," the man said as he stood in front of him, nearly a foot shorter than the cowboy. "You're the last person I expected to see just wander in here. Hyne, look at you. You've gotten so big!" he grinned widely, but there was something sad about the smile too. "And you look just like your mother. Oh, but don't just stand there like a doormat. Come in! Have a seat. Do you and your friends want something to drink, eat? The stoves aren't on right now, but I can have them heated up in just a little while."  
  
Before he could find any words Irvine was being dragged softly by the hand to a table near a small stage, and the others just followed, a million questions formulating in their minds. Though Zell was still stuck on the first one that no one had ever gotten around to answering yet: 'where exactly are we?'  
  
"I'm sorry, but I don't remember you," Irvine managed finally.  
  
The man looked a little hurt, but not surprised. "Oh, well I guess you wouldn't. I haven't seen you since you were four years old. I used to help change your diapers," he laughed. "Damned if that doesn't make me feel old as heck though. Anyway, beside the point entirely."  
  
'There was a point to all that banter?' Squall wondered quietly, and Rinoa, who had learned to read his expressions, slapped his arm lightly. He just glared at her.  
  
"What brings you all the way back to Bella Maure?" the man asked.  
  
"I..we.just sort of.stumbled upon it," Irvine admitted. "I really don't remember ever being here.." he tried desperately to phrase a sentence, but since he couldn't, Selphie, in her usually chipper way, saved him.  
  
"When we arrived, we saw that statue, and we read the little inscription and saw that the woman's name was Kinneas, Irvine's last name. We wanted to know what the connection was, and."  
  
"Everything," Irvine interjected quickly.  
  
"An old man said there was someone named Kennedy here who could tell us her story," Rinoa added.  
  
"Kennedy, yup, that's me," he said, pointing a thumb at his chest. "I can tell you what I know. And there are pictures and some video footage of the performances I think, if I can get that antique machinery to work..It's a long story though. You sure you're up to it?"  
  
"I want to know about her," Irvine said by way of answer. "She was. She was my mother, wasn't she?"  
  
"No, Irvine," Kennedy said sadly, and a pitiable frown crossed Irvine's features, like his hopes had been suddenly dashed, before Kennedy said, "she'll always be your mother. Always. She loved you more than anything. It broke her heart when she had to leave you behind, but she wanted you to be safe and happy, and she knew that, even if she could make you happy, by being with you, and loving you, she couldn't keep you safe. So she chose to love you, always, and to give you up with the hope that you would find a life full of big dreams and big hearts.  
  
"Some people are just dealt a bad hand, I suppose. I knew that she was one of 'em from the very beginning."  
  
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Okies, 'nother short chapter down. Next one coming soon. 


	5. Chapter Five

Okay, here we go, another chapter. . . they're getting a tad bit longer, but not much.  
  
I don't own FFVIII or any of it's characters. I do however own Kennedy, Jace, and the song "Forever" that you'll find in this chapter. I'm not a musician, so it's a pretty crappy song, but still, please don't steal it. I worked really hard to write it, so stealing it, good or otherwise, would make me sad.  
  
Notations: "speech". 'thoughts'. EMPAHSIS. *song/music*.  
  
Anyways, on with the fic. . .  
  
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Chapter Five  
  
"When I first met Jace, it was the middle of the night. She stumbled into town beaten and bloody with a baby wrapped up in a denim jacket, fast asleep. She held that baby close to her chest like he was her only reason for living, and when we took him, gave him a proper blanket and tucked him in to a cradle for sleep, she just smiled and then passed out. We couldn't imagine how she'd made it through that sandstorm at all, or why she'd ever want to. But we knew, she had a story. Definitely.  
  
"We all loved Jace. I guess we did from the very beginning. She was so strong, had such a fierce will without being callous or cold at all. She was a kind woman, but also, there was something about her that made you want to be a better man. When you talked to Jace, you just knew, you were talking to someone who was going to make a difference in this crazy world, just knew it. Even if the deck was stacked against here, you couldn't help but see it, in her eyes, there was just something eternal there, something precious, and you wanted to be stronger to protect that something, even if she never needed any protecting.  
  
"See, Jace had a GF. I know, I know, nowadays junctioning and GFs are no big thing. But back then, before Garden figured out how it went, it was a huge deal. If a GF picked you, it meant you were someone really strong, someone really special. And Jace had this GF Crow, you could just see it in her eyes, that she wasn't alone in there."  
  
Squall stopped him. "Crow? I've never heard of any GF Crow. Garden has all the known GFs."  
  
"Sure it does. Crow died with Jace. Didn't want to live in a world without her, I guess, but that's a part of the story I don't know much about. I wasn't there when she died. Anyway, I can tell you the beginning things, what she was like, how she ended up here and such, and when her friend came to get her and she had to leave. If you want to know more after that, I can tell you the name of someone who can tell you the sadder parts. If you need to know everything. You can let me know when I'm done. Or, actually, since it's a really long story, I'll get you some of those pictures and things I told you about, you can look them over, and we'll spend all day tomorrow reliving old times if you want. I have to close this place up, there's a room upstairs where y'all can stay."  
  
Irvine nodded blankly.  
  
Laden with photographs and machinery that Kennedy said "might work", Irvine, Selphie, Zell, Rinoa, and Squall headed upstairs.  
  
"What are these things?" Zell asked, flipping a black cassette over in his hand.  
  
"Videos," Kennedy told them. "Technologically, we're pretty far behind the times here in Bella Maure. But we used to record important things sometimes. Birthday parties, festivals, and sometimes we recorded Jace's performances."  
  
"That's the second time you mentioned performances," Squall noted. "What sort of performances?"  
  
"Jace was a musician. She used to sing and play in the bar downstairs. She didn't want to be recognized or famous or anything. She just liked to sing. She had such a beautiful voice too, and a guitar. That was her favorite instrument. I know it's still around here somewhere. I'll have to find it for you. She could've gone through her whole life just singing and playing that guitar. Up on that stage, it was like the whole world existed in the vacuum of that moment, or should. She was so happy then, singin' and playin' with Irvine asleep in the crowd, or when he was a little bigger, clappin' and cheerin' her on. You used to love to watch her play. I guess you don't remember that either though," Kennedy said sadly. "It's a damn shame, if you ask me. She was so young. She shouldn't be dead. She should still be alive. But I guess it's all the same. Old age wouldn't have suited her, middle-age probably would have suited her even less. Twenty-five years.it's too short a life. Well, g'night. Breakfast is served at ten, on the dot."  
  
When the door closed behind him, Irvine whispered, "she'd only be forty-two now, if she was alive. I can't meet her; I can't remember her.this sucks."  
  
Selphie wrapped her arms around his neck and laid her head on his shoulder briefly where he sat on the edge of one of the beds.  
  
"Maybe the pictures will help you remember something," she whispered. "Anyway, I'm sure you'll want to know no matter what. It sounds like your mom was someone really special."  
  
".yeah," Irvine answered, taking on an uncharacteristically Squall- like monosyllabism.  
  
"Look Irvy, this must be you!" Selphie cheered over a picture she appeared to find particularly adorable. Jace was on stage with a diapered little boy in her lap and they were pounding on the keys of a piano together. In the pictures next to it, Irvine was barefoot in shorts and t- shirt, holding the grossly oversized cowboy hat up with his hands and sitting on her stomach beside a pre-statue lake. A young, dark-haired man seemed to be fishing beside her, only the back of his head in view, and she seemed to be chatting with him.  
  
Rinoa and Squall were absently flipping through an album that seemed to be filled with pictures of Jace on stage with her guitar. In some of them, a very tiny Irvine was strapped to her back somehow, sleeping soundly, in others she was alone, or she was up there with a younger version of Kennedy who was playing the piano that was still on the stage to this day.  
  
Squall's eyes widened suddenly at one picture of the album. "Laguna?!?"  
  
THAT got everyone's attention. Rinoa looked more carefully. Yes, that was most DEFINITELY Laguna, grinning impishly into the camera as he held devil horns up behind Jace's head, just barely visible over the rim of her hat. Jace had her left arm slung over Laguna's shoulder absently, wearing a very Irvine-esque grin, and the pair were crouched down to get Irvine into the picture, about three years old here and hopping in an attempt to get his hands on his mother's hat, fingers just touching the brim as the photo was shot.  
  
Everyone came over to see. There were a few pictures of the trio, actually, and one even had Kiros standing behind Laguna's shoulder, arms crossing his chest as he wore a barely there smirk at how "cute" it all was. Even Zell managed to get up off the floor from trying to "hook-up" the "blasted antique piece of crap" to play the videos long enough to take a look.  
  
"He looks younger than when Ellone sent us back," he commented. It was true, he looked as if he was about twenty-three, but Squall didn't see what that had to do with anything. What did his father have to do with any of this? 'If I find out he abandoned ANOTHER kid other than just me, so help me.'  
  
".L.L. Laguna Loire," Irvine realized suddenly. "I'd put money on Kennedy giving us Laguna's name tomorrow, after he's told us what he knows."  
  
"But how do you suppose Laguna was connected to your mother, Irvine? You don't think." Rinoa said, voicing the question she could feel in the tension of Squall's shoulders.  
  
"Nah. No way! But I'd like to know why he's never mentioned that he knew my mom before. A little pissed about it actually. But I'll be angry with him later, for now, I just want to find out everything I can."  
  
"Well, on that note, I think I got that damn box hooked up right, if we can figure out how to work it," Zell said, moving over to the television. "Let's see, Kennedy said press this button, then this one, push the tape in here and.this one, I think."  
  
Static, and they all waited in anticipation. Suddenly, black with shadows of light, somebody's boots, and the voice of a young man saying, "okay okay! I think it's on. How do I work this ridiculous thing?"  
  
Suddenly, the view shifts up, the inside of a somewhat newer-looking Blue Moon. "Hey! Alright! I think I got it as long as I don't have to turn it off!" the man laughs. "So Ken-ken, how's the grand reopening feel?" he said cheerily, as if trying to behave like a proper journalist and happiness causing him to fail miserably.  
  
"It FEELS like it's not for another three hours 'guna. Point that thing somewhere else would you? I don't want to be in your documentary."  
  
"Aaawww. Come On! It's fun! You know you love it!" he said confidently.  
  
"What does he love 'guni?"  
  
"Hey, quit calling me gooney," the voice protested.  
  
Squall was getting a sinking feeling that he knew exactly who the man behind the camera was, and if that was the case "gooney" couldn't be more appropriate, as far as he was concerned. He smirked a little at the thought.  
  
The camera made a sickeningly quick spin and soon focused on the woman.  
  
"He loves being in my little movie! But you get to be the star. And Irvine's best supporting actor!"  
  
"Na-na-no!" Jace protested, waving her hands in the air and lifting Irvine up, spinning him around and holding him out proudly to the camera as he giggled happily. "I'm dizzy Uncle 'guni!" he announced happily.  
  
"You've got it backwards Laguna. Irvine's gotta be the star! Who would deny this face?" she said cheerfully as she pulled the boy in for a quick hug before placing him down on a nearby table top.  
  
"Aw, I guess you're right," Laguna said. "But you still have to do a song for me tonight so I can record you in action, for posterity's sake! You've written something new, haven't you?"  
  
"Sure have!" she said, just a hint of embarrassment on her voice as the topic of her music came up.  
  
"You're gonna be famous one day Jace. You're so talented. I never liked music much until I heard you sing."  
  
"Oh gimme a break 'guna! You just like playing with my guitar!" she laughed.  
  
"Well, that too," he laughed.  
  
"Now gimme that!" she grabbed the camera and spun it onto Laguna.  
  
He was wearing combat boots and jeans that were obviously a bit too big for him with a white tank. But Squall's eyes widened as he saw that the machine gun he'd known to be Laguna's choice weapon was not where it should be, a gunblade in its place.  
  
Laguna raised one hand to his head in nervousness, shifting from foot to foot. "Aw, comeon, give it back, I'm not supposed to be in my own movie," he protested.  
  
"Sure ya are!" Jace said. "I just made you the new star. I think I'll call this film, "How Jace got 'guna to use a proper gun instead of one of those halfsie gunblade deals. I mean, comeon! What is it? It's not a gun. It's not a sword. It's total.ego enhancement!" she teased. (Squall scowled. She was making fun of gunblades. He LIKED gunblades.)  
  
Little Irvine chose that moment to plow into Laguna's leg. "Uncle Guni! Up!" he said as he started bouncing up and down with his hands held in the air. Laguna was glad to oblige.  
  
"Let's shut off the camera for now Jace. I want to have room left to record the reopening tonight."  
  
"Roger wilko!" she said and the screen went black again.  
  
"Well that shot any "dad" theories that might've been going around out there straight to hell," Irvine commented, looking at Squall briefly, who he was sure was wondering.  
  
But there was no reply, the video started again and all attention shifted.  
  
This time, the Blue Moon was lit with a few dozen paper lanterns strung from the ceiling.  
  
"Ooo! Pretty!" Selphie commented. 'Have to keep that in mind for the next party.' But she shushed herself quickly. Irvine needed to see this.  
  
It took the person behind the camera less time to get it working properly this time and he quietly and slowly scanned the room, filled with villagers who were laughing and joking quietly. Kennedy was behind the bar pouring drinks and laughing over some joke or other.  
  
Jace came down with Irvine, who looked sleepy, but insistent on being present and Laguna commented, "he's so stubborn. Knows he's supposed to be asleep in bed, but insists on being down here for all his mom's shows. He'll be asleep under the table in less that five minutes. Haha. Irvine is such a cute kid."  
  
The camera moved closer to the stage, bouncing ever so slightly with Laguna's steps. He took to a corner in the left. "Don't wanna block anyone's view. I guess this is okay. Can't wait to hear Jace's new song. It'll be great whatever it is."  
  
He zoomed the camera in on Jace, who gave Irvine a warm smile and a kiss on the forehead before handing him over to a middle-aged woman who happily let him curl up in her lap. Little Irvine's expression was one of a kid who should've been asleep hours ago, but he rubbed his eyes with fierce determination to keep himself awake for the song.  
  
"Well this is something new," Laguna said softly as the song picked up with a slow beat. Kennedy made his way to the stage to accompany her with a barely there piano. Jace said, "this is a new song. I know it's quite a bit different than what I usually play, but it comes from the heart, so I hope y'all like it. It's called *Forever*."  
  
After a few more moments, she began to sing.  
  
*You were always there, standing in the rain like a neglected promise  
  
And I thought that meant that you would love me forever  
Guess Love is just another word for getting by.  
But it's okay, I don't mind. I don't mind.  
  
Because when the icicle melts, I'm still here  
Frozen in fear, and longing for another battered star  
To remember me by. I don't know why I keep trying.  
I guess it makes me feel like I'm flying.  
  
When I feel like I'm broken down and falling faster than  
A shooting star, there you are, to remind me.  
(she turned her face toward Laguna now)  
And when all the walls are bleeding, and all my dreams receding,  
I find you standing beside me with a smile and your arms wide open.  
  
(back to the crowd, looking at a sleeping Irvine and Laguna's camera  
doesn't miss it)  
  
You brush my face with this frozen dream  
  
And remind me, some things last until the end of eternity, and longer.  
Here's this love in my heart-it's all for you.  
Here's this light in my eyes-it's all for you.  
And when I can smile in spite of it all-it's all for you  
My tiny shooting star. The dream I'll never abandon.  
  
In your face I find a lifetime of disgrace, and the will  
To go on.  
To never give up.  
As long as we're together I'll be strong.  
As long as you're my reason, I'll know where I belong.  
  
When I feel like I'm broken down and falling faster than  
A shooting star, there you are to remind me.  
And when all the walls are bleeding, and all my dreams receding,  
I find you standing beside me with a smile and your arms wide open.  
  
Sweet baby, it's been rough, but I'm hanging tough  
As long as I have you.  
One bloody masquerade, a broken heart's charade, but I can fight,  
As long as I have you.  
  
You brush my face with this frozen dream and remind me,  
Some things last until the end of eternity, and longer.  
You say, "I love you mama"  
You say, "you're the only family I have, or want"  
You say "You belong to me, forever, whether you like it or not"  
(this last line sung with a bit of bitterness) and you remind me, some things last until the end of eternity, and longer.  
  
When I feel like I'm broken down and falling faster than  
A shooting star, there you are to remind me.  
And when all the walls are bleeding, and all my dreams receding,  
I find you standing beside me with a smile.  
  
Your eyes, like diamonds, pierced through my soul  
And left me stronger than I wanted to be.  
But I'm still me.*  
  
A lullaby of a guitar riff signifies the end of the song. And the screen goes black.  
  
Irvine buried his head deep inside the shadow of his hat to hide his eyes. He couldn't keep from crying. "Mom," he whispered. Only Selphie could hear him. She gave Rinoa a look and the dark-haired girl nodded. Squall, Zell, why don't we get some air, huh?"  
  
Squall took one look at Irvine and understood, standing, but pretending to just be humoring Rinoa. "Whatever."  
  
"Come on Zell," Rinoa said, and it took Zell a moment longer, but he bounced up onto his feet and ended up saying, "I think I'll see if Kennedy makes hot dogs!" before bounding downstairs. He was the odd man out. He'd rather leave Squall and Rinoa alone too, so that left chatting with the bartender. He didn't mind. It was cool.  
  
When they were gone, Selphie wrapped her arms around Irvine's shoulders and let him cry. "Irvy," she whispered.  
  
"I want to remember her, Sephie. I want to remember so badly."  
  
"I know Irvy. I know. It's okay. I'm sure you'll remember something. She loved you a lot. That's the sort of thing you don't forget."  
  
~~~~~~ okay, so yes, I know there's no such GF as GF Crow, but I figure I'm taking enough liberties with the story as is, one more isn't gonna kill anyone, right? 


	6. Chapter Six

Disclaimer again: it's on the first chapter, isn't it? And it still applies? Do I have to repeat myself for the umpteenth time? Well, poop. I don't own it. There, happy now? *scowls and sulks*  
  
Okay, here's chapter six. Most of the main chars show up here, and we find out Laguna's reasoning behind not telling Irvine about his mother. Laguna seems a little ooc here, but that's half the point, so I guess it's okay.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
Chapter Six  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Squall stopped dead and blinked when he saw the figure kneeling by the statue. For some reason, he just wanted to see it again, so he and Rinoa walked in silence over the bridge. But.what was Laguna doing here? He debated for a moment whether to confront him or not when he saw the man lying a large bundle of belladonna lilies at the foot of the statue. He hadn't noticed them, even Squall felt like he was invading the man's privacy as he saw him wipe tears from his eyes with the back of his hand in the moonlight.  
  
"Hiya Jace. It's been a long time, hasn't it? I miss you," Laguna said, his voice quivering. "You'd think, after so long, this would be easier. But what am I supposed to do. After my mom and dad died, you were all I had. I tried to move on and live a normal life. I did, but I have this habit of always taking the wrong road first. I wonder why that is. You always made doing the right thing look so easy, you know. But I've done pretty shitty at following in your footsteps. I guess I did all the right things eventually, the things that someone had to do and that there wasn't anyone else for. I never did get to become a journalist though, but I'm too old to go chasing after those silly dreams now. It's okay though, I don't mind much. I mean, I got to fall in love with a really great woman.but I lost her. I wasn't there when she died.and my son, gods he can't stand me, and it's not as if I can make up for seventeen years of not being there. I.don't know what to do.I." he sobbed for a few moments before managing to choke out, "I'm still afraid of being alone you know. Why'd you have to leave? You promised you'd always be there. You lied to me." He wanted to say more, wanted to tell her about her son, how she'd be really proud of him, but he just broke out into sobs for a long few minutes before he could find his voice again.  
  
Squall was horrified. He always thought his father was inept, but to see him broken like this...it just sucked. He knew he should turn around and go away, but, he couldn't move. Rinoa had long since snuck away without his noticing. But Laguna had started to speak again. "I got to meet your son again, too. You'd be so proud of him Jace. He helped save the world, and didn't even die doing it," he scolded. "It's so hard to not tell him that I knew you, that he looks like you, or that you were the best, ya know. But I know knowing your story would make him sad, so I keep my big mouth shut on the matter because you only ever wanted him to be happy.but I wonder if that's the right thing. Do I really have any right to make that decision? I liked you better when you were being bossy, at least then I got answers. But.gods.a suicide bullet? Jace, wasn't there another way? Well, I guess you didn't think so, and you always had a flair for the dramatic. It's silly, you know, but more than anything, I just wish I could hear your voice again. Not sad like it was in Deling, but happy, like those few years that you were out here in Bella Maure. I want to see you're smiling face, not just a stone replica of it. And Irvine, gods, he has your smile. He reminds me so much of you that it hurts. I want to know that wherever you are, you're happy. I know I should let you go, but it's not an easy thing to do. You were like a sister to me. You were so important. I wonder if I was anything near that to you. I shouldn't have asked you to help me out. I shouldn't have asked you to come with me. If I didn't ask, you'd still be alive. Hmph. Wrong road, like I said. Maybe I really am just as inept as Squall thinks I am. It's all my fault."  
  
Laguna shifted, and jumped when he saw someone out of the corner of his vision. "Squall?!?" He wiped his eyes roughly. 'He would have to be here to see me like this. How humiliating.' He just stared at his son, sort of horrified and also, wondering what Squall was doing in Bella Maure.  
  
Squall had his hand resting on his hip, his head cocked to one side, his brow was furrowed as if he knew he should say something but was puzzling over what it ought to be. "You should have told him something," he said finally.  
  
"So he could hate me as much as you do?" Laguna laughed a little bitterly. He just couldn't help it, the depression he'd been locked in the past two weeks stuck onto him and making him older than he was. Squall had never seen this side of him, didn't know it existed, and he realized, he didn't want it to exist. It was just so wrong, to see Laguna sad like this. "I'm the reason his mother died. How am I supposed to tell him that?"  
  
"Well, he knows that you knew each other pretty well. You'll have to tell him, whether you like it or not. He wants to know everything." Squall wanted to know too. Laguna blamed himself for Jace's death. They were his words enscripted on this memorial. Squall half-wondered if Laguna was being to hard on himself, or if one of his mistakes had gone fatal. Either way, Squall found himself wanting to know.  
  
Laguna nodded sadly, leaning back against the railing of the bridge. "She was my hero, you know. I wanted to be just like her," Laguna told him, looking up at the statue. His shoulders sagged, the moonlight casting shadows over every sign of age on his face, making him look twenty-years older than he was when he frowned. Squall couldn't remember ever seeing Laguna frown before. He looked so desolate and sad. "I really fucked up. I don't blame you for hating me," he said as he kicked off of the railing and turned his back on the young man, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I hate me," he said finally before walking away.  
  
"I.don't hate you," Squall whispered. "I think you're a moron, but I don't hate you." But Laguna didn't hear him, and Squall didn't mean for him to. Saying that now would have sounded too much like pity, and Squall wasn't the pitying type. Laguna was just a guy who made a lot of mistakes. They both knew it. And Squall might be angry at spending his life alone when his father was alive and well, but he knew that he wouldn't feel any better about Laguna for leaving Ellone to die either. It was a bad situation and couldn't be helped. Squall looked up at the smiling face of the statue, cast now in moonlight and shadow. 'What would I have done?' he wondered.  
  
'You'd have gone after Ellone,' a voice said. Not his own, but somehow in his head. 'Sure ya woulda. Because you have his kind heart. Please stop making 'guni so sad, if you can help it. He really does love you, and he's the kinda person who needs to know that somebody loves him back.'  
  
'Jace?' he thought.  
  
'No Squall. You just want to think it's me because you hear that I was the type of person who always knew what was going on and how to make it better. But I'm dead. Understand? You and Laguna and Irvine and everyone, you'll have to be strong without my help. And you are strong, your heart is strong. Are you going to keep it locked up in there forever?'  
  
'Figures that I'd talk to myself in the voice of someone that I've never even met,' Squall thought, and he could swear he heard a woman's laughter riding on the wind and fading away.  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
okay, there's chapter six. Chapter seven will come soon. All the chars who are gonna play a substantial role are here now. I know, no Quistis. It's not that I dislike her, I just. . . didn't know what to do with her, really. She'll show up later, I guess, but sort of as a side note. Uh, guess that's all for now. Happy Haunting. ~Banshee Puppet~ 


	7. Chapter Seven

Hrm.didn't I say these chapters got longer? I think this is the shortest one yet! Ah well.  
  
Disclaimer and et cetera.  
  
Thanks to my reviewers. Anime-diva, I'm glad you liked Squall calling Laguna a moron. Writing it made me snicker a little too, so I'm glad I'm not the only one. As far as a possible Quistis/Seifer pairing, if the story unfolds in such a way that makes it feasible without throwing things totally off-sides, I'll consider it, though I actually think I may wait on any pairings for them until I write fanfics with their histories. See, I intend to do one for each char, over some long stretch of time. Irvine came to me first, and I have a rough idea for Selphie, so it's only a matter of time before Quis and Seif come along. As far as this fic goes though, maybe. It's not that they won't be in the fic at all, it's more that I think they'll have more minor roles for this one, coming in closer to the end, in the sections that I haven't written yet. Gyah! Rambling again. Slap me when I do that. . . Rieyu Orin, thanks for the support and the vote of confidence. I've managed my way through most of the game, except the last cd, so I guess I've got most of the basic storyline down, and I've read other fics so that helps too. I actually intended for this to be post-game stuff, primarily b/c I couldn't see it happening during or before(obviously), so it work out, but I don't guarantee that I won't accidentally au it later. Thanks for the offer to answer questions too, I may take you up on it if something comes up.  
  
Cherry and Amanda, thanks again for your support.  
  
So everyone can know how progress is coming, chapters will come slower after chapter fifteen, because that's how far I've written so far(the equivalent of 77 pages.told you it was long). I've decided, for the moment, to put most of my effort into this fic, since all I have to do for a little while is reformat it, but after that, I'm going to have to space out my time between this fic, "before there was you", "so this is love", and "a fragile heart". I know I SHOULD write one thing at a time but. . . uh. . .well, I don't.  
  
Well, enough ranting. R&R. Here's chapter seven.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Seven  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
Tears ran down Irvine's cheeks as he slept. When Squall entered, he couldn't help but notice. It made him cringe; seeing Irvine cry. And now there he was, Selphie all curled up in his arms as silent tears ran down a sleeping face that looked like it was in pain. 'He was in bad shape when we went up against Matron, the closest thing to a mother he can remember, but it was nothing compared to this. Of all the villages in the middle of nowhere to stumble upon, why did it have to be this one?' Squall wondered. He didn't like seeing his friends in pain, and though he thought, in the same situation, he would want to know everything too, he wished the situation had never come up, because his friend was suffering. Another thing to never mention out loud. He had his pride, after all, and so did Irvine. He wouldn't want to be reminded.  
  
Rinoa was fast asleep on the bed on the opposite wall and Zell was lying on the floor with his hands behind his head staring at the ceiling.  
  
"Rinoa told me you guys saw Laguna today," he whispered.  
  
Squall nodded briefly, leaning against the wall by the door with his arms across his chest, his expression stable and rather blank, careless, but not in the way Zell's expression was careless. Zell would show you exactly what he was thinking, carelessly, recklessly even, and he had a million different smiles. But Squall put on a careful mask that made him appear as if he didn't care about anything. His friends knew better than that, and Zell, for one, had learned to read what Squall was thinking in the tone of his voice. "He was paying his respects," Squall told him quietly.  
  
There was a long silence as Squall sat carefully on the edge of the bed where Rinoa slept and took off his boots, jacket and gloves. With only one small window, despite the chill night air, it was warm in here. He leaned forward, elbows on knees, head bowed in thought.  
  
"Do you believe in fate, Squall?" Zell asked finally.  
  
It was so strange to hear Zell's voice in a whisper. He was always so loud, you could never notice how gentle and young his voice really was.  
  
"I've never thought much about it," he answered. "I suppose. . .it's possible."  
  
"You don't find it a little strange that we stumbled across a village where Irvine lived with his mom, in the middle of nowhere, after being unexpectedly stranded in the desert, and that, on top of it all, your dad knew her really well and is now here.the president of Esthar, visiting a village that you wouldn't even know to look for, if you didn't already know it was here?"  
  
"Well.if you put it that way. I guess so. What's your point?"  
  
"There's gotta be some reason for it; that's all. I don't know what it is, but, there's a reason we're all here. Doesn't seem to really have anything to do with me, but maybe that's why I've been thinking about it. Maybe I'm here to be the one to think about weird things like that. I dunno, since I'm not really connected. I mean, you, Irvine, Laguna. . .and anything that concerns you and Irvine concerns Rinoa and Selphie. . .maybe I'm just here to make sure everyone's paying attention."  
  
"Or maybe you're just here for comic relief," Squall commented absently, then shook his head. Once in a while he would forget that he was supposed to be serious and come out with something like that. It surprised him as much as everyone else, really. "Go to sleep Zell, you're thinking too much. It was just a coincidence."  
  
"One hell of a coincidence," Zell said and rolled over, burying his head in his bicept. "G'night Squall."  
  
After a pause, Squall laid back on the bed. "Goodnight Zell." And damn if he didn't go to sleep wondering if Zell wasn't exactly right. All of them here, now. At the same place at the same time. It was almost unprecedented. But what were they supposed to discover? What were they supposed to figure out? And more importantly still, why did he care?  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
uh. . .dun dun dun!!!! What'll happen next? I'd give you a hint. . . but I don't remember. Reformatting is turning out to be great for my memory though! Hehe.  
  
Well, anyway, till next time,  
  
Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


	8. Chapter Eight

Another short one. Guess 7 and 8 could have been one chapter, but I like keeping them separate.  
  
Disclaimer: no owney, no suey. Bleh.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Eight  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
" 'guni wake up! Wake up! The circus is in town! Let's go, please!"  
  
'Huh? Where?' Squall recognized this feeling. The dream world. 'Ellone.why? You said you can't change the past.what is this about?'  
  
'I'm sorry Squall. I know we can't change the past, but we can still learn from it. Uncle Laguna is so sad. He never got over the death of his friend. If I can figure out why, maybe I can help him get past it.'  
  
'Someone he cared about died. That's all.'  
  
'Raine died too. He loved her more than anyone and he doesn't go into a month long depression every year because of it. I want to know. I need to know, really.'  
  
'Me too.'  
  
'Irvine?'  
  
'Yeah. This is the dream world, right. So you're Laguna again.'  
  
'Squall groaned mentally. That's right, I'm stuck inside my dad the moron's head.'  
  
'So then, who am I?'  
  
Squall focused on the scene to find Laguna looking blearily up at a seven year old girl with auburn hair, bright green eyes, and a misfit's smile.  
  
"Jace, it's hardly dawn," Laguna whined.  
  
"That's right! It's already dawn!" she said as she tugged him out of bed. "We're practically late already! I want to see everything!"  
  
'Mom.'  
  
Laguna, or the ten year old version of Laguna shook his head. "My head feels cramped," he complained.  
  
"Mine too! Don't worry. It's just the fairies."  
  
"Fairies?"  
  
"Uh huh. A fairy is an invisible little person. They're very mischievous and like to play tricks on you, but sometimes they help you out. They just like to play and have fun, but they'll help you out if you're nice to them."  
  
"Sounds like you."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
Laguna smiled at her impishly. "You're my favorite fairy Jace!" he laughed.  
  
"Stop being silly. I'm serious. Fairies are real. Mum and Dad told me so!"  
  
"Okay okay, so it's the fairies. Whatever," Laguna rolled his eyes.  
  
"Hurry Up! You're too slow!" Jace whined as Laguna hopped around trying to yank his pants on.  
  
"Stop complaining and find my other shoe," he told her, holding up the one that he seemed to be able to locate. "It looks like this, only for the other foot."  
  
"You're such a brat."  
  
"And you're a fairy."  
  
Squall blinked awake blearily trying to focus, he rolled his head over with a groan and saw Irvine blinking up at the ceiling. The others seemed to have left them to sleeping and were nowhere to be found.  
  
"Did she really have to take us THAT far back?" Squall commented dryly, trying to get rid of the funny feeling from being trapped in the body of his ten-year old father.  
  
"I don't mind," Irvine answered. "It was weird, but they were really cute. At least now we know who gave Laguna those ideas about fairies."  
  
Squall tossed himself up, throwing his feet over the side of the bed.  
  
"She's YOUR mother."  
  
"She was really energetic, huh?"  
  
"She was really bossy," Squall countered. "Where's my shoe?"  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
okay, wow, that WAS short! I think I'll have to upload three chapters this time instead of my usual two. Ah well. Next chapter I'll tell you where Squall's shoe is. . .and other stuff. 


	9. Chapter Nine

Okay, and here is the baby of all chapters! It's only one paragraph! What was I thinking with this one? Well, whatever, next one coming soon.  
  
Still don't own 'em.  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Nine  
  
~~~~~  
  
An hour later, Squall and Irvine were still looking for Squall's other shoe.  
  
"I don't get it. It's not as if the thing has very many places to hide," Irvine said scratching his head.  
  
Squall was starting to get a distinctive feeling of déjà vu, and with a sinking feeling, he said slowly, sitting on the edge of the bed with one boot on, "Irvine, where did Jace find Laguna's shoe, way back then?" Being in Laguna's head, he'd been under the bed digging through all sorts of crap at the time.  
  
"Behind the television, why?" then recognition of Squall's line of thinking crossed his face and he moved over to the set where they had been watching the videos only a day before. Sure enough. Irvine picked up the boot and tossed it to Squall. "Well, I'll be damned. That was weird."  
  
"There's no point thinking about it now. The others are probably downstairs," Squall said by way of dropping it.  
  
"And eating without us, no doubt. Let's get going then."  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
Okay, shoe found, and things are starting to get strange. Weird coincidence? Maybe, but I think not. Chapter ten is next. R&R.  
  
Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


	10. Chapter Ten

Disclaimer and etc. . .  
  
Whoa, here it is, finally, a longer chapter, a whole 17 pages this time. Hope you like it.  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Ten  
  
~~~~~  
  
Squall had forgotten. No one had gotten around to telling Irvine that Laguna was here, but he hadn't expected the cowboy to react the way he did. He knew he'd be mad, sure, but when Irvine saw Laguna and lunged violently for him, Squall was reacting on pure instinct when he tackled the cowboy.  
  
"Irvine. Calm down!" he pleaded. Even he could hear it in his voice. Irvine didn't like violence. Everyone knew he was angry, that he had every right to be, but that he might attack Laguna, the thought had never crossed his mind.  
  
"Get OFF!!!" Irvine hissed, struggling against Squall who had him pinned to the ground, barely. He nodded to Zell, bangs flopping a bit and a glare that said, 'get over here, I can't hold him like this forever.' And Zell was quick to comply.  
  
"Not until you relax. You've got every right to be pissed off but that doesn't mean I'm going to let you kill him. You think that's what SHE would want?" Squall snapped at him and Irvine went suddenly limp in their arms. Zell nearly tumbled forward at the sudden absence of strain, but Squall caught him with one hand and steadied him.  
  
Irvine sat up in an Indian position, hands clutched in fists on his knees and a deep scowl creasing lines in his brow and around his lips. "You didn't TELL me!" he accused. "Why didn't you tell me?" and suddenly all the anger was gone from his expression and he found himself crying again. Laguna recognized the emotion. It was grief.  
  
He looked sympathetically at the young man that he could remember running around with his mother's cowboy hat as such a small boy, always smiling, laughing. They were all so happy then.  
  
"I loved her too, you know," Laguna said softly, after a pause. "Above all else, she wanted you to be happy, even if it meant forgetting that she ever existed. She knew that knowing how she died would make you proud, probably, but also very sad, and maybe a little angry. It was hard not to say anything, but. . . I'm sorry Irvine, I was just trying to respect her wishes."  
  
"H-how she died? Nobody tells me anything. Why is there a statue dedicated to my mother in the center of town. Why is she a hero? What did she do? How DID she die, Laguna?"  
  
".it was my fault." Laguna said softly, shadow aging his face again, and a grief very different from Irvine's. Irvine who could cry because he wasn't there, and Laguna, who could cry because he was.  
  
"I'll tell you how she died, Irvine, and then you can decide what I deserve and I won't stop you. But let me tell you how she lived first. You're mother was the most amazing girl. Strong, and full of energy, and extremely willful. She made me want to be a better man, even when I was just a little boy. She was like a sister to me, and I really looked up to her. That's a little strange to say, since I was a bit older than she was, but it's true.  
  
"Her parents took me in not long after my mother died. My father had died a while before, and my step-father and I. . .well, to say we didn't get along is pretty much the understatement of the century. I really hated that guy. I even tried to kill him once. It was Jace who stopped me."  
  
Squall inadvertently found himself drawn into the story. 'Laguna's parents died when he was young.and he tried to kill his step- father? I can't picture that at all. Was Jace so important to who he grew up and became? Would I be like him now, if I had had a Jace?' he couldn't help but wonder.  
  
Laguna remembered. Sure, he remembered every detail. Even as he spoke, telling the story to the boys and their friends, it was like reliving a nightmare.  
  
He didn't know how his father died, just that it happened before he was born. And there never really turned out to be a right time to ask. He was five when his mother remarried. The man was a low-ranking soldier, stationed in Deling City. There weren't any wars going on at the time, so it was a pretty useless thing to do, it seemed, but other than that, he didn't really think about it. His name was Jarim Tayne. He was a tall man with a little bit of muscle and a certain unaccounted for charm that his mother had fallen for hook, line, and sinker. His mother never mentioned what Jarim did when he was away all night sometimes, but even a kid could figure it out when you find lipstick on a guy's collar that isn't his wife's shade, or when he walks in smelling like smoke and stale perfume. He didn't even try to hide it. Yeah, Laguna hated him almost from the beginning.  
  
"I guess she put up with it because she thought I should have a father figure, or something, but I'd have been a lot happier if it was just the two of us," he heard himself saying. "Anyway, I was nine when she died. It wasn't his fault, but I blamed him anyway. I hated him for a million reasons, but after that day that Jace and I went to the circus, I hated him most of all for not being there to save her."  
  
"Fire! Fire!" the screams were so loud that they made Laguna's ears bleed, and a sinking feeling rose in his chest. That fire was awfully close to his house. Waitaminute! That WAS his house!  
  
"My house!" he screeched. "Mom!"  
  
His feet pounded the pavement in panic and Jace was right beside him. "Mrs. Loire! Erm I mean, Mrs. Tayne! Mrs. Tayne!" she was calling.  
  
"You can't go in there," a particularly burly soldier told them.  
  
"But that's MY house! My mom's.where's my mom?!?" Laguna pleaded.  
  
The man looked sadly down at the boy as Jace tugged wordlessly on his sleeve. "'guni.look over there," she said, pointing.  
  
There was a body, covered in a sheet, and out from underneath the covering, one charred hand had tumbled off the gurney, the only recognizable thing to be seen the vague outline of a human hand, and a gold wedding band with a small opal at it's center. His mom's ring. The ring THAT MAN gave her.  
  
"I was only nine years old, but I knew death when I saw it," Laguna explained. "They went looking for Jarim the one place they knew he was most likely to be, the Galbadia Hotel with one of his girlfriends, and that's exactly where they found him. I stayed at Jace's house that night, but the next day Jarim and I took what of our belongings the fire didn't claim and moved into that same hotel. And even though I could tell he was sad that she died, every night he still came up to the room late smelling like alcohol and women. At first, I thought I was angry at him for not saving her from whatever in the house killed her, but after the investigation was done, I got to be angry at him for as good as killing her himself."  
  
"Hey Jace. Good to see you," Laguna said sadly. "I guess it's harder for you to come visit every day with me all the way out here now, huh? Your mom and dad don't let you take the buses alone and all."  
  
"Laguna, your mom. People are saying."  
  
"She committed suicide. Investigation closed yesterday. She set the house on fire herself. I guess that's why she was so glad we were gonna be at the circus all day. She was just waiting for an opportunity. She left me Jace. Why'd she leave me like that?" he sobbed.  
  
"It wasn't you. You're mom loved you a lot Laguna. She'll love you forever, even if she's dead. Wherever the dead go, she loves you there too. It was hard on her, living with THAT MAN though, I guess. Erm, Mister Tayne, that is."  
  
"She left me all alone," he sniffled.  
  
"You'll never be all alone, 'guna. You'll always have me. Don't forget. Okay. You'll always have me."  
  
"Until the end of eternity?"  
  
"unuh. Longer than that. We'll take care of each other. Forever. If you ever need anything, I want you to come to me, and I'll come to you if you need help too. You don't have to even ask. Just come and I'll know. I'll be your family now, Laguna."  
  
"Like a sister."  
  
"Yep. So don't cry anymore, okay. You should come over tomorrow if you can. Mum and Dad are making spaghetti and meatballs. Your favorite."  
  
"I will. That'd be good. I need to get out of here before I do something I regret."  
  
"I was still awake when he came in that night. It was also the first night that he brought one of his girlfriends into the room. I was so angry. He hadn't saved her, probably caused her death, and now he went around like he didn't even care. Something just. . . snapped. I grabbed his gunblade and lunged at him. . ."  
  
Squall was having a hard time registering this story. It just all seemed so unlike the Laguna he knew. Heck, it was even unlike the Laguna who he'd known in the dream world. He knew it was unfair of him to assume that was all there was of the man, but how could none of this ever come up. Was it so painful that he didn't even THINK about it if it could be helped? That didn't make any sense. Squall thought about painful things all the time. And besides that, even if Laguna could talk about himself and his dreams forever, there was something different about the story he was telling now. It was about him, sort of, but not in the same way. He was more thoughtful, more deliberate, a sad look on his face but one of concentration, he was being careful not to wander off the topic at hand. This was a story about someone else. He could only make Irvine understand Jace from the perspective of his own life; that's why things like his mother's death and his step-father's infidelity were important. Squall realized, Laguna hadn't meant to give away that side of himself, but it was. . .necessary. He had a lot to make up for.  
  
"I don't know why Jace didn't leave, but Jarim dodged easily. I didn't know how to handle the weapon, and it was too heavy for me. His girlfriend ran out screaming and Jace shoved her way into the room before the door could lock. . ."  
  
"Laguna don't!" she pleaded, horror etched on her features. "This isn't going to bring her back."  
  
"No, of course not! But it'll make me FEEL BETTER!!!" he hollered, taking another swing at his somewhat more than surprised step father.  
  
"For what? Like five seconds?"  
  
"I suppose I knew that she was right, but I still wanted to kill him. I was so angry back then. Of course, after having a gunblade swung at him about half a dozen times, Jarim sorta wanted to kill me too. And there was Jace, just an eight year old kid, trying to yank the two of us apart. I guess I must've gotten clocked pretty hard or something, because the next thing I remember, it was three o'clock in the afternoon and I was blinking up at a white ceiling, hearing little beeping noises, and that awful hospital smell, like formaldehyde and perfume. Sterilized death. Mom, at least, never had to deal with THAT smell." Laguna shook his head vaguely. It was obvious that he had no love of hospitals, but the reason for that was one that Squall couldn't understand.  
  
'There's something you aren't saying,' Squall thought. 'You have more secrets than I thought.' All the same, he had to at least respect Laguna for telling this story. He knew that thinking about Jace was painful for him, given what he'd seen last night, and what he'd "heard" from Ellone.  
  
"Anyway, Jace was sitting right there in the guest chair by the window, staring out, looking like she should've been to sleep hours ago when I woke up. I felt so dizzy."  
  
"He gave you a concussion," Jace said softly, turning her face towards Laguna and revealing a black eye so bad that it was nearly swollen shut and a small cut beside her eye.  
  
"You're eye."  
  
"It's no big deal. He was aiming for you. I just sorta.got in the way. He didn't hit me as hard as he coulda. Don't worry about it. It'll heal," she said.  
  
"You look tired."  
  
"I've been waiting for you to wake up.to tell you what happened while you were out. Not very good, journalistically speaking, ya know 'guni. You slept through most of the story."  
  
"Ha. Ha. You stayed all night?"  
  
Jace nodded. "I told you that I wasn't gonna leave you alone, didn't I? I made a promise. Anyway, mum and dad said you should come stay with us now. If you and Mister Tayne keep living together, someone's gonna end up dead. They're filling out papers and stuff now, I think. Mister Tayne seems to think it's the best thing too; after all, you did try to murder him last night. Hyne, Laguna, what were you thinking?"  
  
"I was just.I was so angry Jace. It was his fault. Because he didn't love her. Mom killed herself because he treated her so badly. I miss her is all. I was thinking, I miss her, and I guess I was thinking that it was his fault. And then he came in with that woman as if mom never existed at all. It was too much."  
  
"If it matters, I think he probably did love her, in his own way, you know. He had lots of girlfriends, still does, but, remember that she's the one he chose to marry. To do that he had to love her at least a little. Some people, I think, just aren't made for that settled, stationary kind of life. You shouldn't blame him. I can respect him for not sneaking around or trying to hide it at least. He lives life his own way. That doesn't make him right, but it makes him. . .I dunno. He's not right but. . .I don't think it's something he can help, like you couldn't help what you did last night, and like I can't help, you know. . .things. . .the way I am. Whatever the case, since you snapped like that, the doctors say you have to go to therapy for a while, and take some sort of medication to make you not homicidal anymore."  
  
"Am I really. . .am I a messed up kid, Jace? Do you think the doctors are right, that I need all that stuff?"  
  
"Naw. You're just 'guni. You always will be. And I'm just Jace. Still, you and I are kids, ya know, so it's not like we really have much say in anything anyway. All we have is our dreams. We can only hope that in the future, we'll grow up to be strong and kind and do the right things and all that stuff. So don't forget, no matter what they make you do now, you're still you, and you have big dreams, like traveling the world and being a journalist and all that. Don't forget your dream, no matter what, 'kay?"  
  
"I won't forget. What about you Jace? You never talk about yourself really. What's your dream?"  
  
"I. . ." she paused for a long time, as if trying to figure it out, or find the right words, minutes maybe. Laguna just waited; he knew better than to interrupt her when she was thinking. "I guess I want. . .to be like a knight. Not a knight exactly, but similar. I want to have something to protect, and to be strong enough to protect that special something. It's pretty silly, huh?"  
  
"But you already do all that. You protect me all the time."  
  
Jace shook her head. "No. We protect each other, Laguna. We always have. Always will."  
  
"You stayed tonight to protect me then? From what?"  
  
Jace nodded a bit, "Yourself, 'guna. These past few weeks, ever since your mom. . .you know. . .you've been so terrified of being alone. You go around acting like nobody cares about you. But I'm still here. I still care. You're not worthless or stupid like you seem to think. You do dumb stuff sometimes, but that's okay. Mistakes are just a part of living. That's what dad says. Sometimes taking the wrong road is the only way to find the right one. I guess it makes sense, in that weird way that my dad makes sense from time to time."  
  
"You're dad's a weird guy."  
  
"He wasn't always. Mum says a bomb went off too close to his head this one time, and he was never quite the same. But I'm pretty adamant about it all, and pretty stubborn. And I don't think he's any crazier than we are. He just thinks in a different way, like he came to close to death and never came all the way back. Anyway, you get used to him. Mum says that the way he is is the reason I'm the way I am. . .I don't know if that's true or not. I'm just pretty sick of everyone always making excuses for me."  
  
"I was in therapy for the next four years, and on "happy drugs" until I was sixteen," Laguna remembered a little too flippantly, scratching his head a bit in that way he always did when he was embarrassed to admit something, and with a small smile he added, "I guess the effects never really wore all the way off." He laughed, as if vainly trying to lighten the mood.  
  
'This isn't the way I imagined it, the way you lived,' Squall thought. 'I thought you were. . .happy and normal and just sort of dumb and goofy,' Squall thought. 'No wonder you get so sad around this time of year. Jace was all you had, wasn't she? Like sis was for me. I. . .I'm afraid to be alone too.'  
  
"Man, my throat's pretty dry. Can we take a little break and pick up later?" Laguna asked. He'd been talking for a few hours he realized suddenly, and needed something to drink pretty badly. "Ken, can you, ya know, some water?"  
  
"Sure thing 'guna. I'll make up some wings too. It's about lunch time," Kennedy said and poured a glass of water before heading into the kitchen.  
  
"Ken's a pretty great guy," Laguna commented absently. "Anything to help out when he can. All the people here are like that."  
  
They were silent for a long time, nobody really knew what they were supposed to say. They ate lunch quietly, with only the occasional joke about how Ma Dincht managed to raise Zell without ever getting around to teaching him table manners, or some other goofy comment, as if deliberately trying to lighten the mood. But finally, Irvine got up the nerve to ask the other question that had been plaguing him.  
  
"Laguna? Did you know my father?"  
  
This, apparently, was the wrong question. Laguna frowned deeply, his body shook a bit in anger and the glass in his hand smashed, cutting his palm. "Shit," he whispered. "Uh," he forced a smile. It looked so wrong and he hated being surrounded by the worried faces, just like back then. "Yeah, we. . .ah. . .we met a few times," Laguna said finally with that wide, fake grin. The fact that at the same time he was letting Kennedy clean and bandage him up with a first aid kit as if it was no big thing did nothing to keep up the illusion of happiness over the memory though. "Why don't you go upstairs and rest a while, 'guna? You look tired," Kennedy said, to which Laguna nodded weakly and said, "ah. . .well. . .yeah, I suppose that would be best," and got up, feeling the eyes on his back as he headed up the stairs.  
  
"We don't talk about him around here, Irvine. Especially not around Laguna," Kennedy explained as he swept the broken glass up into a dustpan. ". . .do you know the difference between love and possession?" Kennedy asked after a long pause.  
  
"Sure. . ." Irvine said, worry lines creasing his brow as a suspicion crossed his mind, one he hoped-prayed-wasn't true.  
  
"I'm glad, because your dad didn't."  
  
"He. . .he hurt mom?"  
  
Kennedy nodded. "And she wouldn't leave for a long time. Because in spite of everything, she loved him. Guess she saw something there that nobody else did. She seemed to be drawn in by people who were suffering, always wanted to help out, maybe that was it, who knows? But when you were born, she was afraid he would hurt you too. She had to make a choice, and she chose you. Anyway, it wasn't long after that that she ended up in Bella Maure. But I don't know the details. I guess Laguna does, but, like I said, we never talked about it much, especially not around him. Laguna. . .he's a really good guy. . .but there are some things he has pretty much zero tolerance for, and you're dad's always been one of those things. Last I heard, he was living in Deling City, but that was fifteen years ago. He might still be there, but 'guna can never know where he is. I think he can't get over losing Jace, not just because of not being able to save her from dying, but also not being able to save her from living. But there are some things that you have to save yourself from. That's what I believe." "You think too much," Irvine teased, hoping to rid them of the foul mood. "He was never supposed to be a fighter. That's why he ended up failing so badly," Squall said as if that was the end of the conversation. 'Laguna, my father, he wanted to be like her, but it was never the type of person he was supposed to be. So he ended up failing and screwing up pretty badly, because he ended up playing a role that was never meant for him. That guy. . .the military. . .what were they thinking, giving him a weapon? Dad, (the word felt strange, even without saying it out loud) stop trying to be her. Please. Don't you understand that you're destroying yourself?'  
  
"Unh!" Irvine groaned. "This feeling. . .Squall. . ."  
  
"N-not now, Ell. . ."  
  
'Where am I now?' Squall wondered, looking around. 'er, when, to be more specific.'  
  
Laguna shoved some hair from his eyes. It was raining and Squall got the distinctive feeling of worry. He stopped in front of the Galbadia Hotel and glanced in the window. The reflection of a drenched and helpless fourteen year old boy stared back. He was the only person on the streets in this weather. 'Jace, where are you? You're dad's been in the hospital for weeks now. He's dying. Do you even care? Why are you behaving so coldly? To live life with no regrets. . .that's what you said. I know that you're a person who's incapable of feeling any remorse, but you're father won't live through the night. He's been calling you. There's something he wants to say. He's not going to live out the night. Won't you regret not being there, even a little?'  
  
"Where are you, Jace?"  
  
Laguna wandered helplessly through the streets. He was tired, wet, and from the sudden shivering and sneezing, he was fairly certain that he had a cold. His hair was pasted to his skin, his toes were starting to get numb, but he kept looking. "I'll go get her," he'd promised the poor, dying man. "She isn't far." He lied, he had no idea where Jace was. He just knew she wasn't where she was needed. Wasn't her father's heart something special that needed her protection?  
  
'This looks like a fun place, so why this blank feeling? This empty void in my heart?' Irvine wondered. He was surrounded by people and loud music. Dancing he vaguely realized by the motion of his hips. . .with three different guys. . .at the same time. . . 'go mom!.Waitaminnit! Hey, get your dirty hands off my mom!' He noticed only vaguely that Jace didn't actually seem to mind at all, but that was beside the point. It was his mom, it was just. . .wrong to be here to witness this.  
  
Jace shook her head, "damn fairies," she mumbled. 'I don't need another conscience, I have Laguna for that. I just wanna have fun.'  
  
As if on cue, Laguna showed up, drenched in the doorway.  
  
"Speak of the devil," Jace said, groaning mentally before pointedly ignoring him and deciding that sucking face with the nearest of the three guys was much more fun than dealing with a scowling Laguna right now.  
  
But Laguna would have none of that. "Jace, I've been looking all over for you!" he said, putting his hand on her shoulder and all but yanking the two apart.  
  
"Have you? Well, now that you've found me you can go away," she said, not looking directly at him, but deliberately past him. Deliberate words. Words meant to hurt. And it hurt her to say them, but. . .he just didn't understand. Because he was a kind person, he couldn't understand.  
  
"You're father's been calling for you. We need to go to him."  
  
"I'm not going anywhere, Laguna," she said as she spun to glare at him, her dance partners having abandoned her already.  
  
"But Jace, he's dying."  
  
"You don't understand anything. You think I'm being cold. But I've decided, I'll look out for the living. A dead man like him is not my concern," she said. "So YOU go to him. My business with him is already finished."  
  
'So cold, what made you so cold?' Laguna, Squall and Irvine all wondered at the same time.  
  
"Please reconsider. Come with me. If you won't do it for him, then do it for me Jace. Come to the hospital," Laguna had resorted to shameless begging. 'For Hyne's sake, Jace, he's your father, he's dying, and he's asking for you. I hate begging, but if that's what it takes, so be it.'  
  
"Is there some great danger at the hospital that's waiting for you, Laguna, because if there isn't, it would be pointless for me to go there, and even more pointless for you to. If something there will cause you pain, then you needn't return to that place. If you're foolish enough to go after a direct warning like that, then you can't expect me to protect you from your own stupid whims. He'll die whether we're there or not. It can't be changed, so there's no reason to dwell on it. Go away. I want to have fun and you're being really boring. Why don't you go take some of your HAPPY PILLS 'guni. God, you make me so sick sometimes. They've got you in the palm of their hand. Come back when you get tired of being a puppet."  
  
Irvine blinked awake and found himself lying on the tavern floor, one step up from Squall, it seemed, who was rubbing his head from bearing a sudden impact with the tabletop and trying to shake the stars away from his eyes while he scowled. Rinoa couldn't help but giggle. Squall looked pretty funny when he woke up confused like that.  
  
Suddenly, Squall shivered, and sneezed.  
  
"It looks as if all is NOT happy in never never land," Irvine noted lightly.  
  
Squall nodded vaguely. "She was really cold. A-choo!!"  
  
Irvine nodded, remembering that Squall's shoe had been missing, just like Laguna's last time, and now the broody SeeD appeared to be sick. "I don't get it. It's like she wasn't even the same person everybody's been talking about. Can't say I'm feeling all too proud to be related at this particular moment. And what about you? You get colds from desert heat now?"  
  
"It won't do any good talking about things we don't understand," Squall interrupted as he unconsciously wrapped his arms around him to fend off the chill. 'So cold.' He was shivering.  
  
Kennedy scratched his head at the secret language that didn't seem to have anyone confused but him. "Ah, did I miss something?" he asked.  
  
Some looks were exchanged that said, this is an awfully complicated matter to try to explain, before Selphie says. "There's this dream world that we end up in from time to time where Squall is Laguna and he sees the past sort of, as it happens from inside Laguna's head. From the sound of things, this time, Irvine was Jace too. I didn't know Ellone knew Jace."  
  
"Well, they must've met somewhere along the way, whatever the case. It doesn't matter, it's not as if there's anything we can do about it. They had a fight, big deal," Squall said. 'It was just a fight.'  
  
"One helluva fight though Squally," Irvine commented, ducking because he was sure the first thing Squall could get his hands on would come flying in his direction at the abuse of his name. When it didn't and all he got was a deep scowl, he continued, explaining to the others. "The gist of it is, mom was out clubbing when her dad was dying in the hospital. When Laguna tried to come and get her, all about the sopping wet, she said some pretty harsh stuff and pretty much told him to get lost."  
  
"Then what happened?" Rinoa asked.  
  
"Dunno, that's when I woke up."  
  
"I went back to the hospital," Laguna said as he came down the stairs. "Without her." He was silent for a few moments as he sat back down at the table. "The day her father died. It wasn't long before my sixteenth birthday. Jace was fourteen at the time, and turning out to be a pretty troublesome teen. I didn't want to see anything bad happen to her, so we had quite a few fights throughout high school. I guess Ellone is curious too, huh?"  
  
Squall nodded. "We saw the day that your house burned down too. Last night."  
  
Laguna took it in stride. "Well, at least I know she cares, right?" he said with a smile. "Though it might've been easier for her to just ask. Ah well, I guess you want to know what happened after we fought in the club huh?"  
  
"Of course," Irvine said with his 'no duh' tone.  
  
Laguna chuckled a bit at this and then, thinking back, he said, "Well, like I said, I ended up going back to the hospital without her. . ."  
  
He clutched Laguna's wet hand tightly, feeling the shivering that went all the way through Laguna's body. The boy was sick. . .from trying to find his daughter no doubt. His vision was blurry, but he could at least tell that the boy was sopping wet.  
  
"You said she was right down the hall," he scolded.  
  
"I. . .ah. . ." Laguna stuttered. He knew he shouldn't have lied to Mr. Donovan, but wasn't it better than hurting his feelings?  
  
"You know. . .how I feel about lying, Laguna. You can't always make people do what you want, you know."  
  
"I'm sorry Mr. Donovan. I thought I could get her to. . .that is. . .I mean. . ." He was cold, his lips were chattering, he knew if his body was capable of it, he'd be sweating from the nervousness right now, but since it couldn't, his leg decided to cramp up. 'Ow, shit!' he thought.  
  
"She's not coming," the man said resignedly. "I didn't really expect her to, but I hoped. My daughter, she's very stubborn, isn't she? Just like her mum."  
  
Laguna nodded. "She's. . . um. . .Jace is special somehow. I'm not sure how yet, but, I just know that she'll be someone important one day."  
  
The man smiled weakly, he couldn't really see Laguna very well anymore, everything seemed very dark, but he could still feel the boy's hands shaking.  
  
"I know that too," he said, finding his voice was having a hard time coming out at a normal volume. "Tell Jace. . .those who are righteous must also be strong. Tell her. . .the path of the warrior is. . .the path to one's own death. To seek death at every moment. But also. . .that as long as a person lives. . .they're alive. Tell her I'm not angry. Tell her. . .I understand."  
  
But Laguna didn't understand. All Laguna understood is that he was watching a man die. And he couldn't believe that he'd ever wished death on anyone. This man had taken him in, and, in his own strange and sometimes less-than-ordinary way, raised him for five years. His heart felt like it was going to explode. He was leaving.  
  
"I. . .I'll tell her," he sniffled.  
  
"Laguna Loire. Whatever path you choose, make sure you live every day of your life," Mr. Donovan said. . . "and next time you go outside in the pouring rain. . . ..bring. . a jac.. .ket.. ...with. ...you."  
  
He couldn't speak anymore, his ears just vaguely registering Laguna's words of promise. But he knew, until the very last moment, he could feel the boy sitting there holding his hand. His wife had said her goodbyes before he had left for the hospital, and Jace hadn't come. He would have been fine with dying alone, but Laguna wouldn't have that. 'Such a kind boy. I won't worry about Jace and Maggie, now. Such a good boy. But Laguna, you have a lot to learn about. . .life.' And with that thought, Jace's father passed into another world.  
  
When Laguna woke up in a hospital bed, he saw Jace sitting by the window, staring out blankly.  
  
"Jace?"  
  
"Pneumonia," she said. "You're such a dumbass 'guni."  
  
"I thought you weren't coming."  
  
"I told you. I have no business with the dead. Mum told me you were here for a few days for observation because of that stunt you pulled last night, so I came to make sure you were okay."  
  
"Cold, but fine otherwise. Your dad wanted me to tell you. . ."  
  
Jace held up her hand for silence. "My dad is dead. He lived and died, like all people do. It doesn't matter. And don't you ever try to tell me again. He told me all I need to know with every breath, every step. He didn't need to put his lessons on life into words for me. You're the one who needs words, 'guna. You have a lot to learn yet, about living."  
  
"I was thinking last night."  
  
"Uhoh. That's always a bad sign," she teased.  
  
"I'm serious!"  
  
"For once." The frown she got in reply told her that it was time for her to be serious for a bit too, so she shrugged absently saying, "Alright. Shoot."  
  
"I thought I'd ask the doctors to take me off of my medication. I think I had a revelation last night. I've taken some things lightly that I shouldn't have, and some things seriously that I should have taken lightly. Do you think I'm ready for that?" Laguna asked seriously. "It's been five years. Will I be okay without them?"  
  
Jace just smiled. "No more meds for 'guni. I'd like that. I've missed you a lot. . .while you've been gone."  
  
"No more meds."  
  
"No more running away," she corrected.  
  
Understanding, finally, Laguna nodded and smiled as best he could. "No more running away," he agreed.  
  
"Jace was never mean just for the sake of being mean. If she behaved cruelly sometimes, it's because she thought that it was the only way to get her point across. To live a life with no regrets.that's what she wanted, but it got her into some trouble too," Laguna said thoughtfully.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
well, there's chapter ten. I'm noticing that I have a pattern of ending chapters of this story in something resembling mid-thought. I wonder why that is. . .  
  
On a side note, today I discovered coffee! I know I know! Twenty-two and never drank coffee before! I have decided that I have lived a very sheltered life. I don't actually like it so much, but I think it'll grow on me. The only downside is that the caffeine buzz wears off all of a sudden, and then you're just like. . . need more. . . need more now. And I know that there's absolutely no relevance to this rant at all, but I gone off on a good tangent in almost two days, so I thought it was about time. So-kay. No idea what happens in the next chapter since I don't remember. But hey! Uploaded four chapters tonight, yay progress. . . r&r pwease. Thankyee. 


	11. Chapter Eleven

Still don't own 'em.  
  
~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Eleven  
  
~~~~  
  
"Jacine Donovan! Get your high-falutin' tail back in this house right this instant!" Jace's mother yelled to no avail.  
  
The girl simply turned around, stuck out her tongue, and retreated from the scene more quickly.  
  
Mrs. Donovan knew well enough that if she pulled that "no daughter of mine" line that was so popular among parents of seventeen year old girls these days, Jace would just leave and never come back. And after the heated discussion of Jace's wardrobe and complete lack of responsibility they just had, her mother was pretty confident that Jace would stroll in in about two days wearing someone else's clothes as if nothing happened. The thing that bothered Jace's mother was that she usually strolled in wearing boys' clothing and her cowboy hat. Jace could be such a rebel. Deling city was hardly the wild west, but she walked around with pistols, which she swore up and down weren't loaded, and a cowboy hat like she was something out of an old movie. It wasn't the hat or pistols that bothered her mother though, it was the little tiny shirts, the mini-skirts, the fishnet stockings, the high rising boots. . .the general hooker look. And Laguna wasn't much happier about it. He didn't say anything about Jace's wardrobe, per say, but he had a tendency to look her up and down, arms across his chest, and scowl. She could dress however she wanted, he was more concerned with the places she was going dressed like that. Dingy clubs with barely any light, and she'd been going to them for years. It usually ended up one of two ways, Jace escaping Laguna's line of vision and him finding her in some guy's clothing an hour or so later, or Jace and Laguna fighting, her storming off, and having her come home in some guy's clothing two days later.  
  
Okay, so he worried. He wasn't much good at the whole big brother thing, especially since those clubs made him extremely nervous, and when he got nervous, his leg cramped up, and there wasn't really any room to work a cramp out of one's leg when you're packed in like a bunch of sardines, and the music was so loud it left his ears ringing and feeling rather fuzzy for hours after the fact, but he wasn't about to give up. He'd do his best to protect her whether she liked it or not, for as long as he could, anyway.  
  
She'd been so stubborn lately, and didn't want to hear anything, talk about anything, so he hadn't gotten the opportunity to tell her that he'd decided to join the military and would be leaving at the end of August. She'd think it was a stupid idea. But it wasn't as if they were at war at the moment, and he would get to see the world. If he explained to her that it was just one step closer to his dream, she would understand. But he'd have to get her to speak to him first.  
  
'She's so reckless,' Laguna thought as he looked at Mrs. Donovan and sighed. "Should I go?" he asked her.  
  
Mrs. Donovan hugged him. "You're such a good boy, Laguna. How am I going to get along here without you? Jace is just so reckless. I'm worried that one of these days she's going to come home pregnant and have no idea who the father is. I love her, but, I just don't know what to do."  
  
"I know Mrs. D. I'll go see what I can do. I want to talk to her anyway. She's pretty mad at me about that last time, but I think she knows that I just don't want to see her get hurt," he grabbed a denim jacket off the hook by the door and smiled as he slung it on, adding, "I really do hate those places though. They're so loud. They make me nervous."  
  
"Ah! I see, so they make your leg cramp up, do they?"  
  
Laguna blushed with embarrassment. "well. . .ah. . .a little," he admitted, bringing his hand up to his head and shoving some hair behind his ear as if the gesture would distract their attention from that obvious fact.  
  
"You know, it wouldn't bother you so much if you'd get a haircut, Laguna," Mrs. Donovan teased as he shoved his too long bangs away and they tumbled right back into his face.  
  
"Aw, I know, but if it gets a little longer, they'll stay back when I do that anyway. I kinda like it long."  
  
"A little secret?"  
  
"Mn?"  
  
"Me too," she winked then slapped his back slightly. "Now get going. Go rescue your little sister."  
  
"Yes maam!" Laguna saluted with a youthful grin and ran out the door.  
  
"That was the night that I realized, I'd been mistaken about Jace. . .at least to a point. It was the first night I saw her sing," Laguna remembered with the first real smile he'd worn since arriving in Bella Maure.  
  
"She was in the usual place, a little dive called Stained Glass. It seemed like such a ridiculous name for a club until Jace explained it to me. I guess I'd made fun of the name so much that she felt that I should understand the poetic significance. I still remember. . .she'd brought me into a large cathedral before dawn sat me in the back of the room where I could see sunrise through those windows. All those colors. It was the most amazing thing I'd ever seen, each color with it's own personality, all doing the same dance, and I thought. . .this is what the world is-a million different people, but they're all tied together in this cycle of living and dying. You can't see out of a stained glass window. Have you ever noticed that? But windows are made so that you can see, they're made to let the light in. A stained glass window though. . .it reflects a whole different world. The night I saw Jace sing in Stained Glass, I knew that there couldn't have been a better name for that club, not if they tried for a million years. . ."  
  
Laguna flipped the hair from his eyes for the millionth time as he entered the club. 'Maybe I should just get a haircut. Of course, that would make sense, and why should I start now?' he thought with some amount of disgust and amusement at the black strands tumbling back into his eyes with all their shaggy diffidence. But through them, he saw Jace. . .on stage. . .with a guitar. . .and she was. . .approaching the microphone. His first thought was, 'oh crap. This is bad. What sort of trouble has she gotten herself into now?'  
  
And then, she began to sing, and Laguna's jaw dropped. 'I had no idea . . .' but he couldn't form a full sentence, even in his thoughts. Her voice, combined with the electric whine of the shiny blue guitar she played. . .it was some sort of crazy magic for him. 'Voices like that have driven men into madness and death. A banshee, or a siren, but not a girl, there was no girl left in her when her voice rang out in this other world that she was opening up to him. Music. He'd never thought much about it actually. He supposed he liked it well enough, but after hearing someone singing the way that Jace sang, playing, the way that Jace played, with all of her heart, he understood how powerful a force a song could be. And he was more than willing to let himself drown in that force. Leaning against the back wall, he let his eyes drift closed, and smiled. 'You're going to be alright, aren't you Jace? Yeah, you'll be just fine. . .because you're so stubborn. And you. . .you've found something, haven't you? Something to live for.'  
  
When he opened his eyes, she saw him smirking at him, just for an instant before her gaze wandered elsewhere. But he knew, that simple instant, that tiny, barely there smirk that rose with the guitar riff, she'd just told him in no uncertain terms, 'we're okay, you and I. Let's forgive each other and go back to the way things were.'  
  
And with a grin that she never saw, he agreed.  
  
"Jace and Julia, they played the same way. Their music was all emotion," Laguna noticed absentmindedly before continuing his story. "Anyway, Jace sang a few songs I guess. I sorta lost track of time after a while. Everyone loved her, when she finally got off the stage, they were pretty upset about it. . ."  
  
Squall grabbed his temples, covering his eyes with the width of his hand.  
  
"Squall?" Laguna asked concern obvious on his tone. He wouldn't have been able to hide it if he tried.  
  
Squall groaned. Irvine clutched his head and said, "yer shittin' me. Now?" and both young men collapsed into sleep.  
  
"Squall!" Laguna leapt up. "Irvine! What happened to them?!?" he nearly shrieked as he leapt up and caught Squall just in time to prevent another head on collision with the table. He noticed only now, as he caught his son, that his skin was very cold to the touch. 'He's sick. It's just like him to not let anyone know.'  
  
"Looks like it's off to the dream world again," Zell commented absently, but Laguna was putting his hand to Squall's forehead and checking his temperature, so he only vaguely heard the reply. He lifted the boy in his arms. "He's sick," Laguna said finally. "I'm bringing him upstairs. Why don't you bring Irvine up too; dream world or no, a bed's got to be more comfortable than laying on the floor."  
  
Selphie chuckled a bit as she tried to help Zell lift Irvine off the floor, not that Zell really needed the help, but, heck, Irvine was HER boyfriend. Leave it to Laguna to think of something that silly, 'they're in someone else's consciousness in the past right now. . .probably yours. . .and you're worried if they're comfortable sleeping at the table. Sir Laguna can be so cute. . .in that, old enough to be my father, sorta way.'  
  
The dream world picked up just about where Laguna had left off, from what Squall could tell. First, all he could see was darkness, hear a voice and morbid guitar that seemed to flood out everything else. And ever so slowly, Laguna's eyes opened and it felt like he was seeing Jace, and Irvine, both at once, and both for the very first time. And Squall could swear they were crying without tears.  
  
She smiled at him, and then she picked up her song again, something about doing what's expected, and living, and dying for life, and he couldn't help but think this was an effigy, the memory her father left behind for her.  
  
*He was a cold, cruel demon with a vagrant smile  
And his eyes were sharp like diamonds  
In this rough and tumble world.  
I couldn't stay forever, daddy's little girl.  
  
Whispers in the dark never forget their names  
Whispers in the dark. Will it ever be the same  
As those distant days of mild dedication  
To your broken dreams?  
  
It seems. . .that we've been lying to ourselves  
  
And now that you're gone, I have a lot of promises to keep.*  
  
The words were vague, drowned out under the electricity and pure atomic sound of rock music, but they were there, just under the surface, and completely unnecessary for the purpose of the song. She could have strung together a million nonsense words for all the crowd cared, they thrived on the pure gusto of the emotion pouring out of her in a stream so strong it felt like she would die from it-so pure, so endless. Emotions that were so easily written on features, like water, molding to the touch, like Irvine, and yes, like the Laguna that Squall had grown to know, and who he was secretly fond of, though he'd never tell. But Laguna heard the words, and so, Squall heard them too. He had the opportunity to hear her as Laguna heard her, for the first time, and being there, being in the presence of her when she was like that was a million times what it could ever be on that tape that they'd watched the day before. Being there. . .it felt like his soul was breaking.  
  
Finally, she got off the stage, and Laguna pushed himself off of the wall and made his way through the uncomfortably tight crowd over to Jace. Jace was talking to a boy about her age, blondish hair and deep blue eyes, but turned when Laguna called her, "Jace!" he was a bit off to her right and had to yell to get her attention. They were packed in so tight that he was mere inches from her when he'd made it to her side. And she smiled up at him and said, "you liked my song," and she was smiling as if it meant everything in the world for her to have him there, watching, listening.  
  
Vaguely, Laguna noticed the blonde boy staring at him, scowling deeply, arms crossing his chest, but Jace was his primary concern just now. "It was great! You didn't tell me you sang," Laguna scolded, punching her jaw lightly, playfully. "When I saw you getting up there I thought you'd lost another bet or something," he laughed.  
  
"Nah. You don't hang around these places as often as I do without picking up a few tricks," Jace told him in an offhand sort of way. "Oh! Almost forgot. Introductions. Laguna Loire," she said, pointing to Laguna, and then gesturing toward the scowling blonde, she said "Max Kinneas. Laguna's my brother, Max," she said, by way of clarification.  
  
The two boys eyed each other warily for a moment, Laguna trying to figure out of Max was a friend or. . .something more. . .and Max trying to decide just how much he should trust Jace's assurance that a fairly good-looking guy who lived with her and didn't share any actual blood with her as far as he knew wasn't a danger to his territory.  
  
"Your brother huh? Then how come he's got a different last name?" Max asked finally, never taking his eyes off of the slightly older young man.  
  
"Well, not literally my brother. We grew up together, and he lives with me and mum, has since we were little," Jace offered her answer perhaps a bit too quickly and Laguna was getting suspicious. There was something about this guy he didn't like, something dangerous in his eyes, but he wasn't going to say anything. "It's a long story. Tell you about it later?" she offered.  
  
"Hn," Max nodded.  
  
"Jace, can I steal you for a few?" Laguna asked finally. "There's something I've been meaning to tell you. We haven't had much chance to talk lately ('because we haven't been on speaking terms'), and it's sorta important."  
  
She looked warily at Max and then said, "sure 'guni. Just for a bit though, kay?"  
  
This feeling, Irvine couldn't quite place what it was. Jace only voiced half of what she thought, and never seemed to bother much putting words to the rest. Her mind was just a pure bundle of emotion and it had been hard at first for Irvine to try and understand what she was thinking. Her earlier escape had been obstinance, pure stubborn condescension and the desire to do as she pleased. On the stage, there were so many emotions it felt like being drunk and drowning in that drunkenness, and he liked it. But now, this was something else, something that made her chest ache. Love, a bit, and. . .worry. But why would talking to her big brother make her worry?  
  
They stood outside the club, Laguna leaned against the wall and shoved his hair back from his face. For a moment, Irvine saw Squall in that profile, just an instant. He knew Squall was in there, but. . .this was Laguna. He'd been in Jace enough times to know he didn't have any control over what happened. He was just a witness. But he wondered if Squall ever saw just a hint of him in the girl who's body he was now. . .visiting. He was almost grateful that Ellone was giving him this chance, whatever her reasons. He could have spent a lifetime with this woman and not know her so well as he knew her now, never have learned so much about her, what she thought, how she felt. . .like the foam of a wave breaking on the beach, over and over again, or like the beach, with the waves breaking on it, over and over again. A woman who was like the surf of the sea, so tranquil, and so violent. That was a thing that you could know a person for a thousand years and never understand, and he knew it, he could feel it.  
  
Jace leaned against the wall beside him, wrapping her arms around her torso vaguely. "So," Laguna said finally, finding it hard to tell her this. . .this thing.  
  
"So," she stated with just a hint of a smile in her voice.  
  
"I. . .I'm going to be going away soon. That's what I've wanted to tell you. I enlisted in the military a little while back," he told her.  
  
Her heart sank, 'he's leaving? He's leaving!' her mind shouted. 'No. Can't be. . .'guni. . .but, our promise. . .' Her insides were torn apart, but after just a brief falter of the expression, she put on a casual face and said, "why?" so softly that Laguna knew, he'd hurt her.  
  
"I. . .you told me that I should do what I thought I needed to do to achieve my dream," Laguna said meekly. "We aren't at war right now, and I'll get to see the world. I'm nineteen, you know, should I stay in Deling City forever?" he mused softly. "I'm going to miss you, Jace. But. . .I feel like. . .I need to DO something. Have you ever felt like that? Like you're just sitting still, going nowhere. It doesn't have to be anything big, but, I think. . .it's time. Haven't you ever felt that way?"  
  
'No,' her mind said, but also there was a hint of understanding there. 'Live every day of your life, 'guni. Every single day until the very end. If this is what you want, I won't stop you. I have no right to stop you. I won't even say that I need you, not once. I'll be strong.'  
  
"How long?"  
  
"Two months."  
  
"A lot can happen in two months, you figure. Huh?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Well, that's cool. I'm sure you'll have lots of fun! Don't you dare forget me though. I'll never forgive you if you do!" she said with a happy joviality that her heart couldn't replicate. Her mind just kept hitting her with the realization. 'He's leaving, he's leaving. . .he's going away.'  
  
"Not a chance! You're my favorite person in the whole world Jace, you know that. You always will be," Laguna grinned down at her, pushing himself off the wall only a moment before she did.  
  
Looking into his eyes, she said, "I'm gonna miss you, 'guni."  
  
"I'm gonna miss you too. I'll write all the time though, just you watch. And you'd better write back!"  
  
Unable to take it anymore, Jace wrapped her arms around Laguna and buried her head in his shoulder. 'He won't see me cry. If he doesn't see it, it's like it didn't happen, right?' Just a single tear, insignificant really, but he wrapped his arms around her and said. "We're gonna be okay, Jace. Forever, remember? We promised forever. Anyway, it's late, or, early, or whatever. . .wanna go home now?"  
  
"Ah, I'll be home tomorrow or the day after. I promised Max I'd spend some time. . .ya know, so. . .since I don't have to worry about school this weekend, I sorta figured. . ." she rubbed the back of her head in a very Laguna-like fashion, a little embarrassed.  
  
"So that guy's your boyfriend, huh?"  
  
"Yeah, we've been going out for a while."  
  
'Great, that creepy guy is her boyfriend. What am I supposed to say to that? I'm not happy about it. . .'  
  
"Well, you know, it's none of my business. . ." he started to say, and Jace's cocked eyebrow, hand on her left hip said she agreed completely, it WAS none of his business. "Just. . .ya know, be careful, okay?"  
  
"You don't like him," she smirked, knowing Laguna all too well.  
  
"He's got the eyes of a demon," Laguna said half-heartedly. "He's probably a good guy though. I'm just, ya know. . .being the big brother, I guess."  
  
"Well, don't worry. You know I'm plenty strong enough to take care of myself."  
  
"Yeah, you're right. I shouldn't think about that stuff. I'm just not gonna be around to watch your back anymore, is all, so I guess I want to make sure everything's okay before I go."  
  
"Two months is a long time 'guni. Let's not say our goodbyes just yet. Tell mom not to worry. I'm not mad. But I make my own choices. Always have. Always will."  
  
So Laguna walked home alone again. 'I seem to be doing this a lot lately,' he thought to himself. And in fact, Squall had been starting to notice a trend at this point too.  
  
He'd been walking along absently, brushing hair from his face, when a young man, about sixteen or so stopped him. Laguna looked up, rather flustered. "Huh?" he asked, knowing the teen had asked a question, but for the life of him having no clue what it was.  
  
"You look like a card player. Wanna play some triple triad with me?"  
  
"You're challenging me to a card game? At. . ." Laguna looked at his watch. "Three a.m."  
  
"If you don't wanna, it's cool," the boy said.  
  
"Nah," Laguna grinned in that haphazard way that he had. "Just one game though, I gotta get home. Prepare to get your ass whooped. I'm great at this game," he said happily, glad to have the momentary distraction from his thoughts as he pulled a considerable deck out of the breast pocket of his denim jacket and selected the cards he'd play with, stashing the rest back in their place. "Ready when you are," he said.  
  
Jace was heading back into the club when she met Max in the doorway, and he didn't look happy. "I've had it for the night. Let's get out of here," he said.  
  
Nervous tension rippled down Jace's back, and she nodded dumbly as she tried to get the fairy in her head to stop yammering. It's not as if she knew what it was saying anyway, but as far as she was concerned, it had been babbling nonstop for the past hour, giving only the shortest break of maybe ten minutes as she talked with Laguna.  
  
Laguna whistled absently as he walked home, flipping the Leviathan card over in his fingers. He did enjoy a good card game, from time to time, and it had been too long since he'd played. Jace was pretty terrible at it, so he didn't even have her to fall back on for this at least, and all his card buddies had sort of fell off in their own directions after graduation. That left the random stranger challengings, and they didn't come all too often.  
  
He smirked at the card and tucked it into his pocket with the others, entering the house quietly and hanging the jacket by the door in the dark to try not to disturb Mrs. Donovan, who he knew was probably asleep on the couch after a valiant attempt at waiting up.  
  
But his attempts at quiet were nearly in vain when he stubbed his toe on the stairs and took a minor spill, just barely catching himself in time. 'Phew!'  
  
Squall sighed. 'Now THAT'S the Laguna I know,' he thought. 'Was beginning to wonder for a little while there.'  
  
Laguna shook his head, trying to clear it of all the rampant thoughts, cobwebs, and fairies, and doing no good on any of the above, ended up sitting in a dark kitchen with a cup of orange juice for about ten minutes before heading upstairs and going to sleep.  
  
Slowly, and with great caution, Squall blinked awake. . .and tried to figure out where the hell he was. Lying on his back. . .the room? When he turned his head in the direction Irvine had once been, he saw the open window to his left, and when he turned it the other way, he saw Laguna's profile, slight creases around the eyes, but still looking pretty young and fit, for being the father of a seventeen year old, staring out the window.  
  
When he heard Squall move, he looked at him.  
  
"Better now?" he asked.  
  
Squall nodded vaguely. "What. . .?"  
  
"Your head almost collided with the tabletop. I. . .ah. . .well. . ." there was the hand, coming up to his head the way it always did when he was at a loss for words. "was. . .that is. . ."  
  
"If you say worried after I went through time compression and back again, I swear I'm going to belt you one," Squall said, not knowing why he had the sudden urge to tease the older man as he slowly forced himself to sit up.  
  
". . .concerned," Laguna pouted a bit, and Squall had to fight to keep his stoic expression. "I thought. . .you know. . .you might be more comfortable here, anyway." He turned his head to the other side of the room with a small nod. "Irvine is still out. He must have hit the floor pretty hard; his cheek is bruised," he noted thoughtfully, not having noticed it before, but figuring it was just absentmindedness on his part. He was pretty well known for that.  
  
Max was mad, really mad. And jealous. He was jealous of Laguna, for heavens sake! Who in their right mind could EVER be jealous of a harmless guy like Laguna Loire? Jace just figured it meant he cared. And she had to admit, it felt a little good, being noticed by Max. But it wasn't really the ideal relationship and she knew it. She liked Max, loved him, even, but he was a little. . .possessive.  
  
"YOU THINK YOU CAN GO BEHIND MY BACK LIKE THAT!?! YOU THINK I DIDN'T SEE YOU? IN HIS ARMS LIKE THAT!!!" he hollered at her, dragging her after him, fingers clutched tightly around her arm.  
  
"Ow. Hey, Max, it's not what you think. . .come on. Let go. You're hurting me," she near whimpered. She knew it would be easy enough to fight back, to knock him on his ass, or just whack him over the head with one of her pistols and leave him stranded and unconscious. . .but it was Max. She just couldn't bring herself to fight back when it was him.  
  
"IT'S NO MORE THAN YOU DESERVE!" he yelled again, bringing the other hand around and slapping her hard, across the cheek. "YOU'RE MINE, JACE! MINE! AND THEN YOU GO CRYING IN THE ARMS OF SOME OTHER GUY! I WON'T STAND FOR IT! I told you before. You belong to me now, FOREVER, whether you like it or not."  
  
"I. . .I'm sorry. . .but, he's my brother."  
  
"No. He's not. He's some guy who happens to live in the same house as you. I've made up my mind. You won't be going back there anymore."  
  
"It's not so easy. . ."  
  
"Sure it is. We'll get married and you'll live with me, where I can keep my eyes on you."  
  
Irvine shuddered awake, bringing a hand up to rub what he found was a rather tender jaw. His arm, he figured, would probably be the same if he touched it, so he didn't, but he could feel the tenderness of the flesh brushing against his jacket.  
  
Suddenly, vaguely, he realized he was sitting on a bed, Selphie looking at him with concern. Squall was sitting on the other bed, Laguna standing, pacing. He realized suddenly that Squall didn't look too dazed. They hadn't woken up at the same time this time around.  
  
"Squall?" he asked.  
  
In response, Squall reached into the breast pocket of his jacket, which he rarely ever used and pulled out the Leviathan card, he hadn't known it would be there, but had expected that it would, and he'd been right. "You'd better tell me," he replied.  
  
"He. . .was really mad," Irvine said softly, fighting to keep his composure. He just wanted to go back into the past and rip the guy's throat out. It occurred to him that Laguna was probably thinking the same thing as the older man's arms crossed his chest and he scowled deeply, lines creasing his brow.  
  
Squall looked down at the card and at Irvine's bruised cheek. "I feel like I'm raping the past," he said slowly. "And I have a feeling we've still got a ways to go."  
  
"Can't turn back now," Irvine said, more gravely than was his customary way of dealing with things. "And I want to know, I need to, really. At this point, I'm not sure just being told will be enough." 'But being there and not being able to do anything, not being able to stop it. It hurts like a tonberry knife. It hurts SO much,' was the unspoken thought in his eyes. Squall just nodded. Being inside Laguna's head, he couldn't help but be pretty fond of Jace; and also, he'd been in the same place she had, at the end. One difference, only one. . .he'd gotten to come back. And thinking about that, he wondered, just for a fraction of a moment, if maybe she was the lucky one. At the feel of Rinoa's hand on his shoulder, though, he knew that wasn't really the truth at all. "I'm fine," he whispered, for her ears only, as he tucked the card back into his pocket.  
  
"You're a bad liar," she whispered back as discreetly as possible, considering, well, this WAS Rinoa that we're talking about here. 'She's about as discreet as a ten ton anvil,' Squall thought, smirking inwardly. 'And damned if I don't love her for it.' Another one for the list of things to never say aloud.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
kay, chapter eleven down. R&R, etc. 


	12. chapter twelve

Disclaimer: Don't own it, just love it. And that will continue to apply until the end of eternity, and longer even. . .  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Twelve  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Seems Jace's old room is all full up these days," Kennedy told Laguna. "So I've arranged somewhere else for you to stay, if you don't mind."  
  
"Where?"  
  
"With Aurin and Ella. Since Thomas built that little house on the other side of the lake to raise his family up in, his room's been empty. I imagine it still has that same tiny bed in it, not really appropriate for the President of Esthar, I imagine, but we're pretty simple folk, around here."  
  
"That'd be nice," Laguna said. "I haven't gotten to talk to those two in a long time. I used to play cards with Aurin all the time, when I was here. Maybe he'll take me up on a game."  
  
Kennedy laughed slightly. "You haven't changed much 'guni. A little older, a little sadder maybe, but damned if you aren't just the same elsewise."  
  
"Nearly twenty years have passed since I was last in this little village. I've stumbled across a few others in my travels. Most of where I ended up was sheer accident, or luck, but it's been a pretty good life so far. I got the chance to fall in love with two amazing women, married one. Lost her, but, she's still with me, here, and in my son's eyes," Laguna commented. "Raine. I miss her a lot, but I'm doing my best."  
  
Squall didn't mean to overhear, he just happened to be padding down the steps barefoot to find the bathroom and stopped, almost holding his breath as Laguna and Kennedy spoke. He shouldn't be spying, he knew. . .but he didn't want to interrupt either. Something just froze him there.  
  
"You know, Jace is still there too, in your heart. . .just like that wife of yours is. Maybe coming back is what you need to remind you of that. But why in heavens' name did you wait so long?" Kennedy reminded him.  
  
Laguna shrugged. "You're right, of course, and I suppose I know, but it's always been a little different. Because Raine, she left some things behind for me. She gave me a son. Squall. She left me, but at least, she gave me Squall."  
  
"What about Irvine?"  
  
"She didn't leave him for me to take care of. She brought him to that orphanage in Centra, remember? Besides, as much as I might love the boy, he isn't mine. He's like a fragment of some dream of her. I can't even look at Irvine without thinking of Jace. Am I supposed to be Uncle 'guni to him again, even knowing that? It wouldn't be fair to him. Besides, he doesn't need me. None of them do. I've been feeling so old lately, Ken. Really old. And alone. Shit. All this time and I'm still afraid to be alone. . .such a coward. I've always been such a damn coward."  
  
Memories flooded through Squall. His own, and the borrowed memories of Laguna. 'A coward? That's the one thing I never said. A coward wouldn't have jumped off a cliff like you did, wouldn't have fallen in love. . .twice. People love you because you're so passionate, because you feel things and aren't afraid to express those feelings. A coward?'  
  
"No!" he found himself snapping at the man before he'd realized the word came out of his mouth. His own voice echoed in his head. One simply syllable, and it sounded so angry. His arm flailed as he said it. There was emotion in it, repressed so long that one word blurted out thoughtlessly became explosive.  
  
"Squall?" Laguna blinked up at him, putting down the beer he'd been slowly nursing for hours now and standing to look at the boy. "No what?" he asked gently.  
  
'If anyone's a coward, it's me. Because I'm afraid to be alone too, but I'm also afraid to admit it, or anything. I'm the coward because I'm afraid to feel and get close to people. Especially you. But I want to. Heavens, I want to. Dad. My heart hurts dad.' Squall surprised himself with his own thoughts. Is that really what he felt, what he wanted? And he knew it was true, it was what he wanted, more than anything else. He wanted to open up, he wanted to collapse in his father's arms and feel warm and safe and at home there. But he was Squall Leonheart and that was too much to hope for. His body stiffened.  
  
"It's okay. Whatever it is," Laguna said when he noticed Squall shutting down again, putting on his impassive face once more. "No what?" he prodded gently, confusion evident on his face.  
  
"You're not a coward," Squall spit out abruptly, turning his head away as he spoke, unable to bring himself to look into Laguna's green eyes, showing so much emotion and pain right now, the older man completely unable to hide or conceal it.  
  
Squall just stood like that for a moment, tension radiating off of him and searing the air around him it seemed. He couldn't decide whether to retreat back upstairs to the bedroom or not. . .he really had to take a piss, but to do that, he had to go DIRECTLY past Laguna, and he wasn't sure he wanted to do that right now. He didn't actually trust himself to with his mind reeling the way it was. Annoyance. Anger. Need. Love. He wanted to go on hating Laguna for accidentally abandoning him, but the man was in so much pain, so alone. . .he was starting to see himself in Laguna, and he didn't like what he was seeing. He much preferred the idle banter and goofy grin to the sad retrospective brooding and the worried thought- creases on his father's brow. And why was it, now, all of a sudden, that, in his head, it was becoming more and more frequent "father" and "dad" replacing "Laguna" and "that moron"? Squall didn't understand it, but he figured it had something to do with this sadness that he hated so much because it was so similar to his own. Or maybe, finally, Ellone's gift had done something right, and given him a connection to the man that couldn't be broken. Maybe going into his mind and already knowing him, who he was, who he is, is different than drifting aimlessly through the mind of a stranger. Before Squall knew it, he was brooding again. He wasn't sure when it happened, but he knew it was sort of useless because brooding didn't stop his need to pee, so finally, he moved down the stairs and passed Laguna silently on his way to the bathroom.  
  
"I think that boy might be coming around," Kennedy whispered to Laguna, who was vaguely watching the back of that tossled head of hair as Squall rounded the corner, utter disbelief and hope etched into his features. "If you're right, Ken, then I think I'm going to have to thank that girlfriend of his," Laguna turned to the man with a carefree smile and shrugged. "It'd be nice though, if he did," he said softly, a bit embarrassed over the entire affair.  
  
Squall stayed in the bathroom longer than he had to. Why? Well, firstly, because Laguna was still out there and would undoubtedly want him to explain himself almost the moment he opened the bathroom door, if he remained true to form, when he wasn't even sure he could explain himself to himself just yet, and secondly, the bathroom was much more private than the tavern lounge or the upstairs room and thus appeared to be the perfect place for brooding at this particular moment.  
  
*"You poor, poor boy. What has this damaged world done to you?"  
  
He could hear a voice, not Ellone's, in his head, familiar, but he was sure he'd never heard it.  
  
*"Who's there?" his mind asked tentatively.  
  
*"Go to him. Just swallow your pride and go."  
  
*"No. . .I. . .can't. Not yet."  
  
The voice was silent, just heaving a slight sigh and he blinked, vaguely seeing a shadow illuminated by the sink. A figure sitting there, but in the light, he couldn't make it out. Just the positioning, hands on the edge of the little platform, sitting up on the formica top, legs hanging, swinging forwards and backwards slowly, absently, but also with some vague longing.  
  
"Who.?" he tried to ask again as he stood, then he heard a laughing voice, soft and warm laughter, ringing out on the air. The rocking figure stopped, looking up at another, who he could vaguely notice on the far wall, a colored outline, not like the other. Slightly more distinct. Blue for the legs and arms, shoulders, a paler color elsewhere, browns and tans. . .  
  
*"You shouldn't be here. Your story has already been written, completed," she told the other. "It's time for you to move on."  
  
*"This coming from you," the other scoffed. But the second voice he definitely recognized. It was Jace, but he couldn't quite make her out either, so he flipped off the light switch. . .and recognized both almost instantly.  
  
The one sitting on the counter wore a white sweater and pale blue jeans, long hair held back in a neat headband. 'Raine. Mother,' Squall thought, and the woman turned a smile on him.  
  
*"Hello Squall. Look at you. All grown up already."  
  
*"That's enough, Raine. Go back before the others find out that you're here. You're dead. When will you finally accept that? There's nothing more for you to do."  
  
Squall's gaze shifted over to Jace, and he gasped, startled, the left sleeve of her jacket was shredded, and there was blood, so much blood. He couldn't be sure whether or not it was all hers. 'Does the body even have that much blood in it?' Of course it does. It was as if she'd been frozen into the moment of her death somehow, but her expression was calm, she didn't seem to notice that she was covered in blood. Or was that only what he saw? It didn't seem to disturb Raine at all either.  
  
*"You're dead too, you know," Raine argued bitterly.  
  
*"Unfortunatley, they won't let it be that simple, in my particular case. The dead can't pass until the living are willing to say goodbye to them. You taught me that yourself, or have you forgotten already? Did you see that damnable statue in the square!?! I'm gonna be stuck in the in between place forever if I don't do something about it. I'm tired. I want to close my eyes and, finally, die all the way. Look at yourself Raine, you're vague, just a spirit or some sort of mixture of light and shadow. You still look like you, but there's no color, only black and white and gray. But I'm still a ghost. I liked my crazy life, for all it was worth, you know I did, but it's over now, and I want to rest, or be reborn, or whatever it is that comes after this pointless wandering around. I want to have a voice again, a real voice. To sing, and to fight."  
  
Squall noticed then that he'd been watching the entire conversation but neither of them ever moved their lips, not once, it was all thought, raw and blank-seeming, almost unreal.  
  
*"Mother. It's okay. We'll be fine without you. We always miss you, but. . .it's okay."  
  
*"Go to him Squall. Please?" Raine pleaded one last time.  
  
"I will, mom, I promise. When I'm ready," he said aloud, and with a smile, Raine faded, and he turned to find Jace, never having acknowledged him, had already disappeared as well, but he could hear it, that familiar laughter riding on the wind. And he knew now, was certain, it was her. Jace, and she was stuck somehow, her soul trapped between living and dying, because they couldn't let her go. And he was certain then, that he and Irvine would have to see this story through to the very end, for her sake, even if it killed them. Because she was sad, and because she was wandering, and because, he felt it. . .she was alone. The conversation with Raine had seemed somehow incomplete, like something was lacking, some sort of expression, some sort of. . .humanity. And he knew, what he'd seen. . .it wasn't them. It wasn't Raine and Jace. . .it was just their lingering echo. He knew because they. . .because they were already gone, and this knowledge forced the tears from his eyes.  
  
For the first time in as long as he could remember, Squall was crying, and it felt good. Vaguely, he heard a voice saying, "just go ahead and cry, it's okay. It's okay, Squall." And he thought that it was one of those echoes again, but he knew this voice too, and this person. . .this person wasn't dead yet. Laguna.  
  
Abruptly, Squall became aware of his surroundings and stiffened. He was kneeling on the bathroom floor sobbing into a warm embrace, feeling the hot breath on his ear that accompanied the soothing words as one hand rested on the back of his head, gently, and the other rubbed soothing circles over his lower back. "Shhh. s'okay. Just go ahead and cry if you've got to. It's okay. I'm here for as long as you want me to be." His arms were wrapped tightly around Laguna's waist, and he realized, from his positioning, that Laguna must be on the floor with him. Was anyone else here? Gods, please don't let anyone else be here. It was so good, to just be here like this, so warm and comforting. He didn't really want to let go yet, but his tears were already drying up, and he wouldn't stay there longer than it took to pull himself together. He just couldn't do that, not yet. He was ashamed enough of falling into his father's embrace so easily, without ever noticing, and feeling so naturally comfortable there.  
  
Tentatively, he looked up. Tear-streaked cheeks ran into long strands of black hair, as he sniffled, fighting off the last bit of his momentary hysteria. They were alone. The door was closed and Laguna was stretched awkwardly with one foot pressed against its base to see that it stayed that way.  
  
"Feeling better?" Laguna asked at the silence and motion, surprised, a bit that Squall had not yet pulled away.  
  
Squall nodded, head still half-pillowed against Laguna's chest, but let go and sat back on his heels, wiping his eyes with a little bit of embarrassment.  
  
"What are you doing in here?" Squall asked, his voice sounding dry and broken to him.  
  
"You were in here a while. I guess I was a little worried, and then I heard you crying. . ." Laguna paused, not sure if that was really an answer to the question, and blushed a little, but Squall nodded. He seemed to think it was good enough at least. Laguna adjusted himself to a position where he was sitting against the door, grumbling slightly at the dead sleep in his right calf as he moved his leg.  
  
It was all Squall could do not to laugh. Laguna's leg had cramped up. . .again. Not for the usual reasons, but still. . .it was just so. . .typical.  
  
"I know you probably don't want to talk about it," Laguna said softly. "But if you change your mind, I'm here. You should know that."  
  
"I know," Squall answered as he sat down on the floor beneath the tiny window, looking up through the cracks in the broken blinds at the honeyed moon. Finally, once he trusted his voice, he looked back at Laguna again, who appeared to be drifting off against the door, struggling through a battle with his body and the need for sleep, and obviously losing. The corner of Squall's lips peeked up briefly before he turned serious.  
  
"Father?" he asked slowly, testing the word out on his lips as if to see how it felt there, but paused, not seeming to much care for it and trying something else. "Dad?" He paused again, thinking about the way that felt when he said it, and then, with a brief nod that seemed to be some mix between decision and approval as the older man stared at him in sleepy awe, smiling and trying his best not to look goofy, despite the fact that he can't recall how long he's waited to be called either by his son. Squall noticed the expression. 'It means so much to him. I didn't think it meant so much,' he thought before returning to his line of thought and the question he had to ask. "Dad, why were you able to say goodbye to Raine. . .um. . .mom, that is, but you couldn't say goodbye to Jace?"  
  
Laguna's expression turned sad again, his head dropping, eyes staring at his hands as if there was something on them that only he could see, and he answered.  
  
"I loved your mother very much, Squall. I'm pretty sure I always will, actually. But I went to save Ellone, and I know that's she wouldn't have had me do anything else. I didn't get to be there when you were born, or when she died, and that made me really sad, but it never made me feel guilty. I know that Raine's death wasn't my fault. But Jace died because of choices I made, things I had no right to ask of anyone, not even her. Gods, ESPECIALLY not her. How do you say goodbye to a person who died in your place? It should have been me. Do you understand? I'm probably not making any sense again."  
  
'He could have just said 'because I blame myself for Jace's death,' but it's just like him to get his explanation all confused by using too many words,' Squall thought.  
  
Tentatively, testing impulse and logic a second time, Squall moved to Laguna's side , resting elbows on knees and said, "I don't know what happened, but I think I know Jace well enough now to know she does things her own way and makes her own choices. So just. . . quit blaming yourself. Just because people always want to help you doesn't mean that it's your fault when things go wrong," Squall said, surprised to find so many words come out of his mouth at once. He'd intended to just say, 'you should go get some sleep,' but, lo and behold, not what he said at all.  
  
"This coming from you?" Laguna said, cocking his head slightly and smirking at him. "Mr. Commander Leonheart, also known as "the guy who takes the whole world and routinely plops it up on his shoulders," Laguna teased.  
  
Squall glared at him, but this only made Laguna laugh through his yawning.  
  
With a defeated sigh, Squall said, "you're tired."  
  
"Yeah, a little," Laguna agreed.  
  
"You should go to bed."  
  
Laguna nodded vaguely. "Probably should." But he made no motion to go anywhere. Squall watched the moonlight play off of his profile, head lolling and snapping back up as he tried desperately to stay awake for what was likely some completely ridiculous and illogical reason, hair tumbling all over the place, streaks of wetness down his cheeks, shoulders shuddering only so slightly. If not for the tears, you'd almost think he was laughing instead of crying.  
  
"Let her go, dad. It's what she wants," Squall said softly, testing the impulse, just barely brushing a gloved hand over his father's shoulder.  
  
Laguna put his own hand on top of it and said, "I know Squall, and I'm trying. . .trying so. . .YAWN. . .hard. . .but it's. . .YAWN. . .not. . .easy. . .it's re(YAWN)ally, difficult. . ." Laguna said, unable to stay conscious any longer, head toppling over Squall's shoulder with only the thin white of a t-shirt between them. Squall just let him lay there. He needed sleep after all, and the younger man drifted off thinking, 'how the hell am I going to explain this to Rinoa without her getting all 'that's so cute Squal'l on me? YAWN. Worry about it in the morning,' he tells himself sleepily, and wants to slap whichever dead person has decided that now is the perfect time to applaud the little father/son scene. 'Jace, it's just GOT to be,' his dream mind says.  
  
'What's got to be Jace?' he hears Irvine ask in his mind, which could only mean one thing.  
  
'Alright Elle, just get it over with,' Squall half groans.  
  
And the scene fades in.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
okay, so things got a tad bit weird in there. Squall had some ooc moments in this chapter I think, but it was difficult to write that Squall/Laguna scene while keeping them both completely in character. And once I wrote myself into that corner, I figured it was best to just run with it, rather than trying to write myself out of it. Uh, anyways, lemme know what you think. 


	13. chapter thirteen

No own. No sue.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Thirteen  
  
~~~~~  
  
Sunset. Laguna stood staring up at the angry white building that he hadn't visited since Mr. Donovan's death, and now it held his kid sister in its clutches. He clenched and unclenched his fists angrily as wisps of black hair brushed the shoulders of his blue military uniform. He'd only gotten back to Deling City that morning, and wanted to see Jace, but Mrs. D told him she hadn't seen her in a long time. She lived with her husband these days. One day, she just didn't come home, next thing she knew, people were asking her how married life was treating her daughter. Apparently, the Donovans were no longer a part of her life, but they spoke on the telephone occasionally, a few stolen moments here and there.  
  
What stung more than anything was that she'd married that sadistic bastard to begin with. He'd seen her bruised cheek, the black and blues the shape of slender fingers on her arms, and she wouldn't leave. Because she loved him. As he stared at her still form in the dim hall light he wondered, 'is this what love is? If that's true, then I want no part of it.'  
  
Laguna took a few careful steps toward the sleeping woman. When had she become a woman? Even in this dim light, he could see how badly beaten she'd been. Everybody knew. Didn't she have any pride left? She used to be so proud. Didn't she feel any shame at letting him do these things to her? But she just lie there in uneasy sleep.  
  
He sat carefully on the edge of the bed, taking her hand gently in his own so as not to disturb the iv in her arm or her troubled slumber, reached up with his right hand and brushed some stray locks of hair out of her battered face. Resting his palm gently on her fragile cheek, tears fell from his eyes and he kissed her gently on the forehead, thinking. 'We protect each other? Forever? Yeah right. When did forever become such a short time? I've failed you Jace. . .couldn't save you. But why? Why didn't you want to be saved? Do you still not want it?' His lips lingered on her brow, just barely brushing it as tears fell from his eyes to her skin.  
  
Jace came to slow waking, squeezing gently the hand she found in her own, eyes fluttering open in vague awareness of the wet drops falling on her face, gentle feathers of hair falling over a hand on her cheek, lips that pulled away quickly at the first signs of wakefulness. Sleepy green eyes looked up at him.  
  
"Hey soldier boy," she smiled vaguely. "What'cha cryin' for?" she asked with a soft yawn.  
  
He thought his heart would break in that instant, like he was watching a glass fall in slow motion, waiting for the impending shatter.  
  
"Do you even know where you are?" he asked her, feeling nauseous, her speaking to him in this place like it was the most natural thing in the world.  
  
"My room," she said. "I have my own these days, seems like," she joked. "They keep it empty, just knowing that it won't be long before I come back again. The nurses are really nice like that."  
  
He wasn't sure she was entirely lucid until that last bit about nurses. She knew exactly where she was, and as he sat, dumbstruck with his mind swimming, she just continued talking.  
  
"Max got mad about the letters. He said I was paying more attention to you than him. Sorry I haven't replied in a while, but my mail gets intercepted these days. He reads everything before I even know about it. It's okay though, I don't have any secrets. . .well. . .one. Look at you though, you're hair's getting so long. It really suits you 'guni."  
  
"He did that too, I suppose," Laguna scowled, noting the cast on her left hand.  
  
Jace just shrugged. "He didn't like me writing to you. . .like I said. But I'm getting pretty good with using my right hand for that sort of thing. Right hand. . .that's so silly, as if anything else is the wrong hand. People can be really dumb."  
  
"Just tell me why, Jace. Please. Why do you stay? Why don't you fight back? He hurts you. You think that's love? That's just. . ."  
  
"No. It's not love. It's just possession. He thinks he can own me. . .and he does," she answered frankly, softly, as she turned her head away. "All the same I. . .I love HIM. It's pretty dumb, I know, but it doesn't matter what he does to me. I stay because I love him, for whatever reason. . .who knows? But I do. Heavens help me, I do. And if that means he can own me and do whatever he wants and treat me like a punching bag or something less than human, well. . .that's just fine by me."  
  
'I want to go over there and make him stop, but the second I left, it would only be worse for her,' Laguna thought, bitterly clutching his free hand in a fist at his side that she couldn't see.'  
  
"What's your secret?" he asked.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"You said you had one secret. What is it?"  
  
Jace looked up at him and smiled, answering him with one word. "Life."  
  
And the word echoed through both of the young men's sleeping minds and borrowed memories long into the morning.  
  
Sometime in the mid-morning, Squall and Laguna were awoken by a rather obnoxious pounding on the door behind them. From the way the door shook, Squall presumed, once he had the mental faculties to presume anything, that it just HAD to be Zell.  
  
A voice came from the other side of the door whining, "Come on man! I gotta pee!!" 'Yup,' Squall thought. 'Can I call 'em, or what?'  
  
He realized with a bit of embarrassment that somewhere in the night, they'd shifted positions and his head was cradled into Laguna's shoulder, arms wrapped around his father's waist, and also that Laguna wouldn't be able to move until he did.  
  
He cleared his throat uncomfortably and jumped up stiffly, splashing some water on his face.  
  
"Stop whining!" he barked at the door. Laguna couldn't help but chuckle. Squall was back to his usual self, but there was a fragment of something in his eyes that seemed to tell Laguna that last night wasn't nothing, not just a moment of weakness for the young Commander.  
  
". . .dad," he whispered. "If you say a single word about. . ."  
  
Laguna quickly raised his hands in the air in defense and mock surrender. "I leave the matter entirely in your hands Commander Leonheart," he teased.  
  
Squall growled at him and stalked out of the bathroom, and spinning on his heel, Laguna followed. "All yours Zell," he told the blond, who rushed passed him, missing the bizarreness, or choosing not to mention it until after answering the urgent call of his bladder.  
  
Once everyone was seated at the table, Kennedy came over and handed Laguna a large mug of coffee. "No cream, three sugars," he announced, proud of his unflinching memory. "Scrambled eggs, two, four pieces of toast and strawberry jam, on the way. What'll the rest of you want for breakfast?"  
  
A near unanimous call for coffee went up, except for Irvine, who wanted orange juice. "Can't start the day without it," he chirped in his frivolous way, all the while thinking about his recent journey into the past and that look in Laguna's eyes. 'She must have been in bad shape,' he mused, not really knowing from his perspective if it was true, but it was her words that shook him most. 'One secret. . .life.' Did that mean what he thought it did, or was he just reading too deeply into things? What he thought. . .life-his life. Did she know then that she was going to have a child, and still stayed, still risked it. . .for love? Or did she just mean what she always seemed to mean, that she lived life. . .but was what she was doing at that time. . .could that really be considered living? She was broken, body and soul. . .the fight all but drained out of her entirely. But she was a fighter, he knew. She saved the world. What made her change?  
  
Kennedy smiled. "Jace used to have juice every morning too," he said. "Not orange, necessarily, but always juice. A glass of juice, two pieces of toast with raspberry jam, a banana, or a pear, and a cup of tea, unsweetened, with just a hint of lemon to top it off."  
  
"Sounds good," Irvine said after some careful deliberation. A light breakfast, but perfect for starting off the day, it seemed. "I'll have that," he decided. "Never was one for eatin' heavy first thing."  
  
Orders were tossed around, Zell and Selphie ordering enough for three people each, as usual, Rinoa striking a comfortable middle, a bowl of cereal(with strawberry and banana slices, upon Kennedy's suggestion), coffee heavy on cream and light on sugar, and a piece of toast with butter, not jam, and Squall, well, Squall decided, "I'll have the same as my dad." And on second thought, he added, "one sugar in the coffee," remembering how sweet Esthar's president liked his caffinated beverages, and it was way beyond Squall's tolerance level.  
  
He got more than a few looks from his friends at his choice of phrasing, leaving them wondering why the two men had decided the bathroom floor in the middle of the night was an appropriate place for bonding, but seeing Squall's lips turn down more than usual, Irvine decided to interrupt the teasing session with, "You went to the dream world last night too, right Squall?"  
  
Squall nodded.  
  
"Shorter session than usual, wasn't it? Pick up any trinkets?"  
  
Squall thought about this a moment and then shook his head in a negative fashion. "Not that I know of."  
  
"I did," Irvine commented, and for a moment, Squall worried that the cowboy had gained more of Jace's bruises, but he just held up his right hand, and sure enough there was a Deling City General Hospital band around his wrist, a close fit, but not so tight that it cut off any circulation. He held an arm across the table so that Squall could inspect it, and the steely eyes seemed to cringe a bit as he read the name. *Kinneas, Jace. Blood type: O. Medications: none.* and et cetera.  
  
Laguna unconsciously shivered over his breakfast. Eating had always been quiet time for him. Some people liked to chat while they ate, he supposed, but Laguna, he'd rather just eat and chat afterwards. . .for an extremely long time. But her name on that hospital id bracelet. "Which time was it?" he asked darkly.  
  
'Which time?' Irvine thought with a start. 'How many times were there?'  
  
"How many times did you find her in the hospital?" Squall asked for Irvine, who's throat seemed to have decided to cease function.  
  
Laguna thought a moment and then said, "Twice, I think. But I heard about other times later. Jace didn't keep things from me, and neither did the hospital staff. Everyone knew her situation, but nobody did anything to change it."  
  
"Well, you were in your military uniform, and she had a broken hand. . ." Squall offered, hoping this was enough.  
  
"Ah," Laguna nodded recognition, but went back to his eggs and toast, not seeming to have any need to say anything more.  
  
"You remember. . .?" Irvine prodded.  
  
"It was the first time," he said. "That I found her there, that is. My first leave after I'd joined. . .and the second time in my life that I really wanted to hurt someone. I knew then, if I saw Max Kinneas, he wouldn't survive the encounter, so I went to deliberate ends to avoid him while I was in Deling City. Because hurting him for hurting her. . .it may have made me feel better, but hurting him for hurting her would only make things worse for her in the long run." A sad smile tweaked the corners of his lips as he remembered. "She got so mad at me for trying to convince her to go that whole week, to go anywhere. She knew it wasn't healthy, that one day he might hurt her so bad she would never wake up, but Jace's heart was always fiercely loyal. Once she gave you a piece of herself, it was unconditional, and forever, and she didn't give pieces, she gave chunks. Such a big heart, and so passionate, every moment, every breath was so full of meaning for her. Sometimes, I could look into her eyes and just think that she would explode under the sheer force of her emotions. Just. . .BANG!!! Gone. And in the end, that's really how it was. . .but I'm jumping ahead." Laguna paused. "Liquid Nitrogen. That was Jace-a temperamental, explosive, hot-headed, stubborn foolish force of nature. But she also had a really unique understanding of the world and of people, the darker side of human nature." He paused again, thoughtfully, forcing himself to focus on a single point in time when it was obvious to anyone that a million memories flooded into him. "When I found her in the hospital, she said that she had one secret, and that it was life. I thought she was saying something really deep at the time. . .one of her philosophies about having no regrets, or living every breath of your life. . .but she was really telling me something much more simple. Her secret, life. . .it was you, Irvine. She kept you a secret from him for a long time, as long as she was able to, don't know what she was thinking, or why. I think she was afraid that he would make her abort you if he found out early enough in the pregnancy that it would involve minimum risk and hassle, but that's only speculation on my part. Whatever the case, you really turned things around for her. LIFE. . .it was you. Always. You meant everything to her. That's why she finally left. Telling this story. . .it's been helping me a lot. I'm seeing things much more clearly now. From that moment, when Jace chose your life, it was really out of her control, the choices she made after that. "You want to know what happened, what made Jace leave everything behind and arrive in Bella Maure. Irvine, it was you. Of course it was you."  
  
~~~~~~ . . .blah, formatting. 'tis makin' me groggy. But at least most of the chapters that are already written are up. . .few more to go, then I have to get over my writer's block and start writing new stuff 


	14. chapter fourteen

Here's another baby chapter. And I still don't own ff8.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Fourteen  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
"Once a person chooses their path in life, there's nothing to do but follow that path, to the very end," Jace whispered in her post-labor delirium. It had been a difficult delivery and as much as she insisted she didn't want drugs, that she could handle it, Max insisted.  
  
But Laguna heard her voice from his place outside the door, foot propped up on the wall behind him, arms folded across his chest, and he smiled slightly. "Sounds like she's coming around," he smiled at Kiros and Ward, who had never seen him so serious before now. "Hey, you guys don't hafta stick around if you don't wanna. I'll meet you down at the Galbadia Hotel later on."  
  
"Who is that girl to you, man?" Laguna asked.  
  
"She's my kid sis," Laguna said proudly. "That's my nephew, down the hall there. Irvine. I'll bet she picked that name. It sounds like something she'd come up with."  
  
Irvine grabbed his head, Ellone again, so soon. "Unh," he grumbled and was caught by Zell before his head could collide with the ceramic tea cup. Squall blinked, trying to focus, checking all his internal signs. But Squall wasn't there this time, he was here.  
  
"Off in dream land again," Selphie chirped as she helped Zell adjust him in the chair so that he didn't fall over.  
  
"He's all alone," Squall noted. This was the first time he'd seen this from the outside and it disturbed him that he wasn't there. Why wasn't he there, inside of Laguna's head.  
  
Laguna just nodded. "Yeah. All alone. Just like her," he said with a hard swallow. Whatever Irvine was witnessing now, it was something that he wouldn't be able to tell them about, because he wasn't there. There were so many times that he wasn't there.  
  
"He'll be fine," Squall assured him, but he was half-assuring himself by saying it aloud.  
  
"B-but. . ." Laguna stuttered like a frightened child, green eyes wide and somewhat horrified. "He-he's all alone."  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
okay, that last line is a little. . . odd? Ah well, can't be brilliant all the time I s'pose. R&R you dorks :p 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Disclaimer: I don't own it, so don't sue me.  
  
Couple more chapters of the stuff I already have written. . . might upload it all tonight. Dunno when I'll write another chapter, but I figure seventeen chapters ought to keep people busy for a while.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Fifteen  
  
~~~~~~  
  
Jace holds a tiny pink Irvine in her arms, with Max sitting at the side of the bed, smiling. She smiles back. Max brushes a hand gently over the boy's cheek in a way that is familiar to the woman. She remembers him touching her in a very similar way, in the beginning, and a sudden fear strikes her heart.  
  
"What's his name?" Max asked her.  
  
"I. . .I thought you would want to name him," she asks, genuinely perplexed by Max's honest question.  
  
"Oh, come on, Jace. I know you well enough to know that you must've thought of something that you want to name him, or would like. Just tell me what it is."  
  
"It's. . .Irvine," she whispered.  
  
"Irvine Kinneas, hmm?" he paused for a long moment. "A gentle cowboy then, is it?" he asked.  
  
"That's not. . ."  
  
"That's how it sounds. You were a gentle cowboy once too, remember? But you changed," he frowned. "Maybe Irvine won't become weak like you did."  
  
Jace just stared at Max, dumbfounded, as he stood up. "I really did love you, once, you know," he said to the wall. "I called you my sapphire dream. You haven't forgotten, have you?"  
  
"No. . .I haven't. When did you stop, Max? Loving me, that is?" she asked, feeling suddenly broken and angry at him, her heart so full of the baby in her arms and a fear that he might hurt her son that something fell away, some defensive gentleness was shattered.  
  
"When I realized that you only loved me with part of your heart.not like me at all. I didn't love anything but you, but you still shared your heart with someone else."  
  
"What?" she asked, trying to follow what he was saying.  
  
"That day. . .that day I met Laguna Loire for the first time. My only condolence was that he didn't have all of your heart either. So I took you away from him to make sure he never would." He turned as if to leave the room. "He's out in the hallway right now, you know. Stubborn bastard. Wants to meet his nephew. But I won't let him. Irvine will love only me, my gentle cowboy, MINE. The way that you never did. I think I'll go show big brother that he doesn't belong here."  
  
Jace's heart caught, and before she knew it, a fierce anger in her quivering voice snapped, "Don't you touch him. Don't you dare! You're not half the man that he. . ." she caught herself with a gasp. "I-Max-sorry."  
  
But Max was uncharacteristically calm, almost distant. "Jace," he said. "Never again. You won't trick me again. You're just a phantom who haunts my dreams. You don't mean anything, nothing at all. You aren't even real. A woman incapable of love. So sad. So pathetic."  
  
In her arms, an infant Irvine cried at the tension in the room as his father departed.  
  
"Shh. It's alright Irvine. My tiny shooting star. Shh. My little love. You boys just taught me something very important," Jace whispered, pulling the baby tighter to her chest and snuggling him slightly as she slowly pushed her legs over the side of the bed. "Let's get outta here, huh sweetie? That man, he'll never hurt you, I promise. I won't let anybody hurt you, not ever. My precious little boy."  
  
Jace thought a moment, maneuvering Irvine as she tried to find her things. 'I'll go back to mum's house and pick up the stuff I left there, just a few things. I'm sure she'll let me take a bit of food too, if I explain that it's for a good cause. Mum. I really miss her, but if I leave, I have to go far away. I can't stay in Deling, even if it.even if it means I won't get to see 'guni anymore. He'll understand. I have to protect Irvine now. Laguna. . .you've become really strong, please take care of yourself from now on.' As she thought this, she looked down at the baby in her arms and a few silent tears fell from her eyes. "I'm going to be giving up a lot, huh? We'll be so far away from everyone. I want to introduce you to your grandma and your Uncle though, if they're there when I go to get things for us. We'll be okay, Irvine, just you watch, we're going to be just fine. But where are we gonna go?" She thought for a long moment.  
  
'Mom. Momma. You're the best. I love you so much.' Irvine thought as he awkwardly looked down at himself through her eyes, and could see how beautiful he looked through the eyes of someone who loved him that much.  
  
'He said he'd get to see the world. . .' Jace thought, almost jumping up in her good spirits as she realized aloud, " 'guni will know what to do! He can tell me places I can go. He's been lots of places, right? It'll be great, and then he'll know where we are and can maybe visit us once in a while, and he can tell mum and she can see us too.if she wants. Ooo. Let's see. . .how to contact him though. A letter. I can dictate a letter to Nurse Horley and she can have it delivered to him, to meet me somewhere.where will we meet him? Duh! Mum's house, of course!" she cheered, happily doing a small spin with the baby cradled tightly in her arms, no chance of letting go. She pressed the tiny button to call the nurse and the pudgy woman with her disheveled blond bun popped her head inside.  
  
"Something you need, Miss Jace?"  
  
Nurse Horley always called her Miss Jace, even though her name was technically Mrs. Kinneas, and most of the other nurses had picked up on the habit and did the same.  
  
"I would like to dictate a letter to you," Jace said, absently rocking the infant in her arms. "Secretly. It would need to be delivered immediately. Do you think you can manage that?"  
  
"I can send one of the orderlies. Who is this letter for?"  
  
"My brother Laguna. I need his help. Ms. Horley, Irvine and I are going to be leaving Deling City. Immediately. Tonight. I won't let that man lay a finger on my little boy. I'm really. . .I'm very afraid for his safety. I know it's against hospital protocol, but. . .do you think, maybe you could turn your back, just this once?"  
  
"Miss Jace, please stay put while I go get some paper."  
  
Squall has been carefully watching Irvine, and sees no new wounds surfacing, no random objects miraculously appearing, but as he watches, he feels the familiar tug of dream.  
  
'Ellone.why didn't you send me and Irvine at the same time.?' he starts to ask in the blackness before the dream begins.  
  
'Because, Squall, I didn't send Irvine into the past this time. I don't know who did, but I'm sending you to where I think he is now.'  
  
Squall didn't have time to register this before he blinked painfully awake to find himself feeling as if he'd just been slugged and looking down at blood in his palm. Vision blurry but clearing, Laguna brings his hand to his nose to wipe some more blood away before glaring at Max Kinneas and lunging at him, tackling him to the ground.  
  
"He's my nephew you asshole. You don't own them. They're people. Human beings, you know what a human being is, don't you!" he snaps angrily between connecting his fist repeatedly with Max's ribcage and taking multiple hits to the face and head. Laguna can't see straight pretty much at all. He knows he's brawling with Max, that his fist is connecting with something somewhere on the other man's body, someone's grunting in pain to a rhythm as blow connects after blow after blow, and he's not entirely sure that it isn't him. He's dizzy, he can taste blood on his lips, and all he can think is, 'this little shit deserves whatever he gets, and I'm not about to quit giving.'  
  
He isn't really sure when he passed out, but he assumes that means he lost the fight. He sees Kiros and Ward hovering over him. "You really did it this time," Kiros commented. "When're you gonna learn that violence doesn't solve everything, Laguna?"  
  
"I know it doesn't," Laguna said defensively, his voice sounding a bit groggy to his ears. "But it sure makes me feel better," he grins briefly as his comrades help him up, one on each arm.  
  
"Getting the crap beat out of yourself makes you feel better. Laguna Loire, you are one really weird guy," Ward commented playfully.  
  
"I got in a few good hits," Laguna said defensively, shoving the hair out of his mouth. ". . .I think." His head bobs as he tries to shake off the dizziness.  
  
Kiros holds up a few fingers and says, "Alright, Laguna," with a sigh. "How many fingers am I holding up?"  
  
"Probably not near as many as I'm seeing," Laguna answers languidly. "Is it possible to see in triplicate. . .or quadruples even?"  
  
Ward laughs and gets up. "What're you doin' man?" Laguna asks as he sees a large blur and assumes it to be his friend Ward.  
  
"I'm getting you a drink. I think you could use one," Ward laughs and walks over to the bar. Laguna squints, his vision slowly coming back into focus. He doesn't have to see Kiros to know that the other man is rolling his eyes at Ward's ever-present opinion that alcohol is capable of solving just about any problem you can think of. Not that he was a lush, or anything, but the man DID like to drink.  
  
"I wanna see Jace," Laguna frowned as he tried to get hold of his faculties long enough to stand, and failed tragically.  
  
"You want her to see you like this? You must really love that girl."  
  
"She's my sis. 'course I love her. I gotta know that she's okay."  
  
"You're staying put until I'm sure you haven't gone and gotten yourself a concussion. . .again," Kiros half-ordered. "Your vision still fuzzy?"  
  
"A little?"  
  
"How many fingers do you see?" Kiros tried again holding up his hand and spreading all five digits wide.  
  
After a considerable silence and a few long moments of blinking, Laguna finally can see something that resembles a hand, it's a little blurry, but at least Kiros no longer has twelve fingers on each hand and three heads.  
  
"Three," Laguna answers flatly with a slight yawn. "Thumbs and pinkies don't count."  
  
"How come?" Ward asks, just knowing that Laguna will have one of his 'perfectly logical' explanations for why pinkies and thumbs don't count as fingers as the large man puts drinks down on the table.  
  
"Middle finger, Pointer finger, Ring finger," Laguna elucidates. "Pinky and Thumb don't have that qualifier. Well okay, you technically CAN say 'pinky finger'. . .but who'd ever want to? And you never ever say 'thumb finger', because it sounds stupid. Hence, three fingers per hand, plus a thumb and a pinky each. Where's my drink?"  
  
Squall groans as he blinks awake to find Laguna holding a towel against what feels like a very sore nose.  
  
"Wha. . .?"  
  
"You're nose is bleeding, just sit still until it stops," Laguna told him. He only manages to stay awake for a few raw moments before the dream world swallows him again.  
  
'Elle.what the hell?'  
  
'Um. . .heh. Moving right along,' Ellone comments by way of an apology that doesn't sound all too apologetic to the frazzled young man as he finds himself staring at wide green eyes rimmed with red in the mirror as Laguna puts ice to his swollen nose, pulls it away and winces, then puts it back on, pulls it away and winces again. Finally, with a disgruntled, but determined, sigh, Laguna puts the ice on his nose and holds it there, leaning his head back on the couch.  
  
"This sucks," he grumbled under his breath. He's exhausted, but has been told with all due certainty that he isn't allowed to sleep. . .so why the hell had Mrs. Donovan thought it was a good idea to put him onto this soft plushy couch they had in the living room? The very same couch that had always made him want to take a nap every time he sat on it. . .even when he didn't have a concussion, as he did now.  
  
"I feel kinda woozy," Zell commented, blinking.  
  
"M-me too. . ." Selphie replied as both of them fell into the dream world. Kiros and Ward again, from the looks of things, in the Galbadia Hotel, drinking together, but with none of their usual cheer.  
  
The orderly ran into the Galbadia Hotel and downstairs into the lounge. Seeing two men who were at the hospital earlier, he runs over. "E- excuse me. Are either of you Mr. Laguna Loire?" he asks breathlessly. He's been trying to track down Laguna to give him this letter for hours.  
  
"No, but we know him. Do you need something," Kiros asked.  
  
"I have a letter that needs to be delivered to him post haste," he replied.  
  
"Hey, relax man. I'll give him a call, we can head over to wherever he is as soon as he gives us directions," Kiros said, pulling a small phone out of his uniform.  
  
"H'lo?" Laguna asked, glad that the ringing had managed to keep him from nearly dozing off.  
  
"Laguna? You still at your old house? We got a guy here who needs to get a letter to you."  
  
"Where are you?" Laguna asked.  
  
"Same place you left us man, the hotel. Give us some directions, we'll. . ."  
  
"Nah. I'll come there. I know my way around better, so just stay put, I'll be there soon," Laguna told them.  
  
"What about your head?"  
  
"Moving will keep me from falling asleep. Don't worry. I've got a killer headache, but other than that, no big thing. I'm on my way." -Click.-  
  
Kiros frowned at the phone.  
  
"What's up?" Ward asked.  
  
"He hung up on me. He could've at least said goodbye first."  
  
"Polite as ever. You get the directions to that house?"  
  
"He's coming here," Kiros said before turning to the orderly. "You can leave the letter with us man, we'll see he gets it soon as he walks in."  
  
"Great! Thanks. You really saved my ass right now. I owe ya one!" the orderly grinned, handing the letter over to Ward, and ran out of the hotel to get back to the hospital.  
  
Laguna couldn't seem to run more than a few feet without toppling over, so he settled for walking as quickly as he could manage. He felt a lot less dizzy when he was sitting down. His equilibrium was completely off kilter. As a result, it took him almost forty minutes to get to the hotel, where Kiros and Ward waited impatiently by the door, rather stressed with worry.  
  
"Hey, sorry I'm late," Laguna said, his words slurring at the end as he passed out.  
  
"Laguna!" Kiros shouted with a start as Ward caught their falling comrade. "You idiot," he sighed as he followed Ward back into the hotel with an unconscious Laguna slung over his shoulder.  
  
Jace walked in the front door, using the key that was hidden under the mat. "Mum? Laguna?" she asked.  
  
"Who's there?" Mrs. Donovan asked cautiously as she made her way around the corner. "Laguna? Is that you? You shouldn't be up and around right now. . ." she said, obvious tension in her voice, but it was still her, still. . .  
  
"Mum," Jace whispered as the woman came around the corner. She hadn't seen her mother in far too long, and it was almost too much to see how old she'd gotten. Her hair had begun to gray around the temples and there were tiny worry wrinkles around her once bright eyes. "Mum. It's me, Jace. I. . .just thought I'd. . .um. . .stop by," she said nervously.  
  
"Jace! Oh my poor poor baby girl!" Mrs. Donovan said, moving quickly to her daughter, about to embrace her when she saw the tiny white bundle in her arms.  
  
"Is this. . .?"  
  
"Mum. I want you to meet your grandson, Irvine," Jace said, all pride at the little sleeping face wrapped up contentedly in the hospital blanket and her arms.  
  
"You named him after your father," Mrs. Donovan said, smiling.  
  
"I've decided that it's okay to remember the past, as long as we don't let it rule our lives," Jace answered. "I don't want to forget dad, just because he isn't around anymore. He taught me lots of important things."  
  
"Like shooting, eh?" Mrs. Donovan asked, pointing at the pistols on her daughter's hips.  
  
"Like living," Jace corrected. "But, yeah, shooting too. It might come in handy one day; that's what he said. I think he may be right."  
  
Mrs. Donovan nodded, bending over the baby and pulling the blankie closer around his chin while saying, "well, hello little Irvine, my precious little grandson. I'm sure you'll make us all very proud one day, just like your gran-dad did. And I'll bet your mom will too, when she's ready."  
  
"Hey, Mum, is 'guni here?"  
  
Mrs. Donovan looked at the empty couch with obvious worry on her expression. "He isn't in, just now. Perhaps he went out with those friends of his."  
  
Jace sighed. She knew that expression. How could she forget it. Concern had etched her mother's features too many times to not leave it's mark on her.  
  
"What do you really think?" she asked, more of a statement than a question.  
  
"That husband of yours did a bad job on your big brother tonight. But you know Laguna, he's stubborn as a mule. I'm sure he'll be okay, and he won't be out long, likely. He knows how I worry. But, Jace, what brings you here?"  
  
"Irvine and I are leaving Deling City, Mum. I just came for some things. . .and some advice. I think I'll probably always love Max a little, in spite of myself, and everything he's done, but I won't risk my little boy for something so trivial as all of that. I've decided that some things are more important, you know. . .than that sort of love. Irvine is much more important to me than all that."  
  
"Jace, my little girl. It looks like you've finally decided to grow up and become the woman we always knew you'd be. Where will you go?"  
  
"I'm not sure. That's sort of why I wanted to talk to Laguna. Someplace. . .someplace far away from everything, where we can live and die quietly. Someplace that it doesn't matter who I was, or what sort of life I lived before. Because I. . .I've made too many mistakes to relive them all. From now on, I'm just going to do whatever is the best thing for my little boy. So I have to leave everything behind now, even you, mum. All the same I. . .I'm gonna miss you a lot."  
  
"Shh. None of that now. Your old mum'll always be with you, and don't you forget it. Let's get you some things packed up then. I'm sure your big brother will be back by the time we're finished. Here, let an old woman hold her grandson, hm? Just this once."  
  
Jace handed over the sleeping baby to her mother and said, "why don't you relax. I just need to go upstairs and get some things I left behind, I'll be back down soon. You just, relax huh? You look tired, bond with your grandson or something. I won't be long."  
  
"Alright baby. You're room's just as you left it, except maybe a little cleaner. If you can't find anything you just come on down and ask."  
  
In her room, Jace pulled out the red knapsack she'd used when she was in school, before Max forced her to drop out, that is. It was almost a shame, because for all her bad behavior, all her determination to live life according to her own rules in those days, she was actually pretty good at all that intellectual shit. She frowned. 'I could've been really smart, I'll bet, in a different world.' She shook her head. That was all in the past anyway, and as it was, the school she had been going to had been shut down over two years ago now. But it had a little more honor to say you didn't graduate because you're school closed down than it was to say you didn't graduate because you just stopped going. Jace was on record as a drop-out too, one more article of shame to hit herself with. All for what? All for Max? Ptah! All for nothing. She sighed. 'All for nothing.'  
  
She dropped the backpack on the bed and sifted through her drawers. A change of clothing. Something comfortable. She was a little fat now, heck, she just had a baby a few hours ago, but aside from that, she hadn't changed much since she'd lived at home. She threw a pair of blue jeans and two white tees in the bag. She abandoned the worn sneakers she was wearing for a pair of comfortable work boots that she never wore in high school because they didn't suit the image she was sporting in those days and dropped the sneakers in the wastebasket, reminding herself, 'never again.' After all, Max had bought her those sneakers. They were ugly, she thought, not made for running, or walking, or anything active at all, and they reminded her that, for a while, she had been a dominated woman. The rest of the room in the pack would be for Irvine's things. She couldn't afford to bring too much. A toothbrush and some soap, then diapers, bottles. There was a lot that she could get when she arrived, or on the way there. For now, the bare necessities would have to do.  
  
She stopped at the door beside hers, five and a half steps closer to the stairs than her own. This was Laguna's room, when he'd lived here, and it was probably just the same too. She decided to go inside. Opening the door whilst faking her usual wild grin she whispered, "hiya 'guni! You busy? No? Good!" like she always used to say whether he was busy or not. And he would answer, "Never too busy for you, sis. What's up?" usually while looking putting down his pencil or closing a book. He did his homework way too often for her liking. She used to call him 'my nerdy, do- gooder big brother.'  
  
Her expression dropped. It still smelled like him. After all this time, she still remembered what he smelled like. It was some mixture between boy smell and wildflowers. Nothing perfumey, just sort of gentle and fragrant.  
  
"I just need to borrow some things," she whispered as a tear rolled down her cheek. "It's okay, right?"  
  
This was harder than she thought it would be. She moved to the dresser and pulled out one of his white undershirts from when he was younger and smaller and exchanged her dirty t-shirt for it. Only one last thing that she needed now, a jacket, and she knew which one she wanted. She opened the closet door and reached in the back, on the left side where things were allowed to get a little musty. Her fingers ran over denim softened from years of wear and she yanked it out. Faded at the elbows and shoulders, just barely frayed at the left wrist. He'd worn this jacket every day for years until he finally grew out of it and had to buy another. It was just her size now. Most people would cringe at hand-me-downs, but Jace hugged the denim to her chest for a long moment before slipping into it like a warm blanket on a cold night. "You don't mind, do ya 'guni? It's not like it fits you anymore anyway. And I. . .I want to remember. This will help me remember all the happy times we had as kids, before I. . .before I fell in love, when things were good and life was easy. When we were happy and didn't know how to be sad. That's the legacy I want to pass on to my son. A smiling face full of love, just like things were then."  
  
Jace picked up her bag and began her way down the stairs. The sound of her mother's voice cracking in a harsh whisper with words she couldn't make out made her pause halfway down. Then, slight sobbing. Jace ran.  
  
"Mum? Mum! What's wrong?" she pleaded, watching as her mother hung the phone back on the receiver. The woman turned to her daughter, gesturing to some things on the table, old baby blankets, cloth diapers, a pacifier still wrapped up in plastic that was yellowed from age, a baby bag with two teddy-bears and daisies decorating it. The woman had been packing it all up for her daughter on the kitchen table, a baby bottle half hung out of the side pocket.  
  
"That was Max," Mrs. Donovan whispered. "I told him I had no idea where you were, but Irvine woke up and started crying for his mamma. Baby, he's coming here right now. He'll be here any minute."  
  
"Shit! I can't wait for 'guni then. Mum, I gotta go, now! He's not gonna take Irvine away from me, not ever!" Jace said as she shoved the items on the table haphazardly into the bag and zipped it up, shoving anything that didn't fit when jammed in so absently into her red knapsack along with the water and food her mother had already stuck in the bag. Things for Jace, things for Irvine, things for both of them.  
  
Jace slung the bags over her back and shoulders, took Irvine from her mother quickly, tightly into her arms as the nervous infant smiled up at her and fell asleep again. She gave her mother a quick peck on the cheek and started to run for the back door.  
  
"Jace! Where will you go?!" her mother called, frantic with worry.  
  
"I'll let you know when I get there!" Jace called back. "I'll write, or call, I'll think of something mum, I promise. We're gonna be okay from now on. Just the two of us."  
  
"Be careful babies," Mrs. Donovan whispered as her daughter ran out of her life for the second time. She grabbed her chest, the one secret she'd kept so well, and moved to the cupboard for her heart medication, but she would never make it that far.  
  
Laguna blinked awake, feeling nautious, and with the worst headache. He had no idea where he was, but Kiros was there, and Ward. Suddenly, he remembered what he'd left the house for in the first place.  
  
"Kiros, the letter!" he gulped, his voice sounding far too loud to him.  
  
"Here," Kiros said, passing it to Laguna whilst looking at him with concerned eyes.  
  
Laguna took the paper and squinted at it, lines and letters dancing over the page as he was hit with another spell of dizziness. He handed it back to Kiros.  
  
"Read it to me," he said.  
  
So Kiros read:  
  
*Laguna,  
  
I have decided to leave Deling City, for Irivne's sake. Tonight.  
Please meet me at Mom's house as soon as you get this letter. It's very  
important. I need your help.  
  
See you soon,  
  
Your favorite little sis,  
  
Jace Kinneas  
  
The name on the letter was barely legible, obviously, the girl had attempted to sign with her one good hand, but it was at least obvious that she had chosen to sign with her married name. And from what Kiros had heard from Laguna, which was, thanks to Laguna's penchant for storytelling, quite a bit, Jace was a very peculiar girl. "To live every day of my life, without regrets, and without reservations, that is what I desire." Kiros remembered how proud Laguna had sounded when he told them of the day Jace told him that. A woman who lives completely in the present, with no care for the past and no hopes for the future-that is what Kiros thought of her, but now, he wondered if he hadn't been at least partially wrong, or if the girl had changed in some mysterious and unknown way, right under all of their noses. Jace Kinneas, he decided, whoever she was, whatever personality flaws she might have, was a strong woman with an equally strong will to fight. And for her sake, as well as for Laguna's sake, and his own sense of honor, he HAD to help them. Besides, he wanted to meet her and find out if she was all that Laguna made her out to be.  
  
But even with Laguna's newfound strength and determination as the young man thought, 'Shit! I was just there!', it was already too late. 


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Disclaimer, and etc. . .  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Sixteen  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
Squall and Irvine blinked awake almost simultaneously. Irvine looked at Squall with a nautious expression and opened his mouth to speak.  
  
"Where was he?" he asked emotionally.  
  
"Unconscious," Squall answered sourly before looking at his father. "You were too late, weren't you?"  
  
Laguna, from the brief conversation, guessed at where they'd just come from, and nodded, "I was too late to save either of them," he whispered. "Five minutes sooner. . ." Laguna shook his head sadly. "When I got back to the house, Jace was already gone and Mrs. Donovan was dead on the kitchen floor. Max was kneeling over her sobbing, begging her to wake up. I still remember. "This isn't fucking funny. Come on, wake up! Be okay!" he was saying, and his whole body was shivering. "Don't die," he was saying, but it was already too late, and, even though he didn't mean to, he was the one who killed her."  
  
Laguna remembered it too well. For the first time since he'd met Max Kinneas, he thought, 'this guy might just be human after all. Not that that excuses anything, but. . .still. . .' He couldn't help but feel a little pity as Max sat there, hugging himself, rocking back and forth like some neglected child, begging his wife's mother not to die, but knowing it was already too late for that. Others, probably, would have said, fuck him, he deserves this, but Laguna was always a hopeless puppy-dog when it came to emotions, and Max was so wrapped up in himself that he didn't even hear Laguna come in, or Kiros and Ward trading ideas about what was wrong with the guy.  
  
"Max, where's Jace?" Laguna asked after a long moment. That was just the most important thing to him right now.  
  
Max's wide blue eyes snapped up at Laguna, who was leaning on the door frame for support. "I. . .I dunno. She WAS here, but, she left before I arrived."  
  
"Gee, wonder why," Laguna snapped.  
  
"I. . .I was wrong. I know you hate me. I guess I deserve to be hated. All the same, I just. . .I didn't want to share Jace with anybody."  
  
"Not even her own mother?!? Not even me?"  
  
"ESPECIALLY NOT YOU!" Max hollered, suddenly fierce, his voice escaping as almost a growl, then he broke down and sobbed. "Jace loved me in a certain way, and you in a certain other way. . .and I loved Jace in both of those ways, but she always loved you better. The way she loved you went all the way down to the bones of the earth with all the other things that can't be broken. I thought that if I took her away from you. . .if she only had me. . .then. . .so I decided not to share. . .but it didn't work out the way I intended. The love she has for you is fierce and flawless. I wanted that sort of strong emotion, but her feelings for me were so soft, like water coming and going and yielding to everything. She loved me with the piece of her that I hated, and only that tiny piece. I hate you Laguna Loire! I hate you so much because you never go away, you're her virus, you bastard! Why won't you let her go!?! Just tell me why you won't let her go?!" Max demanded, shoving himself to his feet to face off with the woozy green eyes that stared sadly at him.  
  
"Because Jace and I. . .we promised to protect one another long before either of us really knew what that meant. Still, it was a promise. Didn't you and Jace have any promises?"  
  
". . .she promised she wouldn't leave, as long as I was the strongest."  
  
Laguna thought a moment. Jace had always been drawn to strength, and there was a time, yes, that Max had had just that.  
  
"Then you can't blame her for leaving, now that she's found her own strength," Laguna said. "That's just the way Jace is. If strength was the only thing you had over her, then no wonder. . .no wonder. Strength, Max, it isn't a physical thing, not really-it never has been, not for her."  
  
"Then what is it? If you understand her so well, then tell me!" he h  
  
"It's. . .a way of living, every day, for the rest of your life, and knowing in your heart that you always did the right thing. Strength is water. . .giving in. . . It's. . .a willingness to sacrifice everything for love." Laguna looked at Max's attentive features, this last sentence seeming a physical blow on the man, so something bitter in Laguna couldn't help but add, "and you never had that. It was only a matter of time before she figured it out."  
  
"That I'm weak," Max whispered.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"But. . .I don't want to be strong, if that's what strength is."  
  
"Then you'll always be alone. And now, you're going to tell me what happened to Mrs. D."  
  
"It turns out he was enraged and hollered at her some until she just collapsed under the stress," Laguna explained. "Mrs. D had a weak heart in her old age. With Jace leaving again and worrying about that, and me nowhere to be found in the midst of a concussion, and then Max coming in and raising up a storm full of hellfire, it just gave up on her. In the long run though, I suppose it was the best thing, some people just aren't meant to live their lives alone."  
  
Laguna frowned thoughtfully.  
  
"What happened to Max after that?" Selphie asked, not really sure if anyone else was wondering.  
  
"Well, I had to leave not long afterwards, but I heard that there was a trial against him, but without Jace there to testify to anything it was pretty pointless. Anyway, as best I know, he was declared emotionally unstable and put in some asylum. Still there for all I know, and fact of the matter is, I never cared enough to check up. I'd rather go on pitying the guy then remembering why I hated him in the first place. I think that's best."  
  
"But you've been to Bella Maure, so how did you ever find mom?" Irvine asked.  
  
"Well, it could have been luck, or fate. At the time, we chocked it all up to the fairies, or some random whim of the desert gods."  
  
"The desert gods?" Zell asked.  
  
"That's what Kiros called them. Apparently, in ancient times, there were a lot of different beliefs about things. I guess the desert gods came a long time before Hyne did, I don't know. They're probably no more real than the fairies are, but I still like to believe in fairies." 


	17. Chapter Seventeen

Disclaimer and et cetera.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Seventeen  
  
~~~~~  
  
'Deling City. . .again. It hasn't felt like home since Jace left and Mrs. D passed away, but I still like it here,' Laguna thought as he looked back at the city as he and his comrades climbed into their van to head to the nearest base. From the sounds of things, they'd have a new mission lined up for them when they got there, and they'd only just got off the last one.  
  
"Now I'm as much for monster-bashing as the next guy, but this is getting ridiculous," Ward complained through half-lidded eyes.  
  
"Right? Almost makes you wish for a war, doesn't it?" Kiros half-joked through a yawn.  
  
"Never say that!" Laguna nearly jumped out of his skin. "It's asking for trouble. Let's just hope it's an easy mission. We're pretty low-ranking, so they wouldn't put us on anything too dangerous, right?" he said hopefully.  
  
"If you think of it in terms of rank, you might say we're pretty low- ranking so we're also highly expendable," Kiros commented bitterly.  
  
Laguna cringed. He hated to think about that aspect of the military and Kiros knew it. He only threw it in Laguna's face when he was exhausted, as he was now. Rolling his eyes at the apparent belief in his friend's eyes as the man frowned slightly, Kiros said, "but you're probably right, anyway."  
  
"Ah. Mr. Loire, I presume? I've heard some interesting things about you," General McDavin said as the trio stood before him at tired attention. "At ease," he said, as if he'd forgotten to say it earlier and waved his hand absently in a casual gesture.  
  
"Y-you have, sir?" Laguna asked, not sure if he was supposed to or not.  
  
"Oh yes, any number of things. Actually though, I've had something meant for you in my possession since last spring," the General said as he pulled an envelope out of his desk drawer. "This letter came to me by the most peculiar means. For Laguna Loire, as per Galbadian Military Forces, western branch. Someone with little information as to your whereabouts must have seen this as something rather important. I must say, I've been quite curious, though I didn't suppose we'd ever actually meet, Lieutenant Loire."  
  
Laguna held out his hand and accepted the letter with quivering fingers. He didn't dare hope, but also, he knew there was only one person who would send him a letter, or have reason to. 'Jace.'  
  
He peeled back the seal, which barely held, (old glue in desert heat this long, it was bound to happen that way) and pulled out the single sheet of paper, which was beginning to yellow where it had been creased for almost a year, or longer. It must have been an old letter when the General first received it, but why? The location of the western base of the Galbadian Military was common knowledge, it should not have had any difficulty arriving here. In the top corner, the date informed him that the letter had been written only three months after she had left Deling City, and her signature at the bottom showed that her hand had not completely healed yet. Still, the handwriting was hers, strained and careful, but definitely Jace's handwriting with the overly tall capital letters and sweeping strokes of the pen, the would-be-dots that were really more like dashes over the i's and the crooked crosses that made her t's look almost like x's. You almost had to be specifically trained to read this handwriting, but at the same time, it was dramatic and elegant even in it's haste.  
  
He read the first lines:  
  
*Dear Laguna,  
  
I hope this letter finds you well. Heck, I hope this letter finds you. Irvine and I are in a small village somewhere in eastern Centra, I think. It's a bit behind the times and doesn't even have it's own mailing address, if you can believe that, but I like it here, it suits me. Tell mom that Irvine loves that stupid duck blankie, and I can't seem to get him to go anywhere without it! I'm not sure whether to thank her or give her a good slap!. . .*  
  
He couldn't finish the letter there. It was too emotional for him, and he'd be damned if he was going to start sobbing in front of a General. He told himself this even as a few tears fell from his eyes and he folded the letter up, collecting himself as best he could before putting the paper into his pocket.  
  
"Are you alright, Lieutenant Loire?" the General asked.  
  
"Y-yes sir," Laguna gulped. "It's just. . .a letter from my kid sister."  
  
"I take it you're very close then."  
  
"Y-yes sir," Laguna said. "May I be excused, for a bit?" he asked, trying to fight back tears at knowing that Jace was okay, and his desire to go hide somewhere and read the letter to his heart's content where he could cry as freely as he wanted.  
  
The General nodded, giving him a peculiar look. "That's fine. Why don't the three of you return after dinner tonight. I'll have your next mission ready for you then."  
  
The three men saluted and began their way out, Kiros stopping at the doorway and saying respectfully. "Please excuse the Lieutenant sir. His sister and nephew have been missing for the past two years. It takes it's toll on a guy."  
  
The General nodded. "I would presume so," he said before Kiros saluted again and disappeared through the doorway.  
  
"What kind-hearted young men," General McDavin whispered. "I only hope they're also very strong young men, because they have a trying mission ahead of them."  
  
General McDavin sighed slightly. He knew better than anyone that the deserts east of Deling City would be hard on anyone but those few tough settlers who'd been out there, somewhere in between the sandstorms, since- probably, the beginning of time immemorial. He hated to send young boys out into that, but there just wasn't anyone else to send. Everyone was pretty concerned with Esthar and Adel these days, so promising low-ranking officers would simply have to do for pretty much everything else.  
  
"Out cold again, huh?" Laguna frowned slightly, but it was more amusing now than sad as he slung Squall into a better position in his chair so that he didn't fall over.  
  
Rinoa sighed, brushing some of his long bangs from an uneasily sleeping face. "Ellone must be sending them back as soon as she has the energy for the return trip," she frowned. "You must have scared her pretty badly, Laguna."  
  
"Maybe, but this is a little overboard."  
  
Irvine had toppled over onto Selphie's shoulder, his hat tumbling into her lap. She squeezed his hand gently. "My poor cowboy is getting one hell of a history lesson," she said. "But I think it's good that Irvy gets to know where he comes from now. Most of us don't know, so it seems more important."  
  
"Family is a funny thing," Zell commented. "I always had Ma n' Pa, and we've got each other n'stuff, but it's not the same thing as knowing where your blood comes from."  
  
'Zell, once in a while, just occasionally, you say something really smart,' Rinoa thought, but she didn't voice this. Instead, she smiled slightly and said, "I wonder where they are now."  
  
'Where is this?' Squall wondered as he saw Laguna looking around what appeared to be some sort of metal compartment full of crates, a cargo area of sorts it seemed.  
  
Laguna flung himself up onto a large wooden crate and fished the letter out of his pocket again. The shipping area was pretty abandoned when there wasn't anything coming or going, and there wasn't anything due to move until tomorrow, so he figured this would be a good place to hide himself while he found out what had been going on with Jace and Irvine.  
  
*Dear Laguna,  
  
I hope this letter finds you well. Heck, I hope this letter finds you. Irvine and I are in a small village somewhere in eastern Centra, I think. It's a bit behind the times and doesn't even have it's own mailing address, if you can believe that, but I like it here, it suits me. Tell mom that Irvine loves that stupid duck blankie, and I can't seem to get him to go anywhere without it! I'm not sure whether to thank her or give her a good slap! Well, I guess I'll thank her. As long as my little Irvy is happy it doesn't matter if he's got a duck fetish or not.  
  
Laguna paused, imagining Jace chuckling as she wrote that line.  
  
*I'm sorry I missed you the day I left, but, well I guess mom told you what happened with Max calling and all, and I know you probably want to hear what happened after I left Deling City. Well, Irvine and I headed North or, intended to head North, actually. It started out as North, whatever the case. I figured I could travel along the beach and find one of those little shore towns, take a boat out to Trabia or somewhere like that, but.well, you know.I got a little lost. I never did have the best sense of direction, after all. Anyway, by the time I realized we were in a bit of trouble, stuck out in the middle of nowhere in the Centra Desert, it was really pretty pointless to turn back and go another way. We were too far in and turning back would only be traveling further into the desert, especially since I didn't know which way was up, or which way I should even go to get out of the desert if I knew which way was up anyway. So we just kept walking. I really hate blood soul's by the way! Pesky little things don't know how to die proper! It's a damn good thing my aim is perfect, you know, or we'd have been in some trouble. Anyway, I'm not sure how long we went on like that. A few days I guess, maybe a week. A sandstorm picked up pretty much out of nowhere and I thought we were totally done for when I saw this place, just barely, all these tiny steepled roofs and such, like a village. I was sure it was a mirage, desperation playing tricks on me, or the sun, or the desert heat, or any of a number of things. But we made it through the storm and found the tiniest little village built on a pretty little oasis with a big lake full of fish. And it's the desert, so it's warm all year round. The summer's are pretty hot it seems, but I can get to liking it.  
  
Anyway, the place is called Bella Maure and we're staying in this little loft room above the local tavern. The landlord, Kennedy, is a real peach of a guy, and as long as I help with the cleaning and such, we get to stay pretty much for free. The sandstorms keep the monsters away too, which is nice, because I swear, I've been hit with enough thundagas to last me a lifetime and then some. It's a miracle I don't glow!  
  
I miss you and mom a lot though, and my guitar! I left it at Max's and hell if I was going back there to get it! Well, poop on that! I guess I'll just have to deal with it. With a little wood I can probably figure out how to build myself a little acoustic number, but I'll miss that soul whine that only an electric guitar can really achieve. In the past, ya know, like I always say. No point in dwelling on it. I'd give you some coordinates to visit me, if I had them, but it seems Bella Maure is the type of place you can't find unless you're chasing down a storm, or one's chasing you. The people in this village-they spend their whole lives here, never expecting to go anywhere else, to see anything but the sunset over a horizon of endless sand, the same sunset they see every day. It sounds like such a boring, solitary life, doesn't it? A year ago, that's what I would have believed, but now, I watch that sunset every night, a sunset that's always the same, and all I can think is, "I'm finally home." Every night I go to sleep with Irvine in the cradle by the window and think, "please, let me wake up tomorrow to the sun peeking through the broken blinds, hit the same worn spot in the mattress that I hit every morning and have the same tangled spring poke me in the hip, let me wake up to Irvine's big blue eyes peeking at me blearily as the sun wakes him in that instant he doesn't realize it before he starts crying and the smell of freshly ground coffee hits my senses from downstairs as Kennedy begins to make his way through the tavern, pulling back the curtains to let the light in, sweeping the floor as I come downstairs and telling me that my usual breakfast is sitting on the bar. Please, Hyne, let me wake up every morning in this same stupid little bed." The same breakfast every morning, even that. Even that. Hyne Laguna! It all feels like some fevered dream. The one thing I thought I never wanted, and it's become the only thing I can't seem to live without. I'm happy here, really happy, for the first time since we were kids goofing off at the carnival. I guess I'll always miss you a little but, I just wanted you to know that you shouldn't worry about me. And also that I'm really sorry I'm not there to protect you, like I promised, but we'll always have forever, you and I. I'll never forget-I swear it.  
  
Love,  
  
your sis,  
  
Jace Kinneas  
  
Laguna stared at the signature and his hands shook, his eyes growing warm. . .and angry. 'Kinneas,' his mind snarled, the old hate coming back for a brief moment as he remembered everything that fucked up man had put Jace through.  
  
And he started to cry. So much that Jace had said in the letter made no sense to him, and wouldn't until much later. Praying to the gods that she'd wake up every morning to the same sunrise in the same bed, going to sleep to the same sunset and loving every dull moment. . .that just didn't sound like Jace at all, and he wasn't sure he understood it himself.  
  
After a long few minutes of uncontrolled and hysterical sobbing that had started out as just the barest whimper, he collected himself. "Jace, I want to see you," he whispered, looking up to the ceiling with blood-soaked eyes and saying, "Hyne, where is she? Where's my little Jace?"  
  
He raked his eyes over the letter again taking what hints he could on her location out of it. The name of a village that would do him no good since he doubted anyone outside of it had ever heard of it. Deserts of Eastern Centra, that was a pretty large area, but she'd traveled from Deling for maybe a week or so, you could only go so far on foot in that amount of time, even if you were running, right? And the last bit, the fragment that gave him some hope, was the sandstorm. He was sure with a little coaxing he could get some old weather data for around that time and find out where the storms had been. Better yet if he could get a small plane or some such and fly over the area until he spotted the steepled roofs she wrote about, but that last one would be nearly impossible. Anyway, he tucked the letter safely away. For now, he had a new mission to trouble over, didn't he? And he should definitely apologize to that General for his unprofessional behavior, or whatever. Lieutenant or no, Laguna had yet to get down all this military protocol nonsense. He knew it was there and that he was supposed to adhere to it, but knowing and doing were two very different things for the mostly careless young man.  
  
He got up, gunblade slamming absently into the crate, wiped his eyes, and headed out.  
  
In spite of the extremely bad, extremely dangerous mission and the fact that the trio was extremely under-qualified for it, Laguna couldn't help but bounce around with joy at the thought of it all.  
  
"Like a kid in a candy store," Ward commented to his braided friend as Laguna babbled on happily. "Who'd 'a thought Laguna would like sand this much." Raising his voice, he said, "Hey Laguna, ya know this isn't a trip to the beach, right?"  
  
Laguna stopped his excited babbling about the deserts of East Centra, and sandstorms, and blood souls and belhemels and grinned back at his friend. "Well of course not silly!" Laguna chirped. "There isn't any WATER in the desert! P'cha! Didn't they teach you anything in school Ward?". . . 'three, two, one. . .and liftoff,' Ward thought as Laguna, pretty much on cue started his giddy rant again.  
  
Kiros frowned. "How long have we known each other, man?" Kiros asked suddenly.  
  
Laguna had to put some serious thought into that one. "Two 'r three years I guess, why?" he answered.  
  
"Long enough for me to know that you're not as excited about blood souls as you pretend to be. What's really in East Centra that's got you so worked up?"  
  
Laguna's expression dropped and he began to fidget nervously.  
  
'Thought so,' Kiros noted mentally, giving Ward a smug look. Ward just shrugged.  
  
'Busted,' Laguna thought, and the mental note carried over in his expression and demeanor.  
  
"Well, ah, see. . ." Laguna began to stutter, unconsciously extricating the letter from underneath his uniform. "It's just. . ." he continued.  
  
"Man, just spit it out!" Ward protested. "The way you're goin' on you'd think your girlfriend was out there, or something."  
  
"My sister," Laguna blurted out suddenly, and his friends' expressions dropped in self-chastisement. 'Of course,' the thought pretty much simultaneously. After a nervous pause, Laguna said, "see, this letter says Jace is out there in a village hidden by a sandstorm, and I thought we might stumble upon it somehow, and I'd get to see her again."  
  
"Laguna, the chances of us accidentally stumbling onto one of those nowhere villages is like one in ten-thousand," Ward reminded his usually jubilant friend, hating to be the bearer of bad news.  
  
"So you're saying there's a chance!" Laguna almost squealed in his giddiness.  
  
"Not exactly what I. . ." Ward began to say.  
  
Meanwhile, Kiros was looking at Laguna's smiling face and thinking, 'three, two, one. . .lift off. Earth to Laguna Loire, come in Laguna Loire. No such luck Houston, looks like our astronaut is gone for good, one hundred percent, totally spaced out.'  
  
Yes, again on cue, Laguna had begun ranting happily this time about Jace and Irvine and the letter she wrote him, and. . .and. . .and. . .this one time. . .'  
  
Ward and Kiros groaned. It appeared to be story-time, again, and they listened absently as Laguna repeated one of his favorites, chuckling as the details and order changed even more with each telling. Kiros decided to shake Laguna back down to earth by asking, "wait, when did Jace get a horse?"  
  
Laguna floundered a bit in his story, loosing track of where he was and blinking his confusion off at Kiros. "What're ya talking about? Jace never had a horse," Laguna frowned, as if wondering if she had, and he'd forgotten and, for that matter, what in the wide world he'd said to make Kiros bring it up. Speak first, think later. It was a personality flaw, but Jace never noticed much, since she was the same way, and as a result, Laguna was only just beginning to realize that this was a problem. Breaking that bad habit could take. . .well. . .years, or longer even.  
  
"Nevermind," Kiros chuckled at the momentarily thoughtful look and Ward all out bellowed a harsh crack of laughter, finding it all way too funny to contain.  
  
In reply, Laguna just pouted at the pair, saying finally, "you're teasing me again, aren't you?"  
  
"What was your first clue?" Ward snickered.  
  
Jace blinked awake, meeting sleepy blue eyes. She smiled, feeling the usual spring poking into her hip and rubbed her temple slightly as she looked around the room.  
  
"Ma-muh?" the little boy squeaked.  
  
"Hm? What's up baby boy?" she asked, pushing herself up onto her elbow and brushing long bangs out of Irvine's eyes.  
  
"Okay?" he asked, a concerned expression on his face.  
  
"Ah yeah, I'm fine kiddo. The fairies are with me right now, that's all. They're pretty goofy, but mostly very quiet," she told him.  
  
"Faiwies?"  
  
"mhmn. It's hard to explain. They try to make you do silly things sometimes. Well, maybe one day you'll have fairies too," she teased. "Ready to go down for breakfast?"  
  
'Hyne, I hope not!' Irvine thought as he watched the scene, not quite missing the irony when he realized that instead of having fairies, he was one.  
  
Little Irvine nodded at his mother as she lifted him up into her arms after pulling on her boots.  
  
"How's the diaper kiddo?" she asked.  
  
The boy shrugged. "Okay," he answered. He was too young to say too many words yet, but he picked them up quickly, making Jace think he'd be a regular blabbermouth when he got older, and at the moment, the favorite in his limited vocabulary seemed to be "okay." It was right up there with "tofu", actually, though she couldn't, for the life of her, figure out why Irvine seemed to like the word "tofu" so much when he obviously had no love of the food it represented. Lately, everything that pleased him had become "okay" and everything he didn't like would get a wrinkled nose and the word "tofu". Her little boy. . .quite the character, really. But he understood well enough what she meant when she spoke to him, giving her a frown and the word "huh?" when he didn't. And Irvine was getting big. He'd be two years old next month.  
  
As she carried the boy, who had only just begun to learn how to walk, down the stairs, she said with a smile, just a certain odd feeling she had, "Let's mark Kennedy's calendar today," she said. "I think I'll mark it as "a good day." What about you Irvy?"  
  
Irvine appeared to put some serious thought into that before he finally decided, "chichi day".  
  
Jace beamed at the little boy, "Chicobo day it is. We'll write it in yellow and everything. It'll be fierce flawless."  
  
"Fierce Flawless," Irvine's muffled voice repeated with vaguest familiarity as he stirred back into consciousness, Squall blinking awake also, from the same time, but somewhere quite a distance away.  
  
"Jace used to say that all the time," Laguna said softly so as not to startle the young cowboy. 'Hyne, he really is so much like her,' Laguna thought.  
  
Squall's eyes widened, blinking, trying to figure out if what he was seeing was really there. But she was still there when his eyes had focused. Jace, the ghost version of Jace that he remembered from the other night. She was standing behind Irvine's chair, looking down at him and gesturing as if to brush the stray hairs from his face, and frowning slightly, as if in some sort of emotional pain, and Squall realized, it was because she couldn't touch him. All she could do was watch. Jace Kinneas, who lived every day of her life reduced to watching. Of course that would make her sad.  
  
As if feeling eyes on her, she turned her head toward Squall, and her expression furrowed and widened, shock on her transient features that seemed to shift with the reflection of light. He could only make out what parts of her were in shadow, her left arm, the right hand which had absently come up to her jacket collar, shoulders, head, and portions of her torso, but she leaned forward slightly, sqinting at him.  
  
"You can see me?" she asked.  
  
Squall nodded.  
  
"Can you hear me?" she asked.  
  
Squall nodded again.  
  
"Why?" she asked.  
  
Squall shrugged.  
  
Her expression was a sort of confusion that was mostly a mixture of something somewhere between hope and horror. She was about to speak again when Rinoa touched Squall shoulder. "Squall," the girl asked.  
  
"Shh!" he hissed.  
  
The harsh gesture made Irvine jump, disrupting Jace's image as it faded away into the full light from the window.  
  
Squall sighed. "Sorry Rinoa. I was just. . .I thought I saw something."  
  
Bringing his mind back to the most recent journey, he reached into his jacket's inner pocket. Sure enough, there it was. . .the letter. But he noticed something different about it, it was yellowed, faded at the edges, looked as if opening it too quickly would tear it and it would shatter into so much dust. But the Leviathan card had looked almost brand new. Confusion setting in, he dropped the letter onto the table and reached into the pocket where the card had been. It too seemed to have aged a bit, just some crinkling at the edges, but so much wear? It made no sense. The card hadn't left his pocket in two days.  
  
"Irvy, what's that in your lap?" Selphie asked.  
  
Blinking down, he saw the remnants of a faded blanket with little yellow ducks on it.  
  
"Hellfire!" he whispered. "It's my blankie! But it looks so. . ." he looked wide-eyed at Squall, the only one who he was sure would understand what he meant.  
  
"Yeah," Squall answered.  
  
'Something's happening. And I don't know if it's good or not,' Squall thought.  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
okay, that's all I have written. . . more to come. . .  
  
R&R please. 


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Well, here we are again, kits! Ready for another chapter of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer", an ff8 ghost story. As always, thanks so much to my reviewers. Now, to answer Ashura's question, I can't really say how much longer this will be. I would say I'm at least ¾ of the way finished and, at current moment, cannot imagine the fic surpassing 25 chapters, but I am not, presently, in the position to make a definitive response on the matter. As far as updates, my apologies, but thanks to having too many fics going at once and wanting to focus most of my energy on an original story that will probably cap off at about 300 pages, updates on my fanfics will be sporadic, at best, though I hope to finish this soon, I have an inuyasha fic that it makes more sense to finish up first since it is much shorter and less detailed than this story, which has become a sort of ff8 epic, in a way. I am however, thrilled that you like the story, especially since it is my first serious attempt at an ff8 fic. I want to write more ff8 fics in the future as well, and have ideas for other stories that will be vaguely linked to this one, in the respect that they will occur in the same "world" as this story, going instead into the family history of other characters, though they won't all be as supernatural as this one is turning out to be. However, at the moment, the only other ff8 fics I have are both yaoi.so.what're ya gonna do. As always, if you're patient, and if people keep reviewing and inspiring me, there will be more to come. I promise to finish the story whether I get reviews or not, but, the more reviews I get, the more quickly I am likely to continue.  
  
Irvine, thanks so much for liking my Irvine fic! Wow, that was a weird sentence, I feel like I just repeated myself! Hehe. Anyways, lil' irvy IS adorable! As far as Daddy Dearest, I really haven't decided yet. I don't really think the story can have any amount of closure without at least a small appearance from him, but that'll be towards the end I believe, probably in the last chapter or an epilogue. I haven't really decided that far in advance yet. But, no more revealing of the secrets! You'll just have to read and find out!  
  
Wow. . . that was uncharacteristically lucid for a Banshee rant. . . I must be tired. (Dre says I get serious when I'm tired. . .think I'll go to bed now. . .blah up at 5 am for work tomorrow. . .I do it all the time, and yet, it still seems so. . .icky!)  
  
Anyway, here's another chappy, hope you enjoy!  
  
~~~  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Eighteen  
  
~~~  
  
It was like a dream. It must have been a dream, or something very near to one. Laguna's parched throat wouldn't let him cry out, his eyes burned with tears that his body wanted to cry as he pointed, jaw gaping, at the tiny steepled rooftops in the distance. Was it really there, or just what he wanted to see. They'd fought through belhemels, blood souls, and probably one of the worst sandstorms in existence, and now, tiny steepled rooftops were becoming something larger, more distinct, something like, a small desert village in eastern Centra. No; Laguna couldn't help but hope.  
  
'Unh,' Squall thought, blinking up out of bright green eyes. And there she was, smiling down at him with that impish manner that she had. "Morning sleepyhead!" she teased. "How're you feeling?" she sighed. "You and your friends were in pretty bad shape when they carried you in here last week. I thought you'd never wake up," she rested her chin on her palms contently and said, "just like old times, huh?"  
  
"Jace, I finally found you," he said, his voice was very hoarse, but there was so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to tell her, so much he wanted to be told.  
  
"Hey, don't talk just yet, you're really dehydrated. I bet your throat hurts pretty badly. Anyway, there's someone who wants to meet you. Come on over and introduce yourself darlin'," she said.  
  
Laguna rolled his head to the side, still a little fuzzy from sleeping for a week, to see who Jace was talking to, when an auburn head popped up, grinning at him. The hair was shaggy and the boy had the brightest blue eyes. He stuck a thumb at his chest and announced, "Irvine!" Then, with less pride and more curiosity, the toddler cocked his head to the side and touched Laguna's black hair before asking, "uncle guuunnnii?" The letters were elongated and careful, deliberate, and frankly, downright adorable.  
  
It hit Laguna suddenly, this was Jace's son. . .this was his nephew (well, sorta). He smiled at the boy and nodded, flicking a thumb over Irvine's tiny button nose.  
  
Jace handed Laguna a glass of water and said, "your friends are already up, so just come downstairs when you're ready. Rest more, if you want to first," she told him before lifting Irvine up into her arms and going for the door. The last thing he heard before dozing off again, was Jace's voice saying, "see Irvy, I told you today would be a good day."  
  
"Chasing down sandstorms, jumping off cliffs, I'm beginning to think that you're suicidal," Squall commented wryly, looking over at Laguna, who was still blushing at having just been caught brushing the hair from Sqall's eyes when the boy, rather suddenly, awoke. Squall, still half-asleep, had crinkled his nose at the foreign feeling and absently swatted at Laguna's hand before he knew what he was doing.  
  
"The term Jace used was reckless, as if she was one to talk," Laguna returned idly, looking over to see how Irvine was holding up. The boy looked thoughtful, tired, and he wore a bittersweet smile on his face.  
  
"So you actually found her," Irvine said softly. "You have a lucky streak the size of a grown t-rexaur, don't you? Ever try gambling?" he tried for his lighthearted smirk, almost pulling it off, almost.  
  
"Only with my life," Laguna returned with a smile of his own before his expression, too strained, died off, and he sighed. "Truth is, I seem to have a pretty keen survival instinct. I manage to live through everything, even the things I didn't want to live through. But, anyway, yeah, I found her. That day was the happiest day I'd had in a very long time. But, we were on a mission, of course, so we didn't get to stay long. Of course, with my equipment, I was able to get the vague coordinates of Bella Maure, and I'd have a few chances to return, although, Kiros and Ward wouldn't be back here again, not until the very last time. But. . .that's enough for today, isn't it? It's getting awfully late."  
  
"Sure," Irvine nodded. "I think I'll take a walk, get some of this nice night air before I rest up, if it's all the same to everyone else.". .  
  
So, he walked. Not really very far to go, in a town three blocks wide, but he had to get away, at least for a little while. Away from this story, this dream, this life. Away from his thoughts.  
  
'My own father. . .but, can I blame him? For wanting to be loved back? How long was it that I lived my own life with that same wish in my heart. An image of Selphie in her little yellow jumper and contagious grin flashed across his vision. 'Please, Hyne, I'm not like that, am I? Please don't let me ever be like that.'  
  
Looking up at the stars, he found them blocked by a stone smile and windblown waves of hair. "Hi mom," he said softly. "I. . . I'm sorry, that you. . .hurt. . .I'm sorry that you were in pain and I. . .never noticed." He looked down at the his feet and then looked up again, chocking back a sob. "Mom, I love you. Just. . .thought you should know."  
  
Irvine looked away from that face, clutching a hand to his heart.  
  
"I love you too, Irvine. More than anything. Until the end of Eternity, and Longer, remember? Do you, Irvy? Do you remember. . .our promise?" Jace's spirit smiled softly through the pain in her own heart, but Irvine couldn't see her. Couldn't hear her. Only Squall could. . . huh? "Squall. You startled me a bit. It's not polite to sneak up on people, you know," she said.  
  
"I didn't mean to," Squall said, looking from Irvine to Jace's spirit.  
  
"Huh?! Oh, Squall. You didn't mean to what, man?" Irvine asked, voice cracking as he tried to force his usual easy manner.  
  
Squall just frowned at him. "To. . .sneak up on you."  
  
"Oh. S'okay. I'm used to you doing that by now," Irvine said.  
  
Jace clutched her chest. "Squall, he. . .hurts so much. I can feel how much he hurts. Tell him. . .tell him to. . ." Jace fumbled over her words, she was overwhelmed by something - pain. "Tell him to stop hurting, Squall, please? Make him stop hurting."  
  
"As if it's that easy," Squall mumbled.  
  
"What are you talking about?" Irvine asked, marveling at how odd Squall was and moving, unintentionally disrupting the woman's spirit again, as she vanished into the air.  
  
"Nothing. Are you alright?"  
  
Irvine frowned again. "No. You?"  
  
Squall shook his head. "No."  
  
And they stood in companionable silence for a long while before Irvine said, "do you think there are still fish in this lake?"  
  
Squall shrugged. "Stranger things have happened."  
  
"Let's find out."  
  
"huh?"  
  
"Aw come on Commander! Aren't ya up for some midnight fishing?"  
  
"Hn. Where are we gonna get poles?"  
  
"Ah. . . oh yeah," Irvine laughed noncomitally. "Well, we'll just have to do it the old-fashioned way. Think those leather pants o'yours can handle it?"  
  
Squall looked down at his pants, then at Irvine's and cocked an eyebrow.  
  
"Righty-o! Guess mine can't either huh? Guess we'll just have to take them off then!" he beamed.  
  
Normally, Squall wouldn't humor the miscreant cowboy, but, tonight, he wanted to, needed to, really. So, in the middle of the night, the two SeeDs waded knee deep into the lake and went fishing in their boxer shorts. And, considering the very wet wrestling match that seemed to lead directly out of it, Squall couldn't help but laugh. They were soaked, sandy, lying on the bank, boxer shorts clinging indecently to their thighs, hair mussed, Irvine's hair loose as he wrung it out, sitting Indian style and appearing rather the drowned rat, Squall searching the immediate vicinity for a negligent t-shirt that some unnamed cowboy had decided to use as a sopping projectile, and neither young man with any fish to show for their efforts. Ballots counted and votes in, all in all, it was a good night. Something they needed, and both knew, secretly, that a bond had been formed that would not be easily broken, and which would lead to places unknown that time alone could predict.  
  
And, not far off, Laguna sat in a moonlight windowsill, watching them with a bittersweet smile on his face. "Look at them," he whispered. "That's my family down there. Such strong boys. Jace would be proud of them."  
  
"I am proud, 'guni. I really am," the ghost said softly, unheard behind Laguna's shoulder. "I'd like to watch over them forever, really. But I'm just so tired of standing still like this, unable to help them, unable to do anything, really. I want something to happen, to do something, to come to life once again and protect them, or to, once and for all, die all the way. I'm sorry that I'm putting you through all this, all of you, but, I need this. To close my eyes, or to open them, but Crow and I. . .it's not in our nature to be in stasis. It never has been." She sighed, strange black feathers floating around her spiritual form. "Squall, Irvine, I'm sorry. Please just let me use you a little while longer. Please allow me to show you just a little bit more. . ."  
  
And Laguna, hearing an odd cry on the wind, turned quickly, to find nothing but empty air behind him. He sighed, taking a deep breath. Daisies. He'd know that scent anywhere. Daisies and peaches. "This whole town - this whole town smells like her," he whispered before lying back and closing his eyes, drifting, once again, into dreams of times long past, but unable to be forgotten.  
  
Irvine crinkled his nose and said "tofu!" with a determined stomp. Laguna looked up at Jace with a slightly perplexed, but also, amused expression.  
  
"Ah, well, see, Irvy doesn't like animal crackers," Jace informed him, tipping her hat back slightly. Attention successfully diverted, Irvine started hopping up and down as his mother sat down, trying to grab the hat, which he couldn't quite reach. "Okay! Okay! Okay!" he protested, hopping and pouting at not being able to get his hands on the object he desired.  
  
Laguna burst out into a fit of laughter. "I think he wants your hat, sis."  
  
Jace scratched the back of her head, "ah, yeah, he really likes this hat. Not sure why. C'mere squirt," she says, lifting the boy into her lap. "Now, if I let ya wear my hat, you gotta eat this much of your sandwich," she told him, striking a deal as she picks up half of the boy's lunch.  
  
"Okay!" Irvine said, reaching for the hat.  
  
Jace adjusted him on her lap and flipped the hat over onto his head. With two small, chubby hands, he held the black rim up and opened his mouth when Jace brought the sandwich up for him to eat. "That's it. You're a good kid Irvy."  
  
And for a moment, Laguna really wanted to stay here like this, with his sister and nephew forever, just like this. A simple, boring life of fishing and fixing shudders, cleaning drains, sweeping floors, retrieving lost kittens from trees, but damn, as long as Jace and Irvine were there, it didn't matter, as long as he had them, he could be happy.  
  
But it wasn't meant to last. By the end of the week, they'd gotten their signal out and were being picked up, ready for a short lull before their next mission.  
  
Laguna woke to the sun shining in his eyes through the open window. "Things would have been so much different, if I'd just stayed, but at that time, I believed, I owed it to all of us to accomplish my dream. I really was awfully naïve. What would you think of me now, sis? Laguna Loire, President of Esthar. . . it's a great joke, isn't it?"  
  
And there she was, brushing a hand across his face, as if she could touch him, wearing that bittersweet smile again, and she said, "I'd think: 'I always knew my big brother would make something of himself. I always knew my 'guni would grow up to be someone important.' That's what I'd think. All the same, you're right, it IS a little funny."  
  
She chuckled.  
  
Laguna startled at a cool breeze on his face. It almost felt like the outline of a hand, but it was gone as quickly as it arrived, and with Laguna's movement, so was Jace.  
  
Irvine brushed his hair and tied it back into it's ever-present thong. Not far from him, thoughtfully, Squall hung his jacket on a coat rack. It was just far too hot to wear it today, as naked as he felt without it.  
  
"Irvine?"  
  
"Mn."  
  
"If I tell you something, you won't freak, right?" he asked quietly.  
  
"Why would I freak?"  
  
"Because I'll sound crazy."  
  
"Just spit it out, Commander. We've been through a lot together lately, so you can just tell me whatever you want."  
  
Squall was glad to hear that. He needed to know that Irvine felt that way too.  
  
"I saw her," he said softly. "Jace."  
  
"Huh?" Irvine blinked, then seeing the gravely serious expression on Squall's face, he said, "uh, let me sit down before you say anything else."  
  
Squall nodded and waited for Irvine to sit down next to him on the edge of the bed before speaking again. "Twice. Once after we woke up one time, and once, last night, standing next to you. Her spirit, or ghost, or whatever, and I can hear her too, the things she says. She's sad, really sad, and there's blood on her jacket. Each time I see her, there's more blood than the time before."  
  
"But. . .what do we do?" Irvine's lip quivered as he stared at Squall's profile, trying not to cry at the thought of his mother sad, or in pain.  
  
Squall shook his head from one side to the other and said, "I don't know, Irvine. I still don't have any answers, just like those days, with Adel, and with Rinoa."  
  
And Irvine, bit his lower lip hard, barely muffling a sob. "Mom. Momma," he whispered, wrapping his arms around himself and shivering as tears fell down his face.  
  
'It's just, like that day, on the clock tower,' Squall remembered. 'I didn't know what to do for him then either.'  
  
"Hold him, Squall."  
  
Squall looked up to find Jace's figure a few feet away, one arm dangling, the other wrapped around her stomach awkwardly. There WAS more blood, he was sure of it.  
  
"Hold him, for me? Please. He needs someone to hold him," she said, as if asking a favor.  
  
Squall gave a curt nod and, tensely, pat Irvine's back, gasping with surprise at the response, the other boy falling into his arms, burying his head against his shoulder and letting out freer, gasping sobs, whimpering, "momma!" at odd intervals.  
  
Squall looked up at Jace, who stared at Irvine for a long few moments before turning her eyes on Squall again. "Thank you, Squall. And also. . .please, forgive me. . .for being selfish. It won't be much longer. I promise, not much longer. . . I can. . .almost feel it," she told him, the last part a whisper before her form dissipated with the dark clouds that came to hang over the view from the window.  
  
Squall turned, rubbing small circles on Irvine's back, something he seemed to have the vaguest memory of, something that, once, had made him feel better. Something that, he realized, Laguna had done for him not long ago, probably unconsciously, but that, also, had meant so much to him at that time, and even now.  
  
Irvine hiccupped back his last sob. "Squall?" he asked, sitting up. "Let's become even stronger, okay. Let's become at least as strong as she was. I think that's how we should honor her. I think that's a way she wouldn't mind being honored."  
  
And after a moment's hesitation, Squall nodded. "I think, for once, you've said exactly the right thing."  
  
```````  
  
Okay, Chapter Eighteen down! Yay!!!! That didn't take too terribly long. It's not a super-long chapter, but, oh well. Hope you like it. R&R.  
  
Until next time, Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


	19. Chapter Nineteen

*Banshee cowers away from her muse, Xavier, who is currently glowering at her, hovering over her with arms crossing his chest and insisting she write instead of doing that other thing she's supposed to do, like eat lunch* He's so scary. *Looks longingly at her half-eaten mac n'cheese, and with a sigh, checks the time and puts her fingers on the keyboard*  
  
Tehe! Okay, so actually, today was a really great day and for the first time in a long time, I don't actually NEED Xavier to feel inspired! It's a good day to be alive-it really is. Every day is a good day to be alive (and don't you dare forget it!).  
  
Irvine, I'm sorry you're so shocked! But, durnit! I can't let this thing go on and on forever, or I'd never have any time for any of my other ideas! I have like 4 original works going, two Inuyasha arcs, this story/arc (I want to do Selphie next I think.). Plus, I had so much fun writing "Stay with Me" a ff8 yaoi fic of mine, that I want to write another with that pairing, an epic like this story is! And I mean, sheesh, I've got to be over 100 pages with this by now, easily! Ooo, and I read a great fic a lil' while ago that inspired me, so I want to write a Squall/Irvine fic. (I dig all fiction, hetero, yaoi, yuri, doesn't matter, but fact is, though this fic is standard pairings, the odder the pair-up the better, as far as I'm concerned!) Oh, and more GW fics too, I want to write some more odd- couple gw fics! *grins* So, anyway, if this was all I had to do, maybe forever and ever would be okay, but alas, it will have to end at some point, and I can see the end approaching, so. . .bleh.  
  
Lunatic Pandora1. Something you thought you'd never see Squall do? Would that be fishing in his underwear or giving Irvine a hug (as awkward as he felt doing it)? LOL!!! I know at first glance, it seems ooc for him, but I think given the direction the story has taken, it really suited the moment. I mean, comeon, more than anything, you gotta admit, Squall is a totally damaged individual. So I decided a few "human" moments would not at all be a bad thing to do with him. Besides it was SOOO FUN to write! Anyways, thanks!  
  
Sariph21. Thanks so much! Everytime someone says something like that I get a total ego boost. Haha! *watches her ego swelling* Gah! Bad waffle! Oh wait, that's eggo, isn't it *blushes and giggles uncomfortably* Anyway, *scratches back of head* I seriously do appreciate it. My reviewers make me feel like bothering to write fanfiction at all is actually worth it, because there are times that I start to wonder, ya know?  
  
Anyways! Thanks so much to all of you. I reeaaallllyyy really appreciate your input!  
  
Tonight, it rained buckets. . .and I danced. But I still don't own FFVIII and never will.  
  
And now, on with "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer". . .  
  
````````  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Nineteen  
  
````````  
  
(in the previous chapter: Irvine hiccupped back his last sob. "Squall?" he asked, sitting up. "Let's become even stronger, okay. Let's become at least as strong as she was. I think that's how we should honor her. I think that's a way she wouldn't mind being honored."  
  
And after a moment's hesitation, Squall nodded. "I think, for once, you've said exactly the right thing.")  
  
`````````  
  
"I danced in the rain tonight," Jace said with a smile.  
  
"Is that so important?" Laguna asked, loading his gun.  
  
"It's the most important thing there is."  
  
Laguna hadn't understood it then and he didn't understand it any more now. So why had he thought of it so suddenly as he ate his eggs, watching the odd chemistry in the air between his son and nephew this morning.  
  
It was Zell who finally commented on their odd behavior. "Okay, you two are acting weird, what's the big secret?" he looked at Irvine and leaned in, trying awkwardly to death glare Squall into spilling the beans.  
  
Instead, Irvine said evenly, "we went fishing," and Squall snickered slightly, his mouth spreading into an uncharacteristic grin, before a thunderous echo of laughter exploded out of him and sent Irvine chuckling, then laughing right along with him, pulling Selphie against his chest in his mirth.  
  
"What's so damn funny?" Zell insisted. "Why are you laughing?!"  
  
"Because I can, Zell," Squall answered between snickers as his random fit of laughter started to die down, and smiling, said softly, "because I can."  
  
"You aren't yourself today, Mr. Leonheart," Rinoa said, using her mock- professional tone.  
  
"Quite the contrary, Rin. I'm more myself today than I've ever been." And acting on impulse, he took her hand and kissed the back of it as if a nobleman of some sort.  
  
Rinoa gasped and giggled. "What HAS gotten into you?" she prodded.  
  
"Surprised?" he asked.  
  
"What did you two do last night, really?" she insisted.  
  
With a sweet, but knowing smile, and an exchanged glance between the boys, Squall said evenly, almost flatly, as he let go and leaned back in his chair, "we went fishing."  
  
"Is fishing really such a big deal?" Selphie asked skeptically, looking up at Irvine.  
  
"It's the biggest deal there is darlin'," the cowboy said, his voice taking on a reverent tone as he repeated himself, "the biggest deal in the whole damn world."  
  
And finally, Laguna understood. It was something about their reckless nature, and the need to feel alive.  
  
He realized suddenly, they were waiting for something, for him to continue, so he swallowed down a bite of egg, took a sip of coffee and began.  
  
"I was really sorry to leave, at that time. I didn't want to go, but I felt like I owed it to myself, and especially to Jace, to fulfill my dream. I wanted, more than anything, to be someone that she could be proud of, and you too, Irvine, but things rarely go according to plan."  
  
He sighed slightly. "But I would come back. Once more when I was given a week off. . .okay, so technically I was suspended from active duty, anyway. . .the other time I returned, it was because the military had contacted me after I left for good, and because I needed her help."  
  
And suddenly, Laguna could smell daisies and peaches on the air again. He sighed. "She's been dead a long time now, but damn if this town doesn't still smell like her."  
  
"That's because she's still here. She never left," Squall said quietly, looking at the figure standing behind Laguna's chair like a quiet sort of strength, the ghost-like fingers making some of his hair wisp as she brushed it with her hand, trying to comfort him. Her words came back to him. "I can almost feel it," she had said. And now her fingers were moving his hair, just barely, hardly noticeable, but it DEFINITELY was her. And there were shadows in her eyes, a story written in the blood that dripped down her right arm. Now, he noticed, for the very first time, a pistol hanging loosely in her grip there. One of her pistols, the ones depicted in the statue.  
  
"Adel was running wild at that time. How could I deny my little brother whatever help he needed? He was so worried, about the world, about us, and more than that, I wanted there to exist a world where my little boy didn't have to be afraid. So of course I went with him, of course I helped him. How could I not. And also, there was something about a little girl. Laguna always had a weakness for children, and this one was practically family to him, it seemed. He was worried. He didn't want her to be hurt, and I could never stand seeing him frown, so I did the only thing I could." Jace's eyes turned sadly on Irvine as a tear rolled down her cheek. "I gave him up. My little boy. My shining star." But her words faded in Squall's mind as a familiar feeling overtook him and blearily, he noticed Irvine's eyes fluttering before he dropped from consciousness.  
  
'Jace? Jace where are you?!' Squall called out.  
  
'M-mom?' Irvine asked, hearing Squall call her name in the blackness. 'I'm so sorry boys. Just allow me to use you like this a little longer. Please.' She spoke, but neither could see her here, in this blackness.  
  
'It was you doing this, all along?' Squall asked.  
  
'No. The first time was Ellone. Imagine my surprise when I found out, being dead, I could do a very similar thing. Perhaps, one day, you'll. . .forgive me. . .' and her voice faded as the scene came into view.  
  
They recognized it immediately. It was the orphanage by the sea, but it was obvious that Laguna and Jace had never been here before.  
  
Irvine could feel the little him clinging to his mother's leg, and Squall was vaguely able to register the words coming from Laguna's mouth. "Are you sure about this?"  
  
"It's not the time for being selfish, 'guna. Crow and I have been taking it easy for way too long."  
  
"You never did tell me how you ended up with that GF, you know," Laguna informed her.  
  
"I. . .don't really know. Maybe I died," she shrugged, not as flippantly as was her habit, but more of a "just drop it" sort of shrug. "Now isn't the time. If we live through all this, THEN we can look for the answers and stories, but not before, Laguna. There's just too much else to worry about right now."  
  
"Momma?" little Irvine asks nervously, shifting from foot to foot. His eyes ask the obvious questions, 'why are we here? Where are we? And, why are you sad?'  
  
Jace kneels down in front of Irvine and brushes his hair back with her fingers while she speaks. "I have to go away for a little while, Irvine. A lot of people are counting on me and your Uncle Laguna to do something important, but we'll be back, okay? I promise."  
  
Irvine clutched her neck tightly. "Don't go!" he begged.  
  
And Jace? Well Jace squeezed back, just as tightly, biting her lower lip to hold back the tears, before pulling away and saying, "I have to, Irvy. I don't want to, but, I've GOT to. Maybe one day, you'll understand."  
  
Sure, Irvine understood. He'd done a lot of things he hadn't wanted to do because of the war. There was really only one difference between them in that respect: Irvine had survived. And that was a bitter pill to swallow.  
  
"Be good for Matron Edea, while I'm away, okay kit?"  
  
Irvine nodded and sniffled.  
  
Laguna was the one to approach the woman on the stairs. 'Let them have a few moments alone,' he thought, as heart-wrenching as it all was. There were really two purposes to him being here.  
  
"Irvine's a good boy," he told her weakly, biting his lower lip.  
  
"I'm sure he is. He'll be fine, Mr. Loire. I promise."  
  
"Jace or I, we'll come back for him, if we can, when this is all over." He shook his head with more determination. "We're coming back for him," he said steadily. "So just, you know, look after him for a little while."  
  
Edea smiled and nodded. How many times had she heard something similar in these past weeks? She didn't want to count them. And how many were likely to return as they'd promised? She didn't want to think about that at all.  
  
Jace came over, a sniffling Irvine holding her hand and said, "Irvine, this is Matron Edea. She's going to watch over you for a little while, just like Kennedy did when I was fixing the roof or something, okay?"  
  
"M-my name's Irvine Kinneas," Irvine said softly, still clutching tightly to his mother's hand.  
  
"Laguna," Jace said. "I know you want to ask her about that other thing, so just go ahead. I'll bring Irvine inside so he can get to know the. . .the other kids. . ." she swallowed. "If that's alright."  
  
Edea nodded. "I think that's a good idea."  
  
But Edea didn't know anything.  
  
There were only a few other children there, at that time: a young blonde boy called Seifer, and a cute little brunette named Squall who reminded her so much of Laguna it was a little freaky. Not that he looked all that much like Laguna, really, there was just something about him that she couldn't place. When they entered, Squall was crying because Seifer was making fun of him and had stolen his toy car.  
  
'Gotta be strong, like momma,' little Irvine recited in his head over and over again. And, biting his lower lip, he slipped out of his mother's grip and went over slapping the bully, unexpectedly, upside the head. "Leave 'im alone," he insisted.  
  
Squall peeked up at him through the tears, and Seifer just sort of gaped at him. 'He'll be okay.' Jace knew it, at that moment. She watched the boys for a few more moments before feeling a presence behind her shoulder. She looked up and leaned back. It was Laguna. The tired expression, at that time, it made him look so old. 'Do I look that old too?' she wondered.  
  
"Time to go," she asked.  
  
Laguna nodded. "We only have so much time, and there's a lot to do."  
  
Jace nodded. "I want to tell him I'm leaving, but he's so content right now, I don't want to ruin that," she whispered. "Let's just go. He already knows. . .I'm coming back for him."  
  
Laguna nodded and the pair turned to leave. But the motion distracted Irvine's attention from Squall and his toy car, as he sat Indian style across from the other boy.  
  
"Momma!" he leaped up, clenching his fists to keep himself from running to her. "Your promise! Don't forget!" he insisted, and vaguely, through the blinding sunlight, he could see her tip her hat at him before the door closed between them.  
  
"She won't come back, you know," Seifer mocked.  
  
"She will too!" Irvine insisted. "She promised."  
  
"Adults always make promises to kids that they've got no intention of keeping. She's not coming back. She hates you. She never wants to see your ugly face again," Seifer insisted with mocking tones.  
  
And Irvine, angry, punched the other boy in the nose. "She's coming back," he said. "My momma, loves me. It's not like you. Nobody'd ever love a jerk like you, Seifer!" he huffed and then sat back down on the floor with Squall.  
  
Yeah, Irvine would always remember that day. . .the one and only day he'd made Seifer Almsay cry.  
  
Jace sat in the car silently, her expression haggard. She knew, if she said one word, she'd lose it, start sobbing, and she didn't want that.  
  
For a long time, Laguna said nothing either, but it wasn't in his nature to stay silent for long. "Jace. . ."  
  
Jace looked up at him with those wide eyes she had and her lips started quivering, moisture beginning to form in the corners of her eyes. Her head dropped into his shoulder and hiccupping sobs began to escape. "I. . .'guna. My little boy. . . . . .it hurts so much. . .my heart. . .so much."  
  
Laguna parked the car and wrapped his arms around her. "I know, sis. I know. It isn't good to keep it all bottled up though, you know. That's why. . .I'm so sorry Jace. I shouldn't have gotten you involved, but I. . .I'm sorry."  
  
And these last words came out a whisper as both boys came to, Irvine wiping his eyes of the tears that had begun to fall, even while he slept. "Momma," he whispered.  
  
Squall looked across the table at Irvine with some strange expression that had never been seen on his face again, his brow furrowed and he swallowed hard. "I just remembered you," Squall said softly. "You. . .hit him. I can't believe I forgot."  
  
And through his tears, Irvine chuckled. "Yeah, uh, guess I did."  
  
Through the sorrow and grief, through all the pain and loss, the boys found themselves laughing again at a jewel of a memory that tumbled out of all that came before, and when Squall got up to bring some of the dishes into the kitchen, which had become a habit these past few days, something he did with his father, as small and silly as it was, he tripped over a rusted toy car that was on the floor, lying there with only three wheels still attached.  
  
"Shit!" he cursed as he fell backwards, surprised at the lack of impact the fall had.  
  
"Squall?!" Laguna asked, looking down at him from over his son's head as Squall realized that he was half on the ground, with his head and shoulders caught against Laguna's chest where the man had fallen to his knees to catch him.  
  
"I'm okay," he said, not sounding as certain as he intended, a little stunned from the sudden fall, as he sat up.  
  
Irvine picked the car up from where it rolled and strolled over to Squall, meaningfully, holding out the object in his open palm for the other to take. Squall did, and smiled softly, just like on that day. 'How could I have forgotten you, Irvine? In those early days at Matron's you were like a brother to me. Before Ellone, and before the others, before Selphie. How did we end up falling away from one another like that, so easily. Well, I won't forget again. I promise,' Squall decided. 'I won't forget about you again.' He put the car in his pocket, another little reminder of a life that was shared, a world that could have been, and another important memory that the GF had taken away from them. And here was Jace who was asking to be forgiven? 'Right, if anything, we should be thanking her for giving us our lives back.'  
  
And Jace, hiding in the sunlight of the window, winced. 'I guess I put that in a bad spot,' she thought as Squall took his spill.  
  
'Gee, ya think?' a voice came from beside her, causing Jace to jump slightly. 'Oh! Raine, it's just you.'  
  
'Hmn. What are you planning to do, when you're finished telling your story, Jace? What do you think will happen?'  
  
'I don't know. . .something. . .extraordinary. At least I hope so. I can't take this anymore. At the very least, I hope they'll tear down that god-awful statue! What were they thinking? I mean, really. So many people died in the war, so they make a statue of one woman? To honor one woman? All I did was fire the final shot, and from what I hear, even that wasn't enough to finish her off for good.' Jace sighed. 'It almost feels as if I wasted my death. Anyway, it's time for something to change, don't you think? Can't you feel it in the air? I really want to protect them, you know. Don't you?'  
  
'Sure. But we're dead. There isn't really much we can do,' Raine insisted.  
  
'Well. . .maybe. . .but I'm still going to try.'  
  
'You're totally untamable, as usual. I see Crow has come back to you,' Raine commented of the feathers floating around Jace's bloody form.  
  
'Huh? Oh, yeah,' Jace said, lifting one of the feathers out of the air and brushing it under her nose. 'It something about this place. This desert wind stirs his heart. Mine too.'  
  
'Doesn't that hurt?' Raine asked of the bleeding wounds covering Jace's form, the now bruised and slightly swollen cheek.  
  
'No. But. . .almost. . .' Jace answered reverently. 'I can almost feel it.'  
  
Raine sighed. 'You're so odd. Maybe it's because you died in such an unnatural way. Or maybe it's just. . .because you really are the type of person they all think you are. But, Jace, are all heroes as odd as you?'  
  
'Don't be ridiculous. I'm not a hero. Just a woman. I've never been anything else. If you stick around, you'll see. I think the end of my story makes it entirely clear. I died selfishly. But seriously, tell me. If there was a way that you could watch over them, be sure they were okay all the time, no matter what the cost, would you do it, Raine?'  
  
"You know something, don't you?"  
  
"I have. . . a strong suspicion. Now just answer the question."  
  
"Yes. I would do it."  
  
"I was hoping you would say that. So please, stick around a while longer, if you can."  
  
And with some careful deliberation, Raine nodded. '. . .I don't think it's the desert wind that stirs Crow's heart, Jace. I think, maybe, it's just you.'  
  
Jace smiled sweetly, a secret on the air between them that she wasn't sharing. 'Crow is. . .someone who has loved me, since before I was born.'  
  
```````  
  
hokay! Well, that's chapter nineteen! We're getting real, genuine plot now! At least, plot for the present, rather than just the past. Jace has a secret! Irvine is at the orphanage! What's going to happen next?!? Well, *leans in and whispers* "I'm not telling!"  
  
Anyways, hope you like! R&R. Until next time kits!  
  
Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


	20. Chapter Twenty

Aw, Irvine, I'm sowwy! You're making me feel bad now. *sniffles back* But. . .eesh. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm fairly positive that Irvine will be IN all the other stories I plan to write. And if it makes you feel even better still . . .I have a pretty title image for this story!. If you want it, gimme an email addy and I'll send you the link to it! (No, I didn't draw the images. I can't draw. *frowns* But I CAN use photoshop to make pretty graphics! *beams*) Okay, not much consolation, I know, but, every lil' bit helps, right? . . .well, right?  
  
```````  
  
"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Twenty  
  
```````  
  
Laguna awoke with a start and a scream.  
  
"Dad?" Squall asked as the older man looked around, trying to get his bearings. 'Oh, right, we were fishing by the lake. I must have fallen asleep.'  
  
"I'm. . .I'm okay," Laguna squeaked out. "Just. . .a bad dream. . .memory, whatever."  
  
"It makes you sad, remembering all this."  
  
"It's good for me," Laguna returned. "For us. Look at us Squall. We're fishing together. Talking. Without Jace, how long would it take for this to happen. Would it ever happen? Would I have to die before you acknowledged me? In the end, I'm grateful for the opportunity."  
  
"Don't say things like that," Squall scowled at his father.  
  
"Even if they're true?" he asked wearily.  
  
"Especially if they're true," Squall replied, almost a whisper. "I spent a lot of my life without a father. I don't want to think about that sort of thing now."  
  
"Sorry. I'm just starting to feel my age Squall, that's all. I don't have the energy to be as goofy and immature as I used to be I guess. Like Zell," he chuckled at his joke. That kid really did remind him of himself, at one time, as different as they were. They both had that awkwardness, an openness that often led to mistakes. "Maybe I'll get it back once this is all over, and you can start calling me a moron again, like you used to."  
  
"I only call 'em like I see 'em," Sqaull drolled, an odd habit he'd recently seemed to pick up from Irvine unintentionally.  
  
Laguna smirked wearily. "And I wouldn't have you any other way. Catch anything?"  
  
"A diary. . . . And a boot. I'm currently endeavoring to catch the other one," he said flatly, making Laguna blink at the oddly-toned joke, unsure if his son was being extremely serious, or just a smart ass, when he heard Irvine intervene from beside the other young man, commenting, "I'm going to catch it first though. Just you watch."  
  
"Heh. You couldn't catch a cold. If you fish that boot out of the lake, I'll eat the set," Squall mocked.  
  
"You're on flower boy!" Irvine snickered.  
  
"I TOLD you! Rinoa bought them! I only wear them sometimes so I don't hurt her feelings," Squall grumbled. "She's so emotional."  
  
He probably should have thought about EXACTLY what boxer shorts he was wearing before agreeing to a midnight "fishing" experience with Irvine Kinneas.  
  
"She's a woman, what did you expect? Drag racing?" Irvine poked fun at Squall's incompetence.  
  
"Whatever, at least I didn't sleep with a blankie until I was ten years old. . .a blankie named "Mr. Duck," no less. . ." Squall chided.  
  
"Nope," Irvine noted. "You had a teddy bear. . . named "Fluffy.""  
  
"W-well! I thought it was an accurate description!" Squall sputtered.  
  
Irvine chuckled as a blush danced across Squall's cheeks. His father did NOT need to know this! "Whatever. Shut up! . . .or I'm going to start quacking at you in public, and tell embarrassing stories when people ask what I'm doing."  
  
Fishing rod forgotten, Irvine tackled Squall suddenly in a headlock, saying, "whatever Fluffy, I can give as good as I get, and don't you forget it."  
  
And next thing Laguna knew, he was watching an all out wrestling match between the two young men which ended up with sputtering, splashing, and soggy suede and leather. He couldn't help but grin at their antics, and the fact that they'd totally forgotten they had an audience.  
  
Unable to contain himself any longer as the boys continued to abuse one another and bicker, Laguna burst out in a fit of hysterical laughter, at which the action stopped, Squall with his hand around Irvine's ponytail, and Irvine just about to give Squall the WORST power wedgie of all time, as they stared at Laguna, and both colored crimson, realizing what sort of antics they'd stumbled into, and in PUBLIC no less, before they climbed out of the lake and moved to return to their quiet boot fishing, when Irvine scowled.  
  
"What?" Squall asked after a silence.  
  
"What are the chances of you catching my fishing pole, you think?" Irvine asked, watching the little red and white bobber drifting halfway across the lake.  
  
"How much time do you plan on sitting here?" Squall asked drolly.  
  
"Right. Well then, I vote for dry clothes and lunch."  
  
Squall nodded and handed his pole over to Laguna before getting up and brushing himself off a bit. "Let us know if you catch the boot," he commented before they left Laguna alone, fishing by the lake. He looked up at the statue, smelling once again the familiar scent of peaches and daisies in the air, which he only seemed to notice when he was thinking of her. He sighed. "And you still haunt my every dream," he whispered softly. "Even now."  
  
Jace crinkled her nose as she looked at the statue. "I still hate that damn thing," she commented, sitting down carefully in the grass beside Laguna. "And I still remember this. Just like old times, 'guni. Me like this, you like that. Always fishing for some treasure, thinking, maybe one day, you'd actually catch a fish from this dead lake. I miss. . .being able to touch you, to hug you after being apart for so long, but I guess I don't mind. I have all the time in the world to wait for you to come back to us."  
  
She looked up at a gray shadow not far behind her left shoulder. "He's changed a lot, gotten older, but he's still the same Laguna that I used to drag to the carnival. He's still the same Laguna you married too, I'll bet, right?" she asked.  
  
Raine nodded. "He is," she said softly. "He always will be."  
  
Jace stood up. "I hate to push the boys so hard, really, but I think it's time to show them. . .what came next."  
  
"Ellone. . .and. . .the war," Raine reflected sadly.  
  
Jace nodded, thumb tracing over the gun in her hand. "Yeah. . ." she replied sadly. "The war."  
  
"Then, your story is nearly complete, isn't it?"  
  
"It would seem that way. I only hope. . .that it's enough. You saw them today, didn't you!?!" she remembered excitedly. "Wrestling and teasing, like brothers. Like they've always been brothers."  
  
"If nothing else, you've shown them the family they didn't know they had. Maybe that'll be enough to let you pass out of limbo."  
  
"I don't think it is, Raine. Because, as much as I hate this stasis. The idea of being all the way dead is really scary to me, you know. Because, I still want to protect them. So much. I still have so much love in my heart. I can't feel the pain, really, but I can't let go of it either, the pain I want to have, the pain of loving someone so completely. I wonder if I'll be able to endure it. . .the pain of. . .letting go. Can my soul survive that? What happens to a soul when it dies? Will I. . .stop existing altogether. I know it's a little late to be second-guessing, when I've set this all into motion and all, but. . .that's not really what I want. I don't think that's what I want. I just want. . .to protect them."  
  
Raine sighed. "You're just as reckless in death as you were in life."  
  
Jace lifted her left hand and scratched the back of her head, an embarrassed smile on her face. "Haha. Yeah, guess some things never change, huh?"  
  
And the two spirits laughed at their private joke. "How are you ever going to protect them, huh? Who's going to protect you?"  
  
Jace bit her lower lip. "Can't say I've got an answer to that one, unlike SOME people I know, who seem to have an answer to EVERYTHING," she accused.  
  
Raine smiled softly. "Fine. If you promise to protect them, then I guess I'll just have to promise to protect you, for their sake. You'll only get yourself into trouble if I don't, and since you're Laguna's sister, I guess it's only natural, since I wouldn't want him to be sad."  
  
```````  
  
". . .it makes the most sense that way," Jace was saying. "Take Kiros and Ward to Esthar and find Ellone. I'll take Xan and Maura with me ahead to follow the trail. You'll probably meet up with us before things come to a head anyway, but even if you don't, you shouldn't worry. We'll be fine. I know she's strong and all, but we're equally as strong, and you're underestimating how powerful a GF Crow is." She rested her hand on Laguna's shoulder. "I won't let you down, Laguna. I promise. We won't fail. There's way too much riding on this. That Dark Sorceress has to be stopped."  
  
"Don't go rushing in like you always do, sis. Use a little caution for once. I mean, think of Irvine. He's really depending on you. . .to come home."  
  
Jace smiled softly. "We'll go home together, Laguna. The three of us. And I'll visit your Winhill, when it's all over too, meet that wife you keep telling me so much about."  
  
"Raine," Laguna reflected, missing her more every moment.  
  
"I'll bet, she's really beautiful. And strong too. She'd have to be, to put up with you all the time."  
  
Laguna nodded. "She's the best, Jace. Just like you."  
  
"Laguna, we have to go," Kiros reminded him.  
  
"Right. Be safe."  
  
Jace gave a steady nod. "Be strong," she returned, their usual way of parting, before Laguna ran off with his comrades.  
  
Maura sighed, brushing fingers through messy blond hair that fell into bright eyes. "This is gonna be a hard one, isn't it Jace?"  
  
"Do you wanna back out?" she asked. "You must be pretty concerned about your son. I'll understand, and you can go, no questions asked, but you have to tell me now. Same goes for you, Xan," Jace said, a kind-hearted sort of weariness on her voice. "It'll be harder to do on my own, but I will if I have to."  
  
The man scoffed slightly. He was tall with deep green eyes and seemed to have a somewhat arrogant air about him. "Don't be stupid," he said. "We knew what we were signing on for from the very beginning. If we weren't willing to go through with it, we wouldn't be here."  
  
"Xan's right!" Maura said. "Of course I'm worried, but I'm not a chicken and I'm not running away!" Maura stomped her foot, punching metal-knuckled gloves together. "Besides, if I did go, and if you lost, it wouldn't matter. We'd all end up dying anyway, so it would be totally counter- productive. Anyway, if I die, or something, and if Samuel doesn't make it, there'll still be Lacey, to watch out for him, so I'm not really worried. She's a little frivolous, but. . .she can be responsible, if she tries hard enough."  
  
Xan rolled his eyes at the woman. 'Guess she's braver than I thought,' he noted mentally. "I think that rant meant, basically, that we signed onto this for the same reasons that you did. It has to be done, and we're willing to sacrifice everything to see that she's stopped. . .same as you, Kinneas."  
  
"Right. Well, since that's all clear, let's get going. It's a pretty long way, from here, but we'll make it. We've got to. There are a lot of people depending on us, so there's no way we're gonna fail. I refuse to fail." . . .  
  
`````  
  
Irvine blinked awake with a tragic little smile on his face. Squall just sat, staring at him for a long moment. From Laguna's end, he knew most of what happened next. He went to go rescue Ellone, and then things got a little crazy. He'd seen it all before. But where Irvine had just been, after they'd parted, that was something he couldn't share. It was something that he had to do alone, same as Squall had during the war. But Squall swore, he would be there for him, no matter what.  
  
"We're really lucky, Squall," Irvine said softly. "To have parents that we can be so proud of."  
  
Squall gave a curt nod before Laguna stormed into the tavern. "L-l-look what I caught!" he gasped ecstatically. It was rather obvious that he ran all the way from the lake.  
  
Kennedy looked up from where he was pouring a soda for Zell. "Cripes! It's. . .a fish! And a big one too!" he gaped. "You got that out of Jace's lake?"  
  
"Yeah, wild huh? It's like it's coming back to life, or something. So, cook it cook it!!!" Laguna beamed. "Fish for lunch!"  
  
"Yay! Sir Laguna, you are SOOO awesome!" Selphie beamed, hopping up and down happily in her chair.  
  
Laguna brought a hand up and scratched the back of his head, blushing slightly. "Aw, it's just a fish, Selphie."  
  
"My Seffie really digs the seafood," Irvine chuckled, squeezing her against his side in a tender, one-armed hug.  
  
Jace looked at Raine, her jaw a little slack and an odd expression in her eyes. Her image was fading in and out slightly. That expression. . .was it. . .  
  
'Jace?' Raine asked.  
  
Jace gave a weak smirk. 'Ra. . .ine. M-my arm. . .it hurts. . .so much. . .all of a sudden. I feel kinda. . .nauseous. I think I'm gonna. . .pass. . .out. . .'  
  
And her form fell forward, fading with the grayish spirit of Raine, as the other woman called out her name and leaped forward to catch her.  
  
Squall looked up, eyes wide, and blinked. "M-mother?!?"  
  
```````  
  
HOKAY! Sooo. . . .cliffy! Hate me now? Haha. Well, tha'z about it for this chapter, and not too many more chapters to go, I don't think. Things are starting to get interesting, tehe! Like it? Hate it? R&R.  
  
More to come.  
  
Until next time, Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


	21. Chapter TwentyOne

Alrighty, this chapter may look a bit different because I'm messing with the formatting a bit and trying different things.  Anyways, thanks again for the reviews.  The main part of the story will probably be done with in another 4 chapters or so. . .depending on how long I decide to make the chapters.  By "main part" I mean the part of the story that takes place in Bella Maure.  There'll be a few chapters after that. . .*chews lower lip* I have no idea how many, actually, as many as it takes to do what I want to do, I suppose.  I don't think I'll finish this story in 25 chapters, as I'd anticipated before. . .maybe thirty.  The reasoning, I was going to have the Bella Maure section and then an epilogue, but as I write I find that that would have to be a rather long epilogue and it would probably make more sense to just add it as additional chapters, so, at this point in time, I think that's what I'm going to do.

Well, hey!  My reviewers should be happy though!  You all keep telling me I need to make the story longer, right?  Haha.  In all honesty though, I keep giving you estimations like I really know.  All my stories end up being longer than I'd intended.  Writing a one-shot is like a chore and a half for me. Hehe!  It's sad, really.  Well, whatever the case, I stand firm in my belief that this story won't go on forever and ever, but. . .uh. . .Saying I can finish it in twenty-five chapters is pretty doubtful at this point in the game, so we'll just have to see. (I believe I've answered your question, Aison. . .in a very round-about sort of way.) 

Also, I AM sorry for any confusion with shifting from one time and place to another, but I am hesitant to make a distinct separation between the two timelines since the general effect I was trying to go for was a sort of "fading" from one place to another, leaving for a moment a sort of "where am I?" feeling on the part of the characters, more than a snap of the fingers and boom okay here I am, different time, got it.  I don't know if I've managed to achieve that, but I think more distinct separations would sort of counteract what I was going for, so I won't be using them.  So I apologize for any confusion that might cause, but at this point in the game, it can't really be helped. *shruggs*  Ah well, no worries, I guess.

I know my chapters recently have been very short, but I figure, I can write short chapters and update pretty often, or I can write long chapters and make everyone wait.  (Okay, so in reality, I haven't ACTUALLY put that much forethought into it all, but it sounds better than saying, "I know I've been writing short chapters lately. . .uh, I'm not sure why that is.")  Anyways, maybe this chapter will be longer.  Let's find out. . .

*****

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer" 

**by: Banshee Puppet**

**Chapter Twenty-One**

*****

"CROW!  DAMNIT, DO SOMETHING!  JACE, COME ON!  DON'T YOU DARE DISAPPEAR ON ME!  You have too many promises to keep!" Raine pleaded, surrounded by their black world.  "Please," she said softly.  "Open your eyes.  Your story isn't finished yet, you know."

She didn't know why she'd become so panicked over this.  It didn't really affect her much, either way.  As Jace reminded her, she WAS dead, after all, had already passed to the world beyond this one.  It was a loophole that she'd managed to come back.  But she had grown fond of the woman, as reckless as she was, as stubborn and as goofy as she could be, as annoying as Raine found her endless laughter, the way there was almost nothing that she seemed to take seriously.  And, after all, she had a promise to keep as well.  'I'll protect you, as long as you protect them,' she had said, and at that time, she had meant it as well…and she meant it now.

"You two are nothing but trouble," a voice sighed, and a shadowy grayish light pulled together to form a tall man.

Raine blinked up at him.  He had his arms held across his chest.  He wore a Galbadian Military dress uniform, but the style was old, a stiff hat and beige coloring, short-sleeved and  decorated with awards of valor, and honor, and other such.  He had a kind look to him, but there was also a sort of jovial sense of humor hidden within his smirking eyes.

"Wh-who're you?" Raine asked.  "Don't take Jace away, not yet!  Please?"

The man snickered.  "I have no intention of doing anything of that nature," he informed her, point blank.  "My name is Ethram Loire, or it was at one point.  For the past while now, though, I've been a part of Crow. . .the reasonable part, if I might say so myself.  When she died, we thought we were all ready to rest, but then she goes and gets herself stuck in limbo."  Ethram rolled his eyes.  "What a stubborn girl."  He paused, letting those words sink in.  "Anyway, the other half of Crow already came back to her to help her out, but we won't be able to stay forever, you know, since we passed to the other plane much more easily than she did.  But we'll do what we can, for the time being.  You'd better keep your promise to protect her, Raine.  I made a similar promise to someone else, a long time ago.  If I knew what would happen for it, I might have thought a little better, but. . .I can't say I mind it all too much.  After all, I got to see my son again, if only through her eyes, and that was kind of nice."

"I don't understand.  You're part of Crow?  I don't understand at all," Raine blinked.

"Well, I suppose you wouldn't.  But you'll figure it out on your own soon enough, and I'm hesitant to say more and knock fate off kilter again.  So, for now you'll just have to deal with my little secrets."

Ethram kneeled down on the other side of  Jace's fleeting form and sighed slightly, adjusting his hat.  "Alright Irvine, you troublesome bastard, I'm coming already, so stop making so much noise," he said, and, kissing Jace on the forehead, the location known as the third eye, he faded  into her form through that single point, and the black feathers became solid wings which wrapped around her, knocking Raine back in surprise, then spread wide, a pair of massive black wings, and then faded into the form and Jace dropped to the ground, after a moment, blinking up blearily, solid once again…or at least, as solid as ghosts tend to get.  She had lost that flicker and seemed to be conscious, whatever the case.

Raine rushed to her side and looked down at her.  "Jace?"  And gasped when she looked into Jace's eyes.  She had a certain look to her now…like she wasn't alone in there, and Raine knew it was because Crow had returned to her.

Jace yawned, sitting up slowly.  "Morning Sunshine," she said with that negligent smile she had.  "Looking colorful today.  Or at least, a tad bit less gray."

"Huh?" Raine looked down at her hands.  Just the barest hint of color, an almost pinkish hue to the skin.  And she gasped.

"It was bad business, Raine, getting involved with someone like me.  No turning back now," Jace informed her quite frankly.  "Any regrets?"

Raine thought about it a moment, letting it all sink in, the fact that she was going to be stuck here in limbo too, at this rate.  "None," she decided after a moment.  "I made a promise, after all."

"Hn.  That's just the way you should be.  I wouldn't expect any less, from my brother's wife."

*****

"You're brooding again," Irvine noted noncommittally.

"You're as observant as ever," Squall dead-panned.

"I know you probably don't feel like sharing, but…do it anyway," Irvine gave Squall a wry smirk, leaning his elbows on the table and resting his chin in his palms.  "I can be as patient as I want to be…so spit it out already."

"I saw my mother before…Raine.  She looked…really scared." Squall sighed.  He'd given up arguing with the pony-tailed gunman. But before he could say more, she was there again, supporting Jace, who was barely able to stand, bloodied and beaten, tragic and woven out of time, head hung slightly and eyes shadowed by the brim of a black cowboy hat.

"M-mom," Squall whispered, awestruck.  

Irvine blinked, rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand.  He couldn't see them, but…he could ALMOST see them.  It was like a shifting of shadow, a section of nothingness that the light couldn't quite peek through, a vague and shadowy outline that flickered as the lights in the room shifted.

"S-Squall.  S-sorry," Jace said in a hoarse whisper.  "Just…there's a little more to say.  It's…it's okay, right?" 

Squall looked at Irvine and nodded.  "Go ahead and show us the rest, Jace.  Do whatever you've got to do," he said, giving Irvine a look that told the cowboy to brace himself, and, blearily, with a little stopping and stuttering, like riding bumper cars and getting continually hit from behind until your head is almost spinning, almost dizzy, but not quite there yet, the boys faded, once again, into the past…

Laguna, Kiros, and Ward.  They were running more quickly than Squall realized they were capable of.  Squall couldn't figure out where they were, didn't have time to take in the scenery.  All he could manage to grab onto was Laguna's rather rampant emotional state.  He was panicking.  'Jace, hold on.  I'm coming!'  It was the only thought that Squall could grab onto that seemed even remotely lucid.  Laguna's hands were wrapped tightly around his machine gun and his calves were burning, his chest, so raw that it felt like it might explode.  He was chasing down a storm on pure adrenaline, when he stopped, Squall knew, his body wouldn't have anything left to give, and that's when he saw her…

Desperation and resolve, that's what he felt in his mother's heart when he found himself there again.  Off to her right, she heard something like a grunt, then a groan, then silence.  She didn't dare look, she already knew what had happened.  "Maura!  Help Xan!" she hollered.  "I'm calling Crow."

Maura gulped.  "We're all gonna die, aren't we?" she sniffled slightly but did as she was told.  Jace did her best to cover the blonde woman while she rushed across behind her, fishing out the last phoenix down in their once plentiful stock.  "It's the last one!" Maura called.  "So try not to do anything stupid and reckless and well, anything that YOU wouldn't normally think twice about doing.

Jace knew, they had _finally_ started to tap into Adel's seemingly endless resolve, started to wear into her like a wave into a stone, but it wasn't good enough; she knew as well as anyone that they would be the first to break.  They hardly had anything left in them.  And once GF between the three of them wasn't nearly enough.  She only hoped Laguna and his friends were faring better than they were, and that Plan B was ready, just in case they failed.  But she didn't want to think about that, refused to think about that.  'No!  I'm going home!  I promised Irvine I would come back, so we can't fail.  I refuse to let this bitch win.  I'm Jace Kinneas, after all, I've lived through so much…I won't be defeated here, not like this.

She heard another groan and a weak "thanks", before the light faded from her eyes and the black-winged beast rose up.  'Hit her with everything you've got, Crow.  Don't give up until the very end.'  Those were her instructions.  That is what she had told the GF who had been with her since a trip through the desert that she almost didn't survive.  And the GF, wordlessly told her that that is _exactly _ what he expected she would say.  Mission accepted.  The colossal black-winged beast cast haste on itself, knowing that Adel's magic was surely to strong to allow her to fall under a spell as weak as "slow", and then started it's onslaught.  Wave after wave of its special technique, known only as the "testament flare".  It was a strange combination of "drain", "ultima", and "firaga", and as powerful as it was, it still wasn't enough.  It managed to weaken Adel considerably, but…it wasn't enough.

"Damn!  Why won't you just die!" Maura cursed out, under her breath.

"That's it.  The rest is up to us," Xan said, using his gunblade to hold up his weight.  He had maybe three attacks left in him, tops.  If he was lucky, two of them would be overdrives.  And Maura, she had a little more energy in her, wasn't as badly wounded, but they both knew that she couldn't take a hit from a spell as well as he could, so Jace tossed her a shell, in hopes that things would work out for the best.

Xan cast his last "flare gun" before a "demi" took him out, and brought Maura down to almost nothing.  But she wasn't giving up.  While Jace slammed into Adel with her "special ammo" (Nobody knew what it _actually_ was, only that it seemed to have "random elemental attributes" and hit with the effect of low to mid-level elemental spells.), Maura used what was left of her energy to prep for her special as well, a little trick she called the "cold iron fist", which combined her fighting skills, and blizzara, the only spell she could manage to cast effectively, with a pure surge of adrenaline.  And she also, was out.  That left Jace alone, and running tragically low on ammo and energy.  She dove behind a pile of crates to just barely miss a thundaga spell.  'Hate those damn things!' she grimaced, wincing when she tried to move her arm.  She fired off another round and reached to reload.  'Damnit!  Nothing left?  Already?!?  Shit!' she thought.  And Laguna hadn't made it.  It was up to her now.  'But I won't give up, not until the very end.'

The small metal case at her back itched her skin.  She knew what was there.  A suicide bullet, only one, because you only ever needed one.  'But will it be enough?'  she wondered.  And with a hard swallow, she realized, 'it's got to be.'

She flipped open the case and dodged another spell as she loaded the last shot she had.  'One clean shot,' she thought, an eerie calm coming over her, with knowing that this would be the end of it, the end of everything, as far as she was concerned.  'I won't be able to see Irvy again.  I hope, one day, he'll be able to forgive me.  But I have to finish this.  If I don't take her out now, then…this is my parting gift to you, Irvine, my little boy.  I'm going to give my life, to give you a peaceful world to grow up in.  That's my hope for you, my dream, a world without wars.  I knew I'd never see it, but if I can do this, then maybe, just maybe, you will.  I want a peaceful world, a world without Adel, for my little boy.  For him, I'll sacrifice everything.  And pulling back the safety, taking one last, deep breath, she aimed…and she fired.

"NOOO!!!!  JACE!!!!!!"  Laguna's voice called out to her, and it was the last thing she heard, her eyes going wide as she looked at him, in stunned and silent shock, as the bullet connected with Adel's chest and violently, with searing flames of pain that tore at her very skin, creating huge gashes and burn marks along the surfaces of her body, as her life energy was drained out of her, and forced, momentum and sorrow, into a single bullet, and she fell forward, and into oblivion, or, more accurately, limbo, and Bella Maure.

Squall could feel the hot tears falling down Laguna's cheeks.  He knew, in his place, he would be crying too, and he knew his soul was, even from inside of Laguna.  He'd just shattered, in that moment, knowing that he was only a moment to late to stop her from making this sort of sacrifice.  Her body was limp and blood-covered, and then, with the next words, Laguna, for a moment, wanted to die too.  It was Kiros who spoke them, a quivering voice and hardly a whisper.  "Laguna.  It's Adel.  She's…not dead.  Out cold but, who knows for how long.  If that didn't kill her…"  Kiros paused, taking a deep breath.  "Laguna, what do you want to do?"

"I want to die," Laguna said, chocking on strangled sobs, but foregoing that, we really only have one choice, don't we?  Get the Estharians here.  We'll seal her.  It's the only thing we CAN do…and it's still…not nearly enough."

Irvine and Squall awoke to the sound of a shattered scream, and for a moment, just an instant, they thought they were in the dream world, before they realized, the thing they were witnessing, was real…tragically and painfully real…

*****

Okay, so, not very long, granted.  I could have combined this and the next chapter and not tortured you with this cliffy…but, well.  The format of the story changes at this point, since "Jace's story" is finished now, which means the vast majority of what's to come will now be occurring almost entirely in the present.

A/N:  for anyone who I confused with the beginning of this chapter, with the Raine/Jace scene, let me explain.  The first twenty chapters had two realities, "the past" and "the present", that scene was an introduction of a third reality, "the spirit realm" for lack of a better term.  It's where ghosts and the dead are.  Just envision endless, pitch black, with occasionally a light or shadow forming into something tangible (like Ethram), and you've pretty much got it.  Uh, guess that's it for now.

Next chapter coming soon, I hope.  The next chapter will probably be the last "Bella Maure" chapter, but I'm really just guessing. R&R.  So, 'till next time, happy haunting.

~Banshee Puppet~


	22. Chapter TwentyTwo

Alrighty, boys n' girls!  After that really really mean cliffy in the last chapter…here I am with chapter twenty-two of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer".  After this chapter, there will be a sort of "intro to part two/interlude" sort of thing.  It will probably be QUITE short, and then the story will continue.

Uh, thanks to my reviewers again,  and on with the story.

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"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Two

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It was like a bad dream.  That was all Irvine could really think.  The shattered scream echoed through his ears like a sudden crack of thunder, only it didn't end as quickly as that.

And Squall, all Squall could think, for an instant, was, am I the only one seeing this?  But that thought was quickly shoved aside as his father moved.

"Jace!" Laguna gasped, quickly lifting the bloody body into his arms.  Yes, he had seen her like this before.  Once, a long time ago.

It had been a shock, to find her, suddenly flickering into reality on the tavern floor, covered in blood and all but completely unable to move, looking like she had that day when Laguna found her after she shot off her suicide bullet.  The main difference now?  She was alive.  It didn't make any sense, but Laguna didn't care about that at the moment.  It was enough, he decided, to just hold her in his arms, to try to save her, to do whatever was possible.

"K-Kennedy!  Get some water, a first aid-kit, SOMETHING!  We have to help her!" he pleaded helplessly, the blood already sticking to the khaki button down he wore.

Jace shook her head slightly.  " 'Guni," she whispered.  "Hey big brother, how's it goin'?" The words came out through teeth clenched in pain.

"H-hey," Laguna stuttered.  "I…um…I mean…"  What did you say to a woman who died over fifteen years ago?  A woman who was now, alive, and lying helplessly in your arms, dying all over again.  What did you say to the kid sister you'd thought you lost, the person who'd been given back to you, only to die all over again.  And it was obvious that she was dying.  The erratic pulse, the ragged breathing…all that blood.  Dying?  Yes.  All the signs were there.

Irvine's lower lip quivered.  "M-mother?  M-mom?" he whispered, frozen, tears starting to well up in his eyes.  

Tentatively, Squall's gloved hand touched Irvine's arm, concern etched in once a once stony gaze, and that was all it took, that whisper of a touch, for Irvine's initial shock to wear off.

"MOMMA!" he yelled slightly, running to her and taking a knee opposite Laguna.  "Mom?" his question was pleading, desperate.

She reached one bloody hand up to brush the hair from his face, slowly, as if it took great effort to do so.

"Hey kiddo," she said softly, with a smile that was half grimace.  "Look at you.  All grown up.  My lil' Irvy.  I've missed you a lot."

Squall moved to behind Irvine's shoulder, feeling the urge to rest his hand there and comfort the other young man, but thinking better of it.  Jace's eyes didn't miss him though.  As a ghost, his eyes had almost called to her.  He had the eyes of someone who'd come too close to death and never come all the way back, and also, his were the only eyes she'd really been able to see, the only eyes that could really see her.  And suddenly, she came to a realization.  "You…you're the little boy…with the toy car."

Squall gave a curt nod, and gave into the temptation to rest his hand on Irvine's shoulder.  'He needs to know, that I'm still here for him,' he told himself, mentally grunting at that logic.  'Rinoa is turning me into a girl.'  "My name is Squall," he said in his usual monotone.

"Squall…" Jace said, her voice coming off as a hoarse whisper.  She was so confused, not entirely sure what was going on.  One minute, she was a ghost, looking down, and now, she was very much flesh and blood, in so much pain, and, she was certain, dying all over again.  And still, all she could think is, 'I want to protect them, so badly, so much--'.  

"Please, protect my boys for me," she said softly, before her eyes began to roll back in her head, and consciousness slipped from her grasp.

"JACE!"  "MOM!"  the desperation echoed through her mind as she fell, once again, into blackness…

Raine gasped.  She'd been left behind, color in her cheeks, but, abandoned in the between plane…lost in limbo, forced to watch Jace's trouble, but not to help.  She tried to reach out, but her hand reached through Laguna's shoulder.

"No, this canpt be happening!" she cried out.  "No!  Damnit!  I swore I would protect her!  Jace! …" but no one seemed to be able to hear her, or they were just too preoccupied at the moment.  "Damnit!  Crow!  Do something!  Anything!  I promised, I would protect her!"

_"Is that really, what you desire?" _It was a voice coming from nowhere, and for a moment, Raine wasn't sure it was speaking to her, until it spoke again.  _"Do you desire, to protect that woman, lost in limbo and destined to die again, for all eternity?  Raine Leonheart, would you give your very soul, for that wish, your very memory?"_

Raine gasped.  "I…I would," she said, sounding meaker than she meant to be.

"Then, it shall be done.  You shall protect her, and she shall protect them.  You and she will stand, side by side, until the end of eternity, and perhaps, longer even than that."

And suddenly, Raine felt very fuzzy, before she fell into blackness, conscious thought fading away with every instant.  And she found herself, finally, in a dream, like waking, where she and Jace were holding hands…

"Jace?"  Raine asked nervously.  She was terribly confused.  This place was black, but the blackness was different from the blackness she was familiar with.  This blackness was…a little too gray.  And Jace wasn't at all bloody and broken here, and her expression was so serene as well.  It was as if she had been healed, body and soul.  "Is this…is this limbo?" Raine asked, feeling like a stupid child when Jace turned her face toward her and smiled sweetly.

"No, Raine.  This is the place between limbo and life."

"The place between…"

"You've done it, you know.  I wouldn't have dreamed such a thing was possible, without your help."

"What do you mean?  Jace, you're making no sense!"  Raine pleaded for a straight answer.

"We're going back," Jace whispered.  "You and I, Raine.  We're going back together.  Crow has explained it all to me.  It's perfect.  Oh!  But you probably want to see it, don't you?  Crow's true form?  I would have never imagined it…or dared to…dared to dream that it was…"

"Jacine Kinneas, tripping over words, well, that'd be the day," a male voice said, and Raine's head snapped toward it.  A large, thickset man in a white tank top and khaki military trousers.  Beside him, was the man she had met earlier, the one that called himself Ethram Loire.  And the large man was smiling so fondly at Jace…

"Raine, I would like you to meet two very important men," Jace said calmly.  'How can she be so calm when my mind is racing like this!' Raine's thoughts demanded.  "My father, Irvine Donovan, and his partner from the wars, as well as Laguna's father, Ethram Loire.  Also known as GF Crow."

Raine blinked.  Then, she blinked again.  "Are you saying what I think you're saying?"  she asked, taking a deep breath.

"Yes," Jace said easily.  "You and I…are going to become a GF so that we can protect the boys.  Are you having second thoughts?"

"…no?" Raine asked.  It was all a little much to register, a little much to swallow.  She was going to become a GF?  Her and Jace?  "B-but what kind of GF are we going to become?" she asked, hoping Jace knew the answer.  

"That," Jace said steadily, pausing before speaking again, "is entirely in our hands.  I don't really know, but whatever we become, I'm sure it will be beautiful, Raine…beautiful, and strong."

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Gyah!  Another cliffy and another chapter that's too short!  I'm sorry I'm sorry!  But at least I update often, right?  Well, right?  

I know this chapter was a bit confusing, but all the time/space shifting is becoming challenging lately.  Thankfully, I'm almost done with it for the most part.  If I've confused you with this chapter, I hope to un-confuse you with the next chapter.

And on another note?  I would like to take a vote.  Aison, who really hates Irvine's dad, Max Kinneas, wants to see Laguna beat him up in this story?  What does everyone else think?  Do you hate him?  Do you want to see him get socked?  If so, by who?  Laguna?  Irvine?  Squall?  R&R and let me know.  I MIGHT just make it happen.


	23. Chapter TwentyThree

It took me forever to get this chapter up.  I know and I'm sorry, but I was EXTREMELY sick for two weeks and could hardly get my ass out of bed to get more juice!  I even called out of work one day! (And I NEVER do that.)  So cut me some slack man.  Anyway, lookie me, I'm writing now, and hoping for a longer chapter this time. *crosses fingers and wonders how much she can do in thirty minutes*  Well!  Let's find out!

Lunatic Pandora1:  Something out of Alien?  Really? *blinks*  Well, now I'm gonna have to finally see that movie so I can make the connection.  (No, I have not seen Alien yet.  Hey cut me a break, I haven't seen Terminator or Rocky either, and I just saw the first Matrix two weeks ago :-p.  What can I say?  I'm a dork, if it isn't animated, I probably haven't seen it! *blushes*  Well, whatever.

Aison:  you dork!  I already KNEW your opinion on the matter.  We joked about it for like twenty minutes!  Haha!  I may be old, but I'm not senile…well, much.  Hehe.

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

By: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Three

"MOM!  MOTHER!  WAKE UP!" Irvine shook the young woman helplessly, knowing only, her breathing was shallow, but she was still alive.  There was still a chance that…

Laguna sat shaking, wrapping his arms around himself as if to fight off a bitter chill.  'This is…This…too much,' he thought.  "I…I can't do this," he mumbled, his words shaky as tears started falling from his wide green eyes.  Greif.  Squall knew that look.  His father was…and Irvine…and what about Jace?  This couldn't be what she had in mind.  It was breaking them.  "It's too much!" Laguna sobbed.  "Jace. I…don't make me watch you die again, please don't make me watch you….oh for Hyne's sake!  I think I'm gonna puke."

"Damnit," Squall muttered.  "Jace.  What were you trying to do anyway?  Was it worth all of this?"

"S-Squall?" Rinoa asked, tears brimming in her eyes with deep confusion, as if she wasn't sure if she was allowed to cry for someone she didn't know, over something she didn't understand.

Squall bit his lower lip, trying to find an answer for her.  "Rin…I…just leave us be for now.  Please.  This is…a family thing."

Rinoa nodded, but a slight sniffle let him know that he'd just unintentionally hurt her feelings…again.  'I'll apologize later,' he thought, turning his attention to his shivering father when a voice hit his ear.  "Squall…Squall…" It was almost an echo at first, before the vague silouette of a tiny brunette came into his view. 

"Mother," he whispered. 

Irvine and Laguna looked up, their eyes trailing to where Squall's gaze had locked.  Again, Irvine could see something, like an odd disruption in the light of the room, but nothing solid.  And through tear-brimmed, blurry eyes, Laguna blinked.  "R-Raine???"

"Tell them…to please not worry.  Jace and I…we've already made up our minds. So please don't cry for us.  It's what we want.  She'd explain herself but…well, she's over there right now…so…anyway, you should see her.  I'd forgotten that content, peaceful look she could have when she isn't, you know, trying to change the world."   Raine giggled slightly.  "Anyway.  We'll see you soon, okay?  And tell your father…that we're sorry for leaving, but…we'll see you all again soon."  Her voice faded as she walked over to Jace's solid body, a pained expression, but also, a wistful smile was on her face.  "I'm coming now…Jace," Raine whispered as she leaned over the body of her sister-in-law and kissed her gently on the forehead.  Raine's spirit faded into the still barely-alive body of Jace Kinneas, like it was being gently sucked in by a swirling cerulean vortex that opened there for anyone with any amount of spiritual awareness to see.  A peaceful expression overtook the unconscious woman's face, making her look merely asleep despite all the wounds on her ravaged body.  And Then, Irvine was forced to leap out of the way as that body began to heat up unnaturally, burning his hands through the gloves he wore as colors shifted, the blue vortex swallowing up the regenerated body of a woman who had been dead for fifteen years, and shooting up through the roof of the tavern, a ball of light, that, from a distance, most resembled a shooting star.  

Irvine gasped, acting on instinct as he grabbed a startled Laguna by the wrist and yanked him away from the debris falling from the ceiling, where that bizarre ball of light impacted, and their silence was broken by a strangled "eep!" coming from upstairs as a tattooed blonde head looked down, wide-eyed, through a hole in the floor of Jace's old room, right where the television used to be. 

"What in Hyne's name WAS that?!?" Zell asked with a gulp.  "It singed my hair!"  The martial artist flipped some slightly-charred bangs from his eyes.

"It was…uh…" Irvine scratched his head, trying to figure out how to explain all that Zell missed while he was upstairs messing with the radio, trying to contact Quistis for a pick-up.

"It was…love," Laguna answered after a few moments.

"Love, huh?" Kennedy asked as he looked through the hole in the floor and then up over his shoulder at the hole in his roof.  "Does love come with a billing address?  Because these repairs are gonna cost me."  Sure, he knew what Laguna meant, sort of.  He knew it had something to do with Jace, reckless cowboy that she was, but beyond that…

Laguna couldn't help a chuckle, as his face bristled into a small smile, then a grin, and a chuckle out of Irvine sent him laughing comfortably, smiling up at the sky behind Kennedy's head with that half-innocent twinkle that Squall had grown accustomed to seeing in his eye before all of this.  "I'll take care of it!" Laguna said, waving a hand as if brushing the subject off.  "You worry too much old man!" he teased.

And Squall couldn't help a small smirk.  It was, however, interrupted by a strange buzzing noise.  

"For cryin' out loud!  NOW it decides to work?!?" Zell whined as he looked over his shoulder, leaning slightly as another small chunk of the floor to the upper level fell through and sent him plummeting down into a table.  "OOHHOOOWWWW!!!" he whined, causing Selphie to chuckle off her silence and bounce happily at the sudden moment of normalcy.  "Aaawww!  Zelly!  Are you okay?" she asked.

"Do I LOOK okay to you?!?" he whined.  "My bangs are burnt.  My ass is numb.  I think I just sprained my wrist, and Kennedy is out of hotdogs!"  Zell sighed.  "Well, the radio works now, so you can call Quisty now, Squall."

Squall gave a curt nod in the blonde's direction before heading up the stairs…

"Quistis, it's Squall.  Where is Garden right now?"………

ugh.  Another short ass chapter. *shrugs*  I must be cursed.  Anyway, I'll be writing a short interlude next.  (Short as in, even shorter than one of my chapters.  I'm assuming one page max.)  Then I'll be starting part two of this story, which I think will take place mostly in Garden and Esthar…maybe.  Quistis and Seifer will probably show up too, finally, though they won't have major parts in this story. (Though I think Seifer will be important in the next one in this arc.  Not sure yet, but….probably, anyways!)  So, yeah, r&r.  Uhm.  I'm actually still making some very important decisions for part two, so if it takes me a little longer than usual to get that going, I'm sorry, but there are two or three things I have to decide right from the get go.  Anyways, my lunch break is over and it's time for me to go to job #2 for the day, so I have to stop ranting now.

Until Next Time, 

Happy Haunting,

~Banshee Puppet~


	24. Interlude

LunaticPandora1: Uh, yeah, I guess it did get kinda complicated there, huh?  But, I think the most complicated parts are over with now.  Though, don't quote me on that.  I didn't really want to do anything too complex, but as the story developed, I found I sorta needed to in order to move things along so…*scratches head*…oh well, I guess.

Uhm, Aison, knowing you, you probably reviewed too, but I don't recall what you said this time….uhm…..something about me being evil, I think…or was that the chapter before?  *chews lower lip*  Well, as long as you don't try to take my machine gun away again, we're cool.

This interlude, I think is a nice change from the last few chapters because it's pretty lighthearted and there isn't really any angst in it. (Shocking for me, I know.)  So, I hope you enjoy it while waiting for Part II of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer" to begin.  Some time has passed, but, I'm gonna shut up, since I tell you all of that in the interlude.  Blah.  So, yeah, still don't own it, and I know I sorta insert disclaimers at random, but so long as it's in here somewhere, right?  Well, right?  

Anyways, on with it!

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Interlude to Part Two

Squall brushed his bangs from his eyes with an exhaustive sigh as he slid open his door and stumbled into his room, paperwork toppling out of his arms and all over his floor as he tried to put his keycard back into his pocket.

"Almost die, save the word, survive the most moody girlfriend on the planet and a father who's just as bad, and yet, beauracracy still kicks my ass every time," he complains  as he leans against the door for a moment, letting his weary mind settle before flipping the light switch.  It was almost two a.m. and he was only just managing to escape the office.  Commander.  It wasn't an easy job, and if he'd thought he'd grown up quickly before, he'd found with these new tasks that he still had a lot to learn.  Bending over to pick up his paperwork, he noticed a slim, yellowish piece of paper mixed in with the mess.  His daily list of things to do, he couldn't keep himself even remotely organized without it, and even with it, he was hard-pressed to do so.  He placed it on the center of his desk, dumping his other papers unceremoniously in one of the drawers before groaning comfortably as he stretched out his back.  He slipped off his gloves, putting them in the pocket of his jacket and hung his jacket by the door, taking off his boots and leaving them, also beside the door.  There he was more comfortable now.  Only white cotton socks, a white muscle tee and his well-worn leather pants  to cling to his slender frame in the near eighty-degree weather of his quarters.  Sitting at the desk, he pulled out another yellow slip, writing on it. "1. Have heating and ventilation systems for instructor's wing checked and recalibrated."

His eyes scanned his room.  It had gotten more personalized, he realized, as the years went on.  At first, it had been barren.  One could barely tell that anyone lived here at all.  Then, there was a picture of himself and Rinoa, and another of him, looking disinterested and grumpy as ever at one of the happiest times of his life, at a party with his friends.  

It was a long time before any other personal effects were added to this space, but since Bella Maure, he'd added a few other pictures as well…pictures of family.  On his dresser, an old photo sat nestled in a slightly too large wooden frame.  A little boy with a young soldier and a woman in a cowboy hat.  Irvine, Jace, and…Laguna.  But this was not the only photo.  It had been some time since then.  Two years, to be exact, or nearly that.  And beside it, in a simple, yet elegant frame of slim copper, another photo rested.  A photo which he knew, had Rinoa's looping handwriting on the back of it, which read.  "Just the boys. First Annual Esthar Spring Carnival" and the date.  He couldn't help but smile at the memory of that day, and that ludicrous photo. He stood with a blue slushie in his hand, staring at it as if drinking it might cause him to grow another head.  Beside him, Laguna was happily consuming a strawberry ice cream, though he wasn't actually sure his father was getting any of it in his mouth as the sticky juices dripped down his hand.  And behind them, with an arm slung haphazardly over either of their shoulders, was Irvine Kinneas, grinning that manic grin he had, having the time of his life.  Just after the photo had been shot, catching the two shorter men off guard, Squall had said, "I swear Irvine, if you get any of that cotton candy in my hair, I'm going to kick your ass."

"Sure sure Flower boy.  Don't worry about a thing!" the irritating cowboy had said flippantly.

Squall's response.  "Quack. Quack."  

And they laughed, with the unfortunate side effect of Squall moving his head slightly and getting sugary blue fluff stuck in his bangs.  But it was still a good memory.  One of the best he could recall.  He smiled nostalgically at the picture before turning back to this past day's memo on his desk.  'Two years,' he thought.  'Has it really been so long?'  

His eyes widened marginally as he noticed that one of the items wasn't checked off.   "Check Mail."  Email? He wondered why that was important when a small desktop calendar caught his attention and his eyes widened.  'It's the second Tuesday of the month!  He always emails me the second Tuesday of the month.  I can't believe I forgot!'  Squall almost laughed at himself.  It wasn't that he ever replied to Laguna's letters.  He didn't.  In fact, some of them were so inane and pointless that he almost wondered why the man bothered at all.  But all the same, he found, over the past two years, he had grown rather fond of those letters, no matter how vapid they were, and he really looked forward to receiving them.  So, he flipped open his laptop and signed onto the system in hopes that his father had not broken their little tradition.

He was not disappointed, cocking an eyebrow at the little blurb on his screen.  **Mail from: **gunaoverthemoon@squiggleworthy.com, **Subject: **_yayness!!!!!_

Squall cocked an eyebrow at this.  He'd always thought that was an extremely stupid email address, not that he knew what it meant, or if it was actually supposed to mean something at all, but that was besides the point right now. 'Yayness?' he thought.  'Is that even a word?'  How many times had he said that to Laguna now?  Is that even a word?  And the answer was always the same: _of course it is!  I just used it, didn't I?!?_ And the same mock-offence was always on the older man's voice.

With a yawn and no further delay, Squall opened the letter and began to read:

Hey Squall,

Guess what?  It's Tuesday!  I actually wrote this two days ago, but…I didn't want to break tradition, so I waited to send it!  Haha. _(Squall gets an image of his father laughing and scratching his head as he writes this.)_  So anyway, it's winter in Esthar and the holidays are just around the corner.

And, Squall, it's SNOWING!!!!  They say it hasn't snowed in Esthar in 37 years.  It's sooo pretty Squall.  Especially at night, all those little white snowflakes dancing around in the colorful lights outside my office window.  I wish I could be out in that right now, but I still have lots of work to do before I'm allowed out of my chair.  And it's already 2 a.m.!  This is the part about being President that I hate…paperwork and beauracracy!  I feel like I'm drowning in it.  Sigh. 

Well, I guess it's okay though, that I can't go outside now.  There isn't enough snow on the ground to make snowmen or have snowball fights with right now.  It just started this evening, really, but I wanted to tell you about it.(Not Tuesday evening, but the evening I wrote this, well, whatever.)  Ellone and I used to play in the snow all the time in Winhill.  We would make forts together, and all the Galbadian soldiers would help.  And before you say it, yes, I am well aware that I'm a bad influence!  But they were AWESOME forts! _(Squall chuckled silently and shook his head.)_  Raine would never come outside though (which I'm pouting about right now, in case you weren't sure).  She said it was just juvenile and immature, but we always managed to get her outside by the end of the evening.

Actually though, the main reason I'm emailing is because it's December, and the holidays are just around the corner.  I know last year, you couldn't make it because you were on a big mission (which is such a bummer!), but I was hoping this year you and Irvine and all your friends would be able to make it here for the week.  You know, Christmas to New Years.  Come a few days early!  Kiros and Ward went out and got a tree today.  It's the most unhealthy thing I've ever seen.  It's really big, but almost entirely bald down one side!  I don't know what they were thinking.  We were going to put it in the center of the room downstairs, but we ended up putting it in the corner to hide the skunk stripe.  And I had to cut off a good chunk of the top because it was crooked, and it was soooo funny watching them try to bring it in the front door!  I swear, we'll need a ladder to decorate the thing!  Which we'll be doing the morning of Christmas Eve, by the way.  I hope you can come and that you're here by then so you can decorate with us, or at least Irvine can, because I know you'll probably just stand in the corner frowning at us and pretending that you're not enjoying yourself even though we all know you are!  You're a terrible liar, you know.  

Uhm…where was I? Oh, right!  So the holidays are coming and I'd like to see everyone(especially since I did all my Christmas shopping three months ago and I don't think, at this point, anyone will take back returns).  So, I know you never reply to my emails, but try, just this once, and let me know if you can make it, okay?  I think I'll email Irvine now and tell him to make sure to force you to reply to my email.  Because unlike SOME people, he actually does! Jerk.  Will be waiting to hear from you.

Love from Esthar, 

Your dad,

L.L.

Squall smiled vaguely at the letter, mouse hovering over the "delete" button for a few moments before a sudden impulse took it elsewhere and clicked.  **Reply.  From: **lionheart@garden.org **Subject:** Yayness?  Is that even a word?

And so, he began to type, hesitating as he began, not sure how he should start?  Who should he address it to?  "President Loire" was too formal since it wasn't a business letter, and "Father" definitely wasn't right.  Should he begin with the man's name, as he did, but as he typed "Laguna" he didn't feel so certain and deleted this.  Finally, he stopped thinking about specifics and tried just talking with the keys. Surprising himself with what came out.

Dad,

As always, it's good to hear from you, even if I'm fairly certain you're insane.  Yayness is sooo not a word, I don't care what you say, and so what if it's snowing.  Haven't you ever been to Trabia?  It's friggin' cold up there!

Anyway, I don't have a lot of time seeing as between drowning in paperwork, half of Garden under repairs, setting up missions, and the moodiest girlfriend on the planet, I barely have time for sleep.  Irvine says all girls are like that but…that just can't be possible, can it? (In the tradition of your manner of letting me know absolutely everything you're doing at the moment…groan.  There, happy?)  She's mad at me again, my room is a sauna, and I have to be up to start another fun day in three hours, so this letter isn't going to be anywhere near the length of yours.  

As far as the holidays go, I think I really need a vacation, even if that means dealing with your idiocy for a whole week, so, I'll find a way.  I'll close Garden for a week if I've got to.  I've got to get out of here.  Uh, well, that's it.

You're son, 

Squall.

(P.S. — Irvine told me that  Seifer is working for you now.  Please tell me he was kidding?)

(P.S.S — gunaoverthemoon@squiggleworthy.com? I've never heard of anything that stupid in my entire life.  But then again, it's you, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.)

Despite the fact that he was having some severe second thoughts about what he just wrote, Squall hit the send button and decided to be done with the entire affair, at least for the night.  So, shutting down his laptop, he stripped down to his boxers (another pair which Irvine must _never ever_ see, he decided as he noticed the "too cute" teddy bears that his girlfriend had picked out for him), and lay down atop the covers, hoping to find sleep before his alarm went off to beckon him onward to another hectic day at Balamb Garden.

So, yeah, that interlude was a little longer than I expected, but still short, so at least I'm not lying…much.  Next chapter will begin part two.  Uhm…I still don't know what I'm doing yet though, so it might be a few weeks before I have anything up on that.  Anyways.  R&R is, as always, loved and  coveted, and reviewers get hugs!

Until next time,  Happy Haunting, 

~Banshee Puppet~


	25. Chapter TwentyFour

LunaticPandora1: a little nuts?  Haha.   He's almost manic!  Lol.  It's okay, you can say it, that's why we all love him so much!  Hehe.

And as for you kit, more guna/irvy fics now?  Man, you're making me an awfully long list of fics to write!  Haha.  At this rate, I'll never be finished!  Ah well, at least I have a nice evil muse to give me ideas and well, you to yell at me when I start getting lazy! *grins*

I think you two are the only people still reading this story.  That's kinda a bummer, but I'm gonna make sure I finish it anyways, because I'm having a lot of fun writing it, as out-of-hand as it's gotten.  

So yeah, don't own FFVIII or any of it's characters, do own...a helluva lot of ramen. (I LOVE ramen! Lol!)  And on with the story.

*****

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer" 

**by: Banshee Puppet**

Part II 

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

*****  
  


"I give up!  I'm just going to close Garden for the week!" Squall huffed, scowling at Quistis.  "Unless YOU want to stay here and monitor everyone.  Just leave the lunch ladies here and let them all fend for themselves.  I don't CARE anymore!"

"Squall.  You're aware that you're throwing a temper tantrum, right?" Quistis inquired blandly.

"YES!" he snapped.  'Hyne, I'm turning into Rinoa.  Make it stop!' he thought.  Taking a deep breath he said, finally.  "Quistis.  I'm taking a vacation, Irvine is coming with me and anyone else who wants to, and I don't really care what you do to make it happen.  Put Xu and Nida in charge if you have to, I just don't give a damn."

Quistis thinks a moment and then says, "hey, actually, that's not a bad idea."

"…Really?"

Quistis nods.  Once in a while, Squall Leonheart, just occasionally, you say something smart.

"Fuck you."

Quistis sighs.  "Well, it's a quickly passing phenomenon."

*****

Laguna paced nervously, tying and untying the elastic in his hair, trying to get his ponytail just right, even though it looked perfect and identical each time he did it.  

"Uncle Laguna…" Ellone sighed.

"They're coming Elle.  They're really coming.  My boys are coming to spend the holidays with us like...like a real family," he smiled emotionally, like a new mother might, but Laguna was DEFINITELY not a mother.

"Yes, Uncle Laguna, they're coming, and they're sure to be here soon, so please stop playing with your hair and put a shirt on, would you?"

"Oh uhm…haha, right!  Sorry Elle, I'm just happy.  I still miss them so much, Raine and Jace, and since they both loved Christmas, this means a lot.  I just…I didn't think he'd actually come.  Irvine, sure, but Squall…Squall is really…"

"Here," Seifer announced as he stood in the doorway, packing a fresh box of cigarettes.

"Wha..!" Laguna gave the blonde a panicked expression as he fumbled with the buttons of his shirt.  

Seifer just smirked menacingly, saying no more as a slight figure, all but ignoring his presence entirely, passed under his arm and through the doorway. She wore black garments of the oriental style, her proud abs displayed with a carelessness that comes from lack of concern either way, a silver chain at her hips, around a thicker, more purposeful belt, which held the sheath of the katana on her right hip.  On her left hand, there was a large metal claw adorned with lessons in brutal force on its surface, the weapon of a beast.  And perhaps that is why the men of Esthar's security division had taken to calling her kuma-chan, little bear.

  
"Ragnarok just landed President Loire.  You asked me to inform you when your son and his friends arrived.  Shall I go attend to them now?" she asked, voice thick with business and apathy.

"Oh, thank you Jynx.  I'd actually like to do that myself, if it's okay."

Jynx gave a curt nod.  "I'll attend you," she said.

"Oh, you don't have to…" Laguna began to say when a fine set of the jaw informed him that she refused to take no for an answer.

"I know this is a family affair, sir.  All the same, it is my duty to protect you, at all costs, and it will not do to have you walking around without an escort.  You may have been a soldier once, Mr. President, but that was a very long time ago."

A sadness passed through Laguna's eyes for a moment.  Sure, she meant well, but he didn't like being reminded that he wasn't the fighter that he used to be.  And also, he knew she knew her job well, perhaps too well.  Resigned to his fate, he sighed.  "It's nearly Christmas Jynx, can't you get into the holiday spirit, just a little, or at least pretend to?" he asked.

"If by "get into the holiday spirit" you mean, "drop my guard" Mr. Loire, then the answer is no.  They're waiting.  We should go."

With a sigh, Laguna gave Ellone a slight pout and passed through the doorway, Jynx hot on his heels, saying, "Almsay, that means you too."

Seifer waved a hand flippantly, kicking off the doorframe.  "yeah yeah.  I'm coming, I'm coming."

*****

He saw Seifer first.  It was almost a surrender, to not attack, but it was Christmas-time, and secretly, Squall wanted the holiday to be perfect for his father.  It wasn't that he hated Seifer anymore, not really.  It's just that the two boys had grown so accustomed to fighting, they didn't really know how to treat one another any other way.  And as much as he wanted to blame the other boy for everything, he knew it wasn't his fault.  At that time, with the sorceress, Seifer had just been…lonely.  Squall could relate to that, as much as he'd never admit it aloud.

From behind him, a voice called, one he had just been talking with and had forgotten at the sight of the tall blonde smirking darkly at him.  "Hey, tulip!  Why so quiet all of a sudden?" the familiar drawl called out before the red-head's deep violet eyes locked onto a new target.  "Oh," he said.  "It's you."

"In the flesh," Seifer said easily, but Irvine's attentions were already elsewhere, snapping fingers in front of Squall's face which received the instinctive reaction of a slap upside the head from Squall, diverting his attention.  "Stop being annoying," the shorter man said.

"But I'm so good at it!" Irvine protested.

Squall scowled up at him wryly.  "Trust me, I know," he half-growled, but it wasn't the growl that he had always given Seifer, it was different, and the blonde noticed that, this growl, it was affectionate, maybe even…playful…brotherly.  And though he'd be hard pressed to admit it, Seifer was jealous, just a bit.

The others disembarked.  Rinoa and Selphie giggling together about how cute their boys were.  Zell grumbling and trying to control his temper when he saw Seifer.  Quistis tucking a small book into the pocket of a ¾ length leather jacket that she wore.  Always the mature one, the one to break awkward silences.  "Hello Seifer, you're looking well."

Seifer's smirk nearly turned into a smile…almost.  "And you're looking old, instructor Trepe," he said, as if chiding her.  "But it's good to see you."  He meant it too.  It really was good to see them all again, and it made him miss Garden all the more.

"It was a long flight," Quistis yawned before Irvine's voice caught everyone's attention.  "Uncle 'guni!" he all but cheered, thrilled to see the older man.  "…so good to see you!"  The words came out in a rush, an ecstatic child all but bouncing with glee.  Laguna had entered nervously at first, but at the cheerful welcome out of his nephew, and the giggles from the girls coming behind him as the cowboy bit his lower lip, hopping slightly, excited as a small child and unable to contain himself, but trying really hard to, Laguna's eyes lit up.  "Irvine!  You look great!" he greeted happily, walking as he spoke to stand in front of the rather tall young man.  "Give your old uncle a hug would you?  I haven't seen you in over a year you know!"  And the two men hugged in that way men hug, slapping one another on the back in order to prevent anyone from thinking that they were any less manly for hugging in the first place, both genuinely happy, but also with a sadness that only comes with memory tweaking the corners of their eyes.  Seifer had seen that somewhat wistful look in Laguna's eyes before, but in Irvine's as well…it was odd.  'What happened two years ago?' he wondered mentally as Laguna flitted from one member of the group to another, finally resting on Squall, who just stared blankly at him, like he had no clue what to do. They stared at one another for a long moment, Laguna shifting from foot to foot, playing nervously with the hem of his shirt, before, after over a minute, saying, almost reverently, his son's name.  "Squall."  A pregnant pause passed between them.  "I'm glad you were able to make it.  I…I've missed you.  It's…good to see you."  He wanted to hug the boy, but he didn't know if he should or not, if after missing so much of the boy's life, he could just start acting like a happy dad now, if he had any right to.

Squall seemed to be having some questions of his own, as his eyes searched his father's face, and found genuine happiness there, happiness that bordered on tears.  Giving the tiniest of smiles, Squall, after a moment, spoke.  "You should have the runway plowed.  All that snow made for a difficult landing for Selphie," he said at first.  And then, he added.  "You look well, Dad.  Thanks for inviting us."

And this was all the invitation Laguna Loire needed, to sweep the boy up into his arms, a huge bear hug, eliciting a strangled gasp, nothing more than a sharp intake of breath, from Squall before the boy wrapped his arms around the other's back and gave a gentle squeeze.  "Alright.  I get it.  You're happy to see me.  You can let go now," Squall chided, causing a blushing Laguna to step back, scratching his head.  "Ah…right…sorry.  I just…couldn't help myself."

Another pang of jealousy hit Seifer's chest.  Why was he forced to stand here like this, and watch the touching family moment—he obviously wasn't a part of it.  As if reading his mind, Jynx spoke.  "Mr. President.  If we're quite done here, you're hardly dressed for this weather, and Mr. Almsay and myself have a considerable amount of work to do."

"Ah, right!  Sorry Jynx.  Everyone, please, come inside," Laguna offered easily, heading for the doorway.  Only now did Squall notice that his father was wearing nothing but a pair of khaki slacks and a short sleeved shirt of crisp white linen.  No coat, no shoes, not even any socks.  He sighed in defeat, shaking his head at the other man's retreating form.

Smirking, Irvine leaned over and said, "that guy'll never learn, huh?"

And shaking his head slightly, Squall allowed a small chuckle to escape his lips as Rinoa wrapped herself around his left arm and the group headed inside, Seifer taking up the tail end of it, as he had been "taught" to do by Jynx.  Taught, that was a joke.  It was more like…flatly informed to do if he knew what was in the best interest of his health.  If she punished him, or whatever, for disobeying orders, he knew, it would be nothing personal.  And perhaps that is what bothered him the most.  It was never anything personal when Seifer was involved anymore.  Fact was, since the Sorceress War…nobody cared.  Ignoring him was the human equivalent of taking out the trash.  He just didn't matter at all.  He hated that, not mattering.  He wanted to matter somewhere, to someone.  'Maybe I haven't really grown up at all,' he thought, frowning deeply as he closed the door behind him.

"Minister Kiros.  Minister Ward.  I leave the President in your ever-capable hands," Jynx said with an even nod, almost a bow but not deep enough to be considered one.  "Mr. Almsay, if you would, we have rounds to complete."

"Yeah, sure.  I know. I know," he said, almost a complaint, but that he knew it wasn't that she had something against him.  She didn't have anything against anyone, really.  That's just the way she was.  It wasn't that she was trying to be rude.  It just…she didn't care…like she was incapable of it, or something.

"One of these days," he said as the door to the east wing shut behind them, "you're going to have to tell me what you're story is."

Jynx gave a bland shrug.  "And what story would that be?" she asked.

"The one that happened before you ended up in Esthar."

"I would presume, Mr. Almsay, that you would find much of yourself echoed in that tale," she  said flatly, her expression almost changing, as if someone pricked her with a pin rather suddenly and she was trying to figure out what happened for a split second before making the realization.  "There would really only be one major difference."  

She didn't seem as if she was planning to divulge anything further, so he pryed.  "Which would be?"  Now he was interested.  Before, she was just an object, shaped like a human, who had more authority then him, and bossed him around.  Now, she was almost a person, almost, even though, on her end, little if nothing had changed, her mannerisms the same, her features, identical.

"You were brainwashed," she answered silkily, apathetically, as if it didn't matter, but something in those haunted eyes hinted.  It mattered.  It really did matter quite a bit.  "Well then, I leave you to the eastern patrol.  You know how to contact me if you need me," she gestured at the small com links they both wore on the cuff of their left sleeves.  "I'll be patrolling the Northern Quarter," she said, allowing the door to click behind her.  

When it did, Seifer let out a disgruntled sigh.  "What the hell happened to you, to make you so…so…dead, Jynx?" he said irritably into the intercom, not really expecting a reply, so he started when he got one.

"Life, Mr. Almsay.  Life happened.  Life always happens, and you can't stop it.  Listen, let me give you some advice, from one of life's victims to another…if you want to go back to Garden, then ask him.  If you don't, you're always going to be miserable, right?  Forget the past.  The past doesn't matter.  The past doesn't even exist.  Just do what you want."

"You make no sense."

"Mr. Almsay.  You have two choices right now.  You can patrol, like I told you to, or you can chase after your dream.  But if you're still standing there when I reach the video center in five minutes, then please consider yourself fired."

A familiar click and hum signified that she'd broken the connection and had nothing else to say.  She was always abrupt like that.  Seifer bit his lower lip.  As much as she annoyed him, she always managed to make him think.  Maybe that's why he found her annoying to begin with.  But, fact was, he didn't know what to do.  And he only had five minutes to decide.

*****

hey, well, this chapter was a **little** longer!  Uh, okay, maybe not much, but…it's progress…sorta.  Didn't think Seifer was going to be this involved in the story, but…well, it's partially a set-up for the next one, and partially not and uhm…anyways.  Jynx, my ff8 cameo char is in this story too…didn't really expect that, but…I dunno, it just seemed natural to have her here, so, bleh.  There are so many original chars in this story that one more doesn't really change anything.  Whaddya think?  Like where it's going?  I really dun know what's gonna happen next—this story really took on a life of its own.  

Well, r&r if you have thoughts, or just because I asked politely…sorta.

Until Next Time,

Happy Haunting,

~Banshee Puppet~


	26. Chapter TwentyFive

LunaticPandora1: aw thanks. *blushes and scratches head*  But seriously, Laguna has had some ooc moments in this story, all the characters have, so the last chapter was fun because we finally see him "back to his old self" sort of.  And I enjoyed writing him the way that he is most naturally, because that's the part of him that I most adore.  But at the same time, I think Laguna amuses me so much, because even in the game, he can be so totally bipoloar!  Hehe.  He screws so much up and acts so silly, but when you get him down to business, as much as a goof as he is, he always manages to somehow have these moments of genius.  I adore that about him.  *sorry, went off ranting about her fav ff8 char again*

Well, anyways, I think I shall continue the story now.

*****

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Five

*****

The day before Christmas Eve, December 23rd, and where was Squall Leonheart?  Not relaxing at his father's home, enjoying his vacation, that's for sure.  No, Squall was in Esthar's business district, Christmas shopping with the ever-tardy Irvine Kinneas.  No, he hadn't gotten anyone anything yet either, (though their little group usually did a secret shopper, that still left Laguna and Ellone, besides Zell, who Squall knew was easy enough to please) but that didn't give Irvine an excuse to not remind him and drag him out sooner than this.  December 23rd.  Yeah, they did this every year, the two of them…even before Bella Maure, Squall found himself out, this late in the holiday season, with the frivolous, pony-tailed troublemaker, buying gifts.  He reminded himself that even if he didn't get Rinoa this year, he still wanted to give her a card, at least, since he wasn't allowed to give her anything else, according to Irvine, who had laid down the ground rules of the entire thing their first Christmas spent together.  That seemed like forever ago now.

Squall lifted a red dress shirt, crinkled his nose, and put it back down.  How was he supposed to know what Laguna would like?!?  Of course, he thought the shirt was horrid, far too bright, so Laguna would probably adore it, but he decided to go for something a little less…blinding and wandered a few racks down in the huge department store.  He'd lost sight of Irvine some time ago, but he wasn't worried, he knew the cowboy would reappear, bag-laden, in about an hour and ask if he was ready to go.  So, abandoned, he went about the task of picking out gifts alone.  It had been easy to select something for Ellone, an embroidered silk scarf had caught his eye that he knew she would like, Zell's gift, he'd gotten months ago, a simple gift, but one that would be well-appreciated, a year's subscription to "Black Belt Magazine", which Zell seemed to always have a copy of jammed into his back pocket, but Laguna was proving to be a more troublesome task.  What was too personal?  What wasn't personal enough?  This was his _father_ he was trying to buy a gift for after all, _his_ father.  And his father was a particular case.  Laguna Loire, the President of Esthar.  He could buy the man a nice silk tie, if Laguna wore ties.  Cufflinks if he wore suits.  Slacks? Jeans?  But he'd only ever seen the older men in khakis.  Just khakis and short sleeved linen shirts.  Whenever he wore one with long sleeves, those sleeves were cuffed above the elbow.  It made Squall cold, sometimes, just to look at him.  Didn't Laguna ever get cold?  Of course he did, he'd seen the man shiver before.  But not yesterday, when they'd arrived and he stood barefoot in the snow, little white gems kissing his hair, his nose crinkling when one fell on the tip of it.  But this morning, at breakfast, he'd sneezed.  'Idiot.  Gave himself a cold.  How stupid.'

As he thought, a saleswoman came up beside him.  "Can I help you with something sir?  Last minute shopping?" she asked happily.  She probably wouldn't be half as happy, he figured, but the season brought it out in people.

He nodded briefly at the question.  "I don't know what to get him," he frowned, not really sure why he was divulging the information.  But…he DID need help, and Rinoa had decided to abandon him to do his own shopping this year.  What had the girl picked out last year?  He couldn't even recall, it was that impersonal—impersonal enough that even the gift-giver had no idea what it had been.  Something trivial and stupid, he knew that much.  "I thought, maybe, um,  a jacket?"

He didn't care if Laguna hated the things.  He'd get himself sick if he didn't wear one. And, well, Laguna whined when he was sick…loudly. …and…often.

"What sort of jacket?" she asked.

"Well…I…um…?"

The sales girl chuckled.  "Alright, let's try this another way," she smiled.  "Are you close to him?  What's he like?"

"An idiot," Squall stated dryly, rolling his eyes before realizing what he'd said.  "…or…that is…" he sighed.  Hyne, he hated this.

"Ah, I see!  So then, you're very close!" she laughed.  "That's how I am with my sister.  She does some of the STUPIDEST things," she smiled.  "So, tell me about him and I'll see if I can help you."

Squall tried to think of a way to explain Laguna, but couldn't find words right away.  He looked at the girl with her cherubic little face, probably no more than fifteen, and found that she reminded him of a younger, less bubbly Selphie, but with almost a little bit of Quistis's tendency towards teasing him as well.  She was a cute kid.  Now, he vaguely noticed her nametag, "Ruvie" and relaxed a bit more.  He wasn't sure why, but chocked it up to being overly stressed and the too-contagious holiday spirit. "He never thinks ahead and ends up embarrassing himself a lot," he began. "He's a very kind person though, and everyone loves him even if he screws up constantly.  I found him out in the snow in nothing but a short-sleeved shirt and khakis yesterday.  And this morning he woke up with a cold.  He's absentminded and probably too casual for his own good, but also sort of…elegant."  The word surprised Squall.  _Elegant_.  Is that really what he thought?  Was his father _elegant_?  Not in the traditional sense but…he was, in his way.  He never realized he thought about the man that way before.  I've never seen him wear anything with sleeves, at least not rolled down, but…I don't want him to get sick, so I thought…"

"Leather," the girl said, interrupting his thoughts.  "He sounds to me like leather.  Deepest brown, single-breasted and ending just below the hips," she informed him.  "Light and soft, so it's easy to move around in, with a silk lining.  Let me show you?"

Squall gave a curt nod and followed her over to a rack, surpressing a smile at the girl's choice.  It was…perfect—just as she'd described it.  His father's name was practically etched into it.  He could imagine the man in it, this sort of office casual style leather jacket, with a pair of leather gloves and a soft blue scarf hanging in the collar, loose, because Laguna would be hard pressed to remember even bringing the scarf along, let alone wrapping it around his neck, packing snowballs with that haphazard grin and his green eyes shining, an absentminded laugh tumbling out of his stomach.  He looked at the jacket reverently.  It was impersonal, in it's way, but also, it was just right.  And the girl seemed to notice this.

"So, what size is he?" she asked.  

"Um…well…that is…I…." Squall thought, struggling to remember some article of clothing with a size in it, but couldn't seem to find one.  "He's about the same size as me,  but a  bit broader around the shoulders," he decided.  "More…" he was almost embarrassed to say the next part, but did anyway, since he didn't want the older man returning the article  that didn't fit and ending up buying something less practical.  "…more muscular, but not bulky.  Same height but…not as skinny as me."

The girl nodded knowingly, fishing the right one out of the rack, holding it up in front of Squall's chest and giving an approving nod.  "Anything else?" she asked.

"Maybe a…"

"I found it!" a voice cheered as an arm flopped over Squall shoulder, surprising the boy.  "The perfect gift for Uncle 'guni!  Whether he likes it or not!" Irvine laughed.  "You almost done shopping for daddy, tulip?" he asked casually.

Squall shrugged the arm off with a scowl and replied.  "Almost.  What did you get him?"

"Sweater and scarf!" Irvine all but crowed.  "I swear, as old as he is, you'd think we wouldn't still have to babysit him.  Squally, your dad sure is a piece of work, you know that, right?  And you're just like him, whether you'd like to admit it or not," the cowboy joked, tipping his hat at the girl when he noticed her standing there, watching the dialogue patiently.

Squall ignored him, turning to the sales girl and saying, "…a pair of gloves?"

She chuckled slightly and said, "alright boys, right this way!"

*****

Seifer leaned against the wall and ran cool fingers over his face, listening to the quiet ticking of the watch on his wrist.  As many times as he'd patrolled the east wing, that's how many times he found it nearly deserted.  A janitor here, a repairman there, but no one constant, no one who made it a habit of  being there, no one but him.  

So why did Jynx always insist that he patrol _this_ wing, so that she could patrol the north wing.  She was like a compass in that way, but, he had a feeling there was something more to it than that.  Part of him was curious, part of him wanted to find out.  But the other part… _'two more minutes'._  He had been standing in the hall for three minutes now, all but actively trying not to think about it—SeeD, trying not to think about how badly he wanted to go back.  But, it was Squall's call either way, and the young man was not as forgiving as his father, that is what Seifer had always assumed.  At least, he'd assumed that before now, when an image of him swatting Irvine, and another of him giving his father a brief hug, passed through his mind.  The kicker though, the kicker was the tiny smirk and chuckle at Laguna's barefoot and totally unprepared state of dress.  He was beginning to think Squall wasn't quite what he'd always thought.  'Wishful thinking,' he decided, kicking off the wall.  _'One more minute.'_ His mind counted down the gentle ticks of the arms on the watch's face.

So, Seifer Almsay, once again, made up his mind.  He stared down the endless hallway before him,  twelve seconds, eleven, ten, and then, turning around, pulled a cigarette out of his pocket and went back the way he came, slowly, pulling out a small silver lighter, and bringing it to the cancerous stick dangling between his lips before putting the lighter away, deciding not to light the cigarette after all.  He held the fragile paper-wrapped nicotine between two long fingers, nails slightly yellowed from casual contact with these things and, after a moment's decision, put it behind his right ear.  'Maybe I'll quit, if I'm allowed back in Garden,' he thinks absently.  '…maybe.'

*****

Jynx stared at the black and white footage as it walked away from its duties, a sigh hovering on her lips that never escaped.  The main security office.  She was alone here now, a luxury she'd earned thorough diligence, hard work, and the careful process of instilling fear into her subordinates.  It was an art form, really, though she doubted anyone else saw it that way.  Anyone except, perhaps, Ultimecia.  And contrary to what some might believed, Jynx hated Ultimecia—as much as she hated anyone, anyway, which wasn't actually very much, but…she was not fond of the manipulative sorceress and was glad enough to see her gone.  'Not that it really affects me personally either way,' she thought vaguely.

"So, Mr. Almsay, you've chosen those naïve dreams of yours once again, have you?" she said softly to no one in particular, herself perhaps.  "Technically, this was the right choice.  However.  However, SeeD.  That choice has made you, for all intents and purposes, my enemy.  Anyone who would use GF, anyone who would bond with one of those demons is…that's a person that I simply can't forgive."  'President Loire, you really have got yourself all tangled up in one hell of a mess, haven't you?' she thought before turning her back on the many-screened console and closing the door on the blonde figure  who she'd been watching for the past two minutes, leaving only the lingering darkness of an unlit room between them.  She looked at her watch as the second hand ticked onto the twelve resting there and said inaudibly, "it looks, Mr. Almsay, as if your time is up," before heading down the North corridor once again to continue her usual rounds.

*****

So, uhm, yeah, chapter 25.  This one definitely caught me off guard.  I had no idea it was going to go in this direction when I sat down with it.  I also didn't think Seifer would be so involved in the story line.  I think it's safe to say, at this point, that I have no clue what's going to happen next.  I got carried away and now this lil' ol' story is practically writing herself!  So, though I have one or two definite things, for the most part, I'm really at a loss on this one.  I'll have to write more soon(so I can find out what happens next!  Haha.)

Until next time, 

Happy Haunting,

~Banshee Puppet~


	27. Chapter TwentySix

Okay, so the obligatory commentary and rant:

*Clears throat* ahem….

_Lunatic Pandora1_:  hrm…that woulda been funny! Hehe.  Actually, when Irvine says "uncle 'guni"…I was torn, half wanted to say "guni" the other half wanted to say "laguna", but I went with the familiar because I didn't feel like freaking out the poor sales girl.  Dunno, guess I just wasn't in the mood, or something. *shruggs*  

_Aison_:  che.  Me too darlin'.  Actually, I think I have.  Man, my feet were really cold.

_Divine Star_: Yippee!! A new reviewer!  I was afraid everyone had stopped reading my story.  It made me sad.  But you've proved me wrong…and in such an ENTHUSIASTIC way, what with all the CAPITAL LETTERS and what not! Tehe.  Well, the story will end…eventually, as stories tend to do, but, not yet.  A few chapters back I had anticipated thirty chapters, but looking at the story now, I don't think that's going to be enough.  At least 8-10 more chapters, maybe?  Fact is, I don't really know.  I have two more story chunks I want to get through before I'm comfortable wrapping this up, and I feel that the story won't be resolved until I've done that, so as much as I would like to finish this story soon, I'm not about to rush it.  As long as I've been living with this story and these characters, I want to make sure I do it right, so…it'll take me as long as it takes me, I suppose.  Thanks for reviewing and letting me know that people out there are still reading this! *grins*

Special notes: a * in the front or back of a sentence/paragraph, signifies the beginning/end of a flashback.  

And without further adieu, Chapter Twenty-Six of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"…

***

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

By: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Six

***

Squall scowled at the cheerful silver snowflakes and the evil roll of scotch tape.  Whoever said wrapping Christmas presents was fun was either a liar, or insane.  An image of a small, bubbly girl in a yellow dress saying, "let's blow it to smithereens! Wohoo!" tumbled through his mind.  Definitely insane, he decided.

He scowled at the emerald-eyed imp that Irvine was so infatuated with.  "Stop giggling and show me how to do this," he barked, and  as she flitted over, saying, "Sir Laguna is going to look so handsome in his new clothes!" a memory hit squall.

* "Hey tulip! You know a lot about jewelry, right? Take a look.  Whaddya think?  Selphie'll like it, right?"

Squall looked blankly at the tiny gold band with it's little heart-shaped diamond, almost pink in the light.  Small and delicate, just the right size for someone as tiny as Selphie, but definitely not cheap.

"It looks a lot like a…"

"Wedding ring," Irvine finished for him with the tiniest smile, an almost reverent look on his face. "I was thinking, New Year's.  I want it to be special."

"You're sure?"

"It's the first time I've been sure of anything, you know…since Bella Maure.  I've thought about it for a long time.  I…Squall, I want you to be…my, uh…well, that is, if she says yes I—I'd like…" Irvine stuttered.  As silly as it was, it was endearing.

Squall touched his forearm gently through layers of leather and suede and said, "It'll look good on her."*

The door swung open just as Squall was imperfectly, yet meticulously, and with intense concentration, putting the last bit of tape on his father's present, scowling at the box as he did so.

"Squall!"

"Seifer," Squall bit out in his customary fashion, but almost regretted it when he saw doubt and worry passing through the taller man's eyes.

"I need to talk to you, privately…please."

Squall worried that it might be about Laguna, until he heard those words.

***

Laguna held up the brightly-wrapped package and grinned.

"It's darling, Uncle Laguna," Ellone smiled, chuckling softly.  "Do you think he'll like it?" Laguna asked, biting his lower lip.

"As long as it's from you, he'll love it.  It doesn't really matter what it is," a voice said from the doorway.

Laguna's eyes darted up.

"Ah, Quistis! Come in! Come in!  What's up?"

***

"What do you want, Seifer?" Squall asked, his words curt and clipped.  Laguna would be pissed off if the boys got into a fight on Christmas Eve, and lately, Squall found himself caring about his father's rather explosive mood swings.

He'd never seen the man angry before, but after dropping an ornament that happened to be one of Laguna's favorites, it was easy to understand why Ellone, Kiros, and Ward worked so hard to keep his father placated.  Because, fact was, facing off a quiet, glaring Laguna Loire was like staring into the eye of a storm, and when the explosion came, you were never ready for it.  Squall rubbed his arm absently where Laguan had slapped him when he called him "stupid" and shoved him into the corner to "go mope, or something!  It seems to be what you're best at.  And DON'T YOU DARE touch my ornaments again until you've decided you aren't a total, irreconcilable klutz!"  This coming from him!  Apparently his father took the holidays VERY seriously.  Well, Squall resolved  not to think about it, at least for the moment.

"I want to come back," Seifer blurted it out, not knowing, after a moment's thought, how to ease into the conversation.  "To Garden.  I want to come back."

"I was wondering when you were going to get around to asking that," Squall stated blandly.

Seifer blinked.  And then, he blinked again.  Squall had known all along that he intended to…  "Then why the hell didn't you say anything!?!" Seifer fumed.  Oh, now he was pissed.

Squall sighed.  "Seifer, you almost killed us all.  I'm the Commander of Garden now.  I have to keep everyone's best interest in mind.  But…if Laguna will give you a letter of recommendation, then I guess you can come back…on probation.  It's standard procedure."

"For terrorists," Seifer spat.

"Yeah," Squall said flatly.  "And?  That's the offer.  Take it or leave it.  Now it's Christmas Eve and you're pissing me off, and I don't need to get slapped again just because I kicked your ass, so I'm going back to deal with that maniac Irvine calls a girlfriend now."

***

"Whaddya mean we have no cranberries!" Laguna turned white as a sheet, looking as if panic was gonna start in and he was going to start panicking, or yelling, or doing something else that no one really wanted him to do.

"It's no big deal uncle 'guni, we can have canned cranberry sauce instead.  We don't have to make it from scratch if…"

"We most certainly CAN NOT!" Laguna huffed.  "I'll have to go get some cranberries myself then!"

Squall grabbed the keys off of the hook before Laguna could reach them and opened the door.

"Squall."

"I'm not letting you drive in the mood you're in.  Somebody'll get killed."

"Oo!  I'm coming too!" Irvine decided happily.  "If Squall's driving it's bound to be an adventure!" he joked.

"Shut up duck boy."

"Whatever, tulip."

***

okies, another short chapter, but stuff starts happening again in the next chapter, or should.  This took me longer than usual to write, b/c well, halfway through I decided to write inuyasha stuff..sooo…meh.

But yay, another chapter done.  Laguna is so…manic. Haha.  


	28. Chapter TwentySeven

Lunatic Pandora1: you are SO right on that one.

Divine Star: my sweet old time?  I add a chapter like every week!?!  Lol.  Sometimes two.  Geez, impatient much? Haha.  Hey, I'm doing the best I can, between two jobs and karate, it's a miracle I have time to do anything but sleep, and I don't even do very much of that. *pouts*  Ah well, you'll just have to content yourself with once a week and be happy that I'm not making you wait as long as I'm making my Inuyasha people wait…b/c I left them stranded for like 3 months.

Anyways, I still don't own FF8…I do own… … …a computer… an old computer… a temperamental computer that hates me.  

````

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Seven

````

"So much for adventure," Irvine grumbled.  They'd been to almost every open supermarket and vendor they could find, and Squall was being cautious on the roads of Esthar, much more careful than he had a habit of being on the way to Balamb.  'Must have something to do with the fact that these Estharian roads aren't actually on the ground,  and it'll be harder to get them back from one of his "short-cuts".  Or it could be that Laguna's in the car.  He's awfully gentle when it comes to his dad.  Hmm. Better not say that out loud.'  

Frankly, he was just leaning back, pushing his hat down over his eyes to settle in for a nap when he was jolted forward with a screeching of tires. 'Spoke too soon!' his mind demanded as his hands darted out to the back of Squall's seat to see what the hell was going on…

"Squall! Lookout!  There's a …"

"Shit!  Where the hell did SHE come from!"  

Squall swerved and slammed on the breaks.  'Phew.'  That little girl came out of nowhere.

Laguna stumbled out of the car and rushed over to the girl.  "H-hey!  Little girl.  Are you okay?!?"   He reached a hand out to touch her shoulder and turn her around when Squall noticed something strange.  

"Dad! Don't…!'  She was emitting some sort of strange pinkish light, and the baby doll she carried wasn't actually a baby doll at all.  It looked…alive.  "DAD!"   But it was too late.  The girl turned, smiling up at him, and a harsh echo exploded out of her throat.  "SOLAR FLARE!"

Laguna just barely dodge it, acting on instinct.  "Open the trunk!" the older man said, even as he dove in that direction.  Squall asked without question, even as Irvine scrambled out of the back seat, shielding his eyes and reaching blind for his shotgun.  

"Th-those eyes.  Squall it's a…"

Squall grit his teeth and nodded, drawing his gunblade to prepare for battle.  "Check your junctions Irvine.  It's a GF."

"Shit.  If I knew I was gonna need 'em…" Irvine cursed under his breath, which told Squall exactly what he needed to know before Laguna skidded into place between the two boys, yanking back the safety of his machine gun.  

"So that's a GF, huh?" he asked vaguely.  "This ain't gonna be easy."

"Any items on you?" Squall asked.

"A few," Laguna grit out as he shot at the little girl.  "But shooting at a little girl feels kinda wrong."

"Stop thinking like that right now, or we're toast," Irvine said, taking his turn.  'His aim doesn't suck,' he thought of Laguna's last go.

Squall took his turn to call Carbuncle, and was surprised when the "doll" in the girl's arms spun around and sucked up the ability, casting shell and protect on itself and the girl.  "MIRROR FORCE," It said, the voice a somewhat different echo, a very subtle difference, but there.

'Okay, so, magic is a bad idea,' Squall thought.  'Just great.'

Laguna tossed a "dispel" at the GF,  which had the lovely result of dispelling everything all the way around as the mirror force spell reacted again, like a reflex.

"Okay, so, I have an idea…sorta," Laguna said.  "You guys try to shatter that mirror, and I'll do the rest, 'kay?"

"Dad!"

"Squall, trust me.  I may be old, but I'm not as out of practice as some people like to believe, alright."

He didn't really have any choice.  They didn't have time to argue, he knew it as well as anyone.  But it was rough going, what with Irvine having to throw potions one way or another every other turn, but eventually, the mirror doll shattered, and the rumbling echo came out of the girl again.  "YOU WON'T DEFEAT THIS SOLARIS SO EASILY. I'LL ONLY JUNCTION TO SOMEONE REALLY STRONG."  And then, they saw it, this time, they had time to see it, "SOLAR FLARE!"  It was a pistol.  A…and the way the GF moved…

Laguna gaped. "Jace?!?"

They were in bad shape.  Squall cast a phoenix down on Irvine, who promptly executed a special, followed, by Laguna's Desperado, and Squall started throwing Curagas around, starting with Laguna, while Irvine attacked with every powerful item in his arsenal.  But Squall blinked at what finally brought GF Solaris down, as Laguna, GF-less, somehow managed an Ultima.

"How did you?!?"  

"Uhm…good question?" Laguna offered, scratching the back of his head.  "Let's not worry about it for now, kay?"

And before any objections could be voiced, GF Solaris spoke once again.   "I UNDERSTAND."  Hyne, that voice was so deep and loud.  "THIS SOLARIS WILL FOLLOW YOU, THEN, AS THEY WISHED IT, LAGUNA LOIRE."  And  fading into a speck of light, Solaris imprinted itself on Laguna's mind through a gold swirling light that pulled it in through the third eye.

Irvine reached out and caught Laguna as he lapsed from consciousness, shock etched on his features as he mumbled too familiar names.  "Jace?  Raine?  You're…Solaris?" he mumbled before falling silent.

The ride home was quiet until Laguna woke halfway through. 

"I guess they're okay then?" Irvine asked when Laguna seemed to have shaken the last bit of fog out of his brain.  "Mo..uh…-Jace and Raine?"  He spoke more softly than was his habit, but it was a tender subject they were touching on.  Squall, on the other hand, said nothing.  He'd heard all that he needed to know.  Raine and Jace had become GF Solaris, and they were with Laguna now.  They would always be with Laguna.

But neither young man was expecting what Laguna said next.   Honestly, and without hesitation, Laguna blinked, furrowed his brow, and asked, "who?"

"You're sister and wife, dad, Jace and Raine," Squall sighed, thinking the older man just hadn't heard right.

"Huh?  Squall, did you hit your head or something?  Sister?  I'm an only child, you know that, and I never got married, at least, not to my knowledge." 

And the genuinely perplexed expression on Laguna's face told Squall and Irvine all they needed to know.

Squall grit his teeth together.  'Damn you, Solaris.'

```

Well, that was a plot twist, ne?  Uhm, only problem is, I haven't got the foggiest what happens next, so assume a little extra time before the next chapter, I need a few days to let new developments settle and fester n'stuff.

Well, ja ne!

Happy Haunting,

~Banshee Puppet~


	29. Chapter TwentyEight

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Eight

***

Irvine pouted.  Happy Holidays?  Yeah right.  Ever since they'd gotten out of the car and Laguna had gone on his merry, now oblivious, way, he and Squall had been at one another's throats, and he'd had just about all he could take.

Squall sighed.  "All I'm saying is, as much as it sucks, maybe it's what's best for him now.  Remembering them hurts him so much.  Maybe this is what they wanted for him."

"No!  I can't believe that Squall, I won't!  Mom wouldn't…well, okay, maybe she would, but not if it would make things difficult on us, you know that as well as I do.  That thing, that GF, it may have come from her, but, it's not her, not really.  And it's not Raine either.  So stop thinking like that.  We have to make him remember...because…because his memory of them is really all he has.  He would want to remember, Squall, you must know that.  As soon as he realizes that his memory has holes in it, he's going to do whatever it takes to fill the voids there."  This argument was exhausting Irvine.  And just when he was trying to figure out the next defense of his argument, Squall let out a disgruntled sigh and rested his chin on his palm.  

"I guess you're right.  I just…"

"Hate seeing him sad?  Yeah, I know Squall, me too.  So…what are we going to do?"

Squall looked up into Irvine's dark eyes and said, "we should talk to Ellone.  But let's wait until after Christmas.  It's only another day, and…he should at least have this one day, his favorite day to not have to worry about anything."

Irvine gave Squall a soft smile.  "You're a lot kinder than you pretend to be, tulip," he teased, smirking.

"And if you tell anyone, cowboy, I'm going to kick your ass."

***

Seifer winced.  Laguna was…whining.  Again.  Or maybe a better word would be—still.  "Jyyynnnxxxxx!  Come ooonnnn!  It's Christmas Mooorrrnniing!  Can't you pretend to have a personality for half an hour and come join us for breakfast just this once!  It wouldn't kill you, would it!?!" Laguna demanded.

Jynx stared at the i.c.d.(intercom monitor display)--surely the President of Esthar could find better uses for his viscom system than _this--_and Laguna, with a coffee and a santa hat half-covering his face.    "I can't be certain, Mr. President," Jynx replied blandly.  "But it might."  It was her usual silky, flat tone, so it took Seifer a moment to register what just happened.  He blinked.  And then, he blinked again.

"Holy shit Jynx.  Did you just crack a joke?!?" He grinned.  "That was awesome!"

Jynx looked up at Seifer over the rim of her sunglasses, saying nothing for a moment before noting idly.  "Is there a reason, Mr. Almsay, that you still insist following me around?  As I hear it, you are no longer in my employ, after all."

"Well, that's true," Seifer said hesitantly.  "But, I'm still trying to figure out what your deal is, you know, so I think I'll follow you around for a while longer yet."

"Do as you wish."

"Planned to, thanks.  It's not like you can threaten to fire me for not following orders anymore, you know."

"…"

"So, on that note, how about I "follow" you down to the dining room?  I'm starving, and I honestly don't know how you managed to listen to Laguna whine at you over the viscom for forty minutes without giving in.  Everyone in the palace hates you for this, you realize."

"Everyone in the palace hates me for a lot of things, Mr. Almsay.  A little more ammunition is meaningless."

Seifer let off a loud and deliberate sigh.  He made a display of it. Then, taking steps so he was in front of Jynx, he attempted the "puppy dog eyes" as a last ditch effort.  "Please?" he asked tentatively.

"I've suddenly become rather hungry.  I'm going to get some food.  You can do as you like," Jynx said flatly.

'Shit,' Seifer thought.  'That _actually_ worked?!?  Of all the things to…'

"Jyynnnxxx!" Laguna whined over the viscom.

"Oh for cryin' out loud, Laguna!  She caved okay, just shut. up."

***

"…puhlllleeeeaaasssee," Laguna was whining into the dining room unit, much to the chargrin of his tablemates, when Jynx walked in, Seifer only a step behind her.   The tall blonde threw his lighter at Laguna, and it resounded against his skull with a satisfying "thunk".  

"We're here, so you can shut up now," he said, cocking an eyebrow heavenwards.  

Jynx, on the other hand, said nothing, merely took a small stem of grapes off of the table, and propped herself up attentively in the corner, munching while she played bodyguard.

'Girl doesn't know how to relax,' Seifer groaned mentally as he looked at her in disbelief.  It was Christmas, for cryin' out loud.  Didn't that mean anything to her?  Well, apparently not.  'What the hell happened with you?' he wondered.  'Adel.  Ultimecia.  You were involved.  I know you were.  What I don't know, is how.  And…why?'  Well, Laguna and Selphie had enough Christmas spirit for the lot of them, so he supposed the fact that she was, present, was just going to have to be enough to sate the older man for now.  

Laguna shoved his oversized hat up, revealing mirthful emerald eyes as he sipped his coffee.  Hyne, everyone was so happy, it was contagious, and Seifer couldn't help but smile a little, even if, he realized, this was his first Christmas without Fujin and Raijin by his side, and he hoped it would be the last.  And then, Laguna sat next to the tree, passing gifts to Selphie to give to their individual owners.  Squall rolled his eyes and chuckled at the moomba snow globe he pulled out of the brightest wrapping paper he'd ever seen…almost as bright as Laguna's red shirt.  Zell cheered happily over the same subscription that someone got him every year.  _'Chicken, you're such a dork,_' Seifer thought fondly.  Rinoa cuddled happily up to the four foot tall teddy-bear that Quistis gave her, instantly deciding to name it "Squall Jr.".  Sometimes that woman was too cute for her own good.  Quistis, after receiving her gift, curled up contently in the corner with her new book.  Irvine started tinkering with his new upgrade even before he'd managed to unwrap it all the way.  Ellone draped her scarf around her head like a hindi woman.  Selphie jumped and hopped and sought out the nearest stereo to play the newest "Demolition Divas" album…and dance around the room like a nutjob, before unceremoniously plopping a small, yet mildly heavy box, into Seifer's right hand and announcing, "to Seifer, from Laguuuuna!" 

Seifer's eyes widened and darted up the the dark-haired man, who blushed slightly, and scratched the back of his head.  "It's…ah…nothin' big," Laguna said.  "Just, ya know, ta say thanks n'all.  Go on.  Open it already."

Seifer tore off the paper and struggled with the tiny cardboard box for a moment before eyeing the tiny silver weight in the palm of his hand.  It was a zippo lighter, silver, with a red and gold phoenix emblazoned onto one side.  He didn't have the heart to tell his former boss that he'd quit smoking yesterday.  He would find a use for the gift if it killed him…of cancer or otherwise.

"Thanks," he said, his voice sounding hoarser than he'd intended.  He just hadn't expected…and it was so thoughtful, even though Laguna hated that he smoked.

Laguna whispered something in Selphie's ear, to which the girl chuckled, before bouncing over to Jynx and said, "Mr. President Loire sir requests that Officer Jynx of the Security Division join him next to the eight foot tall fire hazard…I think that means Laguna wants you to go sit by the tree with him."

Jynx stared at Laguna for a moment through dark sunglasses, her eyes unable to be seen beneath the dark lenses that covered them, but finally, after a few more moments, she moved next to Laguna and stared down at him.

"Sit down, Jynx, you're making me nervous," Laguna teased gently.  

She didn't make any note of the joke, leaving the others unsure as to whether she even caught it at all.  "What is it, President Loire?" she asked as she kneeled beside him, the scabbard of her katana chinking lightly against the ground.

Laguna pulled a tiny package out of his pocket and said, "Merry Christmas, Jynx."  Jynx just stared at the happy little box in his palm for a few long moments.  "Please take it," he said softly.  "I thought a lot about this present, so, I want you to have it."

"You make no sense," Jynx told him flatly, taking the box from him with her right hand, using the claw on her left arm to slice open the paper, and fumbling with the box inside, rather than taking the weapon off for the two seconds required for the task at hand.  A clawed finger slipped gently under the chain and lifted it.  A necklace.  Silver chain, and onyx set into a simple pendant.  The kanji written there: shin.  _'Shin. Core.  Heart.  Center.'_  The word echoed through her for a moment, and silently, she looked up at her employer, perplexed, but showing no sign of it.  And that's when she saw it—something swirling behind his eyes, as if…as if he wasn't alone in there.  It was a state familiar to her.  She knew what it meant, had seen it too many times to not know it.  Had found herself, unfortunately, on the wrong end of it more than once.  Irvine had it.  Squall had it.  They all did, except for Rinoa, who was a sorceress, and Seifer, but he would have it too soon, now that he was going back.  …and now Laguna had it too.  Laguna Loire, had changed, he wasn't…alone in there…anymore.  _'GF.  Damnit!  How could you!'_ her mind demanded, feeling betrayed.  She had no right to feel that way, she knew it, but she also knew something else.  "Mr. Loire.  Please rethink this one more time," she said.  He didn't understand what she meant, it had something to do with that pendant, but also something to do with something much larger.  And one answer would be suitable for both.

"There's nothing to rethink, Jynx.  It's a gift, and it's yours," Laguna answered.  "What's the problem?"  Worry.  She could see it in his features and it made no sense.  Why worry?  About her?  Didn't he know it, what she was?  Of course he knew.  He was the only person who knew.  She had sacrificed what little humanity she had a long time ago.  What he didn't know is that she had done it all, because of GF, to hunt them down, to destroy them.  What he didn't know, is that she had done everything, because of GF.

_'If that's the case, then I can't follow you anymore,'_ she thought.  The thought made her sad, though she was incapable of showing that, really.  She just didn't know how anymore, maybe she never knew in the first place.  "… …I understand," she said, standing.  "But, if that's the case, then I'm going to be forced to resign my position as an officer of Esthar."

Laguna blinked, then he blinked again.  Seifer's jaw worked, but no sound came out.  If she wasn't a Captain of Security in Esthar, what _was_ Jynx, exactly?  Was she anything at all?

"Y-you can't!  Jynx!  If you do that then I have to…I have to!!!" Laguna swallowed hard, leaping to his feet.

"You'd better have me executed, President Loire.  If you don't…it will only make things far too complicated," she said evenly, as if it didn't matter, as if she didn't care.  It was just…the way things were for her.  And at that, Seifer felt a slight pain in his chest.  This was just the thing about her that always pissed him off.

"NO!" Laguna demanded.  "N-no."  But he took a deep breath, locking eyes with Kiros, then Ward, and the two men came over.  She just stood there as they stripped her of her weapons and anything else she might be able to use in a spontaneous assault, even though they all knew she wouldn't do it.  Not a chance.

Laguna slipped the santa hat remorsefully off of his head, trailing long, dark strands haphazardly about his face.  Squall knew the dire expression he wore now.  He had dropped into "president" mode, and he was about to do what was necessary, while the once festive group held their breath, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Jynx Arashi.  In the name of the government of Esthar, and in the best interest of all the nations of the world, I, Laguna Loire, President of Esthar, hereby place you under arrest.  For conspiring with Ultimecia against the better interest of this world, and for innumerable crimes against humanity, I sentence you to life imprisonment, with no chance of parole."  His expression was dark.  He didn't want to do it, but…he really…as President of Esthar, he really, had no choice.  Jynx had committed far too many atrocities to be allowed to walk the world freely; even as a young woman in his employ, they both knew, she was under careful watch.  Two prisons, one more honest than the other, but both prisons, nonetheless.  

Laguna gave a nod to his friends and comrades, who gave him a saddened look and obeyed him, as their president.  "Take her away," he said softly.

Kiros gave him a soft nod.  "I'll take care of everything, Laguna."

Falling sadly back into the nearest chair, Laguna sighed miserably.  "Stupid," he chastised himself.  _'If I didn't give her that pendant she'd still be…all the same, maybe this is what she wanted all along.  Who can ever tell when it comes to her?'_

There was a long silence before Irvine let out a low whistle, at the point when he couldn't take it anymore.  "Some Christmas this turned out to be," he grumbled.

***

pouts.  Christmas was supposed to be merry!  But, once again, I find that angst has a way of following me around.  Well, anyways, that's it for this chapter!


	30. Chapter TwentyNine

Okey dokey, I've reevalutaed the rest of this story a bit, and think it's going to go slightly differently than I initially planned, partially because two of my three reviewers have expressed something of an interest in Jynx, who, for all intents and purposes, was supposed to be a very minor character, showing up when I needed her.  So, although her story wasn't actually intended to be part of this story, I think, having used her much more than I anticipated, it's almost necessary to continue with her at this point, which I guess is okay, since this story is full of Ocs anyway, so if it was gonna be any story, it might as well be this one. So, once again, this story is going in a direction other than the one I'd planned.  I don't believe I'll tell Jynx's ENTIRE story through "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer", but I think some small amount of explanation is required for her actions after the last chapter, so, we'll see what I decide in the end.  Anyway, I guess, fact is, once again, I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing, but I think the story will flow better this way, so I'm going for it. 

_Aison_ this ought to make you pretty happy, though I still don't envision a Seifer/Jynx in the near future.  Maybe eventually, as a separate story?  I dunno, but I don't envision that as being something that happens in this story.  It's not really a romance, or anything like that, after all.  Uhm, so, yeah, but I guess that isn't set in stone, or whatever.

_Lunatic Pandora1_, all I can really say without ruining the story is that Jynx DOES have her reasons for her behavior, and right, wrong, or indifferent…well, that hasn't got much to do with it, I'm afraid.  Sufficed to say, she hates Ultimecia as much as anyone, possibly even more, in her Jynx sorta way.  *smirks mischievously* Stick with me though, and I might just surprise you. ;-)

`````

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Twenty-Nine

````

Seifer found himself on the roof, again.  It was snowing, but he didn't mind, not really.  He had a lot to think about.  It was Christmas, but the holiday season wasn't turning out to be as happy as it was supposed to be, which didn't bode well for the new year ahead.  He scowled at the cigarette between calloused fingers, at aforementioned fingers, and then back at the cigarette.  He placed the slim stick between his lips and pulled his zippo out of his pocket to light it.  _'I'll quit some other time.  Heh.  Guess I found a use for Laguna's gift after all.  Well, that's just fine.  I'll nurse this habit for as long as I need to.'_

He took a long drag and exhaled the bitter air when footsteps behind him alerted him to the presence of another.  At first, he thought, _'it must be Laguna.'_  But their usual rooftop greetings were foregone.  There was no "I thought I'd find you up here." No "that's a nasty habit, you know."  He would have liked to entertain the thought that it was Jynx, who would stand there staring at him until he deemed it time to turn around.  Then, and only then, would she speak, and it was usually to say something inconsequential, like "if you're quite finished, Mr. Almsay, we have a lot of work to do." Or even, simply, "Time to go."  But it wasn't Jynx, and it never would be again.  A slight clinking of metal as the person walked told him all he needed to know about his visitor, as a shaggy-haired brunette leaned against the cold railing beside him.  Squall was wrapped tightly in the layers of his jacket.  He hated the cold and they both knew it.  He was putting himself out to be here now.  That thought pulled at the corner of Seifer's lips for a moment, a bittersweet smirk of acknowledgement.

It was after a few long moments of silence that Squall spoke.  "What was she to you?" he asked.  Seifer's jaw worked slightly.  Squall was talking about Jynx in the past tense, as if she was already dead…and then green eyes widened marginally as Seifer realized, that, just maybe, once again, Squall had figured out something that no one else had realized.  Talking about her in the past tense was exactly the right thing.  He knew, because Squall would never do something like that without thinking about it.  _'Don't talk about me in the past tense!  Don't ever talk about me like that!'_  Squall had demanded of Seifer once, many years ago, during one of his explosions.  They were rare, but they did occur from time to time.  No, Squall knew exactly what he was saying.  And it bit into Seifer that he was exactly right to do so.

The question though, it was one he'd never even asked himself, not really.  But the answer bubbled right up to the surface, like it had been waiting for someone to ask it for a very long time.  So Seifer answered.

"She was my friend," he told the other man.  "And she was in pain."  A long silence passed between them, long enough for Seifer to finish his cigarette at leisure.  "Jynx…accepted me, no questions asked, when no one else would.  I guess, knowing what I know now, the reasons for that are obvious.  After all, who was she to judge?  And it's not really as if she cared.  She looks at everyone the same way she looked at me, back then.  But at that place, in that time… … it meant a lot, that's all.  Ya know, puberty boy, I don't think I can go back to Garden just yet.  I want to, but there's something else I have to do first.  Just…wish I knew what that something was."

Squall rolled his eyes.  Yeah, he understood. All the same, Seifer could be such a drama queen.  "Well, I guess the offer stands, as long as you don't get yourself into too much trouble in the interim," he said in bored tones.

"Don't worry about me!  I'm resilient!" Seifer smirked.  "Just tell Fujin and Raijin to stay put, alright.  I'm coming home."

"…Whatever."

Another considerable silence passed between them, almost companionable…almost.  Old habits are hard to break, after all.

"Hey, Squall.  Something happened to Laguna last night, didn't it?  He seems, I dunno, a little off, somehow."

"We ran into a GF.  He'll survive."  _'He always does.'_

"Not EXACTLY what I asked, you know."

"Irvine and I are taking care of it," Squall said flatly.  

"Is there…anything…I mean, fact is, Laguna helped me out a lot…it's not like I'm being sentimental, or anything," he qualified quickly. "I just owe him one, ya know?"

Squall's head dropped slightly, stormy eyes hidden beneath layers of hair.  He really wasn't very good at concealing his emotions anymore, it seemed, thanks to Rinoa.  "Just…it's sort of…a family thing.  In a way…"  This was too complicated, too much to explain, too much to understand.  Seifer wanted to help?  That was a joke, he didn't even know if there was anything he, himself, could do, or if he was supposed to.  In spite of Irvine's adamant arguments, Squall still wasn't certain that they were doing the right thing.

Seifer let off another one of his deliberate sighs.  "What in Hyne's name _happened_ two years ago?" he complained.

***

"Uncle 'guni?" Irvine asked, sitting next to the other man, who had been sitting on the sofa, cursing under his breath for almost an hour.  "Why don't you tell me about her.  It'd make you feel better, right?"

"You keep calling me "uncle", Irvine," Laguna said softly.  "I'm forgetting something important, aren't I?  Something vital."

"Worry about that later, kay?  One thing at a time."

"We found her out in the wild, outside of the city, sort of wandering, fighting off monsters along the way, but what struck me most was that she was carrying a man twice her size on her shoulders.  He was unconscious, maybe dead.  Where was she taking him—I didn't know.  It wasn't until a while later, that we realized that it was Seifer.  And the rest just fell into place. When I asked her why she chose to work for Ultimecia, all she said was "because, at that time, she was the only one strong enough to do it".  Other than that, Irvine, I don't really know much more than you do.  I never found out what "it" was, what she's trying to do.  I just know that it's very important to her. But, her eyes, something happened, something that she can't get over.  So even if she was a devil back then, I can forgive her everything, as a man.  But as the President of Esthar, I…well, I can't really afford to.  She's a dangerous woman.  And Seifer, also, is a dangerous man.  They won't be forgiven so easily, but they'll keep chasing their dreams, no matter what."

"Dreams?  Or nightmares?  I'm starting to wonder, to tell you the truth un…ah…Laguna."

"It's alright, Irvine.  You can call me Uncle.  In fact, I'd almost rather you did, in spite of everything.  It just…feels right."  Laguna sighed slightly, like he had so many times when he was telling Irvine about his mother what seemed like a lifetime ago now.  "Jynx.  She told me, the day I hired her.  "You'd better keep a close eye on me, Mr. Loire.  I'm bound to betray you eventually."  I didn't believe her.  I didn't believe she was capable of something like that.  Do you think she is, Irvine?  Do you think she's as bad as she thinks she is?  As bad as she's proven herself to be?"

"I don't know, uncle 'guni.  Things are just…complicated, right now."

***

"You did WHAT?!?" Irvine demanded, jaw working, but no sound coming out.

"I told him everything.  Solaris, Jace, Bella Maure.  All of it," Squall said flatly, keeping his distance from the cowboy, who was fuming, not because it was Seifer, really.  It could have been anyone.  But Jace was… … For Irvine, Jace was a family thing, a private issue—he just didn't want to share her with anyone else, not even the memory of her.

"Why in hell would you want to tell Seifer Almsay about all that?"  Irvine was at a loss.  What was going through Squall's mind.  I mean, granted, Seifer wasn't as bad as he used to be but, it didn't make him any less…well…Seifer! 

"Because he asked," Squall answered flatly.  "He wanted to know."

"That's it?"  Irvine raised a skeptical eyebrow.  "Because he wanted to know?"

"My dad, he likes Seifer.  Hyne knows why, so if Seifer wants to try and help, I guess that's okay, as strange as it all is.  I want to do as much for Laguna as possible, Irvine.  So just forget about it, okay.  Maybe Seifer can think of something we haven't been able to.  That's why I told him.  Because I hope he can think of something.  As much of a bastard as he can be, he's…resilient.  He'll think of something, something we missed."

***  
  


Kiros Seagill—a.k.a., the man who always takes care of everything.  "I'd be lying if I didn't tell you that I think this all sucks, Jynx.  But even so, you're pretty lucky it was Laguna, and not somebody else."

"Lucky?  Is that really so true?  He's made a mistake, Mr. Seagill.  You should make him understand.  If he doesn't kill me, someday, I'll probably get out of here, and I'll probably do something bad.  Not that I'm planning it, really, but it's not my nature to sit still for very long.  And I haven't changed.  I haven't changed at all, since the war."

"Can I ask what it was about that pendant that set you off, Jynx?"  Kiros asked evenly.

"It wasn't the pendant, not really.  Although, this thing.  Shin.  He has me figured all wrong.  I'm not the center of anything.  Nothing will ever be born out of my actions.  A world without people like me ought to exist, but it doesn't, and since that's true, it is totally fine that my every action leads me down the road of vengance.  Revenge.  Mr. Loire asked me once, what it was that I wanted.  If it suits you to do so, you may tell him, my answer is…revenge.  He's a good man, I suppose, by all the usual standards, but fact is, I saw something in his eyes today that I didn't like."

"You're a complex woman."

"Why don't you say what you really mean, Mr. Seagill, what you thought all along.  It's not as if it matters any longer.  There's no longer any reason to keep up appearances, now that we aren't working together any longer," Jynx stated.

Kiros regarded her for a moment.  She was right, in the end, there wasn't any reason any longer…to keep up appearances.  "That day we found the two of you.  Why were you carrying Seifer on your back like that?  Why didn't you leave him?"

Softly, Jynx answered, "He would have died."

"Why do you care?  A monster like you.  Why did it matter at all?"

"Because, Kiros Seagill, at that time, I believed I'd found a kindred spirit.  I was, unfortunately, mistaken.  There simply isn't anyone else like me in this entire world.  And I suppose it wouldn't really matter, even if there was."

Kiros shook his head.  She didn't make any sense, when it came right down to it.  Revenge.  What could an automaton like Jynx possibly want revenge for?  Didn't you have to have feelings to feel betrayed?  He'd given up trying to understand.  She wasn't really any of his concern any longer, at least, not on a personal level.

"Well, Jynx Arashi.  Welcome to your new home.  Better get comfortable.  You'll be here for a while."

***

Jynx sat against the wall, letting the pendant dangling from her fingers swing back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.  Just staring at the tiny bit of starlight that twinkled off of the metal.  It was too dark to really see much else.  

She knew she wasn't alone, but couldn't locate the other party, who seemed content to mind their own business.  At least, that is what she had thought, until he spoke.

"I know where you can get it, you know," he said.

"Oh.  And which "it" would that be?"

"The power to kill GF.  I know where you can get it."

That had gotten her attention.  She cocked an eyebrow at him through the dark, just the barest hint of movement over her face, but it spoke volumes.  She was listening.

"You'd only have to do one thing for me.  Just a small favor."

"Small favors are often the ones that require the most effort," she stated blandly.

"Bring my son back to me.  I want…she took him away from me.  They stole him.  I want him back.  My son.  My son, for the power to kill GF.  You have nothing to lose, Jynx Arashi."

"Who are you?  How do you know me?" Jynx demanded, though her tone remained level.

"My son for your sister.  Little Ruvie, what's it going to be, Jynx?"

Jynx leveled her eyes on the man, wearing a slightly pained expression that looked suspiciously like a scowl.  If looks could kill, it was obvious that she would have had him by the throat.  "Never say that name," she sneered; it was more of a hiss escaping partially open lips, really.

She leaned her head against the wall where she sat, a few feet to his right.  There was silence for a long few moments while thoughts echoed through her mind.  'Ruvie I…'  The girl had always given her the stupidest looking puppy dog eyes to get what she wanted, and Jynx could never seem to refuse.

"What's your name?" she asked softly.

"My name?  They've even taken that from me, you know, "to keep you safe" they said, from _Him_.  Oh, that Kiros Seagill is a crafty man, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.  But, just between us, once, a very long while ago, my name was Max Kinneas."

Jynx raised an eyebrow at the man.  _'Kinneas?'_  Well, it didn't matter, not really.  That had nothing to do with her.  She leaned her head back against the wall and said, "alright.  But I'll do it in my own way."  When she sensed the man's body go slack, heard the heavy breathing of slumber, she whispered softly in the darkened cell.  "Shin…I will destroy every GF, Ruvie.  I swear it.  This is how I will avenge you, little sister. This is how I will avenge you and your stolen memories."  Jynx exhaled slightly, it was almost a sigh, but not really.  "Ruvie, I promise.  I won't give up.  Not until the very end."  _'Our memories make up who we are,' _Jynx thought.  _'I'll never forgive GF for stealing you away from me.'_

Jynx stared at her left hand like something foreign.  Without her claw, she felt strange.  Even in the pale starlight, she could see that the skin there was a much paler shade, and smoother, the fingers uncalloused for lack of use.  It looked like…_'a woman's hand'_—delicate, gentle, soft.  And for those reasons, it was completely useless to her, but also, she knew that it was strong, she knew it because this was her left hand, the hand that bore her claw.  The other hand still bore it's long black glove, but, the shape that she knew was underneath was far different from this apparition of skin she watched.  She leaned her head back against the cold wall.  _'These hands.  My hands.  The one thing I believed I could depend on, at that time.  My hands.  And yet, I've kept them covered for so long, that they're completely unfamiliar to me now… …  …_

_But it doesn't matter, not really.  There's only one thing that matters in this entire world.'_

And the word escaped her lips once again, a false and broken litany whispered reverently.  "Ruvie."

And in the dark, Max smiled.  Things were going exactly according to plan.

***

hokay!  Max is back!  Gyah!  Seifer gets a bigger role.  Laguna seeks out lost memories.  Once again, knowledge proves to be the key to everything, and what EXACTLY is Jynx planning to do?!?  All this and more in the coming chapters of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"!

Well kits, this chapter definitely took us in a new direction, didn't it?  All the same, I believe I am content.  Thoughts, opinions, general rants, r&r.  And until next time,

Happy Haunting,

~Banshee Puppet~


	31. Chapter Thirty

Check it out!  I'm on chapter thirty and still going!  Cripes this is turning out to be an epic of a fanfic! *dazed expression* 

I still don't own FFVIII….but I do own Max and Jynx….uhm, yeah, trust me, you don't want 'em.  They're nuts, and not that yummy kind.

I'm finally getting more reviewers again!  _AngelInnocence_, if you still remember the review you posted way back when you read chapter five, I guess you know that part one of the story had some very fun Squall/guna/Irvine moments in it, and I hope there will be more in the future, but the second section of the story seems to be a bit heavier than the first, so we'll see what I can do.  And thank you, I thought that "gooney" was a fun play on words, so I went with it.

_Lunatic Pandora1_:  As far as Max goes, you can guess all you like as to the how and why he ended up in an Estharian prison cell…but until I get there, 'tis my little secret *evil smirk*. And…odd?  I'm not sure how I should take that.  Haha.  Ah well, when in doubt, take it as a compliment, it saves you lots of trouble.  That's my motto!  Well, okay, that and "behold the power of cheese".

_I am  (…et cetera)_:

All twenty-nine chapters plus the interlude in one day! *gapes*  Wow, I know they're short chapters, but still, I'm impressed.  But seriously, I've actually been wondering when people were going to start asking those types of questions!  So I'm glad you did.  I tend to let little details seep out as the story continues, and likely would have answered all of the questions you asked over the progress of the story, but, since you asked, I'll be nice and answer….just this once.  But next time, I'm keeping all of my secrets to myself, but since I think most of the reviewers have probably guessed at most of the stuff you're asking at this point, a basic q/a sum up is okay, since I know the story has some very complex stuff in it.  So, if anyone doesn't want any quazi-spoilers, (they're not really spoilers, since you've probably guessed anyway, but uhm, yeah) then DON'T READ THIS PART.  Just skip to the title and read the chappy.

1. How did Laguna make the automatic connection between her and Ultimecia?  
Is she supposed to be Jace's sister or something like that?

"Automatic Connection" isn't exactly what I would call it.  I would actually call it skimming over details for flashbacky goodness and perusal at a later time. 0:-)  But in reality, during the second sorceress war, it was fairly well known that Seifer was working for Ultimecia/Adel(whatever).  Jynx's case was very similar, and as President, it's sort of Laguna's job to be in the know.  But even foregoing that, he first met Jynx when she was lugging Seifer around outside of Esthar, so obviously questions would be asked, and Jynx isn't ashamed of what she did, so she's not about to lie about it.  She's a criminal of war, which means she did something big. (sooo not telling!…yet.)  I know, in the context of the story, some of that seems confusing and doesn't add up just yet, but it will…when I get there. Before it goes any further, NO, Jynx is MOST DEFINITELY NOT Jace's sister.  She's not related to Jace in any way shape or form.  Although, Jynx does have a sister, two, in fact, and more on that will be revealed later on.  But the first one is, as stated, "Ruvie".  For those of you who were wondering, yes, that is the very same salesgirl that helped Squall out with Laguna's Christmas present.  The other one…well, that's my little secret.

So the short answer is, it was a deduction based on cold hard facts, more than a connection of any kind, and that will be mentioned and looked over in more detail in a later chapter…either in this story, or in the next one in the arc, if I ever finish this one.)

2.  With Laguna, why did he lose his memories so fast when everyone else did because they had used GFs for a LONG time?

This is actually more of a complicated question than it sounds.  Well, let's see if I can attack it step by step to make it easier to understand.  As you probably noticed by now, there are a handful of original GFs in this story, and though they do behave in the same fashion as the usual GFs, there is at least one major difference.  That difference is what I like to refer to as "involuntary" or "automatic" junction.  In other words, unlike Shiiva, or Ifrit, or whoever, the character doesn't choose to junction the GF, but rather, the GF chooses to junction to the character, whether the character likes it or not.  Also, unlike the normal case, the character cannot unjunction the GF in this case, because they didn't junction the GF to begin with.  In other words, much like Jace was with Crow, Laguna is stuck with Solaris, for better or worse, until death do they part.  Since this is all but unprecendented, there are bound to be some interesting side effects, and one of them is that the character suffers from much the same thing a trauma victim would suffer from, and due to the nature of GF, that trauma will likely cause problems with memory.  And though this varies from case to case, sufficed to say, despite what Squall may seem to believe, Solaris didn't DIRECTLY cause Laguna's memory loss in the way a GF would cause it over time, rather, the trauma of having Solaris suddenly and unwillingly imprinted onto his brain, has caused his memory loss. (If you recall, Jace never told Laguna how she ended up with Crow.  That also, is because she doesn't remember the events that lead directly up to it. It affects each person a little differently.)  Trauma is sort of unreliable like that.

3.  Can you maybe do a recap in the next chapter or a recap chapter? you also still haven't explained why that pendant set jynx off like that...we now know it was a word, but what is the meaning of the word, etc etc.

The word, I defined in the story, but it was probably easy to miss.  Shin, in Japanese, means "Core.  Heart. And/or Center."  It has other meanings as an adjective, but the usage I'm going with is the noun form, and a different kanji, so those meanings aren't important here.  And it wasn't the pendant, persay, that set Jynx off, though it does…remind her of something from her past (which you'll just have to keep reading to find out about).  What is more true, is that when Jynx got close to Laguna for the first time since before he "attained" GF Solaris, and in doing so, got a good look into his eyes.  Now, whether it's true in the regular ff8 timeline or not, it is true _of this story_ that when a person is junctioned to a GF, their eyes are subtly different, they give the impression of "not being alone in there", as I've stated a few times by a few different characters.  Jynx in one of the recent chapters, and Kennedy said it of Jace waaaayyyy back when.  Though it is very subtle, someone who has experience with it, WILL recognize it if they're paying attention, and Jynx has experience with it and has seen it before(for further details, you've got to wait until I get there.)  And, since Jynx hates GF more than anything, THAT is what set her off.  A woman who has sworn to destroy GF can not very well serve under a man who possesses one.  And now, I shall try to write a short recap for you.

THE STORY SO FAR:

After getting stranded in Eastern Centra, Squall and Company stumble onto a desert village, Bella Maure, where they find Laguna and a long, complicated history lesson involving the first sorceress war and Irvine's mother, who turns out to be none other than Laguna's "baby sister", though they aren't related by blood.  Ghosts of the past arrive and disappear, and tragedy strikes.  Jace is "reborn" to physical form, only to die again, and Squall, Laguna, and Irvine become much closer for the trials they've been put through.

Two years later, GF Solaris, the product of the combination of Jace and Raine's souls arrives on the scene one Christmas Eve, forcing a junction with Laguna, who, due to the trauma, loses his memory of the two women most precious to him—his sister, and his wife.

Seifer, who has been working for Laguna under the tutelage of one of the three security division Captains, a robotic sort of girl who goes only by the name "Jynx", decides to return to Garden.  And Jynx, discovering that Laguna is now harboring a GF, decides that she can no longer serve under him.  Since Jynx is a war criminal, Laguna has no choice but to place her under arrest.  Seifer discovers a friend where he thought there was only the empty shell of a woman, but his discovery is too late to do Jynx any good.  Instead, he decides to aid Squall and Irvine in trying to reinstate Laguna's memory, and Jynx retires to her new home in a dark Estharian prison cell, where she finds that her cellmate is none other than Max Kinneas(Irvine's father and Jace's abusive husband).

Max promises to tell Jynx where she can attain the power to kill GF, on the premise that she returns his son (Irvine) to him.  And her loathing of GF is so great that she agrees.  Jynx, it turns out, has sworn to take whatever measures necessary to kill all of the world's GF.  Why?  Because a GF stole her younger sister, Ruvie's, memory away from her, and this is how she has decided to go about avenging the girl.

But what will Jynx do now?  And why is Quistis so lost in thought?  Has Seifer come up with the perfect idea to restore Laguna's memory, and why is Kiros so adamantly against it?  All these questions and more will be answered in the coming chapters of  "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"…

`````

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

By: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty

`````

Quistis sat in the lazyboy beside the window, curled up with her book open and face down, in her lap.  She hadn't been reading it for a while now, choosing instead to stare out at a snow-blanketed and peaceful Esthar.  It was hard to believe that the shock of earlier today could have happened at all, as she watched the city lights dance off of white snow flakes and tumble down onto the remnants of snowmen made on the palatial lawn yesterday afternoon.  But, her heart just wasn't on Christmas right now.  Seven p.m. and as dark as any night ever was in Esthar, she sat staring out the window in the dark, reflecting on the day's events.

_'Arashi.  That's…'_ but her thought was cut off by the sound of an automatic door sliding open and flooding the room with a bit of fluorescent light.  The soft sound of worn combat boots greeted her ears as she looked up to find pale green eyes looking down at her thoughtfully, an expression that made that face look almost innocent, save the scar.  "Seifer," she said softly.  "Something I can do for you?"  Her voice cracked the silence, and she was almost ashamed of it.  It had been so peaceful here a moment ago.

Seifer leaned against the wall beside the window, the city lights casting eerie shadows over his profile.  "You shouldn't read in the dark," he said, almost as quietly, though his deeper voice gave the soft words a different effect, sadder and more forceful than Quistis's own words.

"I wasn't.  Just…thinking," Quistis said.

"About Jynx."

"Sort of."

"You don't approve of her, right?"  it almost sound like if she said yes, the answer would hurt him, but she was probably just imagining it.

"Do I deserve to be locked up like that too?  Am I just as bad as she is?  Everything was so confusing back then.  I'm still a bit confused, honestly, I don't remember much," Seifer admitted.  It must have been this long day, this weary-weaving snow that made him so open, so unlike the way he normally was around everyone.  Quistis watched his front shatter before her now, and prayed that no one came in to ruin it.

"You were just chasing your dream," Quistis offered, and had to bite back the chuckle that nearly escaped when he pouted at her.  Seifer Almsay pouted.  At first, she had thought it was a trick of the light, but it wasn't.

"I tried to kill you.  More than once," he said, and she knew he meant "you" in the more expansive sense.  The group.  "I wonder, if it was any of you who found me, at that time, under all that rubble, if you would have done the same thing for me that Jynx did, dragging my body halfway across the desert, checking up on me every day after that for three years.  She's more than we think she is.  She's not just a soldier.  I won't believe that about her."

_'Three years?!?'_ Quistis gave him a perplexed expression.  "Sounds like you were in pretty bad shape." _'Hyne Quistis, that sounds totally lame.'_

"I was comatose," Seifer answered levelly.  "It's been almost four years now, since the war, right?  My sense of time and space is still a little messed up, so I'm not sure.  I only woke up this past July.  I've been working here ever since.  Jynx and Laguna…I owe a lot to those two.  So I want to help them out.  Anyway, you've seemed a little out of sorts since this afternoon.  It's not like you to cave under pressure, so I came to find out if you knew something that the rest of us don't."

_'So THAT'S what this is all about.  Even so, I'm glad he opened up like that to me, just now.'_  "It's just the name, Seifer, that's all."

"The name?  Jynx?"

"Well, that too, I suppose.  You know, in Galbadia, a child who doesn't cry when they're born is named Jynx.  Spelled with a "y" if it's a girl, an "i", if it's a boy.  Irvine was telling us about it yesterday morning.  It's said that that child will bring shame and damnation down on their entire family.  It's just a wives tale, really, but even so, to this day, a child who doesn't cry when they're born is named Jynx, and outcast from society almost from birth.   And the family that that child is born of suffers for it, because it's a social stigma to associate with them.  But that's not really what I was talking about."  Quistis paused, letting the information sink in.

_'Then Jynx was…stigmatized…just for being born?' _Seifer realized.  He was about to ask what Quistis _did_ mean, when the blonde woman spoke again.

"Arashi.  That's Xu's last name, you know.  Well, not many people do.  She was born in Galbadia too.  It was a small town,  Shin, I think she called it.  I guess I was just wondering if there was a connection.  Your friend and Xu might be related, Seifer."

`````

Irvine scowled at the cards in his hands.  He was losing…and badly.  In fact, Selphie had already won, her hands empty of cards, and now he was fighting to stay afloat with Rinoa and Laguna, praying not to be the one with all the cards at the end.  He looked at Rinoa, who had more cards than Laguna and said, "seven".  

"Go fish!" Rinoa said a little to cheerily for Irvine's liking, and pulled another card out of the pile.  _'Damn.  Hope Squall is having more luck with Ellone than I'm having with this game.'_

"My poor Irvy is getting creamed!" Selphie chuckled.

`````

"I can't bring him back into his own memory Squall.  It's sad, but, if the memory just isn't there, isn't somewhere that I can access it, then there's nothing I can do," Ellone sighed.

"Then bring him back into mine," Squall demanded.  That, he knew, was possible, though he didn't love the idea of having Laguna poking around in his mind.  He would do whatever it took to get his father back to normal, he decided, or, as normal as Laguna ever was.

Ellone sighed.  "Squall, I'm as worried as you are, but he's still traumatized from that whole mess, from what I can tell.  It's just an all around bad idea.  There must be another way.  How did you get your memories of the orphanage back?"

Squall blinked.  "Sis, you're brilliant!  That's a GREAT idea!  I'm going to tell Irvine."

Before Ellone could get anything out of the conversation, the door was closing behind the stormy young man.  She blinked.  "What did I say?" she wondered.

`````

Jynx squinted against the light when the door opened, unaccustomed, as yet, to the darkness, as her cellmate, the ever-rambling Max Kinneas, seemed to be.  She shielded her eyes to find a familiar form bringing in their food.  Blinking back the light slightly, the back of her mind named him: _'Zekun, Oli.  Lieutenant.  Third Class. Graduated cum laude.  Top 25th percentile.'_

  
"What day is it?" she asked as he put the food down beside the door.  This wasn't usually his job, but considering it was Jynx, he'd been posted here, just in case.  Minister Kiros had insisted upon it.  It's not that he minded, really, but the work, technically, was beneath him.

" Thursday the…"

She vaguely raised a pale hand to stop his words.  "Tell me when it's Tuesday?" she asked.  "Ringing in the New Year and all.  It's…tradition, right?  I'd just like to know, if it's alright."

The man gave her a pitiable smile.  "Sure, Cap…uhm…Miss Jynx.  No problem." 

And the door closed between them once again.

"You could have taken him," Max commented, sounding none too thrilled.

"My way, Mr. Kinneas.  It is what we agreed upon."

"Why New Year's?"

"If I'm going to become a devil once again, then I would like to do so on the most important day of the year."

"The first one."

"No.  Not really.  Actually it's the day I died."

"You're being cryptic again."

"If you must know specifically, then so be it.  Five years ago.  New Year's.  It was the day a dragon descended on Shin and decimated the seven-thousand and thirty-two people who lived there."

"A dragon?"

Jynx simply nodded.  "A dragon in the shape of a man."

"You're being cryptic again," Max sighed.

"It's none of your concern."

`````

Squall skidded to a halt in front of the kitchen door when he saw the four of them.  Irvine and Rinoa were deep into a card game while Laguna and Selphie busied themselves with watching and making flippant remarks and obnoxious commentary.

'He took a breath before they noticed him and collected himself.  _'Running down the halls at top speed for no apparent reason.  What the hell am I thinking?  That's not like me at all.'_

Granted, if they were in Garden, it would be very much like him, but also, he would, most definitely, have a valid reason for running down the hall at top speed.  Some tragedy to take care of, some meeting to attend, in short, somewhere that he had to be, and something he was about to be late to.  But in the presidential palace with a proposition of how to get his father's memory back?…such haste was not really necessary for that.

Just as he entered, Irvine reluctantly handed Rinoa a card and she put the two in her hand down on the table. "Third place!" she cheered, and Irvine grumbled something under his breath, putting his cards down on the table which Laguna collected up, put back into their box, and handed the smiley face deck back to Selphie, who tucked it into her pocket.  The only part of the cowboy's words that Squall could actually make out were, "Go Fish is a stupid game anyway."  They'd been playing Go Fish?  No wonder Laguna had done so well.  He only seemed to be any good at children's games, having, to Squall's embarrassment, beaten the younger man at "memory" and "war" almost religiously.  But they were simple games with simple rules.  There wasn't really any strategy involved, and so they suited a simple man like Laguna Loire.

"Ahem," Squall cleared his throat.  "Irvine, can I steal you for a while?"

Irvine tipped up the rim of his cowboy hat a bit and looked over his shoulder at Squall's stormy eyes and anxious expression.  It could only be about one thing.  "Sure.  Hallway?"  

Squall nodded as boots clinked against the floor and Irvine swung himself upright.  "Okey dokey," he said as he gave the trio at the table a negligent, two-fingered wave, and the door closed behind him.  Hands shoved into his pockets, he said, "so, what's up?  You think of something?"

Squall spoke, rather curtly, saying, "Winhill.  Bella Maure."

Irvine nodded.  "Well duh!  Damn, well, why not?  It worked for you guys, right?  Let's tell Uncle 'guni and see if he's up for a little trip.  We can use Ragnarock and be back by New Year's."

"New Year's.  That's right.  I almost forgot…Selphie."

"Yep.  I'm startin' ta get a little nervous," Irvine admitted, scratching the back of his head.  "I don't want to start stuttering or anything like that."

Squall shook his head.  "You'll be fine duck boy," he said in flat tones, rolling his eyes, which Irvine had learned to take as teasing. "Anyway, let's go tell him."  ….

"…well, if you think it'll help, I'm all for it," Laguna said.  "I just gotta call Kiros 'n Ward and let them know I'm gonna be away for a few days.  But we can leave right after if you want.  Why don't you go pack up toothbrushes and such, a change of clothes and everything.  "I'll meet you down by the Ragnarok in an hour?"

"Sure dad.  That sounds good."

"Alright then, let's get goin' tulip."

`````

Seifer frowned out the window at the red ship in the distance.  He'd been standing there in a rather companionable silence with Quistis for a while now, just watching the snow fall when something seemed to suddenly catch his attention.

"Seifer?" she asked, getting up out of her chair to see what he was looking at down below.  Squall and Irvine were standing on the steps of the Ragnarok, smirking and chuckling (respectively), as Laguna hurried towards them, leather jacket half on, gloves in his mouth, while he tried to figure out what in Hyne's name he was supposed to do with this blue thing called a scarf.  After a moment or two, he gave up and just slipped his other arm into the jacket, unbuttoned over a sweater with the sleeves pushed up to his elbows, and yanked on the gloves in the most haphazard fashion Quistis had ever seen.  Squall shook his head and turned around, passing Irvine to enter the space ship.  Irvine, on the other hand, took a moment to tuck the scarf into the collar of Laguna's jacket and pull his hair out of the collar, making the President look a little more presentable before leading the other man, who stuck his tongue out at the cowboy, into the ship, the steps pulling up to close behind them.

"They're leaving without me again," Seifer said softly.  

Quistis put her hand over his own.  "Well, family things are weird like that, Seifer.  Maybe, for now," she paused.  "Until they come back, let's just focus on what you plan to do next."

"What I plan to do?" he looked at her like she had three heads, like he didn't have a clue what she was talking about.

"Are you really going to just abandon Jynx like that?  After all she's done for you?  I think, deep down, you're probably a lot kinder than that.  Do you want me to call Xu?"

Seifer was silent for a long few moments, thoughtful.  "…in the morning.  You should probably check up on things there anyway, right?"

"Of course.  Then why don't we both get some sleep and talk about it more in the morning."

"Goodnight, Instructor Trepe," he said with a slight smirk and a deep bow.

Quistis chuckled.  "Goodnight Seifer….and, good luck."

"I told you, save your well-wishing for someone who needs it," he said as he remembered the day he and Squall went for the SeeD test together.

"Alright," she smiled.  "Good luck, Seifer."

Seifer chuckled in the open doorway.  "Never change, Quistis.  You're something else."

`````


	32. Chapter ThirtyOne

Disclaimers are, as always, inserted at random, and say nothing of value, other than I don't own ff8, I'll never own ff8, and I have a sneeze stuck in my nose that refuses to come out.  I hate that.

A/N: Just a note. Arashi translates as "storm" in Japanese.  Not really important to the story, but…something to think about.  Ah, I love useless information.

%%%

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-One

%%%

'One-hundred and thirty eight.  One-hundred and thirty nine.  One-hundred and forty.  One-hundred and forty one…'

"How many more times are you going to hit that wall?" Max yawned as he listened to the thud-thud-thud of Jynx's hands against the cement.  They weren't hard punches, not really.  She seemed unlikely to do any serious damage to herself by hitting the wall that softly over and over and over and over again.  It was just…getting annoying.  He could feel the gentle hits shake the wall slightly each time she connected solidly.

"As many as it takes," she answered blandly through hits.  _One-hundred and forty-seven.  One-hundred and forty-eight._  "To get back the hands that I had…when I was…"_One-hundred fifty-two. _"…still an Arashi."  _'One-hundred fifty-four.  Hands that…one-hundred fifty-five…never failed me.  One-hundred fifty-six.  One-hundred fifty-seven.  One-hundred fifty-eight.'_   A few reps more and she sat down against the wall, crossing her legs into a half-lotus position.  She felt her knuckles, her palms, the spaces between her fingers.  _'Two more days.  It will be Tuesday in two more days.  If I continue at this pace, that will be enough time to build up the proper callouses once again.  I didn't realize the gauntlet had made my hand so frail.  That simply won't do for the task ahead.  I can't rely on that weapon any longer.'_

Jynx leaned her head back and rested her eyes.  _'The power to kill GF.  And all I have to do is reunite him with his son?  What aren't you telling me, Kinneas?  I may be little more than a vengeful soul trapped in the body of a soldier, but I know there's more to this than you're saying.  For that reason, I think it would be in my best interest for them to chase us around for a while. That will give me time to figure out what it is that you're trying to hide.'_

The door opened.  It was that young man again.  "Miss Jynx.  You've got a visitor."

Jynx gave a curt nod and stood up, moving to stand before the young man.  And strangely, the thought that struck her man first was, _'he's a lot taller than me, but Seifer  is still taller.  I barely come up to his chest.'_  It was an idle thought with little meaning, but it caught her off guard.  _'Why am I thinking about him now?'_

"I'll have to cuff you, Miss Jynx."

"Do what you must," she said softly.

%%%

Seifer had spent all night thinking about it, and most of the morning, as the information he and Quisits received from Xu that morning cycled through his brain.  _'Xu's younger sister.  Second of three girls, coming from a small Galbadian city located very near Galbadia Garden.  Jynx Arashi.  She was never very good with emotions, but that doesn't mean she didn't have them, Xu had said.  I think sometimes, she felt things more deeply than anyone else, she just didn't know how to show it.  It really hurt her, what happened to Ruvie.  But…she's alive?" Xu had smiled sort of bittersweetly at the knowledge.  "I'm glad."_

"Mr. Almsay?" Jynx asked blandly as she sat down across from him at the table in the tiny room.

"It's okay, Oli," Seifer told the man.  "You can leave us alone.  Jynx and I…well, she wouldn't hurt me, and I can probably fend her off better than you could if she tried to anyway."

"Yes sir, Mr. Almsay," the young man said.  "I'll be just outside the door, just knock when you're finished."

"Sure sure. So, Jynx," Seifer said slowly.  "How are you?"  He seemed to have made his mind up about something, but for the life of her, Jynx couldn't fathom what that something might be.

"What is it that you want, Mr. Almsay?" she asked frankly.

"Well, first off, I'd like you to call me Seifer, but after four years, I guess that's pretty much out of the question, huh?"

She just stared at him.  _'Ah, the 'get to the point' face.  Geez.  Impatient much?' _ he thought.

"Well, I've made up my mind," he said, giving her a playful smirk from across the table.  "You see, you dragged me halfway across the desert to Esthar a while back, even though you could have abandoned me.  And then, every day for three years, you checked up on me, even if I was in a coma and couldn't really know whether I had a visitor or not.  So, I've decided that I'm not going to abandon you either.  And I'm going to come visit you every day, until you're out of here."

"What about SeeD?" she asked vaguely, trying to dissuade him, though her tone gave nothing away, as usual, not even the fact that his NOT returning to SeeD was something she would never have dared to hope for, until just this moment, or the fact that she couldn't fathom why she hoped for it at all.  _'I don't want him to be my enemy,'_ she thought.  That was all.  She neither knew, nor understood why that was.

"Oh, you know, they can wait.  Some things are more important than that.  Like friends, you know, and family."

He could swear her brow creased slightly for a moment at the mention of family.

"You know, I didn't realize you were Xu's sister.  We're not friends, really, me n' Xu, but I've known her for a long time."

"That's none of your concern, Almsay," she said flatly, but not as silkily as she normally spoke.  Yeah, he'd hit a nerve.   She'd dropped the Mr. that she had always put in front of his last name. "She told us…about Ruvie, and…Shin.  You don't need to keep pretending, you know…that you don't care."

Then, for the first time, he saw an actual expression on her face, it was slight, but…she frowned at him.  "It's none of your concern," she informed him in that factual way she had, but her eyes all but dared him to pry any further.  _'Is she…annoyed?'_  Well, Seifer couldn't really help but pry.  And seeing her with some sort of reaction, all he could think was, _'finally.'_  He felt like he was finally getting through that thick skin of apathy she wore.  "I'm your friend, Jynx.  Maybe the only one you've got.  Why won't you let me in?" he sighed, resting his chin in his hand when he noticed her own hands.  Pale, chafed, cut and swollen.  "Shit!  What the hell've you been doing to yourself?!?" he demanded, grabbing the left hand and inspecting the bruises.

Jynx's eyes shot up in alarm, surprise, but he didn't see it, since he was otherwise occupied.  "Training," she answered flatly.  At least he hadn't caught her off-guard enough that her voice sounded abnormal.

And Seifer got the sinking feeling that their one-sided conversation was starting to go around in circles.

%%%

Winhill.  It was just as Squall remembered it, but small differences made it not the place he left behind four years ago, and so, it was definitely not the place Laguna left behind some twenty years ago.  Was there anyone here, alive, that still remembered Laguna?  That still remembered Raine?  He didn't know, and just the locale was not enough to resurrect much for the older man.  He was trying.  

"It's…so familiar, but…I can't place it, Squall.  I'm sorry."  

Laguna sighed.  This was really hard.  He knew this place.  There was something about it that made him feel…warm and sad at the same time…but there was something blocking the memory, something buried, something that he didn't want to remember.  He didn't know what it was, only that, whatever it was, it hurt.  It hurt so much that even feeling it creeping up on him was almost too much to bear.  He'd been through the entire town, Squall and Irvine going as far as taking him down the road the way he used to patrol every day, but it didn't help.  It was…so familiar, but…

Laguna curled up in the tiny bed that Squall told him used to be his own, and frowned.  "It feels like coming home again, Squall," he whispered sadly, "but I still don't know why it feels like that."  He flopped over onto his back like a stubborn child.  "This isn't working."

%%%

Xu opened her jewelry box and pulled out the small hunk of jade with the kanji carving in it.  _'Shin.  Core.  Heart.  Center.'_  She wrapped her hand tightly around it and held it close to her chest, closing her eyes to the fast disappearing sun and letting memory flood in.

Ruvie, her little pigtails bouncing, held up the half-polished hunk of jade to her oldest sister and said, "Xuxu!  Lookit!  I got you a present!"  She had hardly been three at the time. 

Xu put her hand out and used a handkerchief to polish off the rest of the stone, and smiled.  "It's lovely Ruvie.  Thank you.  Isn't it pretty, Jynx?" she asked, holding open her palm to show the large gemstone to the serious eight-year old who sat indian style on a flat rock nearby, carving something into the surface with no particular purpose in mind.  

Jynx glanced up at the rock.  "It's broken," she said softly before turning her eyes back to what she had been doing a moment ago.

Ruvie sniffled.  Jynx always managed to make the youngest girl so sad, with her matter-of-fact ways, but Xu understood, a lie often hurt more than the truth, but that didn't mean having to constantly soften the girl's blows was any fun for her.

"It's just a small chip," Xu told Jynx.  "I'm sure you can use that knife of yours and fix it for me," she said, wrapping slender fingers around the stone.

"I might screw up," Jynx said flatly.  "So don't be mad if I make it even uglier."

"It's okay.  I trust you.  You've got strong, steady hands, sis.  If anyone can fix it, it's you."

"Have it your way."

Ten minutes later, the girl was handing her back a smooth, chunk of jade with the carving of a word in the surface where the scratch had been.  _'Shin'_.  It was the name of their hometown, but it meant so much more than that too.  "I'll shape it for you later," she had said, meaning that she would cut away the excess, smooth out the stone, make it into a shape that she would be able to wear, probably even put in on a nice cord or chain for her.  Jynx was just like that.  She didn't do things half way, but she never got around to it.  That was really, one of the last memories Xu had of the three of them, all together.  She opened her eyes and held the rugged jade to her chest.  _'Jynx.  I miss you and Ruvie so much.  Please come home.'_  But she knew, that was sort of the problem.  They didn't have a home to go to, not anymore.  "Shin," she said aloud, a few tears falling silently from her eyes.

She was startled when she felt a gentle hand on her shoulder.  "Xu?"

"Oh.  Hey Nida.  What's up?" she asked, wiping her sleeve across her face and collecting herself as well as she could.

"You're troubled," he said softly, sitting down beside her on the lonely bench in the Quad.  "You've been troubled all day.  Ever since Quistis called."

"Did you and I ever talk about family, Nida?" she asked, easing into the subject.

"No.  I don't believe so," he said.  "Something happened to your family?" he asked.

Xu nodded, and began, her voice softer than usual.  "About four years ago, just before the war, one of my sisters disappeared.  Just…vanished.  Nobody knew what happened.  I didn't really think she died, like everyone said, not really, but, I didn't dare hope that she was alive, either.  But…she's alive.  She's alive and…she's all alone."

Not knowing what else he was supposed to do, being terrible with words, and flustered around women, pretty much in general, Nida put his arm awkwardly around Xu's shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze.  "It must be hard for you," he whispered, not knowing the story, not knowing how hard it must be.

Xu buried her head into his shoulder and sniffled a bit, trying so hard to collect herself, to stay strong.  "She's not a bad person.  It's just that nobody understands her.  She just wants to be a part of something bigger than herself, that's all, a family.  It was really hard on her, being forgotten, it made her feel like she wasn't important enough to be remembered."

Nida sighed slightly, Xu was jumping around so much he couldn't figure out what was going on.  "Why don't you start from the beginning," he offered gently.

Xu nodded, wiping her eyes again and sitting up, she looked down at the stone in her hand for strength, and began.  "When Jynx was born, she didn't cry.  That is what started everything…"

%%%

Seifer stared the young woman across from him down for almost five minutes, almost demanding her to speak.  Of course, that was before he remembered Laguna whining over the intercom yesterday morning. _'This is getting me nowhere.'_

"I want you to tell me about yourself," he finally said.  "I want to know more about you, but I'd rather hear it from you, then from your big sister, who's more Quistis's friend then my own."

"You care too much about too many things," she said flatly.

"And I think you care more than you let on," he taunted.  "Tell me about your sisters."

"What would you like me to say, Mr. Almsay.  They were family.  Ruvie was young and impetuous and determined to do things her way and make her own mistakes.  Xu worked very hard to keep us all together, but in the end, she failed.  Ruvie would have hated me, if it weren't for Xu.  And our parents hated me in spite of Xu's efforts.  Why does it matter so much to you?  That was all a very long time ago."

"And it still haunts you, even now," Seifer said, giving her a  knowing, and wry sort of half-smile.  "You may think that you can hide behind that expressionless mask, Jynx, but your eyes tell me everything.  I guess you know that, that's why you wear the shades yet, to keep up the front of being nothing more than a soldier.  Right?"

"I _am_ nothing more than a soldier, Mr. Almsay.  There just isn't any place for me in this world outside of the battlefield.  It would be in your best interest to stop dreaming and open your eyes.  I am not what you think I am."

"You're only a human being, whatever way you slice it," he commented idly.

"You're wrong.  I'm a demon who was born only to destroy.  All children who are born as I was are demons who exist only to destroy.  Will you make me destroy you as well, just to prove it?"

Seifer stared at her critically for a long time before speaking.

"Che.  You're a terrible liar.  Anyway, we're talking in circles, so, I think I'll tell you a little story.  So just listen, okay, it's something somebody important to you told me not very long ago.  I think you'll like it."

Her eyes hardened on him slightly, and if he was a little less reckless, he might have reconsidered, but Seifer figured, she needed to be reminded of just this sort of thing.  "You were nine years old when Galbadia Garden recruited you.  You signed up, leaving everything behind as if you didn't care, but you left behind these little wooden sculptures that Ruvie liked.  That's why you left them, right?  Of course, at that time, you said it was because they would be useless to you where you were going.  You told Xu that she should…"

"…forget that I ever existed," Jynx whispered.  "Don't be fond of me.  Don't attatch your life to mine in any way.  If we meet again, treat me, always, as a stranger.  Life will be kinder to you that way.  What's your point, Mr. Almsay, it was the truth.  And it's not as if she listened anyway.  The past is the past, it can't be changed.  Why are you dwelling on it now?"

"Because, Jynx, the past is what makes us who we are.  It's important.  Much more important than you seem to want to admit."

"It doesn't matter.  I don't care."

"Well, I like this story, so I'm going to tell it whether you like it or not.  If you just sit there and listen, it'll go more quickly, but I've learned not to expect any one thing out of you, since you always manage to surprise me.  Now, where was I?  Ah!  Right, you'd just left for Galbadia Garden, and it turned out you were quite the little prodigy of war.  So much the prodigy, that by the time you were fourteen, they had decided to temporarily transfer you to Balamb Garden so you could learn how to use GF.  You didn't know your sisters were there until you arrived, but they hadn't forgotten you…"

%%%

ah, evil cliffies being what they are n'all…dun dun dun!  But hey, this chapter's a bit longer than the last bunch, so yay!  Not much, but still! And yes, I am well aware that I STILL haven't told you what went on with Ruvie and Shin n'all, be patient with me!  I'll get there when I'm good and ready! Anyway, this felt like a good place to stop this.  Not a helluva lot of the three stars of our little drama in this chapter, but…well, I think all this crap needs to get out too…so it was bound to happen that way.  Well, no worries, hope you liked it anyway!  R&R, and until next time, 

Happy Haunting, 

Banshee Puppet


	33. Chapter ThirtyTwo

Thanks once again to my reviewers.  Well, trying to figure out what to say in this story and what to say in the next one is too much of a pain in the arse, so I've decided Jynx is officially a main character now! (yes I know, she's been a main char for a while, sorta, but…that was unofficial—uhm, don't try to follow my logic, sometimes I even confuse myself)  What does that get you?  It gets you some actual character development and Jynx's whole story in one neat little package called "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer" is what it gets you.  I think I'll still borrow her for other stories though, because I like her. *winks*  She's my official FF8 OC.

So, disclaimers still apply, and Hikaru no Go manga is coming to Shonen Jump in January! *gushes*  Ah, manga, ah ff8…is this heaven?

_Lunatic Pandora1_: wow, that was a mouthful, but I know what you mean, I think, so yay! (only had to read it…slowly…three times)  We'll just have to see what happens with Seif's "story" though.  Gotta remain true to Jynx-ness, ya know, but she has more levels than I let on earlier in the story, which I think is starting to become obvious now.

_Ariennye:_  Thanks so much, always good to have positive feedback from new people, keeps Xav inspired and me busy!  Glad you're curious about Jynx, since she sorta fell from "cameo char" to "major role" in this story.  Ah well, she'd be happy about that…if she did happy, that is.  

%%%

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer" 

By:  Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Two

%%%

They stayed over in Winhill for one night.  It was pointless to stay any longer, it wasn't helping, and it was making Laguna depressed, which was trying on Squall and Irvine.  After all, when Laguna got depressed, he got annoying—well, more annoying than usual, that is.  And Squall was not known for his patience.  

They thought they might have more luck in Bella Maure, talking to someone he knew, someone who remembered him might help.  And Kennedy was there.  But Laguna had been the one who knew it's exact location, and he couldn't remember it now.  They thought they'd be able to find it, having been there before, and having the Ragnarok to work with, but the desert sands had hidden the town once again, and the winds were so rough, that without a reckless, yet somehow genius pilot like Selphie at the helm, it was far too dangerous to stay.  "It isn't worth our lives Irvine, pull back.  We'll go back to Esthar, get exact coordinates, and come back.  We'll bring Selphie.  Even Laguna agrees with me on this one.  Let's get out of here."

"Damn it all to Hell!" Irvine cursed under his breath before turning away from the massive sandstorm.

%%%

It would have been easy to just shrug her off to being Jynx, if she had said nothing, but she remembered the exact words she said on that day.  _"Don't be fond of me.  Don't attatch your life to me in any way.  If we meet again, treat me, always, as a stranger.  Life will be kinder to you that way."_  The fact that she remembered proved to Seifer that it was true, he was right, she cared.  She may not want to care, may not want it to matter at all, but it did.  It mattered.  In fact, he was now more convinced than ever, that it might just be the only thing that did.  

"That was about seven years ago," Seifer told her.  "You were fourteen.  When you arrived in Balamb, Xu and Ruvie were waiting for you at the docks."

"Why do you insist on telling me things that I already know?" Jynx asked flatly, giving nothing away.  "It's hardly a productive way to pass the time."

"Like beating the crap out of yourself in a dark, dank cell is?"

"That's different.  That's training."

"Fine, so _you_ tell _me_ the story, I'm sure there's something your sister left out."  He had said it purposely, _your sister_, because it seemed to be the only thing that got a reaction out of her, however minimal.

Jynx sat silently, hands now folded in her lap and away from Seifer's prying eyes, staring at the wall past Seifer's left ear, but the blonde was as undaunted as usual.  "That's what I thought," he said.  "Man, all these interruptions, I keep forgetting where I was.  I may have to start from the beginning again."

_'If he does that, it could take all week,'_ Jynx's mind muttered.  _'I like you, Almsay, but not **that** much.'  _"Docks.  Balamb," she said, a little less than pleased to be encouraging him.

"Ah! Right, so you want me to go on after all!  See!  I told you you'd like my story!"

Jynx stared at him.  _'Damn, those eyes could freeze lava,'_ he thought.  "I am merely encouraging you to get this pointless trip down memory lane over with, since you are so insistent upon giving me a history lesson, complete with facts that I already know."

"Anyway, you sort of expected Xu to, you know, not listen, since she never did, right?  But I'll bet having a nine year old Ruvie plow into your hip caught you off guard.  After all, she'd only been four years old when you left."

He was right, at that time, it had surprised her, not that she showed it.  A slight tightness at the corner of the mouth, a slight narrowing of the eyes, just an instant, a barely-there furrow of the brow, but Xu had always noticed those things about her better than anyone else.

* "Jyyyynnnnxxxx!!!!" the kid squealed as she all but tumbled face first into her hip.  Ah, yes, Jynx remembered what this was, a punishment in awkwardness that Xu had inflicted upon her more than once.  It was called a hug, it was considered a show of affection, though Xu had not been known to be _this_ enthusiastic about it, and, unlike the youngest of the three siblings, when Jynx didn't respond in kind, Xu always let go.  Ruvie, on the other hand, was clinging to her so tightly she felt as if she might have to drag the girl back to Balamb Garden attatched to her hip.  _'I suppose it would be good training,'_ she thought dryly.  But, frankly, she wasn't in the mood for training after almost twelve hours on a sticky, sweaty, foul-smelling, over-crowded boat.  Xu had gone against her better judgement once again and now she was suffering for it.  _'So much for being treated like a stranger.'  _Yes, suffering.  What was she supposed to do about hugs again?  She knew someone told her, that she was supposed to remember, but right now, with warm arms encircling her waist, she felt so strange and warm inside…obviously, this had to stop, even if prying the kid off of her was the only option that remained.  

She pat Ruvie on the top of the head, awkwardly ruffling the girl's hair, and squeezed her shoulder gently.  "Your grip is as tight as ever, I see," she dead-panned.

Ruvie just gave her a big smile, one of her front teeth missing, and said, "Lookit Jynxy!  It's the ocean!"

How could Jynx possibly forget the ocean?  She'd been riding on it all day.  But turning her head over her shoulder,  the orange flecks of fading sunlight dancing off the negligible waves, she _did_ understand what Ruvie meant.  Shin was built against the base of a mountain, the ocean was only a dream for the young girl back then, and not knowing how long the two girls had been in Balamb, Jynx could only assume that it still felt like that to Ruvie, a dream.  And it did have it's own beauty, distant and untouchable as it was, even when it was right there.  

She turned her face back ahead of her.  "Xu," she said curtly in greeting.

Xu nodded her head, for Jynx to follow, and Ruvie ran circles around the both of them as the two girls fell into step with one another.  

"Jynx," Xu greeted her back after a few moments.  "You haven't changed much," she said.  "You're still short."

Jynx rolled her eyes.  "And you still dance around what you really mean to say," she returned.  "But you've gotten quieter."

Xu gave her a bittersweet little smile and said.  "Hmn.  My ever-serious little sister.  It's good to see you again.  How long will you be staying?"

"As long as they tell me to."*

She just stared as he told her how Xu said she thought it was adorable, the way Ruvie danced around them the entire walk back to the car, chattering endlessly, neither realizing, nor caring, that essentially, the younger girl was having a conversation with herself.  Didn't get any reaction when he accused her of secretly loving her little sister, deep down, more than anything.  That led him to believe that one of two things was true.  Possibility #1:  Jynx was more Jynx than even he realized.  Possibility #2:  She'd simply zoned him out and wasn't paying attention anymore.  Surely someone who could tune out Laguna's whining could tune out anything.  But just when he was about to say something about it, she said, "you've stopped."

"Little kids are awfully talkative, huh?" Seifer asked idly, just trying to pull some words out of those lips of hers to get her focused on her story again.

"So are a few green-eyed men that I know," she returned, giving Seifer what could only be considered a pointed look.

"Oh my heart!  I think it's broken!" Seifer said, pulling his hands to his chest and laying the melodrama on thick before smirking at her.  "Anyway, what happened next?  Oh, there was some more stuff about you being a prodigy…you know, that Xu has nothing but praise for you…and then…ah right!  You and Ruvie went to the fire cavern!"

There it was, he definitely wasn't seeing things that time, Jynx tensed. It was just the barest stiffening of the shoulders and a tiny clamping of the jaw, but it was enough to convey the message to someone who knew her.  And the message was: **STOP. RIGHT.  THERE.  **Complete with warning lights and obnoxious little whistles.  Stop right there.  Don't go any further.  Don't say anything more.  Just…_don't._ For the first time since he'd known her, Seifer realized that Xu was right, Jynx _did_ feel things. _'Sometimes more intensely than anyone else,'_ the brunette woman's words echoed in his mind.  Had he been so blind as to not see it before now?  It wasn't that it wasn't there.  He just…hadn't been looking.  Whatever the case, the point, now, was obvious to him. She _didn't _ want to go there.  Not here.  Not now.  And not with Seifer.

%%%

* "She hasn't changed at all!" the nine-year-old huffed at Xu once they'd gotten back to Garden.   Jynx had "agreed" to meet them for supper, which basically translated as she hadn't flat out said "no" when given a time to meet them by Xu, who hadn't actually said "would you like to join us for dinner" as much as "we'll be having dinner at seven.  I'll expect to see you there."  In reality, what Jynx had said was "expect whatever you like,"  but Xu had translated it easily enough as "see you then" before the girl had headed off to her meeting with Headmaster Cid.  Truth was, Jynx couldn't deny her sisters anything.  She always caved in when it came to them, always—even if it never seemed as if she gave an inch.

Xu smiled softly at Ruvie, who was stomping around her room like a thing possessed.  Ruvie and Jynx were really so different, when Xu thought about it, the youngest of their family was so emotional; she ran around Garden some days like an armondo on speed, plowing over everything and anything that got in her way, tumbling over, and yelling "sorry" as she rocketed past some unsuspecting target or other.  And Jynx, well, Xu was certain that something more had happened to Jynx in their youth than she, herself, knew, something that the other girl had no intention of sharing.  "She's still a big jerk!" Ruvie complained.  "Five years and what do I get?  You're grip is as strong as ever!  Comeon sis!  Is that the best she could do?  Pat me on the head, give me a lollypop and hope I just go away?!?  Oooo.  She makes me so mad!"

"Is that why you still keep the figurines she made for you so long ago?" Xu asked softly, causing the kid to bite her lower lip, coming down off of her wave of anger before saying quietly, "she didn't make them for me.  She just made them, because making things is what Jynx does."

Xu shook her head softly.  "She made them for you," she whispered. "Just because she never said she made them for you, or that they were a gift, or that they were yours, doesn't mean she didn't make them for you.  She's your sister, so learn to read between the lines."

That was all it took for Ruvie to fall into Xu's embrace and start crying against her eldest sister's stomach.  "What happened to her, Xuxu?  The Jynx who made figurines and caught the biggest fish and sat on the roof to watch the sunset and always took the blame and got herself grounded every time one of us did something wrong even though it was almost never her fault, and the Jynx who just stood there, chin held high, when all the kids threw rocks at her, but who beat up that boy who broke your bracelet, and who watched over us, no matter what?"  Ruvie sobbed for a few minutes as Xu soothed her, rubbing her back, before sniffling back the tears and saying again.  "What happened to the Jynx who always protected us, sis?  Where did she go?"

Xu leaned down to kiss her baby sister's forehead and said, "she's still watching, Ruvie.  You'll see her, if you figure out where to look."

Ruvie sniffled and wiped her eyes on her sleeve.  "It's almost seven," she said, voice a little hoarse from crying, "she's probably waiting for us, right?"

Xu nodded.  "Go wash your face.  She'll still be waiting when you're finished." *

"Was she…you know…waiting?" Nida asked softly when Xu fell silent for nearly two minutes.

The brunette nodded up at Nida.  "Of course she was waiting.  She loved the two of us more than anything else in the whole world."

"If that's the case, then I guess there's only one thing for you to do," Nida said, sounding more confident than she'd ever heard him.  She searched his face for it, the thing that made him so confident, but he just smiled down on her.  "Go to her," he said softly.  "I'll be fine here on my own for a few days.  I'll get Fujin and Raijin to help me out if I need it."

"But…"

"It's a family thing, Xu.  Just go.  I promise I won't do anything stupid like crash Garden into an unsuspecting town or anything.  That was Squall."

Xu put her hand over her mouth and snickered.  "And I'm sure he would love to have you remind him about that."

Nida shrugged.  "I do it all the time.  Well, when he starts getting on my nerves, anyway.  He's really pretty harmless, and deep down, I think he finds it funny…just a little."

%%%

"How is he?"

"Asleep, finally," Squall said with a slight exhalation of breath as he dropped into the seat nearest the door of Ragnarok's bridge.  "He's really stressed out."

"We all are, I think," Irvine said.  "Sorry for snapping at you before.  It was just…we were so close.  It was like I could practially see her standing there, all courage and stone.  If Winhill didn't make him remember Raine, if Bella Maure can't make him remember my mom, Squall, what are we going to do?"

_Squall, what are we going to do?_  How many times had he heard that now, or something like it.  He didn't know the answers any more now than he had then, but even then, somehow, he'd found a way to pull through.  He wouldn't have been able to do it alone though, he knew that as well as anyone.  

_'I don't know!' _ his mind seethed, tired of always having to come up with answers for everyone, but he couldn't tell Irvine that.  If it was anyone else, maybe.  He would have been able to get away with an "I don't know" for Zell, and Rinoa, hell, probably even Selphie, but Irvine had never let him off that easy.  He always reminded him. 'Cid chose you to be Commander for a reason, Squall.  You're the one best suited to it.  I know it's a lot of responsibility, but…are you planning to run away?'  Yeah, Irvine Kinneas was one hell of a pep-talker.  Right.  Actually, he always managed to make Squall more depressed and determined to do better in the same vapid instant.  And feeling like that made Squall feel like a total space cadet.  So, instead of saying 'I don't know' to try to get Irvine to leave him to sulk in peace, which would likely only result in another one of the cowboy's beloved "pep talks", he went for the middle ground between decision and outright refusal to decide.  "If that's the case," he said after a pregnant pause, "then we'll think of something."

Irvine just chuckled a little hollowly.  "You're right.  I'm getting ahead of myself again, huh?"

"A bit, but I suppose one of us ought to, and it's better you than me."

%%%

Laguna stared at the ceiling.  _'I wonder how Jynx is doing?  Same as always, probably, but I still feel really bad that I had to do that.'_  Laguna laced his fingers behind his head, stared at the ceiling, and sighed.  "I did the right thing, right?"

%%%

"Ruvie wasn't supposed to go to the fire cavern yet, and you were supposed to go the next day, but she did things how and when she wanted to." Seifer said, in spite of concerns he was beginning to have for his own health.  _'She needs this.  And I'm going to keep telling myself that until we both believe it.'_

"Remind you of anyone?" she interrupted blandly, with another "pointed look", which was really just the equivalent of looking into his eyes.  Ah, when the silent treatment and the "I don't care" treatment fail, go for the "make abusive remarks and hope to insult the topic away" treatment begins.

Seifer gave off one of his deliberate sighs and said, "you _really_ don't want to talk about this, huh?  But I think you need to, Jynx.  It's bad to keep stuff like this all locked up inside where it can fester.  Trust me on that one, I know."

"Oh?  And who do you share all your dirty little secrets with these days, Mr. Almsay?"

"Laguna."

She hadn't expected that, hadn't expected such a matter of fact answer with no hesitation.  

"..we…understand one another," Seifer said.  "Quistis and I talk sometimes too.  I want to talk with you too, but you won't let me."

"You talk to me all the time," Jynx stated.  _'What are you getting at, Seifer?  Just say it the way you always do, with no regard for anyone's feelings.  Damnit Xu!  The way he's treating me now.  I…because you told them… … …I hate it.'_

"You're right, I do.  I talk _to_ you all the time.  But you never talk back.  You need someone to talk to too, you know."

_'And now, I'm getting lectured by the one person in the entire world who's just as bad off as I am.  Figures.'_  "And, so, you've deduced that it ought to be you?"

"Well, why not?  You've known me a long time, right?"

_'Seven years.  Not that you remember that.'_  "The three years that you were unconscious don't count," she stated blandly.

"You're completely impossible, you know.  But that's kind of why I like you, Jynx.  I guess I'm a sucker for lost causes."

"You'll only end up disappointed that way."

"Maybe, but I guess we can't help what we are, huh?"  Seifer leaned his head on his hand again, giving her a cocksure, sort of knowing smirk.  "So, do you want to finish the story from here, or should I?"

"It's the past."

"It's _your_ story.  I'd still like to hear it from you.  Come on Jynx, I know you're human underneath it all.  Just this once?  I'll never ask again."

Memories of that day flashed behind Jynx's eyes, bright flashes of red and gold, a smiling face, and then…and then…

"No."

Seifer frowned at her.  "Jynx."

"I can't do that."

Seifer shook his head and stood moving around the table and leaning against it, looking down at the top of her head, as her gaze didn't move from where he had been sitting before, the wall just past his ear.  To get her to look at him, he had to use his right hand to gently move her chin upwards.

"Yes?" she asked flatly.  And the oddness of the situation was just bizarre enough that he had to fight down the chuckle, but was unable to fight off the amused grin.  Her eyes looked at him, sort of, confused.  "Being human," he said after a few seconds, "it's not so bad, you know."

"It is not what I desire."

They both knew that she had no intention of telling him what it was that she _did_ desire, so he didn't bother asking.  Letting go, he stood upright, giving her shoulder a gentle, affectionate squeeze.  "Maybe tomorrow then," he said before going to the door, raising his hand to knock.

Jynx, stragely, felt as if there was something she should say at this point.  This was the closest she'd been to anyone, other than Xu and Ruvie, when they were…very young.  And he knew them—all of the important things—well, most.

_'But what am I supposed to say?  I've always sucked at this sort of thing.'_

"… … …Seifer?" the name sounded so odd on her lips.  She'd never called anyone by their first name before, other than her sisters.  And when he turned around, he had the goofiest grin on his face.  "… … … I'll see you tomorrow."

He gave her a nod, and said, "you bet you will!  And you'd better not be such a pain tomorrow, or I'm staying longer," he scolded before clinking his knuckles against the door.  "Time to go!" he said cheerily to Oli, who he knew was standing on the other side of the door, probably counting the tiles on the wall, if he remained true to form.

Oli opened the door, letting Seifer out and getting the cuffs out for Jynx, even though he obviously thought it was pointless to do so.    Seifer winked at her as he disappeared around the corner and she put her hands behind her back for Oli to cuff her.  _'…thank you…for stopping by, Seifer.  No one's ever done anything like that before.  Even so…you're still a pretty strange person.  But then again, I never **did** understand you.'_

%%%

Alrighty, well, there's another chapter down! And, tonight, I had a brainstorm at work!  I know how this story is going to end! Woot!  I have no idea how I'm going to get there…but…I plan on enjoying the journey!  And I hope whoever's reading this is enjoying it right along with me.  Cheers.  And, until next time, 

Happy Haunting, 

~Banshee Puppet~


	34. Chapter ThirtyThree

Lunatic Pandora1:  Yes, I guess that's sort of where I was trying to go, and I'm glad I pulled it off.  I don't want her to change overnight, or anything, but at the same time, I think it would be ridiculous to believe that talking about the one part of her past that is the basis for everything she does wouldn't affect her in some way.  And I decided to let the reader in a little on what goes on in that head of hers, since I'm taking pretty much all of the mystery out of her in this story anyway.  Sure, I've known all along, and now you know, but well, I think it's worked out pretty well and I'm happy with how it's turning out.  So thank you for your thoughts, cryptic or otherwise. *smiles*

Don't own ff8…do own…an alarm clock…which has no respect for my beauty sleep…

%%%

"Until The End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Three

%%%

_'Fifty-six.  Fifty-seven.  Fifty-eight.'_  Before she was punching the wall, now she was doing pushups.  Max was beginning to wonder if this girl even knew what relaxing was, let alone how to do it.  When she returned from the session with her "visitor" and he asked about it, she had said in her usual manner, "that is none of your concern."  He was really getting a little tired of hearing that.  And now, no matter what he said to her, she didn't seem to have any reply.  

"Kinneas," she grit out between breaths.  "Quiet." _'Sixty-one.  Sixty-two.'_

"So glad you're such a talker, Arashi."

"Jynx.  I've caused those people enough trouble, the Arashis."

"Methinks the lady doth protest too much."

"Kinneas.  You talk. Way.  Too. Much.  … …Just. Shut. Up. And let me.  Think."

'Sixty-nine.  Seventy.  Seventy-one…' 

_*  'It's awfully loud here,'_ Jynx thought as she sat, hands crossed in front of her at an out of the way table, a seat facing the door.  She watched the goings-on of the cafeteria with a blank expression, taking them as they came,  waiting for her sisters to arrive.  A tall blonde boy was picking on a sort of scraggly looking brunette, but just as a fight was about to start, a blonde girl broke the two of them up.  "No fighting in the cafeteria, you two," she said.  The blonde gave her a "yes mom" sort of look, and the brunette just said "whatever" and left. 

Jynx's attention shifted to the clock on the wall, then another young blonde who was skulking out of the cafeteria.  She didn't notice that the first blonde had approached until he flopped into the seat across from her.  "Hi.  Mind if I join you?" he asked confidently, as if he was sure the answer would be, and, of course she wouldn't mind.  _'Personification of arrogance.'_

"You can't sit there," Jynx said as her eyes turned to him.  "I'm waiting for someone."

Seifer looked at the clock.  Six-forty.  "They're late," he informed her.

"No.  They're not.  It isn't seven yet."

Seifer cocked an eyebrow.  "Then I have twenty minutes.  What's your name?"

"Sit where you like," Jynx said.  "I'll move."  And she stood, but he grabbed her wrist when she began to pass him.  "Hey," he said, a slightly softer look on his face.  "My name's Seifer Almsay.  You're new, right?  Tell me your name.  It won't kill you, you know."

"Jynx.  Now please let go of my arm.  I'm waiting for someone."*

'Eighty-nine. Ninety.  Ninety-one.  Ninety-two…' 

_*_  Seifer slung his arm over Jynx's shoulder.  "Heya Jynx!  What'cha doin' tonight?"

"…training."

"Again?" he sighed.  "Wanna meet me in the secret room?"

"No."

"Party pooper."*

'Ninety-eight.  Ninety-nine.  One-hundred…' 

_*_ "I hear you're making friends, sis," Xu said, falling into step beside her younger sister.

"Someone has been lying to you."

"Really?  I heard you've been hanging out with Seifer Almsay."

"He follows me around.  It's purely one-sided.  I assure you."

"Aw," Xu said.  "That's a bummer.  I mean, Seifer's sort of…well, Seifer, but I thought I might get the chance to tease you about having your first boyfriend!  I think he likes you."

"He likes the idea of me, nothing more."

Xu sighed, this topic was going nowhere.  So she changed the subject.  "Anyway, I hear you're going to the fire cavern tomorrow afternoon."

"Yes."

"Looking for backup?  I've been there before, you know."

"I hardly think that I'll need it."

Xu sighed.  "Hey, do you remember that piece of jade you carved for me, way back when?  You said you'd shape it for me, but you never got the chance…"

"I'll do it tomorrow evening."*

* "Hey Jynx!  I'm going to the fire cavern.  Wanna come?"

"You aren't ready for that."

"Sure I am!  I'm really strong!  Besides, if you can do it, so can I!"

"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, Ruvie."

"I'm going.  If you really love me like Xu says, you'll come to protect me!" Ruvie gave her a harsh expression that made her throat feel tight.  She swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood.  

"Hey! Jynx!  Where you takin' the kid," Seifer asked as he snuck up on her, unnoticed.  She stiffened.

"Fire cavern."

"Hey! Sounds fun!  I'm coming too."

"Why?"

"Because I want to."*

_'one-hundred and…one-hundred and…'_  Jynx stopped her pushups and sat back against the wall when she lost count.  Her muscles had a nice warm burn to them anyway.  _'… … …Seifer.  Why do you always insist on following me around?  What is it, that you think you see?  You and Xu…you both …you're both exactly the same.  Who is it, that you think I am?'_

Her head rolled slightly to take in the figure of a sleeping Max Kinneas, chest rising and falling with his breathing.  "You too," she said softly.  "Don't you understand that I'm no one special.  I'm no one...no one at all, really."  _'Maybe I was someone once, but…that was…such a long time ago.'_  She let her eyes drift closed.  _'I still have something to do, though.  But maybe, when it's all over, I'll finally be able to sleep.'_

%%%

okay, so I know this is a very short, very angsty chapter, but I just didn't feel comfortable with adding anything more to this chappy after that last line.  But since it's so extremely short, I'll try to post another chapter by tomorrow.  We'll see if I can pull it off.


	35. Chapter ThirtyFour

_Lunatic Pandora1:_  Rereading, I guess you're right.  That last paragraph sure felt angsty though. Meh.  I'm not worried.  And…chaotic thoughts.  Man, my chaotic thoughts should get together with your chaotic thoughts, they'd probably have a lot to say to one another…haha.  Thanks for reviewing, as always.

Don't own ff8, do own…shoelaces…lots and lots of shoelaces…

%%%

Until the End of Eternity, and Longer

By: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Four

%%%

"…Winhill, and he didn't remember anything?  Nothing at all?  But so much happened there," Zell said as he shoved his dinner into his face.  Laguna was off somewhere with Kiros.  

Irvine shrugged.  "I don't really know much about it.  But…fact is…"

"…there isn't anything that holds any meaning to him there any longer," Squall finished for him.  "We thought, Kennedy still lives in Bella Maure, and there's Jace's statue…so maybe…"

"Aren't you overlooking the most obvious route," Seifer commented idly, spinning some spaghetti around his fork as he watched the noodles go round and round and round.

Quistis looked up at him, a little surprised.  He'd been so quiet lately, ever since Christmas, or even before then.  Maybe he didn't remember how he was before, or maybe the sorceress had beat it out of him when he was brainwashed, but sometimes, like now, he still looked like the little boy she remembered.  Sure, he was a bully then too, but sometimes…sometimes he almost acted human…just like now.

"The most obvious route?" Kiros asked as he walked in with Laguna, who was chewing his lip and furrowing his brow, looking sort of thoughtful and upset, as he pushed some hair behind his ear before pasting on his usual plastic grin and saying, "so what's for dinner!" as he flopped into the chair at the head of the table, where he always sat.

"Deling City," Seifer clarified.  "Irvine's old man is in an asylum there, right?  Anyway, it's a heck of a lot safer than trying to fly through a sandstorm."

Kiros furrowed his brow.  "Bad idea.  There's no telling what might happen if those two see one another again," Kiros said, giving Seifer a look that very clearly said, 'back down kid, I'm not joking.'

"Guy'd deserve it anyway, right?" Seifer said, giving Kiros a look that very clearly said, 'I think you've forgotten who you're giving visual cues to.'  "You want Laguna to get his memory back, don't you, Kiros."

"Of course I do!  Don't be ridiculous, Seifer.  I find it hard to believe that you're still so insecure as to believe otherwise.  However, I'm not young and foolhardy and I know a bad idea when I hear one.  Max Kinneas is bad news.  Bad for Irvine.  And even worse for Laguna."

"I wanna go."  It was hardly a whisper, and Kiros had to blink.  He'd never heard Laguna's voice sound so small, nor had he ever seen those lost puppy eyes looking up at him whilst tugging on his sleeve.

"Laguna?" Kiros asked, almost heartbroken by the expression.

"I—I wanna go, Kiros.  I wanna remember.  So…give Squall one of those tranquilizer pistols, and…he can shoot me if I try to do anything bad, okay?"

"Laguna, there's no guarantee that you'll…He may not even be in Deling any longer.  Technically, we don't even know if he's alive, or…"

"But it's the best shot we've got, right?" the other man said, the helpless moment passing, and him looking suddenly grave and old and tired.  "So, if that's true, then I have to go.  Irvine, this guy…he's something to you, right?  If you don't want to go…"

Kiros sighed.  He knew that look, and protesting further would be pointless.  He only hoped Laguna would forgive him, if he ever found out where Max Kinneas really was.  _'It was for your own good, Laguna.'_

"I'm going," Irvine said steadily, though his voice cracked slightly.  "Whatever else he is…he's still my father.  I think I need to go, to meet him.   If I don't, I might never have any closure, or…well, you know what I mean…so, yeah, it's going to be the three of us again, huh?"

Squall stared at Seifer through the whole conversation, but now, he spoke, remembering a rooftop conversation of not terribly long ago.  "It was your idea, Seifer.  Are you planning on coming along?"

"No," Seifer said, softly, but without any hesitation.  "I made a promise to someone important, so I can't go anywhere right now.  I think I'm gonna follow Jynx around a while longer."

"What _is_ your obsession with that creepy girl anyway?" Selphie asked rather blatantly, shrinking back behind Irvine's shoulder when she earned both a glare from the blonde, and a pout from Laguna.

"She's not creepy," Seifer insisted.  "She's just…sad.  And I want to know more."

Quistis watched his expression shift, listened to the tone in his voice, and smiled slightly.  _'You really are such a kind person, Seifer.  Deep down.'_

%%%

A FEW HOURS BEFORE:  

"Why can't I just go inside Kiros?  I'm the President, for cryin' out loud!"  Laguna protested, bouncing in his seat while he waited for Jynx to be brought out to him.

"I told you, Laguna.  No one is allowed in there," the other man sighed.  _'Not to mention that there are things in there that you don't need to know about.'_

"**You** go in there all the time!"

"That's for security purposes."

Laguna was about to protest more when Jynx sat down across from him and…stared.  It wasn't uncommon of her, but without her sunglasses, it was a little unnerving to be looked at with those eyes.

"H-hi.  How are you?" Laguna asked.

Jynx turned her eyes to Kiros then, putting her hands in her lap, proceeded to stare at the wall behind Laguna.  "I thought you would be Mr. Almsay," she stated, and for a moment Laguna wondered, _'was that disappointment just now?'_  "What's on your mind, President Loire?"

"You're doing okay?" he tried again.

"I'm the same," she answered.  "Have you changed your mind about killing me?"

"N-no!" Laguna said, horrified by the very thought.  "How can you think like that all the time.  It's disturbing."

"I choose to look at life honestly.  It wouldn't kill you to try to look at life a little more honestly as well.  You might learn a few very interesting things."

"I miss having you around, you know.  I wish things could be different."

"They can't."

Sure, Laguna knew that, but…  

A long silence passed between them while Laguna chewed his bottom lip.  "Well, it…it was nice seeing you again," he finally said, standing and moving to the door, which Kiros shoved open for him.  "You always had a way of keeping me in line, Jynx.  I really do miss that," he said softly before passing through the doorway and whispering, "maybe I always will," before the door closed between them.

Kiros stared Jynx down, but it was a battle that he was destined to lose.  If there was anything that Jynx was good at, it was staring.  "You would be wise to not say anything about _that_ again," he informed her.

"I have no intention of doing so," she replied.  "But do not be so foolish, Mr. Seagill, to believe that even a gentle soul like Laguna Loire will be so forgiving as to overlook some twenty years of lies, when he finally figures it out."

"…"  Kiros glared at her before turning on his heel and joining Laguna, looking at the young man by the door and saying, "we are done here, Leiutenant."

"Yes sir."

When the two men were alone in the hall, Laguna looked up at Kiros and cracked the strangest little smile.  "Did you see?" he asked, a giddy edge on his voice.

"See what?"

"She was wearing it."

"Huh?"

"Her present.  She was wearing it, the necklace I gave her.  There might just be getting through to that girl yet," he said happily.  "I'll have to visit her again soon.  I don't want her to think I've forgotten about her, after all." …

%%%

"Laguna told me he stopped by today," Seifer said.

"…"

"He said that you were exactly the same.  He said that you'll be just fine."

"He tells you everything, does he, Mr. Almsay?"

"Well, not when he's going the bathroom, or jacking off or anything gross, but hey, it's not as if I wanna know!" Seifer joked before reaching across the table and touching the onyx pendant she wore. "But, he said, you're heart is starting to heal.  It'll take a while.  It's in pretty bad shape, but it isn't broken."

"… … … don't say thinks like that.  Things like that are really…completely meaningless."

"Hmnh.  I think I'm finally starting to understand you, Jynx Arashi.  But I still want to know more."

Jynx stared at him for a long moment, into his eyes, as if trying to figure something out.

_'It's because you never think of yourself that you are the way you are.  That's why, all those years ago, you didn't cry, now it makes sense.  I think, knowing that, I envy you, Jynx, being able to act so totally selflessly, but I also pity you some too,'_ Seifer thought.

  
"I had a dream about you last night, you know," he said as she continued to stare at him.  "You were crying.  Silly, huh?  You'd never do that for real."

Her voice was hardly a whisper when she finally spoke, her eyes shifting downcast to well-worn hands.

"You don't remember either, do you?"

"What?"

"You don't remember either, do you?" Her eyes shot up onto him so suddenly that he flinched.

_'Those eyes just now.  So haunted.  So much pain.'_

"You really don't remember at all, do you?  Just like her.  You've forgotten there was ever even a memory there at all."  _'That day.  Why am I the only one who remembers that day?'_

"Jynx, what are you talking about?  I know my memory of the war is still foggy, but…"

Jynx shook her head.  "What I'm talking about is from long before that.  You should remember, but you don't.  Only I remember."

Seifer reached his arm across the table again and touched her hand, concern etching his features.  She was behaving so strangely.  It was the same expression, the one from his dream.  It seemed as if she had, but he would remember those glass-like eyes, wouldn't he?

"Seven years ago.  You followed me around a lot back then too," she told him evenly.  "I don't know why you did that."

Jynx looked up, finding pity in his eyes, on his features.  "That expression doesn't suit you at all," she said.  _'Don't look at me like that, Seifer.  Not you.'_

"Jynx…"

"…"

"Jynx?"

"It was snowing, that day."

"What are you talking about?"

"That day, the day we went to the fire cavern, it was snowing."

_'The story.  Jynx's story.  Is she actually going to tell me?'_

"The day that…" he tried to say, but he couldn't get passed the shocked expression he wore, like his mouth just suddenly wouldn't work properly.  He never thought that there was any possibility that she might actually open up to him, for all his efforts otherwise.

"Alright, Seifer Almsay.    You win.  I'll tell you a story, just this once."  _'It's not as if we'll be together much longer anyway.'_

His stunned expression gave way to a small, smirk, almost a smile, but a little too bittersweet.  He won.  But why was it that winning against Jynx always felt so hollow?

"Your story," he said, more softly than was his habit.

"…yes.  The story of…that day."

This sort of thing was out of their realms, both of them, so Seifer didn't know why he squeezed her hand so gently, how he knew to comfort her like that, saying nothing.  Where did he learn it?  From who?

"September 27th.  It got cold early that year.  It was snowing.  Not much, but enough to leave a slight blanketing on the grass, enough to see breath mist when you spoke, which, of course, you did plenty of.  You haven't changed much, in seven years."

"Hey!"

"It's true.  You're the one who wanted to hear this, remember.  If I don't tell it all now, I may never tell any of it," Jynx said.  As usual, her tone bordered on clinical, but her eyes, as he watched them, the light shifted.  There was so much there, in the eyes.  She must feel naked without her black sunglasses, he realized, like everything is laid out on the table.

"Go on." …

'That day, it was snowing.  The first snow of the year.  It was so quiet before Ruvie stormed into my room.  I had told them I was going to study, but really, I was watching the snow—just like I used to do at home.'

"It was the first snow of the year.  You snuck up on us in the hall.  You were the only person who could sneak up on me like that.  It makes no sense, really, as loud as you are, sometimes.  I suppose I just got accustomed to the sounds you made, so it was easy to ignore them."

"Is that why you always seem to know when I'm close by these past few months?"

"When a person becomes very accustomed to one particular thing, and then it's gone all of a sudden, they notice, even if they're…like me."

"Like you?"

"It isn't important.  Besides, you've interrupted me again."

"Sorry.  Keep going."

"…you snuck up on us and asked me where we were going so late after curfew.  I didn't think to wonder what you were doing out, just being disobedient, I suppose."

Seifer blinked, then blinked again.  "Ow." He brought his free hand up to his head.  "Man, that headache came out of…nowhere?"   He closed his eyes against the dizzy pain, just barely registering her voice saying his name before he passed out.

%%%

"Seifer?"  _"Seifer."  _* "Seifer.  You're obstructing our progress," Jynx said, staring at the young man who stood in front of the front gates, blocking the girls' exit.

"I'm not moving out of the way until you tell me I can come," he stated defiantly.   Sure, he knew he'd go anyway, she knew he'd go anyway, but he wanted to hear her say it.

"Do what you like.  Just move," Jynx stated.

"Alright!  Let's go kick some monster tail!" he cheered, hopping over the top of the gate and waiting for the two girls to join him.

Seifer looked up at the night sky, opening his mouth to let a few snowflakes fall in before taking a deep breath.  The air always smelled so fresh when the snow was falling.  

"It was snowing that day."

He looked over his shoulder at the two girls, Jynx looking at Ruvie, who refused to look at Jynx, and stomped of ahead.  Jynx just followed, leaving Seifer with an almost impotent feeling.  _'Oh!  I get it!  She can't stop her, so she's tagging along!'_

_'September 27th.  It was snowing, on that day.'_

It was definitely cold, cold enough that the walk to the fire cavern had Seifer pulling his trench coat tight around his body, and seeing Jynx walk with only a short-sleeved shirt made him shiver.  "Hey, Jynx, aren't you cold?" he asked, getting closer to her and noticing the goosebumps covering her arms.  Of course she was cold.

"Yes.  But worrying solves nothing, and thinking about it won't change anything.  I have more important things to concern myself over now."

"The kid, huh?" Seifer asked, watching the young girl that stormed some distance ahead of them and out of earshot.

"She is…more important than she realizes."

"So are you, you know."

"This isn't about me."

"You're like a knight, or something.  Only you're not a fairy tale, you're real.  I think that's pretty cool.  So, let me help you protect her, just this once."

'Alright…you win…just this once.'*

%%%

"Jynx?"

Jynx stood and stared at Laguna.  "How is he?" she asked.

"Still unconscious.  You want to see him?"

"It isn't really the best idea, Mr. Loire, from a security standpoint."

"Doesn't matter," Laguna said.  "You've always looked over Seifer, for as long as I've known you.  I can't say I understand why that is, but if you want to see him, I'll make it happen.  Consider it repaying the mountain of favors that I owe you, if you want.  I think I'll just call it helping a friend."

"President Loire…"

"Just  for now, just between us, I'm just Laguna Loire, ex-soldier.  At least for a little while.  Until my memory comes back all the way, I think me leading a country is probably a bad idea, so I'm on vacation right now.  All the same…"

"Is he going to be alright?"

Laguna was stunned by the question.  She'd never asked anything in such a matter of fact way before.  She almost seemed…genuinely concerned.

"It's too soon to tell.  But…he's pretty strong.  As long as he doesn't lapse back into a coma, I think he'll pull through.  You wanna check up on him?"

After a long moment, Jynx nodded.  "Just…one last time."

%%%

well, that chapter took forever.  But that's sort of because I hand-wrote half of it, and that always takes longer when I do it that way.  We haven't gotten to the fire cavern yet, but I think we will in the next chapter.  Once again, this story seems to be writing itself into a direction I hadn't initially intended, but…such is life.  I had a plan…once.  Alas, it was not meant to be.  Haha!  R&R.

Happy Haunting, 

~Banshee Puppet~


	36. Chapter ThirtyFive

_Lunatic Pandora1:_  Well, not only, exactly, but not too many other people are reviewing at all.  Dunno where my other chapterly reviewer went off to, but, she'll probably be back eventually.  So, I don't know how many other people are reading, but I'm only getting one or two reviews a chapter, and some of them, the only reply I can think of is "thanks" so I just don't bother since I say that all the time anyway and everyone knows at this point that I'm grateful for what reviews I get. Plus, a lot (okay, like 1 or 2, but I only have like 5 or so reviewers, so blegh)of those reviewers are still on the early stages of the story it seems (haven't gotten this far yet), so if I replied to them, then by the time they got here they'd forget what they said, so I just don't bother with that so much. And sometimes I get a review for a chapter right after I post the next one, so I don't get to annoy those people with overly-long pre-chapter commentary. I hope I have more than two or three readers, but, it really doesn't seem that way, unfortunately.  Meh, no worries.  I'm gonna keep writing anyways, because I like writing this story, so I'm going to see it through to the very end.  

Uhm, *looks back at review to see what else you said* Ah, yes, Kiros, I thought that would be a nice surprise, but, truth is, I see Laguna more as "attempted-murder-guy" if he meets up with Max again, so Kiros seemed to be a more logical choice for making the brother-in-law sit in a dark, dank cell for the rest of his life.  More on that later, probably.  And, as you commented a few chapters back,  Jynx opening up IS a bit of a double-edged sword, and things'll take a turn for the worse pretty soon I think???

_Ariennye:_  LOL!  Though, if you think hard enough about it, I could swing squeezing Ellone into this fairly effectively, you ARE right, and I have no intention of doing that, seeing as I have gotten through the story this far without her.  Don't worry, I update often and am almost 100% positive that this chapter will be the fire cavern chapter, unless the story writes itself somewhere else without my consent again, but I don't see that happening this close to that part of the story.  Anyways, thank you so much for reviewing!  As you can see, I only have a few regular reviewers, so I really appreciate it!

_Divine Heart:_ Wow, where've you been?  I wrote four chapters since you last showed your face, thought you'd disappeared on me like half of my other reviewers.  Well, hey, I'm glad to hear from you, and sorry about that 30 chapters frying your brain cells. Haha.  Jynx shows up in the story first as one of the people heading Laguna's security department when Squall and co. first go to Esthar for Christmas.  She's one of his employees and Seifer's boss, for all intents and purposes.  Later, stuff happens and she quits her job (personal differences, which I'm still sort of explaining).  But since she's also a war criminal from the sorceress war(like Seifer), Laguna is forced to arrest her.  So that's about where we're at with her now.  As Jace was to part I, Jynx is to part II, only she's not anyone's mother.  She is, however, one of Xu's little sisters.

Wow, that was a long commentary.  (Aison, where the heck are you?  I haven't seen you in weeks!  You're always on my ass about updating this, and now you've disappeared.  Heck, you're one of the main reasons this story has gotten as far as it has, since it was supposed to cap off like ten chapters ago! *pouts*)  To the rest of my rather meager list of reviewers, thank you for reviewing, as always, it makes me feel like I'm doing something worthwhile, even if I would probably do it even if it wasn't worthwhile.  And I figure, this is a primarily original character story, so a lot of people don't like to read those, and if I requested a certain number of reviews before updating, then this story would be destined to never be finished,  so I don't.  Anyway, I'm still having fun.  So review if you are too, huh?  I  think L.P. is getting lonely, up at the top of the page all by his/her lonesome. *smirks*

So, enough babbling and explaining myself.  I still don't own ff8.  In fact, the only useful things I own are a twenty year old teddy bear and two dozen packs of gum, most of which are probably stale, so unless you want those, don't sue me.

And on with the story!

%%%

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Five

%%%

Squall entered the small room where Seifer slept.  It had all the proper equipment to make it appear to be a hospital room, except that it was a little more personal, not so white.  Comfortable and warm, but also, in a way, very very cold.  It felt like Seifer's room to him, for some reason.  It felt like this room belonged to the taller man, even though there were no signs of ownership about it. He didn't really know what to make of that feeling. 

A small lamp glowed dully on the bedside table, where Quistis's book sat, her glasses folded atop it.  The blonde woman sat, concern etching her features, as she idly rubbed her thumb over the back of his palm while she held his hand.

"How is he?" Squall asked, leaning in the doorway.

"The same," Quistis replied shortly.  "Squall, I just…I'm afraid for him," she said, the stress obvious in her stiff posture and the creases in her brow from frowning.  "I keep thinking, what if he relapses.  What if he doesn't wake up?  When was it, that I started worrying about Seifer so much.  I can't seem to remember.  What the hell did she do to him?   I just…"

"We understand, Quisty," Irvine said, nudging Squall out of the way as he and the others moved quietly into the room.  "Ya just can't help but think, why is this happening?   Why now, when everything is such a mess?  But it really makes you think about the things that are most important to you."

"You want to stay with him until he wakes up, right?" Squall said blandly, not really looking at anyone in particular.  He knew what that felt like.  When Rinoa wouldn't wake up, it was all he could do to stay sane.  _'She loves him,' _ he thought.  _'She may not know it yet, but she does.'_

"Squall…"

"It's okay, Quistis.  But Irvine, Laguna, and I…we're still going to go to Deling.  If he doesn't wake up in a few days, we'll just have to go without saying goodbye."

The things that are most important to you.  Yeah, Quistis understood.  Of course she did.  She was in the same boat at the moment.  And she was angry.  Irrationally angry, really, with Jynx.  Because Seifer, also, had chosen what was most important to him, and now he was lying in a hospital bed, and Quistis couldn't help but feel as if the two things were somehow related.  It wasn't fair to blame Jynx.  Her logical mind knew that.  But even so, it's not as if the young woman would care if Quistis DID blame her.  Jynx didn't care about anything.  Not blame.  Not her job.  Not being in prison.  Not the world.  And not Seifer.  That's what made Quistis the most angry.  Jynx didn't care about Seifer.  No way did she care about him.  And Seifer knew that, he must know it, and yet, he still chose her over everything else…over Quistis herself, and over SeeD.  What was the world coming to when Seifer chose a girl over his dreams, a girl who didn't even know how to dream at all.  Duty was the only thing that Jynx knew, Quistis had convinced herself.  That's why she dragged Seifer through the desert.  That's why she checked up on him for three years, every day, while he lay there like this.  That's why…  She'd almost convinced herself that it was true, but as she looked at Seifer lying unconscious on the bed, face smooth and marred only by the tiniest pout, she had to wonder…three years.  Would she be able to live like this, every day, for three years?  The answer was no.  But then again, Quistis's angry mind intervened again, saying, _she_ had a heart, a heart that could be hurt, broken.  No.  It wasn't like Jynx at all.  Because Jynx _definitely _didn't care.  And even as she thought it, she knew it was a lie.  But it was her lie, her own, and she would hold onto it as long as the others were here, because she positively refused to cry in front of them.

"It's sorta…wrong," Zell said.  "I mean, seeing him like this.  Don't get me wrong, I still hate his guts n'all, but…a guy like Seifer should never look this…helpless."

"He looked like that for three years.  When he finally woke up, all those emotions playing across his face from moment to moment…It's been five months, but they still surprise me.  Will they ever stop surprising me?  I wish I knew the answer to that."  

The group turned to find Laguna standing in the doorway, a sad expression on his face, making him look his age.  And beside him, led into the room by her elbow, hands cuffed in front of her with thick metal cuffs bracers, was Jynx.  She stared silently at the figure on the bed, making no move once she was fully in the room.  

There was a long silence as everyone stared at the pair, Laguna and the former Captain of Estharian security, Jynx Arashi.  What in Hyne's name was Laguna thinking?!?

"Uh, guys, it's a little crowded in here, do you mind?  Just a few minutes?" Laguna asked.  He got some very skeptical looks.  "Please?" he said.  "She's taken care of him for a long time, I just thought…she should be allowed to see him too, since she's been keeping an eye on him for so long."

Staring at Jynx for a long moment, Squall was the first to move.  "Whatever," he said, and the others had learned well enough to know that that meant "let's go."  They followed, but Quistis, after standing, lingered for a moment, glaring into empty eyes that she couldn't see anything in at all.  Just darkness, an endless sea of darkness.  Finally, she moved, and said, as she passed the other girl, "what the hell did you do to him?"

"I told him a story," Jynx answered. "…but he didn't let me finish."

Quistis moved out of the room as Jynx and Laguna moved closer to Seifer's bed, but she heard a few words out of the soldier girl before she went, soft words, but as emotionless as they ever were, really, "you've interrupted me again, Mr. Almsay," Jynx said as she looked down at the motionless figure.  "… … I know you're stronger than this, so, wake up.  Wake up, and stop running away."

It was the choice of words that struck Quistis most.  _'Wake up and stop running away.' _  What could Jynx possibly mean by that.  What was Seifer running from?

%%%

*It was so cold outside, that when he walked into the fire cavern, he was almost overcome by the heat, and took his coat off, then his black sweater, tying the latter around his waist and leaving him in only his jeans and a thin white t-shirt.  He was built, and proud of his build for being as young as he was, but neither of the girls seemed to notice or pay any mind.  Ruvie was already stalking ahead, and Jynx kept a brisk pace, not a foot behind the girl.  Seifer would have to jog to catch up, if he didn't want to be left behind—and he definitely didn't want to be left behind; it would have defeated the entire purpose of coming along at all.

"Hey Jynx, what's the deal anyway?  Why the fire cavern?"

Jynx gave Seifer a pointed stare that almost seemed to say, _'you're kidding, right?'_

"You seriously don't **know**?" he heard the younger girl say as she spun around to gape at Seifer for a long moment.  "What fungar have you been living under anyway?" Ruvie asked blatantly.  "Fine I'll tell you, but only if you promise not to interfere.  This is my thing."

Seifer smirked at the spunky little girl with her bananna curl pigtails.  "Sure.  I'm only here to hassle Jynx some more anyway," he said.  It was the truth, sort of.

Ruvie lowered her voice to a whisper and said, "there's a GF in here.  And I'm gonna get 'im!"*

%%%

Laguna stared out the window while Jynx sat silently, just _staring_ at Seifer.  Who knew what was going on in her mind, but it was the way she had always looked in on him. She would sit there and stare at him for an hour, then she would stand suddenly, and leave.  It had only been ten minutes.

"What are you saying to him when you stare at him like that?" Laguna asked.

"… …simply that I have not forgotten him."

Laguna stared at her for a long few moments.  She had the most irritating tendency towards being cryptic.

"Haven't…forgotten him?  You still think about the war too, huh?"

"The war," she said thoughtfully, while she continued to stare at Seifer.  _'Which one?'_ her mind commented snidely.  "Not really."

"…stupid bomb," Seifer mumbled, still unconscious.

Laguna looked expectantly at the young man, then sighed.  "Guess he's still out," he frowned.

* "…stupid bomb," Seifer mumbled, dusting some of the char off of his shirt while Ruvie threw a potion at him.  He sputtered slightly, since she hit him right in the face with the damn thing.  

"Be more careful, Almsay.  I'm not here to babysit," Jynx told him blatantly.

"Well exccuuuussse me for living!" Seifer scowled at her.  He felt it was justified, seeing as he was the one covered in black soot.  But, once again, she had ignored him in favor of chasing Ruvie down.  They were nearly at the center of the cavern now, and the rumbling of the ground did not bode well for their situation.  Seifer cured himself fully before running after them.

And his eyes widened at what he saw when he caught up, "THAT'S a GF?" he choked back a sudden twinge of  _'I am in SO far over my head.'_  

Jynx gave a curt nod, eyes calculating as the voice boomed "**WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER?**"  

"Ifrit," she grit out as she yanked her twin katana from their sheaths.  "King of Fire."

All Seifer could think in that moment was,_ 'oh.  Shit.'_

Ifrit was much stronger than they could handle, he knew it almost from the instant they started, and Jynx was the only one of the group who had any ice magic junctioned, a few blizzards acquired on the way, and Shiiva, the Ice Queen.  If the situation weren't so bad, he would think that a cold girl like Jynx having a junction to Shiiva was something like poetic justice.  Unfortunately, that was the last thing on his mind right now.  Ruvie didn't have any magic at all, and what magic he, himself had, was virtually useless.  All he could manage to do was attack and get in the way of Ifrit when the fire king swung at the kid.  

It had become painfully obvious to him that Jynx didn't need his help.  She was just, at a completely different level.  He decided, subconsciously, at that moment, that he had to become a whole lot stronger, if he expected her to allow him to keep following her around.  Otherwise, he'd only be getting in her way.  And he wanted to keep following Jynx around, because, honestly, at that point in time, Jynx was the person that he liked best.  

Distraction, however, was destined to doom him, and a banal echo was followed by a scream as he watched, almost detatched from his body as Jynx seemed to move very quickly.  No.  He realized now, it was him that was moving, and Ruvie, both of whom had been launched and were coming dangerously close to the cavern wall!  There was a moment of blackness, his mind fuzzy, but he struggled to focus as he saw Jynx run over to the kid, kneeling by her side, saying something.  Jynx was saying something.  She looked so scared, so panicked.  And when she brought her hand away from the younger girl's head, there was…so…much…blood.  And then the world went black.*

%%%

Jynx stood.  "Alright.  I'm finished.  Take me back," she said.

"You're sure, Jynx?  We can stay a couple minutes longer if…"

"It has been an hour, Mr. Loire.  It seems we have wasted enough of Mr. Almsay's time for one evening."

"Jynx," Laguna put his hand on her shoulder, feeling her stiffen under the touch.

"I would much rather be elsewhere, when he awakens at last," she stated frankly.  And to Laguna, it sounded as if she was talking about something more than just Seifer opening his eyes.  

_'I don't ever want to see eyes like that again.  Eyes which open to a world very different from the one they closed upon mere hours before.' _ Jynx heaved a mental sigh. _'You'll be just fine without me, Seifer, just like she is.  I know this because, the greatest truth of my life, is that I am a person…that the world simply no longer needs.  And that suits me just fine.'_

%%%

* "Why would you do something so _stupid_???" Xu asked, exasperated, while Dr, Kadowaki finished putting the cast on Jynx's arm.

"Would you rather me allow her to go alone?" Jynx asked, her voice all but droning out the words.  It was a stupid question for Xu to ask.

"**I would rather you stop her from going at all!!!!**" Xu huffed.

"Then what, Xu?  I could stop her one day, but she'd try again the next.  And then the day after her.  Should we spend the rest of our days stopping her?  She'll never become strong that way."

"Why are you so set on Ruvie becoming strong?  Jynx, ooo, you're so infuriating!"

"Lie to yourself as much as you like.  The fact remains.  Eventually, a day will come when we won't be there to protect her.  On that day, she ought to be strong enough to protect herself.  Unless you don't care if she dies."

Jynx's eyes shot to the small figure in the bed as she heard the girl groan.  She got up and walked over to the bed, despite Dr. Kadowaki's attempts to continue bandaging her mangled arm, or to prevent the girl from walking with only a splint on her dislocated knee.  It was bad enough that she'd dragged her two companions out of the fire cavern on her own.  When they asked about it, she told them rather frankly, that it took her five hours to do so.  _'Why would you drag them out on your own with a dislocated knee and a broken arm?' Cid had asked her.  Her answer had been, 'What would have preferred me to do? It was the proper path, given the circumstances."_  And now, she stared down at the girl, her youngest sister, and one of the two people in her life who she deemed irreplaceable, waiting for her eyes to open, waiting for Ruvie to say something offensive, blame everything on Jynx, just like she always did.  She looked forward to seeing the young girl scowl up at her.  She waited for it.  And it never came.

Carmel eyes looked at her, blinking, a tiny pout on her lips, and, hoarsely, the girl asked, "who are you?" 

Jynx's usually quiet voice left her entirely.  Her eyes widened marginally in shock, looking almost like glass, when Xu came up beside her and smiled at the youngest girl.  "Good morning, sleepy head," she said softly.

"Oh, hey sis.  What's going on?  Who's your friend?" Ruvie asked.

Jynx's mind raced.  Ruvie didn't remember her.  She wasn't important enough to remember.  Why wasn't she important enough to remember?  She loved Ruvie—so much.  So much.  And, unable to do anything else, Jynx ran, falling over many times in the attempt as her knee faltered under the fragile splint.  But…Ruvie had forgotten her.  She'd forgotten her because of that stupid GF, that awful GF…It was all GF's fault…

She fumbled with her junction, hating the thought of having anything to do with the monsters that caused her baby sister to forget her, discarding it at the entrance to garden and did the only thing she could.  She ran, and when she could no longer run, she crawled, she pulled herself through the snow on her fingers, her elbows, tried to stand, and fell unconscious in an endless blanket of white.  It is her most potent memory.  … …

'That day, it was snowing…'* 

Jynx opened her eyes to find Oli looking down at her.  "What is it?" she asked.

"It's Tuesday," he  told her, "You asked me to…" but before he could finish the sentence, a heavy fist came down onto the back of the man's skull.  Max's fist.  And Oli came tumbling down over Jynx, who rolled out of the way to an easy standing position.  She stared at Max, who opened his mouth to speak, and said frankly, "follow me."

%%%

well, okay, that chapter took forever.  But that's primarily because I've taken on administration duties at my beloved online RP, Astelbania, after a long hiatus.  Chapters will likely come a bit more slowly from here on, but they will still come, and I'm anticipating about one a week from this point on.  We'll see how it goes.

And so, now I shall insert a shameless plug for the once again growing fantasy rp, which I love.  If you're interested, go check it out at www.astelbania.com. Unlike many current play-by-post games, astelbania is quazi-free form, meaning that a player can run an adventure, rather than relying on a moderator to do so…uhm….well, it's explained better at the site, so check it out!  It's a really fun game, promise!  If you decide to register, when you fill out the form, just say you were recommended by Thorn. *grins* That's one of my personalities there anyway!  Okay, I'm done with the shameless plug now.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter.  More coming soon.  R&R, and until next time, happy haunting,

~Banshee Puppet~


	37. Chapter ThirtySix

_Aison:_ Welcome back!  Man, you were my primary supporter for this story for so long, so I'm really glad to see you again.  I'm sorry you're confused, but it serves you right for skipping parts in one of my stories. ;-p   Haven't you learned that my longer works are complex and involving yet?  I can't  unconfuse you  without more detail on why you're confused though. …  

_Ariennye:_  I'm sorry about the less frequent updates, but what're ya gonna do?  It can't be helped.  As far as the knee, that's my bad for not explaining properly.  See, I tend to write chapters in one sitting, not reread, and I don't have a beta, so sometimes I think I explain things better than I do.  In the end, what happens is that you all end up reading the equivalent of a first draft that never gets any further than that.  But coming from someone who has pretty shot knees, I speak from experience when I say, when you can't bend the knee, you just sort of drag it along behind you as best you can.  It's far from pleasant and it hurts like hell sometimes, but it's not impossible to move that way.  Jynx is more "dragging her leg along" as quickly as she can than running, but I used running for lack of a better word so I could get the chapter out, and well, forgot to go back and change it once the inspiration left me.  Uhm…oops?  I'd tell you I'll reread before posting from now on…but…I probably won't, because I'm lazy.

_LunaticPandora1:_  Yes! On with the happiness!  And you are correct about Ruvie.  I feel bad about it being such a build-up and something so simple and sort of stupid and cliché is the result, but the important thing, I think is that Jynx blames the GF, no matter what happened to Ruvie.  I guess that's a bit of a cop-out, but that's how I felt when I was writing it.  In case we missed it, Jynx isn't really the mentally stable type.  Meh, no worries.

Well, I still don't own FF8, but I do own Jynx…and she can kick your ass, so there!

I know that it's been a few weeks since I updated, but I've been busy..and…my computer hates me.  I wrote half of this chapter, then my pc died and I had to start over, and then, it happened again.  The jerk. So, now I have to start over for the third time, and I remember all of nothing that I wrote, since it's been a few weeks, and I've been obsessed with an Astelbania fanfic I've been writing for my message board, and brainstorming a few new ideas for my original stories….uh, yeah, like I said, busy… *blushes*  Plus, I've been sketching out a basic outline of certain things to come in this story.  I really just needed to step away from it for a little while to get back some perspective, I think.  Anyway, I'm back though, and here's another chapter of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"…

~~~

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Six

~~~

*Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  The irritating sound of a wall clock breaking the silence.  Jynx, slowly, opened her eyes.  The lights were out, but light coming through the window told her the most important thing: Day.

Day, and she had no idea how she got here, or where here was.  Tick-tock. Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  A crème-colored ceiling with a tiny ridge of border around the edges, separating it from wallpaper…crème with flowers, garish roses of mauve and burgundy that reminded her of the floral pattern of an old woman's dress, or her mother's apron.  The smell of daisies.  Tick-tock. Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  Where the hell was she?  The last thing she could remember…was snow.

A cane leaned against a mahagony nightstand beneath the window.  She blinked back the bright light, squeezing her eyes uncomfortably against the light, slowly, she brought her hand up to her eyes.  A cast there.  It surprised her.  Ah, that was right, her arm was broken, one of the bones in the forearm, a few in the wrist, but not so much damage that she couldn't bend the elbow.  Ow.  Though it wasn't exactly pleasant to do so.  Her fingers were asleep.  Again—ow.  She dropped the arm back down to her side, tried to sit up.  Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.

"Don't push yourself so hard," a voice to her right said, her head shot in its direction and she blinked.  An old man sat in a chair there, looking up over a pair of narrow reading glasses at her from a book he'd been reading.  He removed the spectacles and placed them into the breast pocket of the linen shirt he was wearing.  "You've been asleep for weeks, Yuki, you shouldn't try to do so much at once," he said, closing his book and standing.

"Where…?" Jynx tried, her voice hoarse.

He walked over to her, lifted her head to give her a sip of water.  He was a very old man, but well for his age, fit.  And she was too exhausted to fight his efforts.  Besides that, the water felt good going down.

When he laid her head back against the pillow, he leaned against the wall beside the window and said.  "The men found you out in the snow, half-dead, they'll be glad to see that you've pulled  through.  I guess you have a strong reason to live."

"Where is…here?" she asked, just trying to grasp everything through the fog in her brain.

"You're in my home, in Caergen.  About forty miles west of Balamb.  We're mostly loggers here, but when someone's hurt, they always end up here, right in this room.  So just take your time recovering.  You shouldn't try walking yet.  I operated on your leg, but you probably won't be able to walk at all for a few weeks at least.  When you think you're ready, there's a cane here for you to get started with.  You must be hungry, Yuki.  I'll get you something to eat."

"Why…do you keep calling me that, my name is…"

The old man raised his hand to silence her.  "You've come from SeeD, right?  I recognize the insignia on your weapons.  So it's better that we don't know.  Until you're ready to decide where you're going, it's better that we don't know anything about it.  We'll just call you Yuki for now.  It means snow."

"Who are you?"

"My name is David.  Now relax.  And take your time.  Stay for as long as you need."*

%%%

Jynx opened her eyes and stared out the front window of the black jeep.  "How far?" she asked blandly.  

"Hundred miles from Esthar, and still a ways to go," he answered.  

"Fine.  Then keep driving."

%%%

Oli groaned awake.  His head was killing him.  What the hell had just…oh no.  Shit!

He hit his com.  "Mr. Seagill.  Mr. Seagill, are you there sir?!?"

"What is it?" Kiros asked.  

"We've got trouble sir," Oli said as he stood up, catching the wall against the woozy, nauseous feeling.  

"Spit it out, Lieutenant."

"It's Jynx, sir…and Mr. Kinneas.  They've escaped." …

%%%

"Well, that's it, Quisty, we're headin' out," Irvine said, tipping his hat at the blonde woman from where she sat beside Seifer's bed.  

Quistis looked up from her book.  "Go ahead.  We'll be right here, waiting for you three to come back.  Just be careful."

Squall gave a curt nod.  "He ought to stay near the ones most important to him anyway," he said, meaning Seifer, saying no more, before leaving.  

Laguna wanted to say something too, really wanted to say something—anything, but the words just wouldn't come to him, it was just vague shadows of words, nothing he could touch, nothing he could grasp.  So he just followed his son and nephew out the door with a "see ya soon.  Try to stay out of trouble!"

And the door closed between them.

%%%

In his sleep, Seifer's nose crinkled slightly.  He hated that smell…hospitals, the smell of detergent and formaldihide.

*Seifer's nose crinkled slightly, before he opened his eyes.  Everything seemed so foggy,  but he saw Quisits staring down at him, and he smiled.  She looked kinda cute, all worried like that.  But something niggled in the back of his mind.  Like he was forgetting…something important…someone important….*

A light swirls through Quistis's worried eyes in his dream, and suddenly he's somewhere else, watching light swirl through Edea's eyes in multi-colored ribbons.  He blinks.  Something wasn't right.  A short woman comes into his line of sight and whispers something in the sorceress's ear.  He knew her.  He knew he knew her.  

"Who…?" he tried to say, but no words came out, trapped in that light in the sorceress's eyes.  _Who is that?  _he wanted to ask.  _What did she say to you?  Why do I know her.  Is that…she's…she's the one…that I always…_  But he couldn't grasp a solid thought, couldn't grasp anything, through that swirling light.  _Is she…?  She's the…the knight from my dreams…_  It was the closest his brainwashed mind could come to the truth.  A mixture of truth, and fire, and wind, and snow…so much snow…the ice queen.  He would see her a few times after that.  At the head of an army, or whispering secrets into Adel's ear.  Covered in blood…expressionless…inhuman…but sad.  So sad…And he has another vague memory, of that girl…somewhere else…staring up a the stars, the endless and eternal moon.  And now, he's elsewhere again, his dream mind taking him to the girl's side as she stands in the Quad, staring up at the sky….

"What are you thinking, when you stare at the moon like that Jynx?"

"Simply…that I have not forgotten.  And that I never will."

"Not forgotten what?"

"Anything, Mr. Almsay.  I have not forgotten that which I cannot change, nor that which has changed because of me.  I have not forgotten this world, and I have not forgotten my promise to protect that which I am able to protect, and to destroy that which must be destroyed.  Simply, that I have not forgotten, and that I never will."

"Jynx, I…"

"It's late.  Goodnight, Mr. Almsay," the girl said.

"You don't have to leave just because I'm here," he said.

"I have been standing here for an hour.  I believe I have wasted enough of the moon's time for one evening.  Goodnight."

"Jynx…but I…I wanted to tell you…"

The girl ignored him…passing through the quad and into the hall, sneaking easily past the faculty, as if by old habit more than necessity.

Seifer sighed and looked up at the moon.  "I won't forget either," he promised.  "That you're the one…I like best."*

Seifer's eyes opened slowly on the dim bedside light, where Quistis was reading.  He looked up, to find her eyes locked on him, her features etched with concern.  He smiled.  She looked so cute, all worried like that…but, he reminded himself, Jynx was the one he liked best.  "Why so blue, Quisty?" he asked, sitting up.

It reminded her of a time she had seen him wake up before, and she suddenly remembered watching over him, also, at another time.  But she hadn't known the details then, of what had happened—only that he'd hit his head.

Quistis sighed.  "I'm glad you woke up," she said softly.  "I was worried."

"I'm okay.  I was just remembering some stuff that slipped through the cracks during the war, that's all," he said.  He seemed strange, almost peaceful, content.  He'd already made his decision.

"You're in love with her, aren't you?" Quistis asked, surprised when a pain in her chest suggested that she hoped she was wrong, that he didn't love Jynx.  Because she really…she wanted to be the one that Seifer loved.

"Love?  With Jynx?" he asked.  "I don't know that that's it, really.  She's just the person that I like best.  So I'm going to stay by her side for as long as I can."

Quistis felt her heart clench, her stomach flop.  She couldn't believe it.  Did she…did she love Seifer?  Was that even possible?  Possible or not, it seemed that it was true.  And maybe it had always been true.

%%%

I know I know, for making you wait so long, this chapter is pretty much…well…crap. And it's short…again.  Geez, I'm just so uninspired today!  Grr.  Anyway, I'll try to get things to come together and write another chapter soon…I hope I'm not confusing people too badly. Sigh.  Ah well, R&R.  and until next time, as always, happy haunting.  

~Banshee Puppet~


	38. Chapter ThirtySeven

_Luna-P:  _(yeah, not your name, but it's quicker to type…if you hate it, yell at me in your next review and I won't do it again *winks*)  I definitely agree with you about Jynx…she's very strange, but I really do like her quite a bit.  And on another note…wow!  That's a good idea!  I may have to steal it if the story leads me in that direction…

_Ariennye:_  Nah, 'tis cool. It's good to have someone to point out the little things, since I'm too lazy to do it for myself!  Haha.  I'll have to try to remember to edit that when this story is done and I start putting it up on my website though…I shall have to return to my reviews for minor tweaks like that…so it's a good thing that you're pointing it out!  Because, like I said Me=Lazy…and I don't edit…actually, I rarely even reread. Ah well…since you asked so nicely, I suppose I can tap into Quisty-brain again in this chapter or the next one…though it's really not anything too big, I'll cover it anyway.

###

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Seven

###

_Caraway.  Martine. Cid._  The names passed through Jynx's mind like puppeteer dancers in a long-forgotten play.  Well, that was just fine.  Deling City would simply make her list of victims shorter, that's all.  Two birds with one stone.  SeeD.  Jynx hated it.  She hated GF, and then, also, she hated SeeD.  And she hated General Caraway who saw to it that she was placed in that particular institution in the first place.  She had not asked for that fate, that life.  She was completely happy to just…exist in a small village like Shin with her sisters for all of her days.  _'You'll be glad to see how strong I've become, Mr. Caraway.  Allow me to demonstrate my strength, on your tragic little city, the way you and yours demonstrated your strength on Shin.'_

Two birds with one stone.  Yeah, that suited Jynx Arashi just fine.  She would get the power to kill GF, and in the interim, she'd be able to settle an old score with one of the men who ruined everything.

While Max was getting food and taking a piss, Jynx lay on the hood of the jeep, left hand resting behind her head as she clenched and unclenched her right fist.  It was a sunny afternoon, a gorgeous day really, but she wouldn't allow herself to simply enjoy the peaceful moment, there was too much to do.

_One. Two. Three.  One. Two. Three.  Open. Shut. Tense and, relax._  She stretched out her left leg thoughtfully.  _Flex. Bend. Relax._

*_Step, move, shift weight, bend knee, toes, curl, and release.  And, repeat. Step, move, shift weight, bend knee…_

Learning to walk again.  She never thought she'd have to do it…walking had always been a natural progression, like breathing, requiring zero thought…so learning all over again…it was probably the hardest thing she'd ever done.  It was spring, and she was out in the garden with David.  _Step. Bend. Release._  

"You're doing well, Yuki.  How does it feel?" he asked, looking up from the book he was reading.

"Hurts.  How should it feel?" she said flatly.

"Well, I suppose it should hurt, if you insist on putting things so frankly," David said with a sigh and a cocked eyebrow, putting his glasses away and marking his place.

"I guess you'll probably be leaving soon then."

"Yes."

"Where will you go?"

"Home."

"Where is home?" he asked evenly, coming over with her cane and helping her to a seat on the nearby bench.

"…"

David laughed.  "You have no idea, do you?"

"I'll figure it out when I get there," she stated.  He had this annoying habit of reading people extremely well…too well, honestly.  And he always forced her to talk.

"Not SeeD?" he asked.

"Never," she bit out.  "Bastards."

###

Seifer gave his Hyperion a good swing before sheathing it.  Jynx had escaped.  _'Damn.  What are you thinking, Arashi?'_ he wondered.  He hoped she wouldn't do anything stupid, hoped he wouldn't have to fight her, but, he figured that would end up being her decision in the end, not his.

"Seifer?" Quistis asked a little uneasily.  "Are you sure about going after her?"

"I already told you Quisty.  I'm going to keep following her around for as long as I can."

"Well, you won't be alone this time," a woman's dulcet voice, thick with determination came from the doorway.

"Xu!" Quistis was shocked to see her friend.  

"Mr. Seagill already briefed me.  I'll be accompanying you this time, Seifer."

Seifer nodded.  "I guess you would.  She's you're sister after all, but, what about the kid?"

"Ruvie?  She gets along just fine without two old mercenaries watching her every move," Xu replied.  "I'd rather not get her tied up in this sort of mess again.  It's not as if she can remember the last time, anyway.  And it's probably better that she never does."

"Xu?"

"It is sad, that Ruvie can't remember Jynx, Seifer.  I won't deny that—she _is_ family, after all.  However, I also won't deny that there is safety in distancing oneself from things that cause pain.  And Jynx causes pain.  Always has. Always will.  It's best that Ruvie not remember her.  She doesn't need to know."

* "He doesn't need to know," Cid was telling Dr. Kadowaki when Quistis walked in.  She was bringing back the rubber gloves that her Chemistry class hadn't used.  

"I understand," the doctor told him.  "But he's bound to remember eventually.  Have you found her yet?"

"From this day forward, Doctor, Jynx Arashi is dead."

"Doctor Kadowaki, Mr. Cid.  Sorry to interrupt…" Quistis said meekly.  "I was to bring these back…"

"Ah, Quistis. Yes, thank you.  I guess you wanted to check up on my patient too, but I'm afraid Seifer hasn't woken up yet."

Quistis's eyes went wide. "What?  Seifer's hurt?" she chewed her lower lip with worry.  "What happened?"

"He hit his head.  He'll be alright though.  Go check up on him if you want," Kadowaki said. 

"O-okay. Thanks…"* 

It wasn't long after Quistis had walked in, that Seifer awoke.  He just sort of blinked up at her…and smiled.  But the words that hit her now, were the most potent… "he doesn't need to know."  Was that true?  Perhaps.  But he had had _a right to know_, didn't he?  And Ruvie…she also, had a right to know, whether she needed to or not…but was it really her place to say?  Could she really interfere, when she was in her position…on the outside, looking in.  The answer was…she didn't know.

She just found it particularly sad, and sadder still, because it was very obvious to her, that Seifer had absolutely no desire to ever forget Jynx.  Because Jynx was…the person that Seifer liked best.  Her stomach flopped again.  Hyne, she hated this, hated being weak and indecisive, but she thought…she'd never change, not really, maybe never.

"I…I'm going to come too, if you don't mind," she said, her voice, to her, sounding small, meek.

Seifer blinked at her.  "Quistis…why?"

Quistis had to think about the answer.  She didn't really know why.  She was just being impulsive.  "Because you're my friends, and she's important to you."

###

Laguna paced the foyer.  How he ended up in Caraway's mansion was beyond him.  Sure, he was some political big-shot in Deling, but it's not as if they were here on business, or anything.  But Caraway was one insistent bastard, seemed like the sort who always got what he wanted.  And at current moment, he wanted to talk to Squall and Irvine…which meant Laguna was abandoned in the entranceway to pace, or hassle the maid, who'd run off at the sound of an oven-timer.  He'd inspected all the paintings in the room, gotten bored, started counting ceiling tiles, lost count, got bored, played with a fancy looking vase…dropped it, did his best of hiding the evidence, got bored…so that only left one option…pacing.  Pacing, pacing, and more pacing.  He sighed and leaned against the wall.  This was taking forever.  He crossed his arms over his chest, and sighed.

###

"What is it you wanted, General Caraway?" Squall asked as he leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest.  Mentally, he sighed.  Not that he had anything against his girlfriend's father, really…but the man's timing sucked.

"As you know, elections are coming up."

"Actually, I didn't," Squall replied, hoping to cut off a speech before one started.  _Nor did I care._

"Then let me cut to the chase."

_Please do._

"I require SeeD assistance once again, a guard team until the elections."

"Call Garden then.  No offence, General Caraway, but we're in Deling on unofficial business, and I ain't tappin' into my vacation just because you think you need a guard dog," Irvine commented humorlessly.

"I'm sorry to hear that. Anything I can assist with?"

"It's been my experience, Mr. Caraway, that your assistance is never without its price.  You can contact Garden and someone will be assigned, but we won't be handling it personally."

"I'm sorry to have inconvenienced you with concerns for my life, Mr. Leonheart, Mr. Kinneas."

"No problemo.  Well, see ya!" Irvine said, swinging himself up out of the chair he'd been lounging in.

"You may be Rinoa's father, General, but that doesn't mean that we're at your whim.  There are just some things in this world more important than business," Squall said dryly, and from the look on the General's face, it was obvious the man didn't understand.  Squall sighed.  "Like family, for example.  Goodbye."

###

"You're certain you know the plan," Jynx asked evenly.

"Of course!  For Hyne's sake, Jynx!  You've gone over it with me like, fifty times!"

"There will be no room for mistakes or improvisation, Mr. Kinneas.  You must behave in the exact manner as prescribed."

"I understand!"

"You'd better.  I have no tolerance for incompetence.  City Hall.  Tomorrow at 3:37 p.m. exactly.  Do not be late."

"What am I supposed to do until then?"

"Frankly, Max Kinneas," Jynx said dryly, "I shouldn't care any more if you spent the entire time helping old ladies across the street or molesting small children.  It makes no nevermind to me.  Just be there.  And should you see me in the interim, treat me as a stranger, and pretend I don't exist." …. …. ….

Max sighed.  His "instructions" had been very specific.  

            Rule #1:  Don't speak to me.  Don't act like you know me.  Pretend we are strangers, always.

            Rule #2:  Stay away from the mental institution.  Should you hear news in its regard, pretend you haven't heard it.  

            Rule #3:  City Hall.  3:37 tomorrow.  Act according to predetermined instructions and do not, under any circumstances, deviate from the script.

            Rule #4:  Duck.

He'd asked her what that meant.  Duck.  What was he supposed to be ducking.  She had told him simply, "when the time comes, you'll know."  Stoic bitch was keeping secrets.  Max didn't like secrets.  In fact, he was fairly certain it would not be an exaggeration to say that he _hated_ them, _loathed _them, _wished they didn't exist._  But it was alright, really.  Jynx was strong.  If Jace had been a little more like this kid, things might have turned out differently.  Well, it didn't matter in the end, because he was going to get what he wanted, and all he had to do, was adhere to those four—simple—rules.  No problem.

_Alright then, Jynx Arashi.  I'll leave everything up to you._

###

Jynx rested her head in her hands wearily.  How had it come to this.  She honestly didn't know.  She sighed heavily, and let her eyes fall closed, letting the tension of the past hours roll off as she squatted by the windowsill, the moonlight dancing over her shoulders, tracing lines across the syringe in her hand.

* "You're impossible!" David sighed.  "How do you expect to get better?"

"You said it yourself, David.  I am healing quickly on my own, through my efforts.  So I don't need that, whatever it is," Jynx stated, pointing at the syringe in his hand like it was something vapid and foul and completely out of the question.  Of course, her tone never changed, her expression never changed, but it seemed to her an old and exhausted argument.  How many times had they been over this.  Medicine was something she neither wanted, nor needed, and she wouldn't suffer it as long as she had the will and energy to say otherwise.  She just didn't like the stuff.  It made her mind foggy, she couldn't think straight, and thanks to David, she knew exactly what most medicines consisted of now, and what they could do.  Well, no thanks.  It just wasn't for her.

"It will help you heal!  You can walk again, sure.  In a month or so, if you keep up this inhuman pace that you insist on, you may even be able to run, but you aren't doing things the proper way, Yuki.  You need medicine, and you need rest, or that wound…you're always going to feel it, Yuki," David said, sitting on the bed beside her, resting his hand tentatively on her shoulder.  "You'll never be able to forget."

Enraged, Jynx ripped the syringe from his hand and threw it across the room.  The glass shattered against the floral wallpaper and the pale liquid dripped across the floor.  She stood, staring down defiantly at him, stunned.  She had never shown him any emotion other than a blank sort of melancholy before now, but that was definitely something he recognized, anger.  Her face didn't show it, but her body did. The tension in her shoulders, and the way those haunted eyes turned liquid nitrogen cold, steamed, then solid, hard, in an instant.

"I don't want to forget," she stated, words clipped and harsh.  "And my name is Jynx, and I think I've stayed here long enough."*

Idly, she wondered what had become of that old man.  Dead now, most likely.  And besides, it didn't matter.  There was only one thing that mattered anymore, and she would go as far as necessary to get it, to have it in her two hands. The power to kill GF.  Revenge.  Cold, cruel, remorseless vengance. It was all that was left of her.  She knew that now, as she held the empty syringe up to the moonlight and moved to dispose of the evidence.  She stepped over the old doctor's body, a man, not unlike David, but nothing like him, and no one she knew.  Looking back blandly over her shoulder, she said simply.  "Nothing personal.  It's simply that your life was necessary for my plan to work, that's all.  As far as anyone else will know, you had a heart attack, but you and I will know the truth."  She lifted the nameplate from his desk,  "Doctor Evarent Doyle, PhD," she read before placing it back down, a black gloved hand tracing over the smooth gold surface of the plate before tipping it over onto the ground, making it look as if the man had knocked it over when he grabbed the desk, before he fell, "you were a casualty of war.  It can't be helped."  She knocked, also, the phone receiver off of its base.  His body was arranged exactly as prescribed.  And, without further words to exchange, the task complete, she departed stealthily into the night.  She looked back at the building once only, eyes tracing over the perfectly formed lettering above the door.  _'Deling City General Psychiatric Institution.'_  She turned, dropped her sunglasses over her ghost-like eyes, and, hands in pockets, walked out into the winter street, thinking about another old man, ages ago, who had given her the chance to live again, without question of what she would do with that life.  She thought about him now, for reasons beyond her fathoming, and it came to her suddenly, that the path she had chosen… … …he wouldn't approve of it.  Well, whatever, it's not as if it mattered what he thought, anyway.  His opinion had affected her life little, even then, if at all.  She felt something cold and wet hit her cheek, and looked up to the sky.  It had begun to snow.  She stood for a moment, just watching _"Yuki, what will you do, when you can walk again?"  _she remembered. _"Nothing that would interest you, David."_  That is what she had told him then.  Knowing what she knew now, were she to go back to that moment, she would have said exactly the same thing, about that, and everything else.  

Her eyes fell ahead of her again, and, after only the briefest of pauses, she began to walk.  This weather always made her knee ache, and she couldn't suppress a slight limp as her boots tapped against the asphalt.  _'I don't want to forget and my name is Jynx and I think I've stayed here long enough.'_  She caught a few snowflakes in her hand and watched them melt.  _'And David is a memory only, and 'Yuki' is long dead, and my name is **Jynx**, and I've still got a lot of work to do.'_

###

okay, a few things to note. First, I know this chapter, once again, took me forever.  But a long time ago, I promised a certain person a certain Christmas fic, so I had to take a time out to write it.  In truth, I think a few weeks away from this story was actually good for it though, as I've returned with my mind much clearer on how it all ties up, with only a few loose ends that may yet surprise me.  Secondly, I know the end scenes of this chapter with Jynx are a little confusing as to what exactly is going on.  It was done, for once, purposely, to build up some suspense, sort of.  What the heck is going on, I think the careful reader could start to guess at with what I've written here, but it will all be explained in further detail in the next chapter as Jynx's plan begins to unfold.  Hope you enjoyed the chapter!

And until next time,

Happy Haunting, 

~Banshee Puppet~


	39. Chapter ThirtyEight

SPECIAL NOTE: I have, upon request, started a mailing list for anyone who wishes to be emailed when I update my fics.  (It's a really short list so far.) Anyone who would like to be added to this update list should send me an email at bansheepuppet@fuckingwicked.com. All you need to do is send me an email FROM THE ADDY YOU WANT THE UPDATES TO COME TO.  You don't need to send any major emails.  Just type "add me" into the body of the email and I shall do so.  This email address is used strictly for story updates.  As such, I likely won't check email there often, if at all.  If anyone feels the need to email me anything not regarding updates, use my standing email address as found in my user profile.

_Lunatic Pandora1:_ *holds up hands in surrender*  Okay okay! Sorry kit!  Not the chibi omega!  Anything but that! I give up.  No more cheating with the typing of your name, scout's honor (granted I'm not a scout, but meh, let's play make-believe so that it sounds good).  And, on other, more serious notes: wohoo!  We'll just have to wait and see how things unfold.

_Aison_: good to see you are no longer confused. *pats you on the head like a good little puppy and gives you a Scooby snack*  I hope the rest of the story is also "kick butt", as you so claim.

Weeeelllll….is it just me, or is this like, the never ending fanfic?  Haha!  Actually, I think we're finally approaching something resembling an end, in a few more chapters.  Well, I think a few more fun chapters to go though.  After all, can't end it with my poor 'guna still all amnesiatic, now can I? Well, we shall see what my evil muse cooks up, whatever the case.  As usual, updates are sporadic, at best, disclaimers are inserted at random(like here: don't own it, shall never own it, just playing around with it, so don't sue!—see, like I said, here), and nobody, including the authoress, knows what's about to happen!

And so, we push ever onward, into another chapter of "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer".

====

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

By: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Eight

====

Laguna chewed his lip.  Irvine paced.  It was Squall who had to do all the talking this time around.  He spoke with the nurse.  The nurse told him all of the important things.  He scowled.  He tried the questions again.  The same answers were revealed.  

Frowning, he stood before his father and Irvine, who looked at him anxiously.

"If you keep looking at me like that, they're going to mistake you for patients," he stated dryly.

"Did you get a room number?" Laguna asked, wringing his fingers into the folds of his shirt.  He wasn't really sure how he was supposed to feel about being here.  He knew that _here_ there was something he was supposed to remember, but…

Solaris's light burned behind his eyes.  It made everything else seem not quite as bright as it used to be, and whatever other question he was about to ask was lost somewhere in the back of his mind.

"According to the nurse, there are no records of any current patients by that name," Squall said.  "And any records of former patients would be locked in the safe of the late Dr. Doyle.  He died last night.  Heart attack.  Whatever the case, if he was here, he's gone now."

Irvine sighed.  And it was half relief, though annoyance also burdened him a bit.  He didn't know how to feel about coming this close to meeting his bastard father only to have it reneged at the last moment.  They'd come a long way though, and it was hard to believe that it was a wasted trip.

The three men flopped onto the couch in the waiting room, Squall leaning forward, elbows on knees, Irvine with his feet on the table, Laguna with his head leaning back so he was half staring at the ceiling…

What had gone wrong, and what were they supposed to do now?  They would think of it.  It would come to them suddenly.  They just needed a moment to consider it all…

====

Max Kinneas looked up from his beer.  The news.  This was one of those bars that always played the news, as if the people here weren't coming to get _away_ from the world.  That's why people went to bars, wasn't it, to get away?  That's what Max had always thought, and yet…the news.  Well, one can only escape the world for so long, could only fly so far away from it all before the truth came beckoning and….

The man looked at his hands and sighed.  They'd been strong hands once, but the pores had gotten larger, and the skin more creased with age.  Max Kinneas was not an old man, younger than the recluse of a president known as Laguna Loire, that was certain, but the years had not been as gentle to him, and the age showed where Laguna's baby face made him look hardly more than thirty-five.  Max made a fist.  He was still strong, but not half of what he once was.  

It was idly now that he thought of Jynx, his current partner in crime.  Would she grow old as he had?  Would her skin wrinkle like this, become this loose to the bone?  He was exaggerating his own condition, he knew, but he'd been in that dark cell so long that he couldn't look at the sun anymore.  He shoved his sunglasses a bit further up his nose and took a long, thoughtful swig of his beer.

Jynx Arashi.  She really pissed him off.  She just walked through life like she was walking through a graveyard.  She was strong, and she had goals, he was certain of it (though he had no idea what those goals might be), but it seemed more like she was seeking her goals not for accomplishment, but end.  What did she want?  He knew only that it had something to do with family.  Something….

His eyes shot up as he heard the words, "And in other news, Dr. Evarent Doyle of the Deling Psychiatric Hospital passed away last night…"

'Deling Psych…Dr. B. Doyle…' Max mouthed the words, eyes widening slightly. _'She killed him,'_ his mind blanketed the realization.  He could imagine it.  She would kill someone just the same as she did everything else, with perfect calculation and without remorse.  It would be nothing more to her than brushing her teeth in the morning was.  Nothing more than pulling her hair back into that dramatic bob of a ponytail…

That stupid ponytail.  Always perfect, every hair always in place.  He wanted to rip out that damned rubber band and force it to fall.  It just pissed him off, how perfect it was, just like her, perfect little soldier girl, perfect little doll.  But that's just the way the world was, wasn't it?  Always turning people into shadows of what they could or would or should be…just like Jace.

Nevermind that there wasn't a thing about Jace's life that couldn't be, either directly or indirectly, blamed on him. He couldn't see that.

Right now, an image of a doctor he never met, a forged letter with his name burning a hole into his pocket, and the image of a stone-faced Jynx Arashi were the only things his mind could contain—that and the image of an old woman gasping for breath and, frightened, falling limp in his arms.  He shivered.  Jace's mother.  He'd killed her.  He hadn't meant to.  It was an accident.

But what Jynx had done…totally deliberate, and he didn't know if he respected that…or if…he hated it.  He just knew it terrified him, a bit. Just enough to make him think, to wonder at how far he was willing to go.  Well, it had already begun, there was no turning back now, unless…

There was one trump card left for him to play, one way, perhaps, of controlling the hurricane that was Jynx before it swallowed him whole.  He looked up at the bartender.

"Hey, you have a phone I can use?" he asked.  Thankfully, the bar was all but deserted at this time of day.  He wouldn't have to raise his voice.

He dug the phone number out of the pocket of his jeans, looked at it again, deciding if he wanted to go this far.  He did.  And so, he dialed.  It would be about 5:30 in Esthar now, and night.

===

Ruvie sighed, dropping her coat onto the armchair.  Work, this time of year…it was just hell.  Gladly, Christmas was over, but doing all the returns was almost as annoying.  Anyway, she was content.    She thought about Xu.  It didn't look like she'd be seeing her older sister this year, but that wasn't really news.  Xu came by when she felt like it, it seemed, and she never stayed long.  

Sure, Ruvie knew that Xu was an important person, that her job kept her busy, but she still had a family, right? Even if it was a family of one.  She wasn't bitter, really, she just wished her big sister would call once in a while, or write, or something.  Something had happened a long time ago, she knew that.  It was obvious, from the way Xu acted, never really talked about work, and didn't stay for more than a short amount of time, that something had gone wrong.  But Ruvie didn't know what.  There was this odd gap in her memory.  An accident in the training center, they had told her.  She had been with another student.  When Ruvie had decided to talk to the other student, find out what had happened or if the girl knew…they said she'd died.  And that knowledge seemed to hurt a little more than it should.

She turned on the desk lamp and pulled her sweater over her head.  Ruvie had given up on memory a long time ago, in truth.  She couldn't remember, so instead of spending her life searching for a fragmented past, she decided to live for the moment.  But even with that…her apartment was still so dark and lonely when she came in at night.  There was nobody to welcome her, no one to tell about her day at work.  She had no photographs, just a poster on the living room wall of Shuri, her favorite glam rocker.  

She moved into the bedroom, depositing her sweater in a wicker laundry basket by the door and caught a glance of herself in the mirror.  She'd filled out into a neat hourglass figure, curvey hips, though she thought her breasts were perhaps a bit too small.  Ruvie sighed.  "What would you think of me now, sis?  Little sister's all grown up.  I wonder if you'd even recognize me at all.  I bet you look just the same.  Proper and professional in your SeeD uniform.  Of course, you probably have a few more pins and strips now, not that I'd notice them anyway."  

Ruvie moved to her dresser to fish out something comfortable to wear.  She wouldn't be going out tonight, so there was no point staying in her day clothes.  "What's it been now?  Two years? Three?  I'm starting to lose count."

And just as her fingers touched a comfy gray sweat shirt, the phone rang.  A moment of hopefulness was quickly passing.  Just because she was thinking about her sister, didn't mean she would call.

"Hello, Ruvie here," she said cheerfully into the line.

It was a man's voice that graced her ears, and not one that she knew.

"Miss Arashi, I presume."

"Yes?  Who is this? Can I help you?"

He didn't answer the questions. "If you want to see your sister again, come to Deling City Hall, 3:37.  That's 10:37, Esthar time.  You can make it, right?"

"Wh-what?  What do you mean if I want to see her again? What's happened?"  Ruvie's heart jumped into her throat.

"Nothing. …yet.  You haven't got a lot of time to waste you know."

In a slight panic, Ruvie dropped the phone onto the receiver, not caring that it actually fell to the side of the bedside table, threw on the gray sweatshirt and grabbed her scarf, coat, hat, and purse on her way out the door. 

The dial tone rang through her apartment as the door closed behind her, catching the corner of her scarf, which, rather than retrieving, she left to hang limply where it had gotten stuck.  Whoever that was, if he was telling the truth, then he was right, she didn't have a moment to spare.

===

* "I don't understand…" Mr. Arashi said slowly.  "What exactly is it, that she'll be expected to do?"

Martine must have explained it a dozen times, and Jynx understood.  _'I don't want to go,'_ she thought. _'But if I stay, I'll only keep making them sad.  SeeD.  It's a pretty new thing, as far as history goes, but, I've heard about it once before.  Mercenaries for hire.  They'll want me to fight.  They'll even…probably…want me to…kill.  I bet that it's not as hard as it sounds.  You probably get used to it.'_

It was as Martine was about to explain again that Jynx stood.  Her blank expression betrayed nothing.  It had been her movement alone that designated her wish to speak.  Silence fell.  Everyone stared.  Jynx had merely sat there, staring out the window for the past two hours that Martine had been present, and for an hour before that.  She had not deigned to move when the man had entered, nor when he introduced himself to her; she had done nothing for three hours now, just staring out the window at the bright summer sun, the children playing, trying to catch a bird that was out of their reach.  She remembered another bird, long ago as well, but now was not the time to think on such sad stories, especially not when a new chapter was about to begin.

But now, _now_ she stood.  And the anticipatory silence weighed heavy.  Why was it, that for her, new beginnings always felt  so stagnant and heavy?  "… .fine," she said.  

"Now, Jynx, think about…"

"I have made my decision, mother.  I will go."

"No!"  Ruvie's outburst had surprised them all.  "Why do you want to leave us?!" the child demanded.  "Do you really hate us that much Jynx???"

Jynx could only stare.  Her chest felt so tight that she couldn't speak at her baby sister's accusation.  _Do I hate you that much???  Is that what you think?  No, of course not.  I could never hate you, Ruvie.  Not ever._  But what would have been pain and sadness on anyone else's face at such a moment…it was only Jynx's same blank stare.  The eyes looking at the floor, some hint of…something there, but… …

Emotions were just far too confusing.  They never came off the right way, even when she tried.  When she was very young, she tried practicing in the mirror.  It was only tensing and relaxing of muscles, after all, she was sure she could train her face to move the right ways…  but smiles always looked like grimaces,  and frowns looked like pouts, raised eyebrows only made her stoic expression hint at some mild confusion or surprise, but nothing even remotely convincing.  Eventually, she just gave up.  There was no point in trying.  And by the time Ruvie was born,  the blank faced Jynx Arashi had become set in her ways.  It wasn't that she didn't care.  It was just…she was someone completely unnecessary in this world, a child who couldn't cry.

It had been proven some years ago that it was actually some sort of disease, a muscular disorder, but that didn't matter, the old beliefs still stood.  She would bring despair on everything she cared about. 

Well, the truth hurt—but at least it was better than hiding behind a lie.

"I've made up my mind," she said finally.  "It makes sense for me to go.  It sounds like just the sort of place I belong."

"The sort of place…you belong…"  Xu whispered, and put her hand on Ruvie's shoulder to prevent further outbreaks before turning to Martine.  "When does she have to leave?" she asked steadily.  Level-headed Xu; she'd always been that way, and the stranger known as Martine nodded his approval at this level-headedness.

"I will send someone to pick her up two weeks from Thursday."

And again, Jynx said, "fine," before turning her blank stare out the window once again.  The children were still chasing that bird.  _I think…that birds are made for flying, _she thought._ Anything else is just unnatural.*_

Jynx opened her eyes and stared at the clock as she let her sleep-weary eyes focus.  She had a bit of time yet, so she turned her attention out the window again.  Birds: they were everywhere these days, and the city was no exception as she watched an old lady feeding pigeons down below, across the street.  What was it about people always insisting on domesticating wild animals.  She didn't understand it.  It went against nature, and she couldn't see anything to be gained from the act. After all, pigeons were dirty, and cities were dirty, and people continued to make little to no sense.  She rolled her head back away from the window, sitting silently, staring dully into the darkness of the old bell tower that rested above City Hall.  

Plenty of time yet.  Over an hour before she had to be in position.  Again, she closed her eyes.

===

Xu opened her eyes.

"What were you just thinking about?" Quistis asked gently.

"Hmmn?"

"You looked lost in thought," the blonde woman clarified.

"Oh, a little.  I was just thinking of Shin."

Seifer's eyes darted across the train car at the dark-haired strategian.  "What did you just say?" he demanded in that gruff way he had.

It startled her a bit, but Seifer had never been one for manners.  "I was thinking about Shin," she said.  "The village where we grew up."

Seifer and Quistis exchanged a look.  _Shin._ Shin is what had started everything, that stupid necklace with the kanji "shin" on it that Laguna had given the girl as a Christmas gift.  It was hard to believe that had only been a few days ago.

"It's gone now though," Xu continued with a bland sort of sorrow.

"It's…gone?" Quistis asked.  

"It was demolished by a GF.  It was nine years ago, this past Tuesday."

Again, Seifer and Quistis looked at one another.  Tuesday had been the day Jynx had escaped.

"A GF destroyed your village.  Why?" Seifer asked now.  Finally, they seemed to be getting some answers.

Xu paused, memory coming back in flames and black soot.  It took a while, but eventually, she spoke.  "Well, you see…they were looking for Jynx…"

* "Stop it!  I already told you!  She isn't here!!"  their father had yelled to the man who sacked them with GF over and over again.  

"Don't lie for her!  She's a demon, a shinigami!  Where else would she go?  Don't be foolish.  I'll keep starting fires until she comes out!"

It was Xu who recognized him.  Through smoke and flame, with Ruvie clinging to the back of her leg, she saw his face, his eyes.  It was the man who took Jynx away; it was Martine.  And of all the times to come.  They were home for the Christmas holidays, and Ruvie had only just lost her memory thanks to the fire cavern.

Where was Jynx?  No one knew.  They just knew…she wasn't here.  But it affirmed something for Xu Arashi: her sister wasn't dead. *

"They destroyed everything.  Nearly everyone died.  And she wasn't even there.  They were so certain she was, that she would come out eventually, but she never did.  And when there was nothing left to burn, they left.  It was a hollow reassurance, it being right after Ruvie lost her memory of Jynx to the fire cavern, but…at least I knew that somewhere, my sister was still alive.  In truth, I'd almost given up hope of that until you called me over the holidays asking if I knew her, Quistis."

"…so then…it was on Martine's orders that Shin was destroyed?" Quistis asked.

Sadly, Xu shook her head.  "Not exactly.  He was the one who headed the assault, yes.  He was the one who sacked us with that GF over and over again, yes.  But, actually, if you trace it back down to why they were there in the first place, to who accepted General Caraway's contract to have Jynx found, of who signed it, and who told them, "whatever means necessary" never thinking they would _actually_ go that far…if you take it all back to basics, then…it was Cid."

===

 note:  shinigami translates, for all intents and purposes, as "god of death" or "angel of death", to the best of my limited knowledge.

Well guys, a bit of a cliffy again!  I hope I'm finally clearing up questions that you may have had up to this point.  If not, feel free to fill your reviews with questions, so that I don't miss any, since we ARE winding down at long last, and if you want to be added to my nifty-shifty mailing list…send me a line.  Until next time…

Happy Haunting,

Banshee Puppet


	40. Chapter ThirtyNine

LunaticPandora1: Basically, yes.  His attempt at controlling an uncontrollable force, that force being Miss Jynx Arashi.  Keep reading for more detail.

Lost Sorceress: thanks!  Finally a new reviewer!  Geez, I thought I only had like two readers for the last like twenty chapters.  That made me sad. Blah.

---

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Thirty-Nine

---

She remembered everything.  After she had run away from Garden, when Ruvie had lost her memory, when she was in Caergen being nursed back to health and taught how to walk again, Caraway had commissioned a job to have her found.  He was the one who wanted her to join Garden in the first place.  "It'll be a good opportunity for you," he'd told her, and then Martine had come….

And after she'd disappeared, Caraway had ordered her found.  Cid had agreed to it, and sent Martine to head a party to find her, since Galbadia Garden, which had just been built, was much closer to her home village.  But she hadn't found this out until later, after she'd left Caergen and David.  She had decided to, if only for a little while, go home again.  Home to the only thing that held any sway over her any longer, home to her family, home to Shin… …but she had been too late.

*It would be too dramatic to say she returned to smoke and flame.  The smoke and flame were long gone when Jynx had arrived once again in Shin.  It was barren, nothing but burnt and charred remains.  There was no one here now, at least it didn't seem so, but someone had buried the dead, and someone had marked their graves.  It was in what had once been the town square.  It was around the crumpled fountain.  There were no names, and the ground was still damp from a recent rain, but small pieces of wood had been tied together to form makeshift crosses.

She was stunned, shocked.  What could have caused this sort of devastation?  A little pink dress caught the corner of her eye and she squatted down, picking up the baby doll with only a few blond curls remaining.  She straightened the dress, staring at it for a few moments before carefully placing it back down.

A voice from behind her dragged her attention away and her head shot over her shoulder.  "Welcome home Jynx," he said sadly, standing badly bandaged in the remains.  "Sorry, didn't mean to sneak up on you like that."

"… …Mayor Westfield," she stated, acknowledging his presence as she stood.  "You're injured."  Some blood was seeping through his bandages, and she led him to a bit of fountain that served now as a passable bench while she changed the bandages soundlessly.  

He said nothing at first.  He smiled down at her.  "You've always been a good girl, Jynx," he said softly, green eyes smiling sadly on her blank expression.

She just stared at him.  What was this weird man going on about now?  He was famous for non-sequiters, for comments that came out of nowhere.  

"I was just remembering the day you found Mr. Samson."

"The bird.  Sorry."  She hadn't meant to…do that.  Birds were just, such fragile creatures.

But the Mayor waved it off.  "Your heart was in the right place," he said cheerfully.  "Always has been, always will be.  Sit with me a while?"

Jynx nodded, sitting down stiffly in the makeshift graveyard beside them.  In truth, her mind was elsewhere.  These graves.  Were her parents here, what about her sisters, were Xu and Ruvie…

"All of the children who survived the attack were sent to orphanages," he said with a slight frown.  "It's sad but, with all the adults gone, and Shin in this state…I'm afraid they wouldn't survive long here.  Maybe I won't either,  but I'd rather die here than somewhere else.  Ruvie and Xu are okay.  Xu has gone back to SeeD.  She sent Ruvie to live with some cousin of yours in Esthar," he stated.  "Shaken up.  You're parents…were very brave.  Very strong.  But I guess I can't expect any less from a military nurse and an ex-police officer."  He pointed to a pair of graves.  That was them, her mother and father, right over there.  He didn't need words to explain that.

"What happened?" Jynx asked finally, the shock wearing off and allowing the flow of thoughts to return more naturally.

"SeeD.  They came looking for you, but you weren't here.  Funny, a day later and things probably would have gone differently.  Sorry, my mind is wandering a bit.  That General Caraway who got you the application for SeeD was pretty upset when he found out you'd gone missing after what happened to Ruvie.  Apparently Cid accepted the contract. Martine led the attack."

A day?  Even for SeeD, only a day to do this much damage. … "A day," she stated.

Mayor Westfield nodded.  "They had a GF with them.  A massive dragon.  I think they called it Bahamut.  They just hit us over and over and over again. …"  he sighed.  "Jynx.  Promise me you won't go back to SeeD.  Never go back.  Please?"

There was a pause as the information sunk into her brain.  _Cid. Martine.  Caraway.  SeeD and GF.   _These were her enemies.  

She gave a curt nod.  

"What are you thinking right now, I wonder," he said softly.  "It's always so hard to tell, but it doesn't keep me from wondering."

"I'll avenge Shin," she informed him.  "That's all.  I'll avenge my people."  She stood.  "It's the only thing left for me to do."*

"It's the only thing left," Jynx said with a sigh as she opened her eyes, checking her watch and clicking the rifle together.  She stared down the sight.  She hoped her aim still held true.  It had been a long time since she'd had to shoot a rifle, but she was sure it would be fine.  After all, whatever else was true, her heart was in the right place. Heh.  _Mayor Westfield.  You've always been far too forgiving a man._

~**~

The woman behind the front desk wore a red and black suit.  Her short brown hair was curly and her gold name badge read, "Hello, my name is Silvia Roh."

"Yes, you said your name was Mr. Kinneas?" she asked, red fingernails tapping away at the keys.  "Just one moment while I pull up your file.  Alright, would that be Maximillian Kinneas the III?"

"Yes, thank you," Max said, the woman's strong perfume grating on his senses and his nerves.  He looked at the clock.  He'd gotten here at 3:37, as planned.  Now it was 3:42.  No Ruvie.  Beautiful.  She _had_ to make it, because the longer he stood here, the more sure he was of one thing.  This whole plan was a very bad idea.  He'd just call it off, talk to Irvine, make him understand….yeah, that's all.  It wasn't his fault.  Nobody else had to die, right?  Right?

When asked, he handed over the letter.  "I'd like to reinstate my citizenship status.  This is a letter from my doctor, saying I'm fit to be a productive member of society again…" he said.  So if he decided to call it off, why was he still acting according to the script?  

The door opened, and Max's head turned to see who was entering….

Jynx's eyes narrowed.  3:45.  That meant Caraway was here, and as she looked over the ledge, sure enough.  Well, show time then.  She punched a few commands into a pocket computer, hit the "send" button and readied her rifle….

"Are you sure, Quisty?" Seifer asked as they approached the building.

"We are looking for information, aren't we?  I can't think of a better place to find that than Deling City Hall."

"Good point," Seifer agreed with a sigh.  "I hope she hasn't done anything stupid yet," he commented as Xu entered the door….

Ruvie ran.  She'd gotten lost and now she was late.  _Late. Late. Late.  Hyne-damnit!_…._can't I be punctual  just this once???…  _Apparently that was too much to ask…..

"Hey, what the…?"  Silvia Roh sighed at her computer.  Why did it just freeze up like that.  A flashing yellow light appeared in the corner of her screen.  "Oh.  Please hold on a moment Mr. Kinneas, Mr. Caraway.  I'm sorry, it seems I've got an urgent call," she said as she clicked the flashing yellow light. 

Huh?  

"What the…?"

"Is something the matter, Ms. Roh?" Caraway asked, leaning over the desk.

"Is this a prank or something, what is that supposed to mean?"

"What does it say?" Max asked, curiosity peaked, forgetting why he was here for a moment.

"It just says, "Duck."  Silvia answered.  "Is this some sort of prank?"

'Duck'.  Max mouthed the words just as the computer started beeping erratically and, well, ducked, as the whole damn thing blew to bits!  'Jynx! Goddamn insane masochistic bitch!  You'll know.  I am beginning to _hate_ that woman!!!' he thought irritably. As pieces of the desk flew on top of him.  He wasn't really sure what happened next.

As Xu, Seifer, and Quistis entered the building, there was an explosion.  Xu, acting on instinct, pushed Caraway out of the way while Quistis dove at the woman.  

But if that was all that happened what was that loud bang, and why was Xu bleeding so badly.  Gunshot!  It hit Seifer's mind like a delayed reaction. Sure, he knew that sound.  Hell, he'd gotten shot at or shot by Irvine enough that he still had nightmares about loud banging noises. 

Everything happened in slow motion then.  Quistis rushed to Xu's side.  Was she going to die?  He didn't know.  He looked up, spotting _someone_ moving among the rafters. And then, a piercing scream rang out from behind him, as a panicked girl ran over to the two other SeeD.  

"Xu!" Ruvie cried out.  "Xu open your eyes!"

The shock wore off suddenly when something heavy slammed into the back of Seifer's skull and he went smashing into blackness and the lobby's tile floor.

_Shit shit shit shit and double shit!_  Jynx's mind was cursing her out.  It wasn't supposed to go like this!  Xu wasn't supposed to get shot! She wasn't even supposed to be there!  The shot was supposed to take out Caraway, then she goes in, takes Max as a hostage, Irvine, who's in the city would come at hearing that his father was under the custody of a madwoman, she'd get what she wanted, he'd get what he wanted….but what the hell was Xu doing here? Xu was supposed to be in Garden!  And Seifer and Quistis…weren't they in Esthar?  What the hell was going on?  No, calm down, stay calm. Keep to the plan.  This could still work….

Quistis and…was that Ruvie?!!!?_  Max you bastard! What were you thinking you damn inbred….grr!_

That still left Seifer to get by though, and shit again! He just saw her.  Doing the only thing she could think of, she grabbed something heavy from the rafters, which turned out to be a nicely sized rock, and threw it at him.  Her mind winced as it clonked into his skull and sent him crashing to the ground.  _'Sorry Almsay, nothing personal.  I just…I have a people to avenge.  Maybe someday you'll understand.  I'm loyal to my home. That's all._

Jynx took a deep, calming breath, and leapt down from the rafters.  It may not have been as organized as her original plan, but it would simply have to do.

_B-Plan. Version One. For the power to kill GF, no problem._

~**~

Laguna, Irvine, and Squall had been watching soap operas while sitting in Deling Psych, trying to figure out what to do when something suddenly switched on the television.

***_This is an urgent news bulletin!  I repeat, this is an urgent news bulletin!  Watching it as it happens is Channel 12 Reporter Donna Davidson.  What's going on out there Donna?…_

_      "Well, Frank, there's been a shooting at City Hall today.  It looks as if General Caraway was the intended target, but a SeeD from Balamb Garden got in the line of fire!  It seems as if she'll survive.  A medical team just arrived on the scene.  But the woman, still has a hostage in the building.  Can you tell us anything Ms. Roh?"_

_     "His name is Max Kinneas…I… I don't know who she is though!  Such a scary looking young woman?  Why would anyone do something like this?!" she cried.  ***_

The three men looked at one another and without the need for speech, ran out of the mental institution.  

"Irvine!" Squall started to say.

"Already on it Commander.  I've got Shiiva and Carbuncle. You?."

Squall nodded as he reached for his own junctions, "Ifrit and Leviathan."

"I thought you had Diablos?"

"Loaned him to Zell. Mission."

"I have one too!" Laguna announced, glad to be, 'in the loop' for once, like anyone could forget about Solaris.  Solaris was a shadow that loomed over everything the three of them did these past days.

All Squall could grumble was, "let's hope it doesn't come to that."  

~**~

well, there's another chapter down.  We're closing in on the end boys and girls!  I'm thinking perhaps one more chapter and an epilogue. Maybe.  Or two more chapters and an epilogue…*chews lip* well, not much more anyway. ttfn.

Happy Haunting,

Banshee Puppet


	41. Chapter Forty

WARNING: original character death in this chapter.  But I'm not telling who! Read on!

Well, let me open by saying that I think the last chapter sucked.  *frown* Seriously, it's definitely not some of my best work, but at least I got in, I think, a sensible explanation of what Jynx's issues are.  Heh.  Well, okay, she has a lot of issues, but I think I explained things okay, I hope.  But the chapter still sucked.

Breif summary of non-flashbacky action.  Jynx's plan backfires when both of her sisters show up and she accidentally shoots Xu instead of Caraway!  Xu is currently being treated by some EMTs while Squall, Irvine, and Laguna rush to city hall after a good round of their favorite soaps(heh heh, oversimplifiction), Quistis is with Xu, and Ruvie is not far off, with the EMTs out in front of City Hall, and Seifer is unconscious after being hit in the head with a big rock.  Elsehwere, Jynx is holding Max "hostage" in the upper levels of the building.  The secretary is talking to the reporters, and Caraway is…well, you'll see in a minute….

~**~

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Chapter Forty

~**~

Contrary to what everyone thought was best for him, General Caraway didn't hurry out of the building.  Instead, he took it upon himself to lift up a rather heavy dead-weight Seifer Almsay up.  While he's in the process, Seifer groans awake.  "Hyne-damnit Jynx," he grumbled under his breath, one hand coming up to the back of his head.  He felt a good sized lump, but gladly, nothing that needed stitches, and cast a quick cure on himself before he realized that someone was holding him up.  He opened his eyes blearily to find General Caraway holding him half-bridal style, which basically translates as he had an arm around his back, but Seifer's long legs were dragging along the ground.

Shaking off his weariness, Seifer rights himself.  "Uh, sorry."

"Did you just say Jynx?" Caraway asked, brow furrowing.  If it was the Jynx he thought, then he'd been right all those years ago.

"Same one, most likely," Seifer answered.  "Care to tell me what the hell you did to piss off such a blank girl as Jynx?"

Caraway sighed.  "That young woman, is one of the most dangerous people alive," he said.  "I got her enrolled in SeeD a long time ago, because it was in my best interest to do so."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Where is the one place that a murderer can kill and never be noticed?" Caraway asked.

Seifer shrugged.  He hated riddles.

"In a war, Mr. Almsay.  I put Jynx the one place that her actions could be tempered.  And then, things went wrong. That mess with her sister," he sighed.  "She had to be found, you understand, before she hurt anyone.  She's not mentally sound, never has been."

Seifer shook his head. Now it made sense.  Caraway had wanted Jynx where he could keep an eye on her.  "You tried to control a hurricane.  What did you think would happen?" he scoffed.  "It was stupid.  If you'd left her alone, she'd still be in that silly little village, most likely.  The one that was destroyed because of you.  No wonder she's pissed.  Don't go blaming Jynx for your stupid mistakes."

Caraway's eyes narrowed.  "What is she to you?"

Seifer just turned a winning smile on her and swung Hyperion over his shoulder.  "Jynx is the person I like best," he said cheerfully.  "So I have to make sure she doesn't do anything stupid.  She go that way?" he asked, pointing with his sword.

Caraway nodded, and then said, "I'm coming with you."

But after a moment, he crumpled to the ground.

"Actually, you're not," Squall said dryly.

Laguna waved at Seifer, smiling.  "It's for his own good!" he said cheerfully.  "Let's go save Jynx!" he said before running up the back stairs, hopping over debris that had fallen from the small explosion Jynx had caused.

"Well, at least he's enthusiastic…I guess," Seifer said with a sigh before following the Estharian president.

~**~

Ruvie looked up and gasped.  "Xu! On the roof look!"  

Luckily for Xu, it was only a shoulder wound.  She'd fallen unconscious from the shock, but had woken up a few minutes ago and had gotten briefed on the situation by Quistis.  She looked up and frowned.  She'd know that ponytail anywhere.

~**~

_Shit shit and double shit._  Jynx's mind wasn't going over much else right now.  She'd managed to back herself into a corner, but at least she had plenty of explosives set to a timer through the building.  But the fact that the SeeD were about five seconds ahead of them wasn't helping any, as she found herself and a now frightened, captive Max with a blade to his throat cornered on the roof with one president and three SeeD who happened to all be very good at their jobs.

"I won't hesitate to kill him, you know," she stated, pressing the blade tighter.

"Jynx, come on, think about this," Irvine tried, getting his logical mind around the desire to hurt the man that Jynx had in her clutches.  The man who ruined his mother's life, and his own father.  So this was his father… Well, he probably deserved this, but, Irvine would have settled for a good fist slamming into his face.  It all seemed a bit…. …excessive, even for the rather complex Miss Jynx Arashi.

Jynx stared at Irvine.  "I would think you of all people would want to see him dead, Mr. Kinneas," she stated.

Max's eyes widened. "… …Irvine."  He should have known. He looked just like… …and Max sighed. It was true, everything about him…he was Jace's son.  Max could never take him away from her, he saw that now. He'd been foolish to try.  Of course, knowing that was awfully lonely.

"He may be a stupid bastard who deserves to die," Irvine says, "but _you_ do it, and you'll have to deal with the consequences.  It isn't worth it Jynx," he said, taking a step forward.

Acting on instinct, she held him by the throat over the edge of the building.  "You'd be surprised," she said evenly.  "Wouldn't it give you closure?  Or you, President Loire?"

Laguna hadn't said anything, he was just staring, jaw set in a very unguna-like manner.  Squall now saw the expression.  "Dad?" he asked.

"I won't say that after all he's done, it wouldn't make me feel better," he said evenly, glaring at the man hanging, gasping for breath, from Jynx's hand.  "However, I will say that there's no reason for you to be involved in his fate in any way."

"There's every reason," Jynx said.  "I'll do whatever it takes to avenge Shin."

"What do you want Jynx?  Isn't this the part where you're supposed to make demands?" Seifer prodded, hoping to bring her mind down to it's normally logical level.

"What I want?  I want the power to kill GF."

Laguna's hand came to his chest.  He could almost feel it, her pain, as he saw the necklace he gave her on Christmas hanging around her neck like some sort of broken anthem to her lost home.

"But Jynx, there is no power enough to kill GF.  Only a sorceress can do that," the president said.

"That is not," Jynx said, "the answer that Mr. Kinneas wanted to hear," she said as she let go her grip.  Irvine quickly cast protect on the man, but it wasn't enough.  It was a long drop, and Max Kinneas hit the pavement with a resounding thud, his skull smashing open in a mix of brain and blood against the hard pavement as an explosion broke the building in two.  Flame and blood.  It seemed that where Jynx went, blood and flame were not far behind, but before the fire consumed the air between her and the SeeD, the surprise of what she did as her fingers let go and the body of Maximillian Kinneas III began to fall heavy toward death, froze the SeeD in action.  Because it was at that moment that Jynx's lips curled into a very deliberate and definitive smirk.

"JYNX!"  It took Squall and Irvine both to keep Seifer from jumping into the flames to try to save her.  "We've gotta get out of here!" Irvine reminded them deliberately as Laguna kicked down the door to the stairs and the smoke rose, blackening the sky and everything in it.

"JYNX!" Seifer called again, his eyes filling with unexpected tears.  But there was no answer, and with a little more force from the two other young men, he followed down the stairs, with one last remorseful look over his shoulder.

~**~

"Irvine, use Shiiva to put out the fire before it spreads anymore," Squall said.

"Right," Irvine answered, going for the junction when his eyes widened.  

"What is it?"

"Squall…it's Shiiva.  She's not here," Irvine's eyes were wide with shock.  He'd had her junctioned only a moment ago, he was sure of it.

"Shiiva is missing?!?"

Irvine nodded sheepishly.  "She was just here.  I had her junctioned, I know I did!"

"We'll worry about it in a minute.  Grab a hose Irivine."

"R-right."

~**~

Laguna looked at the boys and sighed, sitting down next to Seifer sadly.  "How did she take it?  Xu?  That Jynx is, you know?"

Seifer shrugged.  "Xu?  She took it the way Xu takes everything.  She nodded and said, _I understand.  Well, I suppose it's for the best._  For the best, Laguna.  Jynx is dead, her own sister, and she says it's for the best.  What a bitch."

Laguna put his hand on Seifer's shoulder.  "Jynx was a pretty lonely person though, you have to admit.  She's probably a lot happier now…"

"You don't buy that and you know it."

"You're right.  But thinking that way makes me feel a little better.  Maybe she'll watch over you the way that Jace and Raine watch over me."

Seifer looked up, a little startled.

"Well," Laguna said with a warm smile, "you loved her, right?"

Seifer looked down at his hands.  "… …yeah, I loved her."

~**~

The End!!! Well, sort of! Haha. I'm going to go write the Epilogue now! Wohoo!  I think the last few chapters of the story sucked, but, they wrapped everything up okay I guess.  It's hard, b/c they've really been a compilation of a bunch of very short scenes all happening very close to one another and at the same time.  Ah well, epilogue is next!


	42. Epilogue

Well guys, this is the end of it.  I was productive today, two chapters and an epilogue. Go me.  I've had a lot of fun writing this story, so I hope you've liked it, but it is time to say adieu and move on to bigger things. (like planning the next story in the series! Woot!…though that won't be for a bit yet.  Hopping back to inuyasha to finish a current story b4 going through the cycle again.  I have a very evil muse. Meh.) 

Well, without further adieu, the conclusion of  "Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"…

~**~

"Until the End of Eternity, and Longer"

by: Banshee Puppet

Epilogue

~**~

ESTHAR:

"Who was she Xu?  That woman who died in Deling City?  You knew her, right?" Ruvie asked, sipping her cocoa as she stood staring out the window.  She seemed older somehow, since she'd returned to Esthar.  

Xu had taken some time off to visit with her baby sister.  After Jynx had died, she just needed time to spend with family.

"She was…an avenging spirit, Ruvie.  That's all. Anyway, don't worry about.  She's nobody you need to be concerning yourself with," Xu replied evenly.  It was best that Ruvie never know.  That's what she kept telling herself.  Things would be easier now.

Ruvie didn't answer right away.  She sipped her cocoa, staring out the window, remembering.

* "Catch it Jynx! Catch it!" the little five year old told her older sister.  She knew that if anyone could catch Mr. Samson, Mayor Westfield's parrot, it was Jynx.  The damn bird had gotten out again, and half the town was about trying to catch the bird.  

Jynx chased after the bird and finally, grabbed onto it, holding it protectively.

"You got it!" Ruvie cheered. 

Jynx opened her hands to find the little bird with a snapped neck in her hands.  She'd been too strong for her own good, or the bird's.  "I…didn't mean to," she said softly.  

Ruvie sniffled.  "You…killed it," she whispered.   "It's not moving anymore."

"What are you to whispering about?" Xu asked as she walked over.  

Ruvie looked up at Xu with tears brimming in her eyes and tackled the eldest girl in a hug.  "Jynx killed Mr. Samson!" she wailed.

Jynx just held the bird up to Xu.  "I didn't mean to," she offered again.

Xu just sighed.  "Come on," she said.  "We'll bury him under the cherry tree."*

"You're a terrible liar," Ruvie said finally.  "And I hate you both."

"Wh—"

"Don't you care that she's dead at all?"

"Ruvie…your memory…?"

"Xu.  Get out of my house."

~**~

BELLA MAURE

Laguna smiled sadly at the statue as it was torn down.  Jace's statue.

"Are you sure about this?" Squall asked softly.

Laguna nodded.  "She would have hated this thing.  Honoring one war hero when so many people died.  We've decided to replace it with a monument to all of the heroes of the war."

"I think she'd like that," Irvine said from the other side of Laguna, with Selphie clinging to his arm trying to look cheerful on such a sad occasion.

A tear rolled down his cheek as the crane smashed into the statue.  _'Happy New Years, Jace,'_ he thought.  _'I'm ready to move on now.  Sorry for causing so much trouble.'_

Quistis looked over at where Seifer stood a few feet back and away from the others.  This was something neither of them could understand.  They hadn't been here at that time.  All they knew was that it was something  that had something to do with family and nothing to do with either of them.  They stood in silence, and as the others headed back to the Ragnarok, Quistis turned and finally decided to speak, to tell him the truth.

"Seifer, I…"

"Quisty, I…sorry, go ahead."

Quistis smiled a bit and giggled. "No, it's okay, you first," she said.

"I wanted to thank you.  You know, that whole mess with Esthar and Jynx and all.  You're a good friend.  So, you know, thanks.  And if you tell anyone I just said that, you're in for it!" he scolded, turning the machismo back on.

A good friend, the words hit her hard.  _'Only a friend though…'_ she thought.

"So what did you want to say?" he asked.

"Oh, it's nothing important," she said, waving off the topic.  "I've already forgotten.  Blonde moment."

"Haha. Okay, let's get going then.  This village is way too depressing anyway."

"… …yeah."

~**~

SOMEWHERE IN THE DESERT

The wind whipped through her hair and she squinted against the sand.  She wasn't sure how long she'd been walking, but she knew it wasn't much farther now.  

_'I can feel it.  It's so close.  The power to kill GF.'_

Her lips were cut and chapped, she was dehydrated, hot, her flesh was torn.  If she didn't find water soon, she was going to die.  _'I won't die yet.  I won't die until I have it.'_  

These days, she could hear Max's voice in the back of her mind.  He wouldn't leave her alone since she had killed him.  He haunts her.  Another ghost from the past.

'It was nothing personal,' she tells him, and he replies,  _'I almost wish it was.'_

A cool breeze swarms around her, and her mind relates to the sensation, one she knew all to well. "Shiiva.  I told you to go away.  All GF are my enemy now, even you.  Leave me alone, or I'll kill you first."

Shiiva's response was to hold a bit of ice to the girl's lips, _Drink,_ she told Jynx.  _Please._

Jynx was distracted by a strange sensation.  _'I can feel it.  It's so close.  The power to kill GF.  It is within my reach.  I've finally found it.  I know I'll find it.  The power… …it is my destiny to find it… the power to destroy.'_

~_THE END~_

~**~

Well, it's been a long road guys, but the story is finally over.  But the arc is far from over, so keep an eye open for future stories!  The arc is called "A Family Thing".  It'll be a while before I start the next one, but it'll be Selphie, in order of time it'll come after this fic, like a sequel, sort of.  So if you want to see more characters frolicking and maybe more of Jynx, look for it! cheers, and it's been fun guys!

Until next time, 

Happy Haunting,

Banshee Puppet


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